If you must connect, I suggest doing it someplace other then California to make the "long haul" portion of the flight as long as possible. This is the best way to minimize jet lag - sleep on the flight and hit the ground running when you arrive to be in that time zone day one. A connection may also make it possible to fly directly into Maui or Kona (Big Island) which is our preferance over having to go to Oahu and then connect. Unless you want to see Pearl Harbor you don't need to spend much time in Oahu and should focus on the other Islands that are more typical Hawaiian experiences. You can connect in Oahu on the way home and see Pearl Harbor before a very late non-stop return to the mainland as it is very close to the airport.
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