Hiaasen on golf & TV

[Boomer]

I have a real thing for Carl Hiaasen.

When his books hit, I throw all caution to the wind. To hell with the library's hold list. I don't do hold where Carl is concerned. I rush to the bookstore where I grab the brand new hardback, even before it reaches the bestseller list. I fling a piece of my retirement money at the clerk and I run home, as fast as I can, clutching Carl to my heaving bosom. And once I am back home, I just vant to be alone until I have read every word.

The new one is here. The Downhill Lie: A Hacker's Return To A Ruinous Sport.

It's Hiaasen on golf. He gave the game up for 32 years. He's back.

If you are having an affair of any kind (love, love-hate, just plain hate) with the game of golf, this book will make you laugh out loud. That's what I have been doing.

I have been a fan of Hiaasen's fiction for years. Stormy Weather is the first one I read and it's still my favorite. It's about a Florida hurricane. That's the book where I first met Skink, the wonderfully insane, sweet savage ex-governor of Florida.

But back to the new one. It is nonfiction. And I have to do a disclaimer here. Hiaasen gets a little political, for a page or two, here and there. :yikes: Just close your eyes for that part if you need to.

And he talks about TV. Yes, indeed he does. Remember the book is about golf. Hiaasen is awful at the game, so he says. So about TV, he writes...Only briefly do I try to imagine what it would be like to spend my final days on earth among 100,000 aging but feisty golf fanatics. Where in Dante's elaborate infrastructure of Hell would such a place fit?...

Hiaasen goes on to write...The Villages is surely the place to be if your dream is to drop dead in your FootJoys...

It seems that those commercials on the Golf Channel gave Hiaasen the same impression that they gave so many of us who are not good at golf or who do not golf at all.

If you want to read what else he says about TV, but you don't want to buy the book and the library list is long already, you could go to the bookstore and just read page 24 and the top of page 25.

So there's my review. Such as it is.

I know that I have, here on TOTV, in posts past, confessed my love for Charles Kuralt and for Judd Hirsch, but only as Alex on Taxi. But I have to tell you true. There is another. Carl. That man can turn a phrase.

Boomer

[REDCART]

But can he turn a phrase as well as Village Kahunna?

I'vr read Hiaasen'w Strip Tease, which of course had nothing to do with that fine art.

[Boomer]

Oh gr,

Now, you have made me laugh out loud, too. --turned a few phrases of your own, something tells me.

--about your one choice from my main man Hiaasen's work -- Strip Tease, huh. You were not judging a book by its cover were you?

Boomer :read:

btw, Does anybody know anything about Tim Dorsey? His new book is Atomic Lobster. My daughter told me about him today. She said he is close to Hiaasen in writing style and that he also writes about Florida. I just looked him up. -- looks promising.

To me Hiaasen's fiction is Florida meets Fargo.

[graciegirl]

OH BOOM. It is 5:00 A.M. and I am gonna drive over to Barnes and Noble in my nightie and wait until it opens to get that book.

The only vice that is still alive and well in my aging soul is my lust for literature. I am a thrifty person (some call me tight) and the only place I could max out my credit card is at the book store.

You are aiding and abetting my awful habit.

But I still think YOU turn a phrase as well as Laura Pulfer if not better at times.

[Taltarzac]

This is one Villager who has not golfed since he was a teen. >:(


I will have to check out pages 24 and 25 as you said though. Just because those are really cool numbers. :joke:

The Downhill Lie: A Hacker's Return To A Ruinous Sport http://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/06/books/06hiaasen.html?_r=1&oref=slogin

[Boomer]

OH BOOM. It is 5:00 A.M. and I am gonna drive over to Barnes and Noble in my nightie and wait until it opens to get that book.

The only vice that is still alive and well in my aging soul is my lust for literature. I am a thrifty person (some call me tight) and the only place I could max out my credit card is at the book store.


gg,

I know exactly what you mean. A bookstore is my crack house.

Boomer

[Boomer]

Tal,

I just clicked on your link to the NYT interview with Hiaasen about his new book and I read it all. Thank you for the connection.

and about those two pages --

I realize that, in the span of things, not a lot people read what I wrote.

But even so, I am glad that nobody knows who I am. My goodness. I might have to worry all day.

What if some angry bookstore manager came after me because people were coming in and just reading pages 24 and 25? -- and spilling coffee all over those two pages. OH NO!

Come to think of it though, maybe that B&N there in TV should just bookmark those two pages about TV in one copy and put it out in their coffee shop. Might sell a few books or at least some coffee.

Oh well, I do so digress. Digress I do so do.

Anyway, thanks again, Tal. I loved the article.

Boomer

[Taltarzac]

I do that a lot in bookstores. Just read pages around 24 and 25 or some combination of the above as well as thumb through some books looking for those numbers. I do buy books too on occasion.

The trick it seems is to get something you are going to purchase and have it in your hands while you go browsing.

Check out page 485 of J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. :o :read:

[Irish Rover]

Thanks for the tip Boomer. I'm also a big Hiaasen fan and have read just about everything he's written. If you like mystery with a Florida setting, try some of Randy Wayne White's stuff. Ex navy seal/spook posing as a marine biologist. There won't be any literature prizes sent his way, but the books a filled with memorable characters and they are entertaining. OK, I'm off to buy Downhill Lie.
Thanks again

[Boomer]

Tal,

I also read in bookstores all the time. -- for a couple of reasons. If it's a new author to me, I need to know that I like their style before I buy the book. And I also need to make sure the font is friendly to my aging boomer eyes.

And they really don't mind readers among 'em. They know most readers will buy.

I took a side job in a bookstore once. I thought the employee discount, 40% in those days, could support my habit. Hah! I ended up owing the bookstore money at the end of the week.

The only worse fate I could meet in a side job would be to work in a really, really good ice cream store.

I observe human nature when I am in bookstores. Bookstores are meetmarkets, too. It's fun to watch the dance that goes on throughout the rows and rows of shelves. And I have noticed that in the really big bookstores, the courtship rituals are influenced by the book interests according to the sections.

And I intended to log out an hour ago and get out of here for now. And then I started to digress. But I will stop -- for now.

To those who might be reading here, be careful at the bookstore -- or not. ;)

Boomer

[Boomer]

Thanks for the tip Boomer. I'm also a big Hiaasen fan and have read just about everything he's written. If you like mystery with a Florida setting, try some of Randy Wayne White's stuff. Ex navy seal/spook posing as a marine biologist. There won't be any literature prizes sent his way, but the books a filled with memorable characters and they are entertaining. OK, I'm off to buy Downhill Lie.
Thanks again


IR,

Thanks for the rec. Sounds like my kind of book.

-- about those literature prizes...

Prizes? Prizes? Dun need no steenkin' prizes.

Boomer

:edit: Re. the edit: I just became obsessed with trying to fix my accent. It's not workin' for me today. I gotta get out of here. I may be descending into madness. -- once more.

[Taltarzac]

IR,

Thanks for the rec. Sounds like my kind of book.

-- about those literature prizes...

Prizes? Prizes? Dun need no steenkin' prizes.

Boomer

:edit: Re. the edit: I just became obsessed with trying to fix my accent. It's not workin' for me today. I gotta get out of here. I may be descending into madness. -- once more.




I often think I am descending into madness. :joke:

[cabo35]

More really funny golf books by Rick Riley who for many years wrote for Sports Illustrated. A book critic declared his works average three laughs per page. His golf books:

Shanks for Nothing

Missing Links

Who's your Caddy

[Boomer]

cabo, three laughs per page -- sounds like good stuff. And I really like the titles.

Hiaasen refers to other writers within this book. His good friend David Feherty has a big part. Hiaasen says Feherty's column for Golf Magazine is "refreshingly blunt and occasionally raunchy." He also mentions Feherty's novel A Nasty Bit of Rough as being hilarious.

Feherty got the honor of doing the back cover blurb. Hiaasen may owe him though. Feherty invited him to tag along at the Bridgestone Invitational where they watched Tiger play up close.

One of the things I found funniest in the book was all the stuff that Hiaasen was desperately buying from infomercials that promised to improve his game. I wonder if any golfers in TV are wearing something called a Q-Link.

When it comes to my own game, all I can do is laugh. There is no hope whatsoever.

Boomer

[beady]

Haissen is my newly found favorite author:

Boomer, I just loved Stormy Weather and Skink is one of my favorite characters.

Do not play golf so I am not sure I would get the humor in the new book. But I know someone who loves Haissen and play's golf ,so he's getting "The Downhill Lie" for his birthday.

Thanks for the review.

[smalldog]

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm107/smalldog2008/IMG_0171-3.jpg
Smalldog Sez Don't know why but I find myself out of step with this author :dontknow: just cant get into his books ::) I love James Hall and Randy W White but somehow this Carl Hiaaasen and I don't communicate :o Guess I'll have to try again because I really wish it wasn't so

[Boomer]

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm107/smalldog2008/IMG_0171-3.jpg
Smalldog Sez Don't know why but I find myself out of step with this author :dontknow: just cant get into his books ::) I love James Hall and Randy W White but somehow this Carl Hiaaasen and I don't communicate :o Guess I'll have to try again because I really wish it wasn't so


Oh dear. Oh dear.

smalldog? smalldog? Are you OK?

You look so sad. And you say that you can't get into Hiaasen. But I think I might know what happened.

Did you start with "Sick Puppy"? It was not one of his best. I know.

But I bet you did not finish it. That may be what made you so sad. As I recall, things turn out fine for Boodle, the Labrador retriever, who started the book belonging to that vile lobbyist. And then poor Boodle swallowed those glass eyes from those wall trophies that belonged to that big jerk of an owner, Palmer Stoat. A real creep. (I really think that is a job requirement for a lot of lobbyists.) And then Boodle did not feel very well. And I think that might be where you stopped reading. I just want you to know that Boodle is OK now.

But I understand that Hiaasen is not for everybody. "Stormy Weather" remains my favorite, even though Carl and I have been together for a long time. Even Carl can hit and miss. Just like everybody else. But I am glad you like those other authors mentioned in this thread. I need to try them.

Anyway, smalldog. I hope you feel better soon. Boodle is OK. Really.

Boomer :read:

[graciegirl]

Oh dear. Oh dear.

smalldog? smalldog? Are you OK?

You look so sad. And you say that you can't get into Hiaasen. But I think I might know what happened.

Did you start with "Sick Puppy"? It was not one of his best. I know.

But I bet you did not finish it. That may be what made you so sad. As I recall, things turn out fine for Boodle, the Labrador retriever, who started the book belonging to that vile lobbyist. And then poor Boodle swallowed those glass eyes from those wall trophies that belonged to that big jerk of an owner, Palmer Stoat. A real creep. (I really think that is a job requirement for a lot of lobbyists.) And then Boodle did not feel very well. And I think that might be where you stopped reading. I just want you to know that Boodle is OK now.

But I understand that Hiaasen is not for everybody. "Stormy Weather" remains my favorite, even though Carl and I have been together for a long time. Even Carl can hit and miss. Just like everybody else. But I am glad you like those other authors mentioned in this thread. I need to try them.

Anyway, smalldog. I hope you feel better soon. Boodle is OK. Really.

Boomer :read:


Boomer.

WHO WOULDN'T LOVE YOU? You are THE best writer here. I just wish I could meet you in person. sigh

GG

[sschuler1]

Boomer,

I think you need to watch a show call "Numbers". If you liked Judd Hirsch in Taxi, I think you will like him equally as well in this role. Of course, he isn't the lead in this show, so your swooning time will be limited. But they have given him more meaningful airtime in this role lately, and he is the epitome of the sage in this role as well. Enjoy!

SS

[Boomer]

Boomer,

I think you need to watch a show call "Numbers". If you liked Judd Hirsch in Taxi, I think you will like him equally as well in this role. Of course, he isn't the lead in this show, so your swooning time will be limited. But they have given him more meaningful airtime in this role lately, and he is the epitome of the sage in this role as well. Enjoy!

SS


ss,

Thank you. I had no idea he was still out there anywhere. I will definitely check out this show. I am sure we have both changed a little since those "Taxi" days. Now, if only he had Jim Ignatowski with him. I was not madly in love with Iggy, but nobody was funnier.

Boomer

[smalldog]

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm107/smalldog2008/IMG_0171-3.jpg
Smalldog Sez when we lived in Sebastian we were quite near the Indian County North library right on 512 there, and made liberal use of it as it was a large modern well funded operation with a vast selection of books as well as other materials for loan (including a perhaps 8 or 10 books by Hiaasen) ::)
it was in this environment that I reluctantly discovered that his style of prose was of a style that I did not enjoy :dontknow: even though some people do, so since I was reading for my personal pleasure I no longer tried to read that which was not pleasureable to me
and if you knew anything about pugs and me you would know I am a very happy dog but sometimes when I think hard,I squint a little :joke:

[Boomer]

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm107/smalldog2008/IMG_0171-3.jpg
Smalldog Sez when we lived in Sebastian we were quite near the Indian County North library right on 512 there, and made liberal use of it as it was a large modern well funded operation with a vast selection of books as well as other materials for loan (including a perhaps 8 or 10 books by Hiaasen) ::)
it was in this environment that I reluctantly discovered that his style of prose was of a style that I did not enjoy :dontknow: even though some people do, so since I was reading for my personal pleasure I no longer tried to read that which was not pleasureable to me
and if you knew anything about pugs and me you would know I am a very happy dog but sometimes when I think hard,I squint a little :joke:


Hi smalldog,

I am so glad that you feel fine. I was worried about you when I wrote to you about Hiaasen's Sick Puppy. I thought surely you were feeling bad about Boodle's problems early in the book. ;)

I could tell that you like to read though. And isn't it wonderful that we all don't like the same authors.

btw, about pugs being happy -- How well I know. We have some good friends who have two pugs. Those pugs always give us the most exuberant welcome when we visit. And if for any reason, we go outside during the visit, maybe to retrieve something from the car or whatever, we get the happy welcomes all over again. And I always laugh out loud. And I am thankful that they are not the size of a Great Dane. Their owners tell us, "You have been pugged!" If a pug cannot make someone laugh, nothing can.

Boomer

[Boomer]

This morning I found myself looking back through the Book Forum here, and I came across this one about Carl Hiaasen.

As I confessed at the beginning of this thread long ago, I shamelessly love Carl Hiaasen. I started this thread last spring when CH had just published a new book. Well, I got all excited the other day when I heard that now Carl has another new book. So away I went to the bookstore. (I buy this guy in hardback.)

But alas, when I got there I found out that Hiaasen's newest book Scat is a kids' book. He wrote Hoot and Flush for kids.

So anyway, I bought a copy of Scat. But I am starting to think that if Carl cannot crank out those books for grownups a little more often, I am going to have to get me a Florida author on the side. And when I saw this thread this morning, I remembered that there were some other author recs in it. And sure enough, there are.

My offspring, Boomette, is also a Hiaasen fan. (She did listen to me about a few things.) But she, too, is having some issues because she is out of Carl Hiaasen books.

But there might be hope. No. Nothing coming soon for us from Carl that we have heard about anyway. But Boomette may have found a guy to fill in. She is reading Orange Crush by Tim Dorsey.

And she gave Tim Dorsey the best compliment she could. She said his humor is close to CH's. She said that she found herself laughing out loud. Funny books about Florida. What's not to love?

Boomer :read:

[Boomer]

I had looked through this whole thread at other people's posts this morning, looking for book recs.

And then I posted about Tim Dorsey, just now.

And then, for some reason, I looked at my own old posts in the thread.

And there at the bottom of one of them I found myself telling you how Boomette had recommended Tim Dorsey to me. A while back. And I did not listen. Turnabout is fair play so they say. But now, I will listen and read Tim Dorsey.

So anyway, this is embarrassing. And I bet you can tell that I am putting off getting tax stuff ready for my accountant, Eeyore. Can't wait to see Eeyore. Last year at this time he was really gloom and doom.

Oh well, enough confessions for one morning.

Boomer the Redundant

[KayakerNC]

I had looked through this whole thread at other people's posts this morning, looking for book recs. Boomer the Redundant

Hiaasen, Hall, Dorsey, White are all writers of the S Florida mystery genre.
But the original, the master, the man who started the whole thing is John D. MacDonald. Sadly, he left us in 1986.
I would recommend the James W Hall books.

[collie1228]

Kuyaker, you hit the nail on the head with MacDonald. His McGee series is still the best ever, bar none, and I still go back and read one occasionally. I've probably read them each of them at least three times over the years. I started reading him in high school in the mid-60's - He lived not far from me in Piseco Lake, NY. I had an opportunity to go to a rare MacDonald book signing in Piseco once, but since I was busy with a young family, I decided not to go. He died about six months later. I realized then that when he died, so did Travis McGee, which still can bring a tear to my eye if I dwell on it. I should have made the one hour drive. Anyway, enough of that, I've found Hiassen and White to be great too. Carl is one of the few writers who can make me laugh out loud. My only problem is I don't know the correct pronunciation of his last name! I'm not familiar with Hall or Dorsey, but I'll be stopping in the library later this week and see what I can find . . . .

[Boomer]

Kuyaker, you hit the nail on the head with MacDonald. His McGee series is still the best ever, bar none, and I still go back and read one occasionally. I've probably read them each of them at least three times over the years. I started reading him in high school in the mid-60's - He lived not far from me in Piseco Lake, NY. I had an opportunity to go to a rare MacDonald book signing in Piseco once, but since I was busy with a young family, I decided not to go. He died about six months later. I realized then that when he died, so did Travis McGee, which still can bring a tear to my eye if I dwell on it. I should have made the one hour drive. Anyway, enough of that, I've found Hiassen and White to be great too. Carl is one of the few writers who can make me laugh out loud. My only problem is I don't know the correct pronunciation of his last name! I'm not familiar with Hall or Dorsey, but I'll be stopping in the library later this week and see what I can find . . . .



I know what you mean about his last name. I say it, with a long i, Hi-Uh-Sen, with the accent on the first syllable. (Not completely sure that's right, but mostly sure.) When I write one of my Odes to Carl, I always have to check the spelling of Hiaasen. I want to give it a double s instead of a double a.

Boomer

[collie1228]

Thanks Boomer - the phonetic you provided is what I say in my mind when I see his name. I've always been reluctant to say it out loud in fear of someone laughing at me!

[Boomer]

Thanks Boomer - the phonetic you provided is what I say in my mind when I see his name. I've always been reluctant to say it out loud in fear of someone laughing at me!

Ahhhh, just tell 'em Boomer's got your back. :beer3:

[l2ridehd]

I have also read all his books so will have to get this one. I usually wait for paper back. If you like his wise cracking detective type books, try Nelson Demille also. His are set on Long Island vs Florida, but same character type. Demille is more broad in his literary scope, but also good reads. Try Plum Island as a starting point.

[Irish Rover]

Boomer - I just read three books by Daniel Silva and they were good. All three follow the same character - Israeli Assassin - who poses as an art restorer. I think you might like them "The Kill Artist" "The English Assassin" and "The Confessor". Happy reading.:coolsmiley:
IR

[collie1228]

I2ridehd, I too have discovered Nelson Demille. And I too loved Plum Island. Good character development! I recommend him highly.

[Cassie325]

After reading this thread again....I personally think you should write a book!!

I believe it would be thoroughly enjoyable and thought provoking!!


What would you write about? Hhmmmm....that is a good topic for a new thread. Will start one...

But seriously...write a book!!

[uujudy]

Thanks to the wonderful information from you folks, I took your list of recommended Florida authors to The Villages library yesterday. The librarian was so helpful, but when she looked at my list she said, "You left off an author. Patrick Smith should be on that list." She said his A Land Remembered is usually on their reserved list, and she was surprised the book was on the shelf. She was being so darned helpful I didn't want to go into "Well, the authors should be funny, too..." so I took the book.

She then took me directly to the Carl Hiaasen section. She pronounced it HI - uh - sun, like the flower (sort of). I've been calling him hi - ASS - un. Oops! Again, based on your recommendations, I did NOT get Sick Puppy; I got Nature Girl as my first Hiaasen book.

What a good feeling! I have 2 new authors of 2 new library books, and I'm a happy Villager Let's hope I can finish them before the due date. TV is one busy place!

Thanks again for all the great recommendations! You guys are :eclipsee_gold_cup:

[BritParrothead]

I am a great fan of Carl Hiaasen and have read all his books. So if you like him you should try:
Lawrence Shames; all set in the Keys
Tom Corcoran; Florida based
Randy Wayne White; Florida and thereabouts
Les Standiford; Florida
And last but by no means least
Jimmy Buffett :bowdown::bowdown:

[Boomer]

This afternoon I started Tim Dorsey's Hammerhead Ranch Motel. I am not too far into it yet, but far enough to know I like this guy. The sleazeball characters he introduces to the reader first thing rank right up there with some of Hiaasen's creeps. I hope that Dorsey, too, has a wicked fate in store for the slime. CH never disappoints on that one.

One of the very early scenes in this book is set on that bridge over Tampa Bay. That bridge! I hate that bridge! I always have to close my eyes. And this book won't make that bridge any easier for me.

But I think I like Tim Dorsey.

The back of the book blurb compares him to Hiaasen, but it says that while Hiaasen fires bullets, Dorsey makes sure his gun is filled with hollow-point.

Boomer

[BritParrothead]

OOH, I forgot about Tim Dorsey, and his books are sitting right here in front of me! I think he is soo funny. We share the same sense of humour (weird) :jester::jester:
You should try to read them in order, Florida Roadkill is the first I think.

[uujudy]

Boomer, it's all your fault! :cus: You did this to get back at me for the 57 Chevy on the ribbon of moonlight, didn't you? I hadn't read anything by Carl Hiaasen, but since you introduced me to him I've read Nature Girl, Basket Case, & Skin Tight. I love his books. I should say Thank You, but thanks to you I'm falling behind in my classes, and Mr. Judy can't sleep.

Boomer, The Villages is a very busy place. I don't have time for this. I'm taking a drawing class and a watercolor class, and they both have homework. I'm reading Carl's books instead of doing my homework during the day, and at night I read Carl under the covers with the bitty book light so I don't wake Mr. Judy -- but the bed shakes when I try to stifle my guffaws, and I snort and I have tears running down my face. Mr.Judy wakes up and gives me the look. I just checked out Stormy Weather from The Villages library. I'll start it tonight. You're a very bad influence. ;)

[Boomer]

Boomer, it's all your fault! :cus: You did this to get back at me for the 57 Chevy on the ribbon of moonlight, didn't you? I hadn't read anything by Carl Hiaasen, but since you introduced me to him I've read Nature Girl, Basket Case, & Skin Tight. I love his books. I should say Thank You, but thanks to you I'm falling behind in my classes, and Mr. Judy can't sleep.

Boomer, The Villages is a very busy place. I don't have time for this. I'm taking a drawing class and a watercolor class, and they both have homework. I'm reading Carl's books instead of doing my homework during the day, and at night I read Carl under the covers with the bitty book light so I don't wake Mr. Judy -- but the bed shakes when I try to stifle my guffaws, and I snort and I have tears running down my face. Mr.Judy wakes up and gives me the look. I just checked out Stormy Weather from The Villages library. I'll start it tonight. You're a very bad influence. ;)


Wow! Judy, when I read your post I started feeling downright influential for a few minutes. Hubris was starting to set in. But then I thought I had better get over myself before I could not stand myself.

Even though I am really glad you like Carl Hiaasen's books, I think we had better have a little talk about that guffawing and snorting you are doing, resulting in getting "the look." I know that look. And I certainly hope you are not drinking milk or anything while you read Hiaasen. Having it come out your nose would be most unattractive. You must be careful. I do not want to read about you and Mr. Judy in that magazine that runs that monthly feature "Can This Marriage Be Saved?"

Stormy Weather is still my favorite. Skin Tight comes in second.

But I cannot see a wood chipper without thinking of Skin Tight. In fact, a couple of weeks ago we had to have two big trees taken down. Mr. Boomer loves to cut down trees, but on these I had to change his mind. They were bigguns.

Anyway, you know how retired guys are. So, of course, he was hanging out with the tree-cutter-downer guys while they were working. I looked out the window from time to time but I stayed out of the loop.

But on one trip past the window, I looked and I did not see Mr. Boomer! I could not find him anywhere! I could see all the other guys! I could see their big wood chipper! I could hear it running! And you know what I thought! "Ohhhhh, Nooooo, was Mr. Boomer out there giving them helpful retired guy hints on how to take those trees down?!!"

Boomer

[uujudy]

. . . And I certainly hope you are not drinking milk or anything while you read Hiaasen. Having it come out your nose would be most unattractive. You must be careful. I do not want to read about you and Mr. Judy in that magazine that runs that monthly feature "Can This Marriage Be Saved?"

Stormy Weather is still my favorite. Skin Tight comes in second.

But I cannot see a wood chipper without thinking of Skin Tight. . . . But on one trip past the window, I looked and I did not see Mr. Boomer! I could not find him anywhere! I could see all the other guys! I could see their big wood chipper! I could hear it running! And you know what I thought! "Ohhhhh, Nooooo, was Mr. Boomer out there giving them helpful retired guy hints on how to take those trees down?!!"

Boomer

Boomer,
Oh Man! (or Boy Howdy!) That's the first thought I would have, too! You did find Mr. Boomer, right? Please tell me you found him?
And I don't drink anything in bed that might squirt out my nose. I'm very careful drinking anything when I'm reading Carl's books.

BritParrothead,
Please don't! Please don't introduce me to more funny Florida authors. I have homework. Mr. Judy has to sleep! Please!

[Boomer]

Boomer,
Oh Man! (or Boy Howdy!) That's the first thought I would have, too! You did find Mr. Boomer, right? Please tell me you found him?
And I don't drink anything in bed that might squirt out my nose. I'm very careful drinking anything when I'm reading Carl's books.

BritParrothead,
Please don't! Please don't introduce me to more funny Florida authors. I have homework. Mr. Judy has to sleep! Please!

Thanks Judy. Yes, I found him. (Actually I knew he was getting along fine with those guys.)

I showed him what I wrote here. He just laughed. He is used to me. Me and that constant narrator that lives inside my head. Most people would look out the window and think nothing of the scene. I, on the other hand, went immediately into an entire story. 'tis an affliction of sorts. But I feel better to know that you would have thought the same thing.

That wood chipper scene in Skin Tight sure made an impression. And that was before the wood chipper in Fargo.

Boomer



.

[uujudy]

. . . Most people would look out the window and think nothing of the scene. I, on the other hand, went immediately into an entire story. 'tis an affliction of sorts. But I feel better to know that you would have thought the same thing. . . .

OMG! Boomer! We ARE related! It IS an affliction! You think up stories, and I think up headlines! They usually begin with "Utah woman" and include the word "tragic." LOL

I'm glad you found Mr. Boomer safe and sound. Glad we didn't have to read "Cincinnati man not so chipper after tragic chipper accident"

[tony]

oooooooo, Judy. omygudness.

Journalists everywhere will wince tonight and they won't know why.

[Boomer]

OMG! Boomer! We ARE related! It IS an affliction! You think up stories, and I think up headlines! They usually begin with "Utah woman" and include the word "tragic." LOL

I'm glad you found Mr. Boomer safe and sound. Glad we didn't have to read "Cincinnati man not so chipper after tragic chipper accident"

Judy, that sounds just like something seen on the front page of one of those tabloids. I showed Mr. B the headline you wrote and he just laughed and shook his head. -- mumbled something about birds of a feather.

So you write headlines in your head. This is such great news.

I could use a headline for a story that popped into my head one time, and I told it, right there, on the spot, and uh oh. It was just a story. But it got away from me and took on a life of its own. It was the story of me and Johnny Marzetti. And then there was the story that I told a kid who, as it turned out, got him into big trouble with his teacher and I had to go get him out of it. (That teacher had absolutely no sense of humor.)

Anyway Judy, my real life is calling me away from the computer right now, but I plan to come back and tell the story of me and Johnny Marzetti and I hope you will write a headline for it. (And I do not think that Carl Hiaasen will care one single bit that I am hijacking his thread for a little while.)

Boomer

[tony]

This is like standing in front of an aquarium, but I'm not watching fish, I'm watching English majors.

Instead of fish floating by taking big gulps and striking at bits of food, I'm seeing English majors swimming round looking for adjectives.

Wonder what Mr. Hiaasen would say if he saw this carrying-on and hijacking a thread about his work?

[Boomer]

I decided to ditch the story about me that I put in here last night in an attempt to defend English majors. It was late. And the story made me look way too much like an English major. I must try hard not to look like an English major around here. I must try to look like someone else, anyone else, but not an English major. Of course, now I look like Sybil.

[BritParrothead]

Well i am sitting her in my office looking for something to read, I came upon 2 books I bought & read a looong time ago. The author is S.V.Date. I am so sorry Boomer, he too is Florida and funny :jester: The 2 I have are, Deep Water & Smokeout. Try them you will love 'em as well.:jester:

[Boomer]

This thread is fun. All these books!

I may have to get my act together and get myself out of Ohio and on down the road about a thousand miles or so to TV so that I can start a Florida authors book club. Just think of the good times we would have. Only those who share that wicked sense of humor would show up. And we would certainly have to adjourn quickly in order to go for refreshments. Or maybe someday we could just all pile into the car and take a road trip farther south and crash Carl Hiaasen's office at the Miami Herald. Do you think he would have us arrested?

Boomer

[BritParrothead]

Carl Hiaasen's office at the Miami Herald. Do you think he would have us arrested?

Even better, we could turn up en mass at his house boat down in the keys??

[Boomer]

This is an old thread. I know. But I picked it back up to, first of all, whine around a little because the only thing Carl Hiaasen has written for adults in a really long time was the golf book I talked about here. And that one was fun, but not fiction and not my favorite. After that he wrote one for kids. But when in the heck is he going to give us another one of his books about Florida, a book full of those weird and funny characters like Skink, and also those bad guys who get what they deserve? It has been way too long since Hiaasen has published a real Hiaasen.

I thought I was going to be able to bide my time with Tim Dorsey, as a replacement, while I waited for Carl to find his muse again. But Dorsey is just not for me. Although, at first, I thought I would like him, I ended up not even giving him much of a chance. I don't know how to explain why, and I should not try because I did not read too far with Dorsey. Maybe it was because he just was not Carl. (sigh) They have been compared. But Dorsey's touch is different. To me it seemed like not so much a touch, but a sledgehammer maybe with Dorsey. I know people who really like him though. I might have to give him another try sometime.

But for now, I am thinking about picking up on Randy Wayne White. (Hey, it's fun to try saying his name a bunch of times, really fast.)

Randy Wayne White has been mentioned in this thread. And I know he is really popular. I think he lives in Florida now and used to own a fishing boat and was a guide before he was a writer. And is there a bar somewhere around Sanibel maybe that is connected to him? -- I don't know, but I heard something somewhere that made me think that.

So I am thinking about giving Randy Wayne White a chance as my Florida author while I pine away waiting for Carl Hiaasen to write a new book.

I hope it works out that I can kill a little time with Randy Wayne White and that I think he is funny and that he does not do gruesome descriptions of the crimes. I do not like to read gruesome stuff. Yeah, I know. Carl Hiaasen puts people into woodchippers and suitcases, but they are always bad guys and the descriptions are not gruesome. I sure wish Hiaasen would get his act together and write another book like Stormy Weather.

Boomer :read:

[villages07]

Hey Boomer.... I had never heard of Carl H before this thread (being a relatively new Floridian). I picked up 2 of his old tomes at a yard sale (gotta love those 25c paperbacks) and have read Skinny Dip with Nature Girl in the wings. It was enjoyable, wise guy, fun reading. Thanks for the recommendation.

Randy Wayne White.... had also been recommended to me about a year ago. I picked up one of his books at the library, and, quite frankly, struggled to get through it... just couldn't get into the characters or pace. Seemed a much different flavor than Carl H. We'll see what you think.