We thought my Dad was doing very well until the day he went through a stop sign without stopping, causing another car to hit him. It was his fault. He didn't even stop, but went to park, and the driver followed him. He had forgotten he needed to stop. My dad was always intelligent and very sharp-always did the right thing. But he had forgotten what the "right thing" was. We spent almost every day with him for hours, and he was still able to hide the fact that he was not safe to drive. MY Mom kinda didn't tell us everything either where he was concerned-not to cause problems, but I think she was in denial also. I admit, he fooled us, and both my hubby and I had jobs where you had to evaluate people and their action-both mentally and physically. But it is hard to see something you don't want to see, and of course I wanted my Dad to always be the way he had always been. He was driving well, getting around safely, or so we thought. We also discovered that he had let his car insurance run out. That was all it took. We took the keys away from him that day. Fortunately my Mom reminded us that he had another key hidden. She was supportive of us taking the car-she was still mentally sharp, but had emphysema, and couldn't get around very well. They both were in assistive living at this time. My Dad was furious at us, saying we were stealing his car, etc. We told him as soon as he got insurance on the car, he could have it back. He wasn't even able to figure out how to do that. He never got his car back. My point after all of this is that it was one of the hardest, but most loving thing I could do for him. He was mad, but quickly forgave/forgot about it, and I made sure that he would not be hurt, nor would he ever hurt someone else. If I had let him drive under those conditions, and something had happened, it would make me just as guilty as him. You might not agree with that, but as people age physically, but regress mentally, they are not qualified to make ration decisions, and if you have power of attorney, you agreed to make hard decisions that are in their best interest. It is hard to take the keys away, but sometimes you have to just do the right thing.
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