Hi Vinny,
Like Gracie, I wonder whether TV is the best fit for you right now.
Right now, it sounds like you would prefer a bigger house, more land, a fenced yard and quiet, down time when you are not working. You even state that not having a grassed, fenced area would be "a deal killer". As fabulous as TV is, these are not the things TV has to offer. As you said:
Right now I am looking out of my window at the farm that abuts my property. If I look to the other side I see a horse ranch. Our rooms are large and have more of them than two people need. So the factor of buying a smaller home with much less property is an issue that keeps rearing its ugly head. It is hard to go from always having big homes with lots of land to something smaller.
In TV's favor: you love visiting TV, you love the concept, you have a cousin in TV and in-laws nearby and you think you would love living in TV seven years from now. In addition, you stated, "We both have said that if we buy outside of the Villages we will always be thinking that we should have moved to TV".
I hope that if you buy in TV and don't take advantage of the lifesyle, that you won't wish you'd gotten more house and yard. I know that you want this to be your very last move. I get the feeling though, if that one "want" were not an issue, you would go for the bigger house, more land and a fenced yard in a quieter neighborhood and be happy in the knowledge that when you retired, TV might be the place you want to be at that time.
Of course, I could be wrong. I love TV myself and have no qualms at all about it. Then again, I very much want to downsize and love the social life and all the amenities and we will be retired when we move there.
Whatever you decide, please make up your mind to love what you love about it and give no thought to regrets. This might not be a good analogy, but I am reminded of a common situation in golf. Sometimes you have to decide whether to lay up or not, or which is the best approach shot onto the green, or which club to select in a given situation. For all the thought you put into it, sometimes you'd have ended up with the same number of strokes either way. Most of the time, there's only one way that your decision turns into a disaster. And that's to step up to the ball and not trust your shot.