Talk of The Villages Florida - View Single Post - Solo Agers (single & no kids)--how are you planning for live in your 80's & beyond?
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Old 02-11-2024, 08:03 AM
MandoMan MandoMan is offline
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Originally Posted by DaddyD View Post
I (along with a sibling) have been caring for my elderly parents (both late 80's) for the past seven years. While both parents are in reasonably good health for their age, neither can live independently, and were it not for us, both would be (at a minimum) in assisted living facility.

Over the past two years both my mother & father have had illnesses / accidents (falls) which resulted in them being hospitalized. My father was in a local hospital for nearly two weeks, and while the treatment / care he received there was adequate, I shudder to think what his experience would have been like had I not been there daily to manage / advocate for his medical care.

I'm in my 50's, single with no children, and while my "elderly years" are still decades away, this experience of helping my parents has really got me wondering how I'm going to manage the last 10-15 years of my life.

Lots of people mention CCRC's (Continuing Care Retirement Communities), but they won't sit with you at doctor's appointments, help you pay bills, manage your finances, etc..

For those of you who are single with no children:

If you are in the last decade or so of life, how are you doing it? Any tips or warnings?

For those of you in your 60's & 70's, what are your plans for when you aren't able to live independently & need help?
These are good questions to ask. This is why we need what the novelist Kurt Vonnegut (in one of his short stories) calls Ethical Suicide Parlors: local businesses (they could be run by funeral homes) where you make an appointment, are ushered into a quiet, comfortable room, are given pills or an IV or kool-aid or something, and peacefully slip away. I’d love having that available. I live alone, and I’ll probably die alone in my house.

My dad is 95, and we are good friends, but he lives in Denver. My sister lives with him now and makes sure he eats and takes his pills. He can walk around the house with a stick. He’s healthier than some people. He enjoys part of his life, but he is ready to go and wishes he had gone a few years back. He has a Do Not Resuscitate order. Unless he dies in his sleep, though, that last week or month or year will not be pleasant for him.

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