Siamese twins walk into a bar in Canada, and park themselves on a bar stool. One of them says to the bartender, "Don't mind us; we're joined at the hip. I'm John, he's Jim. Two Molson drafts please." The bartender, feeling slightly awkward, tries to make polite conversation while pouring the beers.
"Been on holiday yet, lads?"
"Off to England next month," says John. "We go to England every year, rent a car, and drive for miles. Don't we, Jim?" Jim agrees.
"Ah, England!" says the bartender. "Wonderful country. The history, the beer, the culture..."
"Nah, we don't like that British crap," says John. "Canadian food and Molson beer, that's us, eh Jim?
"So why keep going to England?" asks the bartender.
"It's the only chance Jim gets to drive."
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ARE VILLAGERS OLD OR ARE THEY RECYCLED TEENAGERS
At my age rolling out of bed in the morning is easy.
Getting up off the floor is another story.
"SMILE... TOMORROW MAY BE EVEN WORSE!"