Fauci: "New York did it right"
Deaths per million residents:
New York City: 3872
New York State: 1680
Florida: 303
As long as Fauci does not give us any compliments, we should be ok.
Reporter: Boss, Florida's new cases seems to be going down
Editor: No worries, we'll go with new deaths, use the scary charts, not the date of death ones scientists use.
Reporter: But if cases keep going down, won't the deaths come down in a few weeks?
Editor: No worries, we'll go back to scare stories about how schools are dangerous
Reporter: But European schools have been open with no problems, Sweden kept their schools open and had zero deaths under 19, only 53 covid cases per 100k teachers and they can't say they caught it in the classroom.
Editor: We'll keep that under wraps, the virus is different here and the teachers unions will come up with some bogus scare studies and we can promote day care for kids in empty classrooms with adult supervisors which is much safer.
Reporter: Okay then, as long as I keep getting my paycheck. When can I start writing good news stories?
Editor: After November