Quote:
Originally Posted by olgreeneyes
My father's ashes went into the ocean, my godparents are in a river in upstate NY, my mother we took down to Atlantic City in the ocean. My grandmother put my grandfather's ashes in her rose bushes on Long Island, however, she moved away and when she passed, I couldn't see us asking strangers if I could put her ashes in the rose bush with her husband, so we put her in our rose bushes. Even one of our dogs ashes are in the backyard, so it will be cremation for us also. The idea of making a vacation out of it for whom ever has to dispose of them sounds like a great way to make it a happy memory.
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Every single response has been wonderful to read....... I can't reply to every single one......but I thank all for their thoughts......cremation seems to be leading so far........it's what I've been thinking of myself.
So, firstly, thanks to everyone............
But your post about the ashes in the rose bush reminded me of a dear neighbor of ours whose elderly sister (he was elderly also) had put her own husband's ashes (in some type of disposable box) outside on her back steps. She was in early stage Alzheimers at the time.
Unbeknownst to her.......the garbage men picked it up, thinking it was part of her weekly garbage load......being just a plain nondescript box.
Goodbye HUBBY..........guess he ended up in the landfill.
There was no way to trace it as our garbage trucks GRIND UP the stuff they pick up.
Luckily, I do believe in the spirit.......and I know for a fact that the spirit lives on.......much happier without it's diseased body. Lighter and freer.
So, survival of the spirit is what's important......I guess; not the burying spot.
We watched something on Public Television yesterday about an embalmer who owned a funeral home in N.Y.C........he did a beautiful, loving makeover on his elderly "clients".........but I do think that business is on its way out. They also showed a mortician in the south, again devoted to his "clientele"........but just watching the corpses in the coffins primped and made up.........which brings me to another question....{what else is new?}
If you are going to be cremated.........is that with NO CALLING HOURS?
Meaning, "no viewing" at all by the family?
Sometimes, these funeral directors will talk people into having the viewing hours and then in some states you still have to purchase the coffin in which you are cremated??? With no viewing hours, that would not be an issue.
We're watching all the re runs of THE SOPRANOS.......and they sure did go to a lot of funerals........just as my grandmothers and the elders did.......
it was very social back in those days......however, not everyone lives around the corner from each other anymore.........and with folks all over the country and all over the world, as another poster mentioned, just travel to the funeral can be difficult.........cremation is simpler.
I agree with those who said, "Let them have their memories of me while alive and the good times we shared"....
I'm paraphrasing.....
In other words, rather than their last memory being of us in our coffin.