Log in

View Full Version : Lasting Relationships


LUVNLIFE
11-14-2014, 07:50 AM
Science Says Lasting Relationships Come Down To 2 Basic Traits

Read more: Masters of Love - The Atlantic (http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2014/06/happily-ever-after/372573/#ixzz3J2uffEJw)

TVMayor
11-14-2014, 09:33 AM
Science Says Lasting Relationships Come Down To 2 Basic Traits

Read more: Masters of Love - The Atlantic (http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2014/06/happily-ever-after/372573/#ixzz3J2uffEJw)

Before I look I will guess time & money.

chachacha
11-14-2014, 09:55 AM
hmm, kindness and generosity. i am afraid that perhaps after being single for a long time it may be difficult to constantly "turn toward" another person as the article discusses....do we become too selfish in our routines to make room for someone else? or are some people just naturally selfish from youth and it has nothing to do with long time singleness? i can remember my own failures in this area which make it scary to commit again! it is a big responsibility to have someone love you!

manaboutown
11-14-2014, 10:10 AM
As the article mentions John Gottman has been the leading researcher on couple dynamics for many, many years. He is reputed to upon observing couples interact for 20 seconds or twenty minutes (I forget which) be able to predict whether they will stay together with something like 94% accuracy. Here is a link to a review of a book he coauthored. 7 Research-Based Principles for Making Marriage Work | World of Psychology (http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2012/01/08/7-research-based-principles-for-making-marriage-work/)

According to Gottman the four horsemen of the marriage apocalypse are criticism, defensiveness, contempt and stonewalling.

LUVNLIFE
11-14-2014, 10:22 AM
Thanks. Very true words and thoughts.