Have waited before commenting on those who chose to chastise OP about personal care of a 90yo.
First someone who has never taken care of elderly has zero right to criticize.
OP May have a fear of how frail parent is and concerns of doing harm with no idea how to care for parent.
OP may not be able to handle a parent whose weight is more than they can handle.
OPs parent may not be want child or in-law to help with personal issues. (My parents disliked my spouse) Parent maybe so noncompliant that it would cause serious issues. Why because the parent does not think they need help.
Dementia and Alzheimer parents can and will be difficult and not an easy road to walk.
Those who have walked this path have a wealth of information, those who haven’t just have opinions
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