IMO, I would ask the group, "would anyone else besides me like to share an order (name of appetizer) and expense"? If no interest is expressed then don't share the appetizer. If there is interest, determine how many orders are needed and divide the cost. Something else to consider is whether you all receive one check and divide the cost among you or each couple pays their own bill. I don't see anything wrong with making your thoughts known upfront. After the fact is not only awkward but may create unnecessary problems.
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