[senior citizen]

Originally Posted by mrnjp

Some Irish is better than none at all....
Enjoyed... Here's one, hope it passes muster..

An Irishman moves to the USA and finally attends his first baseball game.

The first batter approached the batters' box, took a few swings and then
hits a double. Everyone was on their feet screaming, "Run! Run!"

The next batter hits a single and the Irishman listened as the crowd again
cheered, "RUN, RUN!"

The Irishman enjoyed the game and began screaming with the fans. The fifth
batter came up and four balls went by. The umpire called "walk" and the
batter started his slow trot to first base.

The Irishman stood up and screamed, "R-R-Run ey lazy *******, run!"

The people around him began laughing. Embarrassed, the Irishman sat back
down. A friendly fan noted the man's embarrassment, leaned over and
explained, "He can't run -- he's got four balls."

The Irishman stood up and screamed, "Walk with pride, laddie!"

VERY FUNNY. Here's another one...or two.....or three....

Mary Clancy

Mary Clancy goes up to Father O'Grady after his Sunday morning service and she's in tears.

He says, "So what's bothering you, Mary, my dear?"

She says, "Oh, Father, I've got terrible news. My husband passed away last night."

The priest says, "Oh, Mary, that's terrible. Tell me, Mary, did he have any last requests?"

She says, "That he did, Father."

The priest says, "What did he ask, Mary?"

She says, "He said, please Mary, put down that damn gun..."

************************************************** *******************************************

Pat And Mike

Pat and Mike had been drinking buddies and friends for years.

After having a few drinks in a bar, Mike said to Pat -
"We have been friends for years and years and if I should die before you do would you do me a favor? Get the best bottle of Irish whiskey you can find and pour it over my grave."

Pat replied, "I would be glad to do that for you my old friend.
But would you mind if I passed it through my bladder first?"
************************************************** ****************
Live Long

Three Irishmen, Paddy, Sean and Shamus, having left the pub a wee bit late
one night, found themselves on the road which led past the old graveyard.

"Come have a look over here," says Paddy, "it's Michael O'Grady's grave,
God bless his soul. He lived to the ripe old age of 87. Good blood,
those O'Gradys!"

"That's nothing," says Sean. "Here's one named Patrick O'Toole, it says here that
he was 95 when he died. Aye, those O'Tooles are a hardy bunch, they are!"

Just then, Shamus yells out, "Forget him, here's a fella that lived to
be 145 years old!"

"What was his name?" ask Paddy & Sean.

Shamus stumbles around a bit, awkwardly lights a match to see what else
is written on the stone marker, and exclaims, "Miles..."

"Miles who?" ask Paddy & Sean

"To Dublin