Let's face it - this crap isn't going away, it's only going to get worse, as the airlines think of ways to get more money from the flying public.
I know what you are going through, but for a trip like that, I might just bite the bullet and pay for an extra suitcase or two.
My wife an I do NY - San Diego couple of times a year, and the "fight" for overhead storage space is a PITA, and now they have an order of boarding that could potentially shut you out of storing your luggage overhead.