It seems to me that it would be useful to make a distinction between being judgmental and being observant but allowing. For me the word judgmental implies that I am judging another by my standards and that always gets me in trouble. We can all be observant and have opinions , but when we measure and criticize the action of others against our standards or beliefs, I feel that is judgmental and not conducive to forming good friendships. A healthy debate always livens conversation as long as people can agree to disagree, and that doesn't have to be judgmental. Like one poster said, it does take a certain degree of security about oneself to be able to take a stand in opposition, especially a loud well articulated opposition from someone whom we might view as an authority figure. Staying in a story and looking for a "club" often encourages a judgmental attitude as it forms an "us" vs "others" kind of outlook which makes allowing more difficult I think. Just my 2 cents.
LW888
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"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step" Lao-tzu
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