To look at this a little differently....
I think that if a person's criteria (for friendship) has 'being non judgemental' as first on their list, I would tend to think there is a sensitivity there, a history (or a fear) of being judged themselves. It would tell me more about the person than he/she might know they are revealing. I'd be open to being proved wrong, but they would have to show me.
Any time a list starts with what one DOESN'T want, instead of what pleases them in others, tells me they most often focus on what they don't like. That's usually habitual, in my experience.
Earlier posters gave some very astute observations, and all are factors in that we are all navigating, and trying to FEEL GOOD. Every one of us.
Many of us get hung up on how to perpetuate our 'feeling good' when others won't cooperate the way we want them to, or embrace our 'program'.... and rather than focus on continuing to perpetuate our own feelings, we drop that inner connection, and focus on trying to fix the poor slob so he will think right, or write him off, hold a grudge or worse.
If feeling good, for example, means staying within a tried and true comfort zone, then any challenge to that is uncomfortable. That's where allowing (as was mentioned in an earlier post) is so valuable.... but we must have some measure of self esteem in place to allow others to be, do or have without the need to be inextricably involved.
Common sense judgements, of course are made by us everyday. That's what has helped to perpetuate our species!
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