spoiler alert: I don't feel like reading all the posts.
My neighbors get a kick out of my Smart Car Washing system. If it's not too cold out when it rains I park in the driveway. After the car is good and wet I put on my raincoat and with a bucket and soapy towel wash my car. The rain does the rinsing. I don't own a hose. I'm saving up for one unless you got one that you are throwing out.
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