Donald Trump's former rivals are lining up at Trump Towers to tell him thanks, but no thanks, not interested in joining you on the ticket. Marco Rubio is the latest one removing himself from consideration.

The obvious and best choice is Newt (the toot) Gingrich. He and Trump are practically interchangeable - both close to 70 years old, both chronically overweight, both now on their third wives. They can discuss the sanctity of third marriages.

Of course there is that matter of the ethics charges that resulted in him losing his speakership.