What is the purpose?

[shcisamax]

Initially when I became a visitor to this forum, it was because I was moving here and I wanted to try to learn about the environment and what TV had to offer, who the good contractors were, how to build the house, etc. I actually had no idea people who didn't live here and never had were participating and giving advice.

So my question is why do people that don't live here participate? And I guess more to the point is why do they participate in a way that is condescending and supercilious towards people that do live here. I don't think they would like it if people on TOTV started putting down their hometown. Nobody is without skeletons.

[KathieI]

Initially when I became a visitor to this forum, it was because I was moving here and I wanted to try to learn about the environment and what TV had to offer, who the good contractors were, how to build the house, etc. I actually had no idea people who didn't live here and never had were participating and giving advice.

So my question is why do people that don't live here participate? And I guess more to the point is why do they participate in a way that is condescending and supercilious towards people that do live here. I don't think they would like it if people on TOTV started putting down their hometown. Nobody is without skeletons.

Agree,,, when I joined TOTV, it also was to learn all about The Villages with the intent to MOVE HERE!!! Many of us didn't live here at the time and we were all learning and asking questions relevant to our moves. Don't understand why people who have no intention of living here or even thinking of living here would be offering their advice on things they know nothing about.

[TV MAN]

I'm with you KathieI.

[pooh]

People join message boards for many reasons. Both of you joined to find out about the community. I joined after arriving here.

Readers get to "know" others by their writing style and seem to enjoy the personalities of the members. After a while, they become a part of your life.

While there are some who might find it acceptable to be disrespectful of others and the community they are not a part of, not all who live elsewhere do this.

People mock what they fear, what they feel will make them look better than others or what they might see in themselves.

I love this community, both the physical community with it's beauty and wonderful people as well as the cyber community. Those whose opinions differ so much from ours do get us to thinking...and expressing...a little bit of stress keeps the mind working...;)

[perrjojo]

Initially when I became a visitor to this forum, it was because I was moving here and I wanted to try to learn about the environment and what TV had to offer, who the good contractors were, how to build the house, etc. I actually had no idea people who didn't live here and never had were participating and giving advice.

So my question is why do people that don't live here participate? And I guess more to the point is why do they participate in a way that is condescending and supercilious towards people that do live here. I don't think they would like it if people on TOTV started putting down their hometown. Nobody is without skeletons.

I wonder the same. I guess they are bored with their life and have too much time on their hands so they are busy tearing down active, happy people with fun, full lives. Honestly some of the "research" they do must take hours.

[ladylake1]

I'm with you KathieI.

Me too!!!!!!!!! Glad someone finally addressed this.

[Bogie Shooter]

There are only a few and we all who the biggest offender is.....................

[2BNTV]

I had a friend, (passed away), that moved to TV, and kept inviting me down to his home. I finally visited several years ago, and was blown away by the beauty of TV and it's wonderful people. It's not perfect but it's about as close as you can get. No one and nothing is perfect in life!

I was totally unaware this site existed when I visited. When I did join this forum, I found it to be very comforting to know people really cared about one another, and made close friends. Being single, I have friends that are married, as well as single. I value all of them.

TOTV has been invaluable, in getting to know what contractors to use, and knowing where to go, to find what you are looking for. I don't use contractors, unless a trusted friend recommends them. So far, it has worked out, splendidly!!! I have saved a ton of money by listening to my trusted friends, and saved myself a lot of heartache. I not sure if I would have ever moved here if two of my friends didn't encourage me, when I thought it wouldn't happen for me.

"People criticize what they don't understand". I feel sorry for those who take to a bulletin board, just to dispute what others are saying, without having any first hand knowledge. It makes me wonder, "why even go there"!!!! Don't you have something more constructive to do, with your life?

We all have our moral standards. Mine is. "if you want to have a good time and be nice to one another, then I'm your man". If not, please stay home and be miserable by yourself.

I never understood the concept of, "I must knock you down, to lift myself up".

"If you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say it".

Off soapbox.

[rubicon]

I view this question from a different point of view and it all comes down to defining terms and remembering of the absence of body language with this media. Set aside the obvious"/direct offense such as ÿour a jerk" and perhaps that person is advancing a position with which other disagree. so one can conclude that they disagree but it doesn't make the person writing disagreeable.

Second I seldom search for agreement but seek attempting to understand a person's position.

Third we are all entitled to our opinions but we are not entitled to our own facts.

Fourth sometimes outsiders see clearer than those closest to a situation/problem/issue.

Fifth and the most important to me is that my over-riding goal is to do right and not to always be right. to me learning cannot truly be attained unless we let go of our ego and hence our biases. Certainly it can not always be accomplished but a good faith effort every time will yield better results

[dewilson58]

Maybe they are jealous &/or unhappy. Since they can not be here, they want to try to make the bubble-people miserable.

:pepper2::pepper2:

[CFrance]

I am tired of the few people on here, who don't live here and have made it a very long point to let everyone know they don't intend to move here, who nonetheless hang on and bring up every negative point about The Villages and its occupants, complete with with lectures and copying and pasting. And also the few "you're a jerk"- type people who live here but hate TV, or don't live here but push their nastiness in everyone's face through sarcasm and name calling.

I hope I have covered them all. Thank you to Schisamax for bringing up this elephant in the room--or on the forum, as it were.

This thread may get canceled by Admin, but enough is enough, and we really need a chance to have our say.

[shcisamax]

I hadn't thought about it from the point of view that these people have no great life of their own but the expression "Misery loves company" now comes to mind. I am sorry people are so unhappy in their own place and life that they feel they need to put others down. Very sad. There are support groups everywhere and they need to find a support group in their home town to deal with their anger and unhappiness.

[Average Guy]

I am tired of the few people on here, who don't live here and have made it a very long point to let everyone know they don't intend to move here, who nonetheless hang on and bring up every negative point about The Villages and its occupants, complete with with lectures and copying and pasting. And also the few "you're a jerk"- type people who live here but hate TV, or don't live here but push their nastiness in everyone's face through sarcasm and name calling.

I hope I have covered them all. Thank you to Schisamax for bringing up this elephant in the room--or on the forum, as it were.

This thread may get canceled by Admin, but enough is enough, and we really need a chance to have our say.


:agree::agree::agree::agree:

Thanks for posting exactly what I was thinking.

[keywest]

I am tired of the few people on here, who don't live here and have made it a very long point to let everyone know they don't intend to move here, who nonetheless hang on and bring up every negative point about The Villages and its occupants, complete with with lectures and copying and pasting. And also the few "you're a jerk"- type people who live here but hate TV, or don't live here but push their nastiness in everyone's face through sarcasm and name calling.

I hope I have covered them all. Thank you to Schisamax for bringing up this elephant in the room--or on the forum, as it were.

This thread may get canceled by Admin, but enough is enough, and we really need a chance to have our say.

Yes, I agree CFrance and since we know who some of them are ... Why
Not just ignore all their many posts and just plain not answer their posts?

[Allegiance]

Everyone has a reason to be here, even those that dont live or intend to live here.

- some people could be bored, maybe they were barred from other forums, these people need a life.

- some people use forums to sway customers their way or to stay business away from competitors. i.e., if you were selling real estate in a competing development, you might try to portray The Villages as something other than "Lovely."

I always thought forums should give members the ability to get "certified" status. To gain that status you would have to meet an established member, like Gracegirl, maybe buy her a drink and you get "certified" that you are who you say you are.

[perrjojo]

Yes, I agree CFrance and since we know who some of them are ... Why
Not just ignore all their many posts and just plain not answer their posts?
I agree!:agree:
Just do not reply to their posts and hopefully they will go away.

[graciegirl]

I know one thing. AND I mean it most sincerely. I grow to love my TOTV friends more every day and my first reaction has almost always been accurate.

I know how important it was to us, when KathieI and Village07 went out of their way to schedule a "meet and greet" and to stop by our rental home for a face to face visit and a hug when we came on our Lifestyle visit...about seven years ago..

Since then we have met so many wonderful people through TOTV and some feel like family to us. We can't all be perfect fits for each other and one cannot expect to be in sinc with everyone but we all float toward those who feel comfortable and right for us. This place has been the launching pad for some wonderful times and some heated debates too. We get older and more sure that the way we look at things is the right way and if we don't try to understand where another person is coming from, we close a lot of doors. That said, a snake and a mouse can't usually get along for an extended length of time. Or a bee and a bird or many dogs and cats. But if we look at all the things we hold common, all the hard work and the heart breaking things as well as the victories that got us to this place and time of life, we could do a little better job of .....being a little more peaceful, a little more polite, a little more accepting and a little kinder. Sometimes we act like the Hatfields and the McCoys.

That said. If this place is not the place for you, please don't move here and please don't start quarrels with us people who love it here.

Two of my MOST treasured friends here are not any way near the same political or religious persuasion as I am and we are relaxed and happy in each others presence and we get together frequently. We don't have to agree, we just have to care.

[Chi-Town]

Everyone has a reason to be here, even those that dont live or intend to live here.

- some people could be bored, maybe they were barred from other forums, these people need a life.

- some people use forums to sway customers their way or to stay business away from competitors. i.e., if you were selling real estate in a competing development, you might try to portray The Villages as something other than "Lovely."

I always thought forums should give members the ability to get "certified" status. To gain that status you would have to meet an established member, like Gracegirl, maybe buy her a drink and you get "certified" that you are who you say you are.

I want to be a certifier. Two drink minimum.

[shcisamax]

I see a new club coming in the recreational news.. TOTV certifiers...Sign me up.

[perrjojo]

I am tired of the few people on here, who don't live here and have made it a very long point to let everyone know they don't intend to move here, who nonetheless hang on and bring up every negative point about The Villages and its occupants, complete with with lectures and copying and pasting. And also the few "you're a jerk"- type people who live here but hate TV, or don't live here but push their nastiness in everyone's face through sarcasm and name calling.

I hope I have covered them all. Thank you to Schisamax for bringing up this elephant in the room--or on the forum, as it were.

This thread may get canceled by Admin, but enough is enough, and we really need a chance to have our say.
I doubt that any of is would walk into a friend or strangers home and begin to insult them. This is exactly what these posters are doing.

[Wandatime]

Funny how none of the trouble makers are commenting on THIS thread. :laugh:

I, on occasion, disagree with particular points of view expressed in this forum. If it is something that is not that big of a deal to me, I let it go. If it is something I feel strongly about, I try to voice my dissent and point of view in a respectful manner, with facts or documentation backing up my view where necessary. I appreciate those that do the same and usually just roll my eyes and scroll on by those that do not; however, the hate-filled posts made earlier today by non-villagers were awfully hard to ignore. Yet the only way to take the "wind out of their sails" is by doing just that.

I know that is easy to say but hard to do. Sometimes my fingers are just itching to type a snappy comeback.

[Polar Bear]

Good thread and I agree with the sentiments.

At the most basic level, the forum characteristic we're discussing is universal throughout the web. I've been a computer gamer and tech geek for my entire adult life. I know...I know...I'm WAY to old for that. I was an early-adopter. :) In the technology and gaming world, forums are a way of life. They're ubiquitous. And 100% of them have a small, very vocal group of nay-sayers. The subject matter does not matter. They are always there. But at the same time the forums are necessary and useful.

The key is to filter through the negativity, considering it for what value it might have (it does happen...heheh), without letting it get in your way of finding all the good and positive information that is far more prevalent. I think the vast majority of the veterans here know this and practice it already. I only encourage the newcomers to hang around and look for the good. It's abundant and easy to find.

[shcisamax]

Well said Wandatime!

[Sandy B]

Well I joined to get a better "feel" of The Villages. I don't live there YET! But we will be heading that way as soon as my current home sells. I believe TV will be a great place to call home.

I wish there were a couple of buttons on TOTV so I could add post, I.E. Agree; Disagree; like; love.

Sandy

[CFrance]

Good thread and I agree with the sentiments.

At the most basic level, the forum characteristic we're discussing is universal throughout the web. I've been a computer gamer and tech geek for my entire adult life. I know...I know...I'm WAY to old for that. I was an early-adopter. :) In the technology and gaming world, forums are a way of life. They're ubiquitous. And 100% of them have a small, very vocal group of nay-sayers. The subject matter does not matter. They are always there. But at the same time the forums are necessary and useful.

The key is to filter through the negativity, considering it for what value it might have (it does happen...heheh), without letting it get in your way of finding all the good and positive information that is far more prevalent. I think the vast majority of the veterans here know this and practice it already. I only encourage the newcomers to hang around and look for the good. It's abundant and easy to find.

Good post, Polar Bear. Our 40-year-old son is also a gamer, and he says the exact same things you do about the forums. He takes the useful things from the forums and ignores the rest. He's better than I am at keeping away from the naysayers.

[CFrance]

I want to be a certifier. Two drink minimum.
:eclipsee_gold_cup: It's people like you with a sense of humor that make coming back to the forum worthwhile.

[Polar Bear]

...Our 40-year-old son is also a gamer...He's better than I am at keeping away from the naysayers.

Heheh...I'm sure he's better than I am too!

[Taltarzac725]

Thanks for kicking the elephant. Mali the baby elephant gets kicked - Melbourne Zoo - YouTube (http://youtu.be/MASznBPmBqM)

[CFrance]

I agree!:agree:
Just do not reply to their posts and hopefully they will go away.
While that's a good idea, perrjojo, we have actually tried that and gotten nowhere with it. Last winter a group of 12 or 15 of us agreed to ignore threads on a certain topic, in hopes that the posters of that subject would self-implode. It didn't work. Every three days another thread of hatred of the subject was started, to the point that we just gave up.

I don't think most of these people would go away either. Some are oblivious; they might actually think they are winning. Others are just nasty. I think ignoring these posters fails because they are not reasonable people. However, they're smart enough to fly up to but stay under Admin's radar to keep from getting banned. I wish Admin had a rule that banned destructive behavior.

But I will try your suggestion one more time.:shrug:

[Halibut]

Yes, I agree CFrance and since we know who some of them are ... Why not just ignore all their many posts and just plain not answer their posts?

Indeed. They come because they get the attention they crave and validation of their pot-stirring. Since Usenet it has always been thus -- ignore the trolls! No will power required since there's a setting for it. :)

[pooh]

And maybe time to end the discussion, lest those writing be accused of what they are discussing here?

Just a thought....;)

[CFrance]

[QUOTE=pooh;902698]And maybe time to end the discussion, lest those writing be accused of what they are discussing here?

Just a thought....;)[/QUOTE
You are right, of course, Pooh. But at least We've had our say. I feel better. Thanks, Schisamax!

[NotGolfer]

Initially when I became a visitor to this forum, it was because I was moving here and I wanted to try to learn about the environment and what TV had to offer, who the good contractors were, how to build the house, etc. I actually had no idea people who didn't live here and never had were participating and giving advice.

So my question is why do people that don't live here participate? And I guess more to the point is why do they participate in a way that is condescending and supercilious towards people that do live here. I don't think they would like it if people on TOTV started putting down their hometown. Nobody is without skeletons.

I was new to T.V. when I heard of this site....I would come (still do) here to find out about services, possible "for sale" items and more having to do with T.V. I so agree with you Shcisamax, in every way!