CONFUCIUS DID NOT SAY....

* Man who wants pretty nurse must be patient.

* Passionate kiss, like spider web, leads to undoing of fly.

* Lady who goes camping with man must beware of evil intent.

* Squirrel who runs up woman's leg will not find nuts.

* Man who leaps off cliff jumps to conclusion.

* Man who runs in front of car gets tired, but man who runs behind car gets exhausted.

* Man who eats many prunes get good run for money.

* War does not determine who is right; it determines who is left.

* Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.

* It takes many nails to build a crib, but only one screw to fill it.

* Man who drives like hell is bound to get there.

* Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.

* Wise man not keep sledge hammer and slow computer in same room.

* Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.

* Man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs.

And, CONFUCIUS DID NOT SAY. . . .

"A lion will not cheat on his wife, but a Tiger Wood!"