Neither of us came from large families and we are almost the oldest generation. His 85 year old mother does not need another trinket and we send fruit, flowers, and edible items staggered throughout the month, 12 months per year. She is constantly getting packages.
Our children and children in laws get a check. But, during the year we will pick things up we know they need/want and give it to them "just because". The gifts they receive from their inlaws are always returned, the inlaws are hurt, and it is a vicious cycle. Not our cup of tea. Check may be impersonal, but they sure do appreciate them.
Our grandchildren are young and we give them an inexpensive gift to unwrap. In July we take them for a week long trip. August is family week at the beach with their parents, cousins, aunts, and uncles. Thanksgiving is Busch Gardens for their Christmas theme and we do a long weekend in Williamsburg.
For us, it is less about things and more about experiences we share as a family. This works for us.
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