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tony
10-28-2008, 05:24 PM
From time to time you may have gotten the sense that the administrators struggle in the dark hallways behind the forum with some characters that defy description. I have likened it to feeling like Tommy Lee Jones' character in Men in Black. You know, he wrestles with all manner of aliens, and gets down and dirty with them, and a little slimy, too.

We thought we should offer you an example just too good to pass up.

Here is what came to us in our email today. I took out member's names.

You know, I have been thinking about it since you deleted our political quotes thread today and talking with (a member) about the censorship. . . . I have been generating entirely too many logins and responses for your website and I know that is what the site thrives on and you have done me nothing but dirty by reading and deleting my posts and my private messages I am sure, so.......**** you, all of you, take your damn website and stick it up your thought police asses.
And also, give a big **** you to (female member), (male member), (another mail member) and (another female member) and tell them all, I will see them at TV. **** you Jan and Tony!!


I have to tell you that this has irritated Jan and me extremely. We want to know how Darrel has escaped unscathed.

ConeyIsBabe
10-28-2008, 05:34 PM
One thing I've learned from hanging out in public forums for the last ten years is that we really know nothing about the people we communicate with..... we do not know what substance they are abusing. We do not know of their mental or physical pain. We do not know if they are mentally challenged or just plain mean :cus:

I sure hope I don't run into that person when/if I ever relocate to TV :yuck:

Peachie
10-28-2008, 05:37 PM
My gosh, Tony... how does this poster merit anonymity?

renielarson
10-28-2008, 05:59 PM
We respond from hurt in many different ways. For me (and others who I personally know), it is to fade and slide into the background. For others, it is to vent verbally with unacceptable language that I'm sure is regrettable once the anger subsides.

We all are human and have made poor decisions along our road of life. However, in my opinion, it's in bad taste as an administrator or anyone else, to exploit the mistakes of others. At times, anger can get the best of us and Tony...you aren't exempt. We all say (or post) things we regret at some time or another. I know you know what I'm saying.

My recommendation...delete this thread.

tkret
10-28-2008, 06:01 PM
Well, Tony, this sounds like something that should be kept on file in the event the poster means something when he/she says "tell them all, I will see them at TV." Sounds a little threatening to me.

dklassen
10-28-2008, 06:07 PM
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/3/3e/Angel-smiley.svg/50px-Angel-smiley.svg.png

Barefoot
10-28-2008, 06:10 PM
Tony, what an insight into the dark side of a member! :faint:

I had no idea you Admins had to put up with posts like this one. Scary as hell, actually.

Talk Host
10-28-2008, 06:14 PM
We respond from hurt in many different ways. For me (and others who I personally know), it is to fade and slide into the background. For others, it is to vent verbally with unacceptable language that I'm sure is regrettable once the anger subsides.

We all are human and have made poor decisions along our road of life. However, in my opinion, it's in bad taste as an administrator or anyone else, to exploit the mistakes of others. At times, anger can get the best of us and Tony...you aren't exempt. We all say (or post) things we regret at some time or another. I know you know what I'm saying.

My recommendation...delete this thread.

This was not a one time event.

And, Darrel.....Yah right! Hey, it's me, Jan, remember?

JohnnyM
10-28-2008, 06:23 PM
Since this person has been a frequent flier on this forum and has sent this type of slime to an Administrator, is he or she banned for life? If not, what punishment has been doled out to this person. JohnnyM

Pete
10-28-2008, 06:23 PM
Tony,
was the member who sent that email put in the time out room?
I was wondering if there will be a TOTV forum after the election is over, from what I have been reading lately it looks doubtful.
I still think it a good place and after the wounds heal it will be back, there will be scars, but it will be back. JMHO

tony
10-28-2008, 06:33 PM
Johnny,

I don't see any infraction of forum rules.

villages07
10-28-2008, 06:35 PM
Tony, Jan and Darrel (the angel)....

Yuk, that was ugly. :boxing2: Yes, emotions are running high and you guys have to make editorial decisions that don't always sit well with the person affected....but, this reaction was over the top. Such filthy language from someone who espouses opposite values.:cus:

If this were "Survivor", said person would be voted off the island. Then, there would be (more) peace in the Valley. :a040:
Hang in there.

PS...just read Tony's post...hmmm, interesting interpretation. So, a person can cuss out the admins and not be punished. OK, maybe if it was totally done in private and you guys are willing to let that occur. But, then to reprint (although edited) the PM for all to see and react and still not apply a ban....puzzling. But, it's your site to do with as you wish.

JohnnyM
10-28-2008, 06:43 PM
Okay, your call. You know of course this will leave you guys open for some real whoppers ahead if you let that kind of communication continue now that you went public with your no harm, no foul rule. Not from me of course!

tkret
10-28-2008, 06:47 PM
Tony, Jan and Darrel

You folks have given us a wonderful gift called "Talk of The Villages". As the old proverb says, No good deed goes unpunished!

rshoffer
10-28-2008, 07:08 PM
That gave me the creeps and I hear stuff like that on a pretty regular basis. I enjoy TOTV and tell everyone about it. Life's too short to take too serious.

samhass
10-28-2008, 08:03 PM
That is a terrible post. I guess Darrel is just to sweet to be included. If I were you, I'd be tempted to come out :boxing2:

Best Mom
10-28-2008, 08:13 PM
Would you guys run a board again if you knew it would be like this??

tony
10-28-2008, 08:51 PM
Yes.

I easily look by troublesome people and look toward the multitude of good and truly intelligent and sincere folks here.

tkret
10-28-2008, 09:09 PM
Yes.

I easily look by troublesome people and look toward the multitude of good and truly intelligent and sincere folks here.


" Keep in mind that our community is not composed of those who are already saints, but of those who are trying to become saints. Therefore let us be extremely patient with each other's faults and failures. "
Mother Teresa

Hyacinth Bucket
10-28-2008, 09:54 PM
Tony, Jan and Darrel,

I was very surprised to see a private message sent to you posted for all to read on TOTV. I do not know who the individual is but I will assume by there writing that others will be able to identify this person.

I do agree with what Bright wrote

"We respond from hurt in many different ways. For me (and others who I personally know), it is to fade and slide into the background. For others, it is to vent verbally with unacceptable language that I'm sure is regrettable once the anger subsides.

We all are human and have made poor decisions along our road of life. However, in my opinion, it's in bad taste as an administrator or anyone else, to exploit the mistakes of others. At times, anger can get the best of us and Tony...you aren't exempt. We all say (or post) things we regret at some time or another. I know you know what I'm saying.

My recommendation...delete this thread."

I also feel this thread should be deleted. You have written in the past in a vague way about the type of pm's you receive. I find that acceptable as there is no way to identify the writer(s) nor are you sharing a private message with everyone.

Curious did you get the person's okay to post their private message?

HB

tony
10-28-2008, 10:04 PM
That email was tantamount to a letter to the editor.

We saw no reason to keep it private, nor were we asked to keep it private.

The bigger question is should we privately reveal to those mentioned that they were mentioned?

Peachie
10-28-2008, 10:12 PM
Tony, I think it is a good idea that the people mentioned in that letter be informed of the animosity this person holds for them simply because of the tone of the letter. I hope Bright and HB that it was a heat of the moment thing also and that you are both right but I would also want to know if someone had a vendetta against me. Nice to have to worry about that, eh?

samhass
10-28-2008, 10:18 PM
I agree with Peachie. The letter was threatening and those named should be informed. I would also reveal the author to those named so they can act defensively should a situation arise.

Hyacinth Bucket
10-28-2008, 10:22 PM
I did not realize a letter sent to all of you was similar to a letter to the editor.

I feel that the people who were mentioned definitely should be notified. I also feel that after you notify them post that the people mentioned have been notified.

My reasoning for the second posting is that for those who were not mentioned, but thought it might be them - can breathe a sigh of relief.

Not knowing who the person is or their mental state just the fact that they stated the following -

"And also, give a big **** you to (female member), (male member), (another mail member) and (another female member) and tell them all, I will see them at TV. **** you Jan and Tony!!"

I feel it is your responsibility to inform them. I do not know if this person is letting off steam, if it is an idle threat or .... I feel the individuals named should make the decision what they want to do.

HB

Rokinronda
10-28-2008, 10:35 PM
OMG, what the heck is going on??!!! Please inform the folks named. This may be a serious threat. If you don't and something insane happens, could you possibly be liable for not contacting the proper authorities? Just my thoughts. How frightening that someone could get so vile........

Cassie325
10-28-2008, 10:42 PM
That email was tantamount to a letter to the editor.

We saw no reason to keep it private, nor were we asked to keep it private.

The bigger question is should we privately reveal to those mentioned that they were mentioned?


That is a tough call to make. If the person that wrote this note to you is remorseful at this point (now that it is made public) and sees the errors of their ways....well then perhaps it is not worth stirring the pot. The author of the letter certainly owes the two of you an apology....at the very least!

The other reason I might hesitate in revealing to those members they spoke of....well they too may be just as angry and react in the same way...but towards that person who sent the letter to you.

That will not help anyone! I think it would probably just make it worse....and then continue in a vicious circle. It just depends on the people mentioned....if they are calm and reasonable then you are probably safe....if they are EMOTIONAL....well it may just get them fired up...which won't help the situation....

I am not saying you should not have posted this...nor am I saying that you should remove it...it is very sad that debates and information on the political thread have upset someone so much that they come after you for making a decision to remove something!

This is a scary world at times isn't it...and sad...

Sgt Mac
10-29-2008, 12:50 AM
WOW. . . Not good and to the one that sent that very bad PM you need to go some were els and I hope you are far far away from TV and TOTV is not about this type of stuf nor are all the very very good people

Not Good grow up :ohdear:

Da Sgt

chelsea24
10-29-2008, 01:08 AM
I'm not going to debate if this letter should have been posted or not. Not my call. But I will say that since it was posted, you have a duty to inform the people named (privately) that they have been threatened. They have a right to know.

graciegirl
10-29-2008, 03:40 AM
I would guess that anyone reading this forum would have a pretty good idea of who the person is that wrote the letter. The people named would be a bigger question, since the letter writer in my opinion "took on" a good many folks.

The intensity of posts written in political gets down to pretty scary to me, and sometimes go beyond heated to hatred, at least to me as it appears in print.

I would like for you administrators to inform the people named in that letter, at least privately.

PLEASE.

Talk Host
10-29-2008, 06:05 AM
I would guess that anyone reading this forum would have a pretty good idea of who the person is that wrote the letter. The people named would be a bigger question, since the letter writer in my opinion "took on" a good many folks.

The intensity of posts written in political gets down to pretty scary to me, and sometimes go beyond heated to hatred, at least to me as it appears in print.

I would like for you administrators to inform the people named in that letter, at least privately.

PLEASE.

I think it would be a dangerous thing for you to "guess" who was the author of that letter. Additiionally, just because it came to us from a specific address, we cannot be legally certain who actually wrote the words. We were not there to see who was banging on the keyboard. However, if you happen to receive an email or PM from this address, and it contains any threating verbage, I would advise you to keep it, in the event it is needed in the future. Our file from this address was not empty when this current email arrived.

For the information of everyone concerned, once you receive a letter or an email, it becomes your property, for you to with as you please. This extends pretty far. If I write something and send it to you, it becomes your property. If you then send that same letter to Santa Claus, it is now your property and Santa Claus's property So, never, ever, put anything in writing that you will be sorry for later on. Santa may leave your some coal.

Hyacinth Bucket
10-29-2008, 08:04 AM
I did not realize that if I send a letter to someone it becomes their property to do with as they please. A Letter to the Editor I knew could be made public.

I reread the letter you posted and am not to sure of the law - if someone knows of a threat to someone else and does nothing I believe they are considered liable.

Do any of you feel you can make a judgment call as to what this person will do in the future? If not, than I think you are duty bound to inform the individuals.

Another suggestion - is to get legal counsel to protect yourselves and/or ask the police what is your responsibility.

A person can be remorseful over something they did, but not knowing the mental state of the individual or their background I would not presume what they may do in the future.

This person states they are moving to TV which means they may be in close contact with the individual(s) named - I do not want to guess what the interaction may or may not be when they meet and/or see the person they were and/or are angry with.

Please inform the people in the pm you received.

HB

tkret
10-29-2008, 08:14 AM
I reread the letter you posted

This person states they are moving to TV which means they may be in close contact with the individual(s) named - I do not want to guess what the interaction may or may not be when they meet and/or see the person they were and/or are angry with.


HB

Hello Hyacinth Bucket

I know that you indicated that you "reread the letter" which was posted and that you believe the person is "moving to TV". I don't see where the original letter indicates that the person isn't already IN The Villages. It states, in part, "...tell them all, I will see them at TV...". Perhaps someone knows if he/she is a resident even now.

ConeyIsBabe
10-29-2008, 10:51 AM
I agree with HB - that you should consider consulting law enforcement as to whether or not the email is "a threat" to individuals. It should be documented for everyone's safety and the offender needs to know that behavior is inappropriate and unacceptable.

ouma1938
10-30-2008, 03:15 PM
Tony, I love your quote. Is it original or did you read it somewhere?

GMONEY
10-30-2008, 03:31 PM
:bowdown: i am flabbergasted..

Best Mom
10-31-2008, 09:32 AM
I love Tony's quote too!:)

jjdees
11-01-2008, 06:23 AM
Tony, What political quotes thread is this guy referring to?

tony
11-01-2008, 06:54 AM
If I recall the one correctly a member was posting and answering, posting and answering. It turned into a blog. Nobody else was posting in the thread.

Best Mom
11-01-2008, 12:27 PM
I am referring to the one at the bottom of all of Tony's posts..."Sometimes a majority is ...