Talk of The Villages Florida - View Single Post - Be sure last wishes are followed!
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Old 04-17-2013, 03:30 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ilovetv View Post
Not disagreeing at all about the first post. But about this, I wonder:

"She was with her daughter and grandson, whom she adored".....

Should the daughter have taken the grandson out of school in Hawaii, to move here to FL for an unknown amount of time so she could have her closest loved ones with her, till the lady eventually died?

Should the daughter have left the mom here in hospice/skilled nursing till she died without her daughter and grandson whom she adored?

Without knowing how many months away from death the mother was, could the daughter afford airline flights to and from Hawaii--uknown number of times--if she got accommodations for her mom here?

When the daughter moved the mother to Hawaii, she did not know how long she might live, and no mortal has any way of knowing whether the trip hastened her death any more than if she had stayed here.
There are no easy answers but the reality is that my friend wanted to die in her home with her friends. She was content with her daughter and grandson coming for a farewell visit if they wished and then returning for the funeral (she had enough funds for them to do this). As I said, she felt kidnapped and there is no doubt the trip hastened her death -- something everyone knew and tried to explain to the daughter. Jean had the funds for someone to stay with 24/7 until long-term disability kicked in or she died, whichever came first.

I understand why her daughter did this and, as I said, there was nothing malicious in the actions, but it was not what my friend wanted and that is what should have come first, not what her daughter wanted or what was easier for her daughter.

Love the death book and am in the process of making one for my daughter to follow.

My point in posting this was just to remind all of us to be sure we know what we want and that our wishes are followed to the best of everyone's abilities.
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