An interesting piece on Slate
Advice for men: How do you refer to a gentleman whose name you don’t know? - Slate Magazine
leads me to seek your input. The gentleman scholar who penned this piece was responding to a query from a man who was irked at a store clerk using the term "young man" when he obviously is not a young man. Even better than the piece are the comments. I was surprised that most women preferred "ma'am" to miss or ms.
A typical comment was this one:
"I'm 58 and have been married for 30+ years. Lately I've noticed a trend of younger people in stores, restaurants, etc. calling me "Miss" and I find it unnerving. Yes, it's kind of strange when people start calling you ma'am, but I got used to it in my late 20s, and I am so far from being a Miss now that it almost feels like they're ridiculing me"
We have plenty of servers and clerks who face this dilemma. What do you prefer to be used and what makes you unhappy? I found it strange that I have been called "baby" twice in the past week by 20-something servers. I bit my tongue and did not reply with a "mama" back at them.