There are no written rules for executive courses that are different from USGA rules. The "double par" is a suggestion to help pace of play on the execs when dealing with people new to the game. When our neighborhood groups play, we have team and/or individual matches going. We play out the hole. No picking up after double par unless you are out of the hole. But we have fairly accomplished players who rarely exceed double par.
Regarding the question of the shot into the cord grass, you're right. If the ball is not inside hazard stakes, it should be played as unplayable, not from a drop zone. But, again, this is suggested to maintain pace of play, not for use in an organized match.
Sounds like your golf group needs to decide on some rules for your rounds to make it equitable while still considering pace of play.
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