My sincere and abject apologies

[redwitch]

It's amazing what a difference slang terms make and mean in different parts of the country. With my friends in California, if we say we're hooking up or going out to hook up, we mean we're dating or looking for someone to date. None of my friends ever used it to mean they were looking for a one-night stand. Someone informed me that hooking up meant getting together for sex. To say that I was heartsick that people thought I was saying that when I truly meant something much more innocent is putting it mildly.

Now, before I get to my apology, I do want to make it patently clear that there is nothing wrong with going to parties and the like in the hopes of meeting your lifemate. I was just under the impression that TOTV's single parties were really meant for singles to get together. So, when I started seeing comments about on-line date sites and dating, I got very uncomfortable. (And it really was none of my business, anyway, and I should have just kept quiet about it.)

So, my sincere and abject apologies. I never, ever meant to imply anyone was out to do anything even remotely sleazy and I am so very, very sorry if I hurt anyone's feelings. I hope you all can forgive me.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

[graciegirl]

It's amazing what a difference slang terms make and mean in different parts of the country. With my friends in California, if we say we're hooking up or going out to hook up, we mean we're dating or looking for someone to date. None of my friends ever used it to mean they were looking for a one-night stand. Someone informed me that hooking up meant getting together for sex. To say that I was heartsick that people thought I was saying that when I truly meant something much more innocent is putting it mildly.

Now, before I get to my apology, I do want to make it patently clear that there is nothing wrong with going to parties and the like in the hopes of meeting your lifemate. I was just under the impression that TOTV's single parties were really meant for singles to get together. So, when I started seeing comments about on-line date sites and dating, I got very uncomfortable. (And it really was none of my business, anyway, and I should have just kept quiet about it.)

So, my sincere and abject apologies. I never, ever meant to imply anyone was out to do anything even remotely sleazy and I am so very, very sorry if I hurt anyone's feelings. I hope you all can forgive me.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.




PLEASE don't feel bad. You know and have told me how people get the wrong impression when they read things. I would be so sad if you were troubled by a misinterpretation. Some people just want to see bad and others see only good. Thank God you are one of the people who see good in me.


Hugs and love to you Dee.

[quirky3]

Dear Red, it is a sincere misunderstanding - what a difference a definition makes! Thank you so much for your response. Based on your definition, I completely understand and agree with your postings. So glad we were able to clear this up!

[rubicon]

Redwitch: In my view in this day and age of casual this and casual that I wager no one even noticed except you. I mean between movies and the music entertainment industry how much more can we be shocked

[KathieI]

After I read your comment, Dee, I didn't see anything objectionable about it either. I thought it was meant about dating, nothing more. It is the written word taken out of context or out of one's own understanding of the meaning of a word that causes a problem on forums and emails and texts.. Guess this is the age we live in and we will need to get thicker skin or learn to apologize for the misunderstanding. Good post, thank you!

[tainsley]

I think everyone who has read any of your posts over the years or met you in person know what a kind woman you are Dee!

[Madelaine Amee]

I think everyone who has read any of your posts over the years or met you in person know what a kind woman you are Dee!

:) Totally agree 100% ......................

[eweissenbach]

I think everyone who has read any of your posts over the years or met you in person know what a kind woman you are Dee!

True dat!

[lovsthosebigdogs]

I think everyone who has read any of your posts over the years or met you in person know what a kind woman you are Dee!

I'm another person in agreement. So easy to misunderstand what we read. That's why it's always easier to assume people meant well (at least that's how I think it should be)!

[2BNTV]

To err is human, to forgive is devine.

No problemo!!!!

BTW - The printed word can be misconstured. It happens several times on this forum with not good results. :smiley:

[kittygilchrist]

Dee, I know you and that you weren't ever trying to be mean to anybody, cuz you're just too kind. It was a misunderstanding, and it happens all the time to the best people.
Kitty

[Taltarzac725]

I think I made the same kind of mistake when I wrote that I had hooked up with a University of Denver Graduate School of Librarianship and Information Management alumna-- Cheryl-- back in 1986 or so while I worked at Information Access Company. This was just a lunch date and she brought another girl friend along. https://www.talkofthevillages.com/forums/844669-post4.html I believe my old friend was just getting a read on her girlfriend's take on whether or not Cheryl had picked the right roommate to date back when we lived in Denver. She had dated one of my other roommates rather than me. I had been busy chasing the girl next door from when I was nine and younger--Jean-- who had moved from the Milwaukee area to Denver and planned to attend library school at the University of Wisconsin-Madison.

[chachacha]

as far as i am concerned, dee, your apology is accepted and appreciated...the term "hook up" was very offensive to most of us as there is always this aura of mystery about the single life among those who are not single and it gets romanticized far more than it really is, believe me! especially to new people coming in, who have not seen your insightful and intelligent posts on other topics, this was just a bad choice of words....i still would be delighted to have you attend one of our functions, maybe sitting on the porch of LSL on thursday night, april 3, to welcome newcomers.

[karengfw]

It's amazing what a difference slang terms make and mean in different parts of the country. With my friends in California, if we say we're hooking up or going out to hook up, we mean we're dating or looking for someone to date. None of my friends ever used it to mean they were looking for a one-night stand. Someone informed me that hooking up meant getting together for sex. To say that I was heartsick that people thought I was saying that when I truly meant something much more innocent is putting it mildly.

Now, before I get to my apology, I do want to make it patently clear that there is nothing wrong with going to parties and the like in the hopes of meeting your lifemate. I was just under the impression that TOTV's single parties were really meant for singles to get together. So, when I started seeing comments about on-line date sites and dating, I got very uncomfortable. (And it really was none of my business, anyway, and I should have just kept quiet about it.)

So, my sincere and abject apologies. I never, ever meant to imply anyone was out to do anything even remotely sleazy and I am so very, very sorry if I hurt anyone's feelings. I hope you all can forgive me.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

Dear Dee(redwitch?) I want to send you a very special reply and apology, as I was clearly the person who took offense to your comment. I was SO surprised that others noticed and sure wish I hadn't even posted anything in haste. I am not a regular TOTV'r usually, tho have been more so lately finding more friends here. Thus, I didn't know you from other posters, as this seems almost a blind board with very few people identifying themselves in their name, profile or photo (unlike me, who is an open book). That said, I'd love to meet a nice guy to date occasionally, maybe fall in love again, tho I am not waiting around or lowering my standards for that, but I can see why you might have used a term that many of us find offensive without realizing it. I still remember my mom being super offended with the term "make out" which I only used to indicate kissing and she thought was having sex. GEEZ! So please let's just giggle this off and move on. Have a nice St.Patrick's Day in spite of the horrible rain (which has definately changed MY plans).

[redwitch]

Karen, thank you. I honestly couldn't figure out why you were so upset about my hooking up comment until I was told what the interpretation was. I was truly upset that I had inadvertently hurt you and I'm so glad you understand and accept my apology. And, yes, it will definitely be a good giggle thing when we do meet.

[graciegirl]

Definition of hook up (v)

Bing Dictionary


hook up



connect electronic devices: to set up or connect electronic or electric devices
get together: to meet and become associated, or cause somebody to meet and become associated, with somebody else

[2BNTV]

Definition of hook up (v)

Bing Dictionary


hook up



connect electronic devices: to set up or connect electronic or electric devices
get together: to meet and become associated, or cause somebody to meet and become associated, with somebody else


I am very familiar with the first hook-up as was a prototype technician for part of my career, and use to build cicuit boards.

Where I came from from, hook-up had a bad conotation, of not only meeting but becoming intimate.

I am so glad this misunderstanding is resolved, as Red is a good person, and meant no harm.

No blood, no foul, as they used to say in the NBA. :D

[kittygilchrist]

Definition of hook up (v)

Bing Dictionary


hook up



connect electronic devices: to set up or connect electronic or electric devices
get together: to meet and become associated, or cause somebody to meet and become associated, with somebody else


Here's a journal article for inquiring minds...researcher's definition:

"In the literature, hook-up culture is defined as casual sexual
contact between nondating partners without an (expressed
or acknowledged) expectation of forming a committed
relationship (Armstrong et al. 2009; Bogle 2008; Flack et
al. 2006; Garcia and Reiber 2008; Paul et al. 2000; Paul
2006). The typical hook up occurs at a party (Bogle 2007a)."

http://lisawadedotcom.files.wordpress.com/2011/02/heldman-wade-2010-hook-up-culture-setting-a-new-research-agenda.pdf

[Taltarzac725]

Here's a journal article for inquiring minds...researcher's definition:

"In the literature, hook-up culture is defined as casual sexual
contact between nondating partners without an (expressed
or acknowledged) expectation of forming a committed
relationship (Armstrong et al. 2009; Bogle 2008; Flack et
al. 2006; Garcia and Reiber 2008; Paul et al. 2000; Paul
2006). The typical hook up occurs at a party (Bogle 2007a)."

http://lisawadedotcom.files.wordpress.com/2011/02/heldman-wade-2010-hook-up-culture-setting-a-new-research-agenda.pdf

I doubt if many swingers use TOTV as there would be much more easier routes to go. I am not hip to these places in the Villages, but the swinging crowd would probably know just where to head. i.e., which bars and when.

[TheVillageChicken]

To lighten things up, I present the world's greatest apology from "A Fish Named Wanda." Sorry if there is an ad at the beginning.

Youtube

[kittygilchrist]

the funniest part is to read Tal's post about swingers and hip, then view the ridiculosity of this video...language is fickle and shows up willy nilly as friend or foe. Oh my, don't leave out the hypen. hook-up.

America's culture has devolved so that the word hook-up doesn't mean what it used to.

[bkcunningham1]

to lighten things up, i present the world's greatest apology from "a fish named wanda." sorry if there is an ad at the beginning.

youtube (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kniundvzvh4)

lol You must be hooked up with someone to find a video pertaining to the topic that quickly. ;~)