Loving and Living Together

[buggyone]

I have seen posts from others regarding their views on marriage and how they believe it has fallen from when they were younger.

I personally know some Villagers who love each other very much and live together but are not married. These are for financial reasons of losing a survivor pension or other financial reason.

A couple of these people have even had a ring exchange but not married.

I think this is wonderful these people have found love again and are a committed couple - even without a legality of marriage.

What are some other thoughts on this?

[graciegirl]

This is such an emotional topic for some of us. Along with ethical and religious and sacred and treasured and valued.




OH for Pete's sake. I thought it was golfing nut introducing one of his ....makes you think about it threads. Sorry Buggy.

[Bucco]

I was reading another thread and the OP of that stated nowadays marriage means nothing.

I personally know some Villagers who love each other very much and live together but are not married. These are for financial reasons of losing a survivor pension or other financial reason.

A couple of these people have even had a ring exchange but not married.

I think this is wonderful these people have found love again and are a committed couple - even without a legality of marriage.

What are some other thoughts on this?

I must object to your using something from a post of mine and twisting into something that was not meant or implied. That is not fair.

[KathieI]

I was reading another thread and the OP of that stated nowadays marriage means nothing.

I personally know some Villagers who love each other very much and live together but are not married. These are for financial reasons of losing a survivor pension or other financial reason.

A couple of these people have even had a ring exchange but not married.

I think this is wonderful these people have found love again and are a committed couple - even without a legality of marriage.

What are some other thoughts on this?

I know a few couples who are in this situation, and I think at our age, it is absolutely wonderful. If companionship is so important to you, and I know many people feel they want that, then more power to them and we are so lucky to live in such a place where that happiness can be found.

[graciegirl]

I have been reading Bucco's posts for long enough to know that he is a deep, thoughtful, caring, smart and ethical man.
I have been reading Buggyones' post for long enough to know that he is a deep, thoughtful, caring , smart and ethical man.


Do you want to talk about love and how in the throes of it we make some gooney choices? Do you want to talk about living together for comfort and to avoid legal problems for heirs? Do you want to talk about how times have changed? Do you want to talk about how we feel about cohabitation and how popular it is? I am for anything for young people that will make a life long commitment possible so that there is a chance for a family to be raised by two people who love them in the same home it that is possible. I realize that a lot of people marry more than once. I am just very lucky to have found my love before somebody else grabbed him..


Marriage to me is beautiful and sacred and I am so fortunate in mine and I will tell you right now that if Sweetie was married to someone else I would try to break up their marriage and take him away. I wish for everyone that kind of love.

[DougB]

I could care less who lives with who and why. None of my business.

[CFrance]

At our ages, I care about who loves whom (is that right???) and how they can make that happen with the least amount of complication.

I said to my 20-year-olds, I hope you get married and not just live with someone. I would say to my 65+-year-old friends, I hope you find love, companionship, and happiness in the most financially feasible way possible. If that means you can't get married, so be it.

[Bucco]

Once more, the OP of this thread is referring to my thread on marijuana, and took what I said totally out of context.

The subject matter of this thread, in no way, can be tied to my post.

Of course finding love at any age is wonderful...I cannot imagine a single person objecting

[rubicon]

My opening here is to explain that my wife was my first love, my greatest love and she will be my last love. My daughter once said to us we made marriage look easy". I was taken aback by that because the reality is as we all know not so. But we believed our peaks and valleys were ours and not to be a burden to others. We believed in our commitment and our promises to each other and we understood the importance of subordinated ourselves to one another and the responsibility we owed toourselves and our children.

I strongly believe marriage as a unit and linked from family to family creates the strong fabric for this country.

I strongly believe that the obsessive rights movements of the 60's destroyed that concept and today there is little resemblance of what marriage requires.
It is impossible to go back and it is having a devasting effect on our children and this country

[CFrance]

Once more, the OP of this thread is referring to my thread on marijuana, and took what I said totally out of context.

The subject matter of this thread, in no way, can be tied to my post.

Of course finding love at any age is wonderful...I cannot imagine a single person objecting

Bucco, I personally did not remember your original post and don't ascribe that statement about marriage to your personal feeling. I think I know you better (even though we've never met) through your posts. I was only commenting on the topic of marriage later in life.

Buggy may have been using a part of your comment in the marijuana thread as a springboard for a different discussion about marriage. I'm not sure... but he seems like a pretty fair person, as do you. JMO

[Bucco]

My opening here is to explain that my wife was my first love, my greatest love and she will be my last love. My daughter once said to us we made marriage look easy". I was taken aback by that because the reality is as we all know not so. But we believed our peaks and valleys were ours and not to be a burden to others. We believed in our commitment and our promises to each other and we understood the importance of subordinated ourselves to one another and the responsibility we owed toourselves and our children.

I strongly believe marriage as a unit and linked from family to family creates the strong fabric for this country.

I strongly believe that the obsessive rights movements of the 60's destroyed that concept and today there is little resemblance of what marriage requires.
It is impossible to go back and it is having a devasting effect on our children and this country

We are two things. We are called lucky...I have 51 years of marriage and gets better each day.

Second thing we are called is old fashioned....I am not sure what the OP was driving at here.....I cannot imagine anyone opposed to love.....I cannot imagine anyone opposed to marriage (if possible). If the OP is looking to see if anyone will condemn those who, for one reason or another, live together....he won't find any for sure either.

[buggyone]

Bucco, I personally did not remember your original post and don't ascribe that statement about marriage to your personal feeling. I think I know you better (even though we've never met) through your posts. I was only commenting on the topic of marriage later in life.

Buggy may have been using a part of your comment in the marijuana thread as a springboard for a different discussion about marriage. I'm not sure... but he seems like a pretty fair person, as do you. JMO

Thank you, CFrance. I meant nothing negative to Bucco and, like you say, springboarded into a different topic.

[Bucco]

Thank you, CFrance. I meant nothing negative to Bucco and, like you say, springboarded into a different topic.

I am fine..he modified the first post and that takes care of it

[2BNTV]

Marriage is very beautiful when two people love each other deeply, and are faithful and committed to the santity of marriage.

Some older people have been burned in marriage, and want to co-habitate due to financial issues and that may be right for them. Not all marriages were wonderful.

Young couples who cohabitate is fine until children come along. I believe people should get married, so a social stigma, is not attached to the children.

Whether to be married or not is a very personal decision, based on many factors, but the two people should really love each other.

Who's to say what is right or wrong? These are all individividual cases.

Eveeryone owes it to themselves to make themselves happy.

As the Beatles said, "LET IT BE".

[patfla06]

I believe in marriage and don't like young couples opting out of
making that commitment.

At our age, however, I feel the opposite. Whatever we have
accumulated financially many of us want to leave to our
Children.

I respect what people decide is right for them.

[rubicon]

We are two things. We are called lucky...I have 51 years of marriage and gets better each day.

Second thing we are called is old fashioned....I am not sure what the OP was driving at here.....I cannot imagine anyone opposed to love.....I cannot imagine anyone opposed to marriage (if possible). If the OP is looking to see if anyone will condemn those who, for one reason or another, live together....he won't find any for sure either.

Bucco: I am heading for my 52nd this summer. In my earlier post I stated she would be my last love. I made that statement because in my view she is the only woman I said Ï love you, to". To remarry, etc in my minds eye is betrayal of that statement and to do otherwise means my life has been a lie
and I have always been honest with myself and with others. I am a naturalist, a purist, a loyalist and a bit of a romantic but I always default to being balanced.

Your posts tell me you and I think a lot alike about many issues and I for one appreciate the company because all around me all I am seeing and hearing lately are absurdities

[memason]

Isn't marriage just a legal thing?

Commitment comes in many forms...

Just an opinion

[Finallyfree]

Totally agree, heading to #47 this year. Hubby has been the light of my life since we were teenagers. Hard work and commitment make it work and as our girls say, look easy.

Having said that we know older couples where marriage would cause a financial hardship due to loss of pension of spouse, etc. so on that I am live and let live, we all have to decide on and live with the decisions we make in this life.

[rubicon]

Isn't marriage just a legal thing?

Commitment comes in many forms...

Just an opinion

Hi memason: I do understand your rationale. However, at first blush yes but think about the fine line between commitment and commitment by marriage. To me its the difference between a fair weather golfer and a dedicated lover of the sport.

And that legal thing has certainly created an uproar all over the world by the gay community

Personal Best Regard:

[In awe of TV]

At our ages, I care about who loves whom (is that right???) and how they can make that happen with the least amount of complication.

I said to my 20-year-olds, I hope you get married and not just live with someone. I would say to my 65+-year-old friends, I hope you find love, companionship, and happiness in the most financially feasible way possible. If that means you can't get married, so be it.

BINGO! Exactly how I feel. When you are young and want a family - I think marriage is an important bond.

For people who have been through and lived that, now marriage is not that important to me. It's the loving bond that counts. Also sometimes financially it's better not to be married.

[buggyone]

Hi memason: I do understand your rationale. However, at first blush yes but think about the fine line between commitment and commitment by marriage. To me its the difference between a fair weather golfer and a dedicated lover of the sport.

And that legal thing has certainly created an uproar all over the world by the gay community

Personal Best Regard:

I do not understand your second paragraph. Shouldn't gay and lesbian couples have the same protection under the law as straight couples, i.e. legal marriage?

It does stray from the intent of the post but I know there are such couples in The Villages.