[Boomer]

Here is is morning and I am still oh sooooooo stressed over my score. I am telling you, it was truly hideous. I wonder if I would have done better if the words had been spoken for me to write out. Yeah, yeah, that's it. I will pretend that's the case and try to preserve one last shred of dignity.

And about that case of the chubs that's got me. Well, it sure is harder to deal with than my gray hair. For that all I have to do is go to the hairdresser and give her my life savings and she makes it look like it is not dyed.

But the chubs - ohhhhh nooooooo!!!

I have in years past always dealt with Halloween by buying candy that I hated. Starbursts and Skittles come to mind. And kids love Starbursts and Skittles for some odd reason. So anyway, that was always my plan.

Well, the best laid plans and all that....I went to the store on Halloween morning, and I was too late. My plan seems to have caught on. All the candy that I do not like was gone from the shelves.

All that were left were bags of Reese's Cups and Reese's Pieces and Hershey Bars and Kit Kats and all manner of wonderful stuff.

What was a girl to do? Be a Halloween Grinch? So I hauled the glorious stuff home. Hundreds of pieces.

You see, I am one of those women who is always gripped with the fear that I will run out of food for my guests or candy for my trick or treaters. It is a curse. I know. But I worry about these things. My mom always did, too.

Well, wouldn't you know it. This year we did not get very many trick or treaters. We are in a neighborhood with a little distance between the houses. Not a huge amount of distance, but not a subdivision. So I think savvy trick or treaters now must really think about their return on investment of time and steps so they go to the subdivisions.

So I was left with a whole bunch of chocolate. Sitting in my entrance hall. Just sitting there in a shopping bag. Right there on the old church pew I have by the door.

Well, I told Mr. Boomer that I was going to throw the candy away. I know. I know. How wasteful.

But when I looked for it the next morning, to throw it away, yeah, that's it. I really was going to throw it away. Uh huh. Anyway, the chocolate was nowhere to be found.

I thought, "Oh, Mr. Boomer, my knight in shining armor, trying to save me from myself. How wonderful. He always takes such good care of me."

Welllll, as it turned out Mr. Boomer did not throw the candy away. Nope. HE IS HAULING IT AROUND IN THE TRUNK OF HIS CAR!!!!!!

I know. I just hijacked the heck out of this thread to parade my angst over this candy issue.

But today, I am going to throw that candy away. Yep. I am. That's my story and I am sticking to it.

Boomer