Guest
06-18-2008, 07:23 AM
I am not very good with this type of application or chat room, but our Villa Escandido. web site has come up with something priceless I would like to share with every one.
Henry
"I don't normally pass on emails to all of us loopers but, if you are as frustrated with Washington as I am you will appreciate this. John
A Washington, DC airport ticket agent offers some examples
of why our country is in trouble.
1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle
seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being
near the window. (On an airplane?!)
2. I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted
to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the
flight and the passport information, and then she
interrupted me with, 'I'm not trying to make you
look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts ..'
Without trying to make her look stupid, I calmly explained,
'Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa.
Her response - click.
3. A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a
Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the
vacation in Orlando .. He said he was expecting an
ocean-view room. I tried to explain that's not
possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state.
He replied, 'Don't lie to me, I looked on the map
and Florida is a very thin state!' (OMG)
4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked,
'Is it possible to see England from Canada ?' I
said, 'No.' She said, 'But they look so close
on the map.' (OMG, again!)
5. An aide for a cabinet member once called and asked if he
could rent a car in Dallas. I pulled up the reservation and
noticed he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas. When I
asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, 'I
heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to
drive between gates to save time.' (Aghhhh)
6. An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed
to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit
left at 8:30 am and got to Chicago at 8:33 am. I explained
that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she
couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally,
I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that.
7. A New York lawmaker called and aske d, 'Do airlines
put your physical description on your bag so they know
whose luggage belongs to whom?' I said, 'No, why do
you ask?' She said, 'Well, when I checked in with
the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said (FAT).
I am a little overweight, but I think that's very rude
After putting her on hold for a minute while I looked into
it (I was laughing). I came back and explained the city
code for Fresno, CA is (FAT - Fresno Air Terminal), and the
airline was just putting the destination tag on her luggage.
8. A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip
package to Hawaii .. After going over all the cost info,
she asked, 'Would it be cheaper to fly to California,
and then take the train to Hawaii ?'
9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who
asked, 'How do I know which plane to get on?' I
asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied,
'I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these
planes have numbers on them.'
10. A lady Senator called and said, 'I need to fly to
Pepsi-Cola, Florida . Do I have to get on one of those
little computer planes?' I asked if she meant fly to
Pensacola, Fl. on a commuter plane. She said, 'Yeah,
whatever, smarty!'
11. A senior Senator called and had a question about the
documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a
lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him that he
needed a visa. 'Oh, no I don't. I've been to
China many times and never had to have one of those.' I
double-checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa.
When I told him this he said, 'Look, I've been to
China four times and every time they have accepted my
American Express!'
12. A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make reservations.
'I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York ', she
said. I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, 'Are
you sure that's the name of the town?'
'Yes, what flights do you have?' replied the lady.
After some searching, I came back with, 'I'm
sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in
the country and can't find a Rhino anywhere.'
The lady retorted, 'Oh, don't be silly! Everyone
knows where it is. Check your map!' So I scoured a map
of the state of New York and finally offered, 'You
don't mean Buffalo, do you?' The reply?
'Whatever! I knew it was a big animal.'
Now you know why the Government is in the shape that
it's in and who is causing it to happen."
Henry
"I don't normally pass on emails to all of us loopers but, if you are as frustrated with Washington as I am you will appreciate this. John
A Washington, DC airport ticket agent offers some examples
of why our country is in trouble.
1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle
seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being
near the window. (On an airplane?!)
2. I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted
to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the
flight and the passport information, and then she
interrupted me with, 'I'm not trying to make you
look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts ..'
Without trying to make her look stupid, I calmly explained,
'Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa.
Her response - click.
3. A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a
Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the
vacation in Orlando .. He said he was expecting an
ocean-view room. I tried to explain that's not
possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state.
He replied, 'Don't lie to me, I looked on the map
and Florida is a very thin state!' (OMG)
4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked,
'Is it possible to see England from Canada ?' I
said, 'No.' She said, 'But they look so close
on the map.' (OMG, again!)
5. An aide for a cabinet member once called and asked if he
could rent a car in Dallas. I pulled up the reservation and
noticed he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas. When I
asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, 'I
heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to
drive between gates to save time.' (Aghhhh)
6. An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed
to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit
left at 8:30 am and got to Chicago at 8:33 am. I explained
that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she
couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally,
I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that.
7. A New York lawmaker called and aske d, 'Do airlines
put your physical description on your bag so they know
whose luggage belongs to whom?' I said, 'No, why do
you ask?' She said, 'Well, when I checked in with
the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said (FAT).
I am a little overweight, but I think that's very rude
After putting her on hold for a minute while I looked into
it (I was laughing). I came back and explained the city
code for Fresno, CA is (FAT - Fresno Air Terminal), and the
airline was just putting the destination tag on her luggage.
8. A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip
package to Hawaii .. After going over all the cost info,
she asked, 'Would it be cheaper to fly to California,
and then take the train to Hawaii ?'
9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who
asked, 'How do I know which plane to get on?' I
asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied,
'I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these
planes have numbers on them.'
10. A lady Senator called and said, 'I need to fly to
Pepsi-Cola, Florida . Do I have to get on one of those
little computer planes?' I asked if she meant fly to
Pensacola, Fl. on a commuter plane. She said, 'Yeah,
whatever, smarty!'
11. A senior Senator called and had a question about the
documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a
lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him that he
needed a visa. 'Oh, no I don't. I've been to
China many times and never had to have one of those.' I
double-checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa.
When I told him this he said, 'Look, I've been to
China four times and every time they have accepted my
American Express!'
12. A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make reservations.
'I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York ', she
said. I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, 'Are
you sure that's the name of the town?'
'Yes, what flights do you have?' replied the lady.
After some searching, I came back with, 'I'm
sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in
the country and can't find a Rhino anywhere.'
The lady retorted, 'Oh, don't be silly! Everyone
knows where it is. Check your map!' So I scoured a map
of the state of New York and finally offered, 'You
don't mean Buffalo, do you?' The reply?
'Whatever! I knew it was a big animal.'
Now you know why the Government is in the shape that
it's in and who is causing it to happen."