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Old 03-22-2008, 09:22 PM
Hyacinth Bucket Hyacinth Bucket is offline
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Default HOW DO INSTALL A HUSBAND - Programming and Systems


Just received this and thought it was cute.

HB

INSTALLING A HUSBAND

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a
distinct slow down in overall system performance -- particularly in
the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under
Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs,
such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed
undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0, NBA 3.0, and Golf Clubs 4.1.

Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes
the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but
to no avail.

What can I do?
Signed, Desperate
------------------------------------------------------

Dear Desperate:


First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while
Husband 1.0 is an Operating System. Please enter the command:
'I Thought You Loved Me.exe' and try to download Tears 6.2 and don't
forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.

If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then
automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

But remember, over use of the above application can cause Husband 1.0
to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1.
Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly
Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in
the background that will eventually seize control of all your system
resources).

Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These
are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited
memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider
buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We
recommend Food 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck, Tech Support
INSTALLING A HUSBAND