Gomoho: Your family is obeying the law, which is exactly what people are supposed to do. Best wishes to both in this long process; and yes, they could have come over on a Fiance Visa and married within 90 days, then started the process.
Bare: As long as your mother was an American, you can claim your rights and apply for an American passport...Dual citizenship. Maybe that could help to solve your problem a bit.
Again, the time for both parties to begin the talking was Yesterday, because now there isn't a moment to spare - it is becoming worse and with no end in sight. Sick of this Congress!
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