[redwitch]

For my own reasons, I quit dating a long time ago but always had close male friends (always was more a guy than a gal in my thinking). Sadly, I miss my male buds in California. I've made several female friends but only one male friend. Here, if the guy is single, he seems to think that a friendship includes bedroom activities and he is entitled to it. Um, no! If he's married, his wife seems to have issues with his having a female friend or he's out to cheat. Again, no.

I will admit that being celibate for moral reasons never really entered into my mind set. If I choose to have sex with someone, being married to him is irrelevant. What is relevant is my feeling towards him and his towards me. Love, respect, trust have to be there first. Physical intimacy has to be based on those things. Anything less and I'm scrubbing my skin raw as soon as I can get away from the guy. You can't get that in a few dates. It takes time and work.

So, good luck on finding a guy here who doesn't feel he is entitled to more than you're willing to give. I know they're out there -- I've even met a couple of them. Stay true to yourself.