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outlaw
09-27-2015, 07:23 AM
Seems like there are a lot of touchy, thin skinned, people in TV based on a lot of posters comments. People always attacking someone for just stating their opinion on something. People reading a word or phrase as an insult to someone or something. It seems the PC epidemic has come to TV. It's like people are waiting to pounce on the next PC indiscretion. I thought oldsters were pretty much immune to words ruining their day considering that we have lived through all the challenges and crises in life. What ever happened to "live and let live"? Why can't people disagree and still be friendly? When did forums change from being a place to hear different perspectives on subjects to a venue to reinforce a group think position? Have forums morphed into nothing more than a Facebook page where only like minded "friends" are allowed in?:confused:

Greg Nelson
09-27-2015, 07:38 AM
misery likes company..sad to say

Taltarzac725
09-27-2015, 07:42 AM
Seems like there are a lot of touchy, thin skinned, people in TV based on a lot of posters comments. People always attacking someone for just stating their opinion on something. People reading a word or phrase as an insult to someone or something. It seems the PC epidemic has come to TV. It's like people are waiting to pounce on the next PC indiscretion. I thought oldsters were pretty much immune to words ruining their day considering that we have lived through all the challenges and crises in life. What ever happened to "live and let live"? Why can't people disagree and still be friendly? When did forums change from being a place to hear different perspectives on subjects to a venue to reinforce a group think position? Have forums morphed into nothing more than a Facebook page where only like minded "friends" are allowed in?:confused:

It depends a bit on whom you criticize or what. There are some very passionate lovers of all things Villages on here.

Walter123
09-27-2015, 07:55 AM
Seems like there are a lot of touchy, thin skinned, people in TV based on a lot of posters comments. People always attacking someone for just stating their opinion on something. People reading a word or phrase as an insult to someone or something. It seems the PC epidemic has come to TV. It's like people are waiting to pounce on the next PC indiscretion. I thought oldsters were pretty much immune to words ruining their day considering that we have lived through all the challenges and crises in life. What ever happened to "live and let live"? Why can't people disagree and still be friendly? When did forums change from being a place to hear different perspectives on subjects to a venue to reinforce a group think position? Have forums morphed into nothing more than a Facebook page where only like minded "friends" are allowed in?:confused:

Maybe the title of the thread should be Thin Skined TOTVers not TVers since you are basing your opinion on TOTV comments.

tomwed
09-27-2015, 08:19 AM
You called us oldsters?

A new guide for journalists warns against using terms which discriminate against people of a certain age.

'Senior', 'fossil' and 'biddy' have been blacklisted by the lexicon of unacceptable phrases, which has been compiled by an international think tank.
Instead, people aged over 50 should be referred to as 'older people' or simply 'man' or 'woman' followed by their age, the guide suggests.

'Old ladies' of both the 'little' and 'sweet' variety are also to be avoided, according to the report.

The guide says it aims to help journalists report stories about "older people" in a "fair contemporary and unbiased" manner.

The authors of the report state that 80 per cent of older Americans have been subjected to ageist stereotypes. "While names and characterizations may vary, the message is the same: older men and women are incompetent and lack sufficiency," the guide states.

Journalists are advised: "If you need to identify individuals over the age of 50, 'older adults' is preferred over 'senior' and 'elderly', which can be discriminatory in nature.

I agree with you. I don't find any of the above words including oldster offensive. Although I'm not quite ready to call myself elderly.

golfing eagles
09-27-2015, 08:30 AM
You called us oldsters?

A new guide for journalists warns against using terms which discriminate against people of a certain age.

'Senior', 'fossil' and 'biddy' have been blacklisted by the lexicon of unacceptable phrases, which has been compiled by an international think tank.
Instead, people aged over 50 should be referred to as 'older people' or simply 'man' or 'woman' followed by their age, the guide suggests.

'Old ladies' of both the 'little' and 'sweet' variety are also to be avoided, according to the report.

The guide says it aims to help journalists report stories about "older people" in a "fair contemporary and unbiased" manner.

The authors of the report state that 80 per cent of older Americans have been subjected to ageist stereotypes. "While names and characterizations may vary, the message is the same: older men and women are incompetent and lack sufficiency," the guide states.

Journalists are advised: "If you need to identify individuals over the age of 50, 'older adults' is preferred over 'senior' and 'elderly', which can be discriminatory in nature.

I agree with you. I don't find any of the above words including oldster offensive. Although I'm not quite ready to call myself elderly.

Call me anything you want, but don't call me late for dinner. I have little use for all the PC nonsense. Something is what it is, regardless of what you call it---"A rose by any other name"

leftyf
09-27-2015, 08:31 AM
Sad part is, you don't even know who these people are or what state they are in. They may be teenagers living up North some where or another country.

graciegirl
09-27-2015, 08:32 AM
You called us oldsters?

A new guide for journalists warns against using terms which discriminate against people of a certain age.

'Senior', 'fossil' and 'biddy' have been blacklisted by the lexicon of unacceptable phrases, which has been compiled by an international think tank.
Instead, people aged over 50 should be referred to as 'older people' or simply 'man' or 'woman' followed by their age, the guide suggests.

'Old ladies' of both the 'little' and 'sweet' variety are also to be avoided, according to the report.

The guide says it aims to help journalists report stories about "older people" in a "fair contemporary and unbiased" manner.

The authors of the report state that 80 per cent of older Americans have been subjected to ageist stereotypes. "While names and characterizations may vary, the message is the same: older men and women are incompetent and lack sufficiency," the guide states.

Journalists are advised: "If you need to identify individuals over the age of 50, 'older adults' is preferred over 'senior' and 'elderly', which can be discriminatory in nature.

I agree with you. I don't find any of the above words including oldster offensive. Although I'm not quite ready to call myself elderly.


The "Posse" has all those ageist terms written down in their headquarters where they fill up their squirt guns. Some of the posse are very thin skinned. They have just added seventy seven new recruits. It is not safe to poke fun at old-er people or talk down to them, marginalize them or try to be excluded from their amazing presence. They have super soakers and are very thin skinned. AND hair trigger. YOU COULD BE DRENCHED.

CFrance
09-27-2015, 08:52 AM
Some people think others are touchy, while others think some people are just plain rude.

Polar Bear
09-27-2015, 08:55 AM
Too broad and negative. I don't accept the premise. What the op speaks of certainly exists, but it applies to a very small minority of posters

tomwed
09-27-2015, 09:11 AM
The "Posse" has all those ageist terms written down in their headquarters where they fill up their squirt guns. Some of the posse are very thin skinned. They have just added seventy seven new recruits. It is not safe to poke fun at old-er people or talk down to them, marginalize them or try to be excluded from their amazing presence. They have super soakers and are very thin skinned. AND hair trigger. YOU COULD BE DRENCHED.
I'm completely bald. I find hair triggers hurtful. Can't you find a better name? And if I have a choice, soup or soakers--I'll take the soup. I have to roast my chicken legs now, I'll be back later.

2BNTV
09-27-2015, 09:12 AM
Having been on here for awhile, I think the forum has more posters who just like to say something negative as opossed to several years ago where people made friends and respected each others point of view. There was a time where almost everyone wanted to help all new posters and took the time and effort to respond to all newbies.

Agreeing to disagree respectfully, is something that doesn't happen a lot. Most people don't take the time to elucidate their point of view.

Some people may say, "insensitive clods" are welcomed, as their point of view is the "only" point of view. Maybe it's sensitive, old me.

Some people have left the forum because it wasn't worth the effort to read a lot of junk especially from people who have the attitude, "it's all about me" and what I say.

justjim
09-27-2015, 09:21 AM
Having been on here for awhile, I think the forum has more posters who just like to say something negative as opossed to several years ago where people made friends and respected each others point of view. There was a time where almost everyone wanted to help all new posters and took the time and effort to respond to all newbies.

Agreeing to disagree respectfully, is something that doesn't happen a lot. Most people don't take the time to elucidate their point of view.

Some people may say, "insensitive clods" are welcomed, as their point of view is the "only" point of view. Maybe it's sensitive, old me.

Some people have left the forum because it wasn't worth the effort to read a lot of junk especially from people who have the attitude, "it's all about me" and what I say.

Excellent post 2BNTV. :ho:

Lovey2
09-27-2015, 09:30 AM
:1rotfl:

Villager Joyce
09-27-2015, 09:33 AM
Post 3 under Need Help with Gas Stove Leak is a perfect example of what is wrong with ONLY A FEW of the posters on this forum, but enough to make one take pose before voicing an opinion.

golfing eagles
09-27-2015, 09:49 AM
Post 3 under Need Help with Gas Stove Leak is a perfect example of what is wrong with ONLY A FEW of the posters on this forum, but enough to make one take pose before voicing an opinion.

In that vein, read post #50 in the "Age Restrictions" thread of general discussion. Also post #15 and responses #17 and #18 in the "Did anyone go to the Ann Coulter signing" thread. As you can see, I agree with you 100%. I just hate to see some of this nation's markedly increased divisiveness sneak into "The Bubble"

joldnol
09-27-2015, 09:54 AM
Seems like there are a lot of touchy, thin skinned, people in TV based on a lot of posters comments. People always attacking someone for just stating their opinion on something. People reading a word or phrase as an insult to someone or something. It seems the PC epidemic has come to TV. It's like people are waiting to pounce on the next PC indiscretion. I thought oldsters were pretty much immune to words ruining their day considering that we have lived through all the challenges and crises in life. What ever happened to "live and let live"? Why can't people disagree and still be friendly? When did forums change from being a place to hear different perspectives on subjects to a venue to reinforce a group think position? Have forums morphed into nothing more than a Facebook page where only like minded "friends" are allowed in?:confused:

Bravo!

outlaw
09-27-2015, 11:41 AM
Post 3 under Need Help with Gas Stove Leak is a perfect example of what is wrong with ONLY A FEW of the posters on this forum, but enough to make one take pose before voicing an opinion.

That was a good one. I'm surprised no one suggested lighting a match to see if the smell was gas or something else.

golfing eagles
09-27-2015, 11:47 AM
That was a good one. I'm surprised no one suggested lighting a match to see if the smell was gas or something else.

Well, not YET anyway.

Bonnevie
09-27-2015, 11:49 AM
Having been on here for awhile, I think the forum has more posters who just like to say something negative as opossed to several years ago where people made friends and respected each others point of view. There was a time where almost everyone wanted to help all new posters and took the time and effort to respond to all newbies.

Agreeing to disagree respectfully, is something that doesn't happen a lot. Most people don't take the time to elucidate their point of view.

Some people may say, "insensitive clods" are welcomed, as their point of view is the "only" point of view. Maybe it's sensitive, old me.

Some people have left the forum because it wasn't worth the effort to read a lot of junk especially from people who have the attitude, "it's all about me" and what I say.


I totally agree. I don't think it helps that our leaders don't set a good example. the rhetoric among elected officials as well as the vitriolic talk shows on both sides doesn't model civil discussion.

tomwed
09-27-2015, 11:51 AM
Well, not YET anyway.
ooops--I got carried away

outlaw
09-27-2015, 12:00 PM
Maybe the title of the thread should be Thin Skined TOTVers not TVers since you are basing your opinion on TOTV comments.

Good point...but then I think about the guy with the baseball bat hitting the other guy's golf cart because he said he just ran a stop sign, or the chair saving bully in the square pushing the old man, or the woman who punched the other belligerent woman that was getting in her face (although I applaud her for that).

Polar Bear
09-27-2015, 12:33 PM
Good point...but then I think about the guy with the baseball bat hitting the other guy's golf cart because he said he just ran a stop sign, or the chair saving bully in the square pushing the old man, or the woman who punched the other belligerent woman that was getting in her face (although I applaud her for that).
Not condoning those acts of course, but...

Three instances of bad behavior in a community of 100,000+ people...go figure.

asianthree
09-27-2015, 12:40 PM
I have to say lately the posting seem to be a bit much. We question what people post and what People do. Where they live and how much they think they know. As long as it doesn't affect my life frankly I don't care. as the summer cools off and fall begins maybe our posts will be about how great the weather is. Oh wait then it will be about the snowbirds and those renters. The one thing that frogs forget is they probably rented at one time.

rubicon
09-27-2015, 12:49 PM
Seems like there are a lot of touchy, thin skinned, people in TV based on a lot of posters comments. People always attacking someone for just stating their opinion on something. People reading a word or phrase as an insult to someone or something. It seems the PC epidemic has come to TV. It's like people are waiting to pounce on the next PC indiscretion. I thought oldsters were pretty much immune to words ruining their day considering that we have lived through all the challenges and crises in life. What ever happened to "live and let live"? Why can't people disagree and still be friendly? When did forums change from being a place to hear different perspectives on subjects to a venue to reinforce a group think position? Have forums morphed nothing more than a Facebook page where only like minded "friends" are allowed in?:confused:

Outlaw: My point of view here considers that old saw " it depends on whose ox is being gored". It also depends on the combination/permutation of "sender" "receiver". Personally I'll take communication as it comes to me because understanding is the bigger issue. Agreement might be nice but
as stated in a previous post two people on different philosophical planes can never agree. a spendthrift is never going to agree with a frugal person. (Live today the heck with tomorrow vis a vis save for a rainy day). This leads to accepting such information without judgment but as pure communication ie. someone's thoughts on a matter

Personal Best Regards:

dillywho
09-27-2015, 12:58 PM
You called us oldsters?

A new guide for journalists warns against using terms which discriminate against people of a certain age.

'Senior', 'fossil' and 'biddy' have been blacklisted by the lexicon of unacceptable phrases, which has been compiled by an international think tank.
Instead, people aged over 50 should be referred to as 'older people' or simply 'man' or 'woman' followed by their age, the guide suggests.

'Old ladies' of both the 'little' and 'sweet' variety are also to be avoided, according to the report.

The guide says it aims to help journalists report stories about "older people" in a "fair contemporary and unbiased" manner.

The authors of the report state that 80 per cent of older Americans have been subjected to ageist stereotypes. "While names and characterizations may vary, the message is the same: older men and women are incompetent and lack sufficiency," the guide states.

Journalists are advised: "If you need to identify individuals over the age of 50, 'older adults' is preferred over 'senior' and 'elderly', which can be discriminatory in nature.

I agree with you. I don't find any of the above words including oldster offensive. Although I'm not quite ready to call myself elderly.

Reminds me of a friend's husband back home. He was a mechanic at the Cadillac dealership there and was telling us about some "elderly" lady that had come in. I asked him, "Pat, how old would you say she was?" He said, "Oh, about 40, I guess." I was in my mid-40's at the time, so I asked him if "elderly" meant me, too. He grinned and said, "No, I don't think of YOU as elderly." Several years later on a trip back to Amarillo, we ran into them in a restaurant. After our greetings, etc., I promptly asked him, "Pat, how does it feel being an "elderly" (40-something) person?":1rotfl:

Barefoot
09-27-2015, 01:18 PM
You called us oldsters?
A new guide for journalists warns against using terms which discriminate against people of a certain age.

I guess this means I have to stop referring to Village Residents (myself included) as Wrinklies?
I think we all need to have a sense of humor as we age and be able to laugh at ourselves.

:024: Forums are places where all can express their point of view, and other can opine on it.
I think we should take Forum Comments with a "grain of salt".
IMHO, it's the nature of Forums to be "rough and tumble" and we should try not to be overly sensitive.
And there is always the good old Ignore List if someone in particular is getting on your nerves.

CFrance
09-27-2015, 01:28 PM
I guess this means I have to stop referring to Village Residents (myself included) as Wrinklies?
I think we all need to have a sense of humor as we age and be able to laugh at ourselves.

:024: Forums are places where all can express their point of view, and other can opine on it.
I think we should take Forum Comments with a "grain of salt".
IMHO, it's the nature of Forums to be "rough and tumble" and we should try not to be overly sensitive.
And there is always the good old Ignore List if someone in particular is getting on your nerves.

Never been a fan of that term Wrinklies! How about Mature Adults? Oh wait...

Ecuadog
09-27-2015, 01:48 PM
I guess this means I have to stop referring to Village Residents (myself included) as Wrinklies?
...


Christie Wrinkley (as my wife calls her) is 61. Wrinklies ain't so bad.

tomwed
09-27-2015, 02:04 PM
I guess this means I have to stop referring to Village Residents (myself included) as Wrinklies?
I think we all need to have a sense of humor as we age and be able to laugh at ourselves.

:024: Forums are places where all can express their point of view, and other can opine on it.
I think we should take Forum Comments with a "grain of salt".
IMHO, it's the nature of Forums to be "rough and tumble" and we should try not to be overly sensitive.
And there is always the good old Ignore List if someone in particular is getting on your nerves.

I don't know if some older people can change.

In Catholic grade school you could easily get squashed physically or emotionally by a nun. We were forged to be resilient and sneak in a laugh or two without getting caught. I think very big families make you resilient too.

SALYBOW
09-27-2015, 02:26 PM
Perhaps the problem is the way in which the opinion is stated. It seems that this topic comes up often.
IMHO, there is a difference between criticism and critique. When I write something that that will be on the internet forvfer., I hope I am wise enough to couch it in kind, gracious way. Being Irish I try to use Irish Diplomacy which is defined as the ability to tell a man to go to hell so that he looks forward to making the trip. One does not have to demean another to state their opinion or their opposition. I would not think I have thin skin if I am offended by someone attacking me personally in public. I would consider them as rude. Possibly there are too many rude, negative remarks made here. We do not all have to agree on everything, or anything; we should, however, be adult enough to agree to disagree and go on enjoying the wonderful place God has gifted us to live.

SALYBOW
09-27-2015, 02:46 PM
Are we too thin skinned or are we too rude? We have visited this problem before but I believe it warrants being visited again, If I am going to say something on the internet, which will be there forever, I hope I use good old Irish Diplomacy whic is defined as the ability to tell a man to go to hell so that he looks forward to making the trip.
If one has a need to disagree with another person, action, or opinion hopefully it will be done graciously and will be accepted graciously.
In a disagreement the two sides just need to agree to disagree and get back to enjoying the beautiful place in which God has gifted us to live. chilout

Mikeod
09-27-2015, 05:10 PM
Are we too thin skinned or are we too rude? We have visited this problem before but I believe it warrants being visited again, If I am going to say something on the internet, which will be there forever, I hope I use good old Irish Diplomacy whic is defined as the ability to tell a man to go to hell so that he looks forward to making the trip.
If one has a need to disagree with another person, action, or opinion hopefully it will be done graciously and will be accepted graciously.
In a disagreement the two sides just need to agree to disagree and get back to enjoying the beautiful place in which God has gifted us to live. chilout
Yes, there are people on the board who don't understand that you can disagree without being disagreeable. It is eminently possible to criticize someone's opinion without also castigating the person. No matter who you are or where you are from, your opinion is just that, YOUR opinion, and of no more value than that.

manaboutown
09-27-2015, 05:36 PM
I guess this means I have to stop referring to Village Residents (myself included) as Wrinklies?
I think we all need to have a sense of humor as we age and be able to laugh at ourselves.

:024: Forums are places where all can express their point of view, and other can opine on it.
I think we should take Forum Comments with a "grain of salt".
IMHO, it's the nature of Forums to be "rough and tumble" and we should try not to be overly sensitive.
And there is always the good old Ignore List if someone in particular is getting on your nerves.


A woman attorney friend of mine grew up in Scottsdale, AZ back in the 60's (before sunscreen). She told me they used to refer to the older women who hung out at the pools taking in a lot of sun as "alligator ladies". She admitted it wasn't nice but alligator hide was pretty much what their skin looked like after years and years of sunbathing. I told her I thought that there were no alligators in Arizona...

SALYBOW
09-27-2015, 08:17 PM
Having been on here for awhile, I think the forum has more posters who just like to say something negative as opossed to several years ago where people made friends and respected each others point of view. There was a time where almost everyone wanted to help all new posters and took the time and effort to respond to all newbies.

Agreeing to disagree respectfully, is something that doesn't happen a lot. Most people don't take the time to elucidate their point of view.

Some people may say, "insensitive clods" are welcomed, as their point of view is the "only" point of view. Maybe it's sensitive, old me.

Some people have left the forum because it wasn't worth the effort to read a lot of junk especially from people who have the attitude, "it's all about me" and what I say.

Excellent and kind as usual Joe. Thank God for you. Maybe we should split out two groups like we did for politics, Those who wish to be rude if they want and those who do not want to hear it. That way neither group will have to wade through the others minutia.:BigApplause:

njbchbum
09-27-2015, 10:08 PM
Excellent and kind as usual Joe. Thank God for you. Maybe we should split out two groups like we did for politics, Those who wish to be rude if they want and those who do not want to hear it. That way neither group will have to wade through the others minutia.:BigApplause:

No need for another disparate group - just use the 'ignore' button and eliminate reading posts from those who upset you...no wading!

Jamespdunn45
09-28-2015, 04:45 AM
I always thought we should celebrate our differences - in reality and in beliefs. One of the most attractive parts of TV, for me, is that we have so many different people from varied background that we can interact with. Doesn't it really get down to giving each other dignity and respect? That is a non-negotiable.

fred53
09-28-2015, 05:15 AM
Seems like there are a lot of touchy, thin skinned, people in TV based on a lot of posters comments. People always attacking someone for just stating their opinion on something. People reading a word or phrase as an insult to someone or something. It seems the PC epidemic has come to TV. It's like people are waiting to pounce on the next PC indiscretion. I thought oldsters were pretty much immune to words ruining their day considering that we have lived through all the challenges and crises in life. What ever happened to "live and let live"? Why can't people disagree and still be friendly? When did forums change from being a place to hear different perspectives on subjects to a venue to reinforce a group think position? Have forums morphed into nothing more than a Facebook page where only like minded "friends" are allowed in?:confused:

*ahem*(no names here)are focusing on the negative aspects of forums...there are many back-and-froths here that aren't negative...perhaps focusing on them would be better...

Bay Kid
09-28-2015, 07:02 AM
PEACE and LOVE for all.

graciegirl
09-28-2015, 07:15 AM
I always thought we should celebrate our differences - in reality and in beliefs. One of the most attractive parts of TV, for me, is that we have so many different people from varied background that we can interact with. Doesn't it really get down to giving each other dignity and respect? That is a non-negotiable.



You are right. It is all how it is said. I think that this has a LOT to do with how we were raised and where we lived in our childhood. I think some people are generally far more direct on a day to day basis. different than the people who I grew up with in Ohio. Probably not different in their heart but in their style of speaking..

Just as Salybow said, it is a matter of diplomacy and tact and some can tell people to go to Hell and make them look forward to the trip.

What I hate among posters is the changing of their names. There are those who have been kicked off and continue to come back under a new name. It sometimes takes awhile for the Admin and moderators to find these returning troublemakers because there is software that can disguise a computer address. For the troublemakers, it is a game.

Jimturner
09-28-2015, 07:48 AM
You are right. It is all how it is said. I think that this has a LOT to do with how we were raised and where we lived in our childhood. I think some people are generally far more direct on a day to day basis. different than the people who I grew up with in Ohio. Probably not different in their heart but in their style of speaking..

Just as Salybow said, it is a matter of diplomacy and tact and some can tell people to go to Hell and make them look forward to the trip.

What I hate among posters is the changing of their names. There are those who have been kicked off and continue to come back under a new name. It sometimes takes awhile for the Admin and moderators to find these returning troublemakers because there is software that can disguise a computer address. For the troublemakers, it is a game.
Hate seems a little harsh. There are many reasons people change their names on web sites. Some as simple as picking a name that does not fit them or even misspelling. I would recommend paying attention to what people say and not what you may think they mean. I prefer to look for the good in everyone rather than make snap judgements of others."

graciegirl
09-28-2015, 07:52 AM
hate seems a little harsh. There are many reasons people change their names on web sites. Some as simple as picking a name that does not fit them or even misspelling. I would recommend paying attention to what people say and not what you may think they mean. I prefer to look for the good in everyone rather than make snap judgements of others."


But not so many reasons people are asked to leave a forum. And return with another name, over and over and over again.

CFrance
09-28-2015, 08:03 AM
Perhaps the problem is the way in which the opinion is stated. It seems that this topic comes up often.
IMHO, there is a difference between criticism and critique. When I write something that that will be on the internet forvfer., I hope I am wise enough to couch it in kind, gracious way. Being Irish I try to use Irish Diplomacy which is defined as the ability to tell a man to go to hell so that he looks forward to making the trip. One does not have to demean another to state their opinion or their opposition. I would not think I have thin skin if I am offended by someone attacking me personally in public. I would consider them as rude. Possibly there are too many rude, negative remarks made here. We do not all have to agree on everything, or anything; we should, however, be adult enough to agree to disagree and go on enjoying the wonderful place God has gifted us to live.

I find "Irish Diplomacy" to be disingenuous and ruder than just saying what you think straight out, minus any hurtful words or phrases. Irish Diplomacy could also be called manipulation, which to me is deceitful.

I would rather everyone be honest about how they feel.

Villager Joyce
09-28-2015, 08:04 AM
Hate seems a little harsh. There are many reasons people change their names on web sites. Some as simple as picking a name that does not fit them or even misspelling. I would recommend paying attention to what people say and not what you may think they mean. I prefer to look for the good in everyone rather than make snap judgements of others."

This is a great philosophy, but IMHO some people are just nastya$$ people.

graciegirl
09-28-2015, 08:07 AM
I find "Irish Diplomacy" to be disingenuous and ruder than just saying what you think straight out, minus any hurtful words or phrases. Irish Diplomacy could also be called manipulation, which to me is deceitful.

I would rather everyone be honest about how they feel.


Wait C.


Do you like my hat?
No it makes your face look broader and plays up the rosacea.


Irish Diplomacy.
Do you like my hat?
I have always loved red.

CFrance
09-28-2015, 08:24 AM
Ha ha, GG! Yes, I would prefer that to some cheesy end-around! Or rather, just say It's not my favorite thing that you've ever worn.

tomwed
09-28-2015, 08:58 AM
I think criticism can be sweetened up so that it goes down easier.

outlaw
09-28-2015, 01:07 PM
Hate seems a little harsh. There are many reasons people change their names on web sites. Some as simple as picking a name that does not fit them or even misspelling. I would recommend paying attention to what people say and not what you may think they mean. I prefer to look for the good in everyone rather than make snap judgements of others."

Good attitude.

rubicon
09-29-2015, 06:08 AM
I find "Irish Diplomacy" to be disingenuous and ruder than just saying what you think straight out, minus any hurtful words or phrases. Irish Diplomacy could also be called manipulation, which to me is deceitful.

I would rather everyone be honest about how they feel.

CFrance; I tend to agree with you. I lived in an area where the people were polite but less than honest. Honest conversation provides clarity but then some folks can't abide clarity or honesty.

A comment is made and the receiver feels/says you are being condescending.

Is it that the sender is being condescending or is it that the receiver has feeling of inferiority? Is it as the PC oriented individuals describe it a trigger warning or a micro-aggression? We have all heard that argument haven't we. S/he was being.............we all witness a different interpretation.

Again as stated in a previous post its also depends on whose ox is being gored...that contractor cheated me....stop complaining

graciegirl
09-29-2015, 06:28 AM
CFrance; I tend to agree with you. I lived in an area where the people were polite but less than honest. Honest conversation provides clarity but then some folks can't abide clarity or honesty.

A comment is made and the receiver feels/says you are being condescending.

Is it that the sender is being condescending or is it that the receiver has feeling of inferiority? Is it as the PC oriented individuals describe it a trigger warning or a micro-aggression? We have all heard that argument haven't we. S/he was being.............we all witness a different interpretation.

Again as stated in a previous post its also depends on whose ox is being gored...that contractor cheated me....stop complaining


What is difficult to ascertain on this forum is whether an ox is gored at all. When someone says that contractor cheated me, it well could be the guy that contractor fired last week who is posting. That is the danger of being anonymous. I am increasingly skeptical about negativity for that reason. Perhaps it isn't entirely honest to be diplomatic. I am becoming more direct and sometimes harsh on this forum and I don't like that.

Cedwards38
09-29-2015, 07:47 AM
It doesn't take long to figure out whose opinion concerns you and whose you ignore on this site, and in life in general. I'd guess that most of our reactions to the issues discussed in TOTV are pretty predictable. Once you see who is posting, you'll be able to predict the content and tone of the post.

Trying to understand the emotion of a statement when you can't hear it but can only read it can be difficult. I do think that Americans in general spend way too much time trying to prove to the world how much smarter they are than the next guy, and certainly that is true on TOTV.


As for "The Bubble," it doesn't exist. Never did. Never will. This is a great place to live because of the THINGS present in the community and the opportunity those present for all of us to enjoy life, but it's filled with people of diverse backgrounds, with diverse opinions, and diverse ways of interacting with others. That's just like everyplace else in the world. That cultural stew is disconcerting for some. For others, that's part of what makes The Villages, and the rest of the world, exciting!

EnglishJW
09-29-2015, 08:19 AM
The "Posse" has all those ageist terms written down in their headquarters where they fill up their squirt guns. Some of the posse are very thin skinned. They have just added seventy seven new recruits. It is not safe to poke fun at old-er people or talk down to them, marginalize them or try to be excluded from their amazing presence. They have super soakers and are very thin skinned. AND hair trigger. YOU COULD BE DRENCHED.

Since I am sure I will say something that is politically incorrect at some point (many points?) and will therefore be getting drenched, can you please select a very hot day? Thank you in advance.

Jima64
09-29-2015, 08:24 AM
What is difficult to ascertain on this forum is whether an ox is gored at all. When someone says that contractor cheated me, it well could be the guy that contractor fired last week who is posting. That is the danger of being anonymous. I am increasingly skeptical about negativity for that reason. Perhaps it isn't entirely honest to be diplomatic. I am becoming more direct and sometimes harsh on this forum and I don't like that.

I agee with you. So I try to read up on as many threads as possible and not take a posting as the gospel. Someone continously receiving negative reviews by many people raises a red flag. I do know what i will read when I see some of the names of the posters ahead of time. Sometimes I skip them entirely because they are so much a downer.

golfing eagles
09-29-2015, 08:25 AM
Since I am sure I will say something that is politically incorrect at some point (many points?) and will therefore be getting drenched, can you please select a very hot day? Thank you in advance.

Sometimes you can put out a very milder "feeler" post, kind of like dipping you toe in the water. That way you don't need the full rain suit and umbrella :1rotfl:

But don't try it on a political forum, I think they move right to the beheading

HimandMe
09-29-2015, 09:10 AM
Ive had people respond to things I said and been misinterpreted sometimes, sometimes they got it right. Unless we go on and on clarifying and adding emotion symbols, it's bound to happen.
We also share a computer, three of us at times...and once in awhile forget to change the name....it gets confusing. Sorry about that.
We like this forum. It's been helpful in so many ways. A few grouches doesn't change that but once in awhile I say "ouch".

tomwed
09-29-2015, 09:15 AM
The Thomas is not thinned skinned at all. Don't get me wrong, I love thin skin People. Some of them have rented my home.

mickey100
09-29-2015, 10:00 AM
It doesn't take long to figure out whose opinion concerns you and whose you ignore on this site, and in life in general. I'd guess that most of our reactions to the issues discussed in TOTV are pretty predictable. Once you see who is posting, you'll be able to predict the content and tone of the post.

Trying to understand the emotion of a statement when you can't hear it but can only read it can be difficult. I do think that Americans in general spend way too much time trying to prove to the world how much smarter they are than the next guy, and certainly that is true on TOTV.


As for "The Bubble," it doesn't exist. Never did. Never will. This is a great place to live because of the THINGS present in the community and the opportunity those present for all of us to enjoy life, but it's filled with people of diverse backgrounds, with diverse opinions, and diverse ways of interacting with others. That's just like everyplace else in the world. That cultural stew is disconcerting for some. For others, that's part of what makes The Villages, and the rest of the world, exciting!


Nicely said. Also, I haven't gone back and read all the previous posts, but the original post said something about political correctness. I do know one type of bashing and insulting that goes on, that has nothing to do with PC, and that is if anyone says something about The Villages that some people don't like, even if it is truthful. They are very defensive about The Villages, and their treatment of people who try to voice their opinions about aspects of The Villages that could be improved, go way overboard, not in a nice way.

tomwed
09-29-2015, 10:08 AM
nicely said. Also, i haven't gone back and read all the previous posts, but the original post said something about political correctness. I do know one type of bashing and insulting that goes on, that has nothing to do with pc, and that is if anyone says something about the villages that some people don't like, even if it is truthful. They are very defensive about the villages, and their treatment of people who try to voice their opinions about aspects of the villages that could be improved, go way overboard, not in a nice way.
.....

golfing eagles
09-29-2015, 10:09 AM
Nicely said. Also, I haven't gone back and read all the previous posts, but the original post said something about political correctness. I do know one type of bashing and insulting that goes on, that has nothing to do with PC, and that is if anyone says something about The Villages that some people don't like, even if it is truthful. They are very defensive about The Villages, and their treatment of people who try to voice their opinions about aspects of The Villages that could be improved, go way overboard, not in a nice way.

But it's not really a full TOTV football game experience unless we have a head cheerleader. Tends to balance some of the overstated "negative" posts. If a negative post is a legitimate and important concern, what better than a forum like this to bring it to light and debate it, maybe get it changed. And if it just nonsense, that gets pointed out as well. It's not a game of one on one, the majority of the posters will decide the difference.

dewilson58
09-29-2015, 11:22 AM
It doesn't take long to figure out whose opinion concerns you and whose you ignore on this site, and in life in general. I'd guess that most of our reactions to the issues discussed in TOTV are pretty predictable. Once you see who is posting, you'll be able to predict the content and tone of the post.

I need to start writing names down, evaluate by smiley faces and sad faces. I know what you are saying, but I just seem to forget who is who. I will start tomorrow................if I remember.

outlaw
09-29-2015, 11:37 AM
But it's not really a full TOTV football game experience unless we have a head cheerleader. Tends to balance some of the overstated "negative" posts. If a negative post is a legitimate and important concern, what better than a forum like this to bring it to light and debate it, maybe get it changed. And if it just nonsense, that gets pointed out as well. It's not a game of one on one, the majority of the posters will decide the difference.

Good point. But usually the cheerleaders don't tackle the opposing team's player.

rubicon
09-29-2015, 11:42 AM
What is difficult to ascertain on this forum is whether an ox is gored at all. When someone says that contractor cheated me, it well could be the guy that contractor fired last week who is posting. That is the danger of being anonymous. I am increasingly skeptical about negativity for that reason. Perhaps it isn't entirely honest to be diplomatic. I am becoming more direct and sometimes harsh on this forum and I don't like that.

GG;

Forgive the diversion but in my past life, attempting to test the veracity of people was a vital part of the job. it is difficult to do that without the benefit of body language. and if the perpetrator is conducting a farce by mail/email only then you do have to make a move to determine what the perp does next and like chess such moves help tell the story.

TOTV is an entirely different playing field and quite frankly the stakes not near as high for me. so I really don't care much if the person is telling the truth, a half truth. it is my way of saying I am not playing your game.
Many times I start out with "based on the fact you present" after reading your post perhaps i should start out every post with "based on the facts you present"

Personal best Regards>

golfing eagles
09-29-2015, 11:48 AM
Good point. But usually the cheerleaders don't tackle the opposing team's player.

If the opposing team is lucky, they do

rubicon
09-29-2015, 12:04 PM
It doesn't take long to figure out whose opinion concerns you and whose you ignore on this site, and in life in general. I'd guess that most of our reactions to the issues discussed in TOTV are pretty predictable. Once you see who is posting, you'll be able to predict the content and tone of the post.

Trying to understand the emotion of a statement when you can't hear it but can only read it can be difficult. I do think that Americans in general spend way too much time trying to prove to the world how much smarter they are than the next guy, and certainly that is true on TOTV.


As for "The Bubble," it doesn't exist. Never did. Never will. This is a great place to live because of the THINGS present in the community and the opportunity those present for all of us to enjoy life, but it's filled with people of diverse backgrounds, with diverse opinions, and diverse ways of interacting with others. That's just like everyplace else in the world. That cultural stew is disconcerting for some. For others, that's part of what makes The Villages, and the rest of the world, exciting!

Hi Cewards: In general I agree with what you say but I am not sure I understand your opening remarks "it doesn't take long to determine whose opinions concern you and whose you can ignore....????????


My practice is to read every post on a thread, sometimes some posts more than once. It isn't a matter of concern or agreement like or dislike, same old same old (same application). It is a matter of understanding. It is a matter of removing emotion and bias as best we can, and reaching pure thought before responding. And as to same old same old...same old same old can and often does take on a different meaning/result on different matters. I work hard at not dealing in absolutes so I am not prone to say I already know what XYZ poster is going to say because XYZ poster may have added or deleted something different/new to their opinion. Or in fact I have ignored XYZ posters comments so often i missed that XYZ stated......Shame on me

I have enjoyed your comments over the years

Personal Best Regards:

tomwed
09-29-2015, 12:21 PM
It doesn't take long to figure out whose opinion concerns you and whose you ignore on this site, and in life in general. I'd guess that most of our reactions to the issues discussed in TOTV are pretty predictable. Once you see who is posting, you'll be able to predict the content and tone of the post.

Trying to understand the emotion of a statement when you can't hear it but can only read it can be difficult. I do think that Americans in general spend way too much time trying to prove to the world how much smarter they are than the next guy, and certainly that is true on TOTV.


As for "The Bubble," it doesn't exist. Never did. Never will. This is a great place to live because of the THINGS present in the community and the opportunity those present for all of us to enjoy life, but it's filled with people of diverse backgrounds, with diverse opinions, and diverse ways of interacting with others. That's just like everyplace else in the world. That cultural stew is disconcerting for some. For others, that's part of what makes The Villages, and the rest of the world, exciting!
The thinned skin people are part of the melting pot, the thick skin people are part of the cultural stew. As for me, and you'll have to take my word on it, I'm just plain stocky.

graciegirl
09-29-2015, 01:30 PM
The thinned skin people are part of the melting pot, the thick skin people are part of the cultural stew. As for me, and you'll have to take my word on it, I'm just plain stocky.



A good person casts a decent shadow. That's what I say.

Cedwards38
09-29-2015, 01:48 PM
Hi Cewards: In general I agree with what you say but I am not sure I understand your opening remarks "it doesn't take long to determine whose opinions concern you and whose you can ignore....????????


My practice is to read every post on a thread, sometimes some posts more than once. It isn't a matter of concern or agreement like or dislike, same old same old (same application). It is a matter of understanding. It is a matter of removing emotion and bias as best we can, and reaching pure thought before responding. And as to same old same old...same old same old can and often does take on a different meaning/result on different matters. I work hard at not dealing in absolutes so I am not prone to say I already know what XYZ poster is going to say because XYZ poster may have added or deleted something different/new to their opinion. Or in fact I have ignored XYZ posters comments so often i missed that XYZ stated......Shame on me

I have enjoyed your comments over the years

Personal Best Regards:

Good point! So let me be more specific about my first statement. I ignore those persons who try to tell me to be quiet about an issue that is important to me. Even more specifically, I read all their comments but I ignore their advice. Their attempt to suppress my thoughts just makes me want to express them all the more, so I do. Thankfully there aren't many on here who try to do that, but from past experience, when I see them I know them.

tomwed
09-29-2015, 02:02 PM
A good person casts a decent shadow. That's what I say.
I'm a big fan of Steven Colbert.
�What does anybody want? Not to be alone. I think a performer gets on stage and says the things that are in his mind in his own particular way, to make a connection with the audience so he doesn�t feel so alone. And hopefully the audience feels the same way.�

Gems like the above quote resulted from a wonderful, insightful interview on the program �Witness� with a then-Colbearded Stephen and Fr. Thomas Rosica of the Salt and Light Catholic Media Foundation. The interview, which occurred in April of this year, offers a deeper understanding into how Stephen juggles his work as a satirist/comedian with his Catholic faith.
v=lF5tudIqN7w
I just watched this. I sure hope I'm not flip. By definition I am. I'm going to watch it again.

rubicon
09-30-2015, 04:32 AM
Good point! So let me be more specific about my first statement. I ignore those persons who try to tell me to be quiet about an issue that is important to me. Even more specifically, I read all their comments but I ignore their advice. Their attempt to suppress my thoughts just makes me want to express them all the more, so I do. Thankfully there aren't many on here who try to do that, but from past experience, when I see them I know them.

Cewards: Aah now that I understand. We do not have enough of individualism in this country today. I too like to be my own man. Again i work hard at not judging but pure thought for that exact reason and the only one I know who knows what lurks in the heart of man is the....Shadow

Personal Best Regards:

redwitch
09-30-2015, 06:08 AM
There have been posters here I truly have not liked and have hoped I would never meet in person. Some folks just ain't nice!

I know I try to stay balanced and get my point across (even in political) without denigrating an opposing view. Usually works unless you really hurt my feelings or are just downright mean to someone else. Then the white gloves get slipped into punching gloves but even then you'll usually still have to read between the lines to see how angry I am. Name calling is just sophomoric. As Sally has said, what we say here is here forever.

I won't dismiss a relatively new poster who disses a contractor, but I will watch the thread to see if others have also had bad experiences. The same goes with referrals. Even the best contractors have off days and the customer they can never satisfy.

I've also started threads that I knew would be contentious, such as the pain "drinking the Kool Aid" causes me. Even so, if it is important enough to my mind, I'm going to say it and not always as nicely as I should. Sometimes we just can't be kind, fair or balanced, especially when it is something that hits close to home.

outlaw
09-30-2015, 08:49 AM
Hi Cewards: In general I agree with what you say but I am not sure I understand your opening remarks "it doesn't take long to determine whose opinions concern you and whose you can ignore....????????


My practice is to read every post on a thread, sometimes some posts more than once. It isn't a matter of concern or agreement like or dislike, same old same old (same application). It is a matter of understanding. It is a matter of removing emotion and bias as best we can, and reaching pure thought before responding. And as to same old same old...same old same old can and often does take on a different meaning/result on different matters. I work hard at not dealing in absolutes so I am not prone to say I already know what XYZ poster is going to say because XYZ poster may have added or deleted something different/new to their opinion. Or in fact I have ignored XYZ posters comments so often i missed that XYZ stated......Shame on me

I have enjoyed your comments over the years

Personal Best Regards:

I'm guessing, but is the answer X=Y/Z ?