We have recently moved here to TV so we are doing a lot of introductions. I have heard the term "The Wife" more than a few times and in most cases it is not intended as derogatory, but the phrase can understandably be taken that way.
I use: "This is My Wife Kathy" when introducing her or when referring to her in conversation. I suppose a few might even find that offensive, but we cannot please everyone, so I try to please as many as possible.
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