Spouse not "on board" with TV like I am!

[patfla06]

What do you do with a Spouse who is retirement age and doesn't seem himself being "retired" and "ready" for The Villages?
I am totally convinced!
And atually when I see how active you all are I get tired just thinking
about all there is to do!!

So I have booked a 4-night visit and hope that the friendliness and
activity help.

Any ideas?

Pat from Tampa

[Russ_Boston]

Depending on what 'spouse' is into you should gear it towards that.

Try:

Golf
Pickleball
tennis
running
biking
walking
dancing (all types)
crafts (all types)
card games
swimming (fitness or fun)
fishing
eating (OK everyone enjoys that!)
bocce
drive a golf cart everywhere on the campus
visit the hospital facilities
tour the church of your choice
take in a polo match
Do the trolley tour
Take a ride to nearby horse farms towards Ocala to see the surrounds.
Take a drive to see that everything you normally use is somewhere on campus or just off (stores, restaurants, etc.)


OK that should consume the 4 days:)

[Niels]

Besides all of the suggestions from Russ, I would get a listing of all the clubs that are in TV. Look the list over for anything your spouse may be interested in. TV has a club for almost anything. My wife and I have very different interests yet we both found several clubs on the list that we might like to join.

[graciegirl]

here, the landscaping and interesting architecture in the public areas and the immaculate condition of everything, but The Villages had me with the art education opportunities.

Everyone has something that they love to do and I believe that almost all of those things are here.

But I know that I couldn't be happy if my husband wasn't happy.

I hope that he falls in love with this lovely place like most people do.

[Avista]

HI Pat, We moved up here from Tampa Feb 2007. Lived in Carrollwood Village and enjoyed our life in Tampa. Friends in Tampa would ask, "Don't you like Tampa?" Well, yes we did, but once we spent time up here in The Villages, we knew we would enjoy this life style.

Our son graduated from Chamberlain and our daughter from Gaither. She was in their first graduating class. My husband still volunteers at Cracker Country at the State Fair Ground. Feel free to PM us.

[sunflower3630]

Pat ~ We're kind of in the same situation. We already are retired; we've been in Naples since 2005. I LOVE TV and I'm convinced I would love living there, but hubby has a few reservations. One concern is the weather - he loves the weather down here; for me, I'm really really ok with some colder weather in winter. I think he's afraid of the occasional frost. Ha! After a lifetime of snow, what's a little frost once in awhile?? He golfs and is afraid the t-times are hard to get. I'm sure that's not really the case as many have written to say that if you're flexible it won't be a problem in high season. He's also concerned about entertainment - we're fortunate to be close to places in Naples and Ft. Myers for great concerts. But with all that goes on every single day, I don't think that's a problem either. There are lots of concerts in TV with lots of variety. Anyway, I finally got him to agree to a Lifestyle Preview Visit for 6 nights in December, so I'm just putting it in God's hands. If it's meant to be, it will be. I can't wait to visit!! And I hope there are some great Christmas decorations to see, too! Will you be here for the TOTV December luncheon? I made sure to book our time around it so I can finally get to meet all the wonderful folks who do so much to help each other and the rest of us to see what TV lifestyle is really all about.
Here's good luck to both of us!! :beer3: Let's hope our hubbies fall in love with TV as we have!

[champion6]

Here's an electronic version of the list of The Villages clubs.
http://www.districtgov.org/images/ClubsListing.pdf

[jeffy]

Pat,

I know the feeling. We bought in 05 with the idea of moving in full time in 5 years. We made the mistake of coming down for two weeks in the summer of 05 and I just fell in love with TV. I nagged my wife non stop for 6 months before she finally agreed to move to TV full time. She had never lived outside Maryland. Our son and all the relatives were still in Maryland. It was a BIG move for her.

She gave me two conditions. One she could fly back to Md any time she wanted to visit with relatives and if after two years, she didnt like TV I would agree to move back.

We were not here even one month before she said that we were never going to move back. Originally she wanted nothing to do with golf or pickleball . Now she golfs 3 times a week and plays PB 5 times a week.

Her parents are now villagers as are mine now.

Once you get them down here , TV and the people win you over quick.

jeffy

[The Great Fumar]

Pat,

I know the feeling. We bought in 05 with the idea of moving in full time in 5 years. We made the mistake of coming down for two weeks in the summer of 05 and I just fell in love with TV. I nagged my wife non stop for 6 months before she finally agreed to move to TV full time. She had never lived outside Maryland. Our son and all the relatives were still in Maryland. It was a BIG move for her.

She gave me two conditions. One she could fly back to Md any time she wanted to visit with relatives and if after two years, she didnt like TV I would agree to move back.

We were not here even one month before she said that we were never going to move back. Originally she wanted nothing to do with golf or pickleball . Now she golfs 3 times a week and plays PB 5 times a week.

Her parents are now villagers as are mine now.

Once you get them down here , TV and the people win you over quick.

jeffy

The above story is a carbon copy of what happened to me ....Our whole life's have totally changed........We can't believe the change in each other...

Soooo !!!! If he won't move , unload him , HE'S NUTS

fumar ..chilout

[kofficer]

You have never seen anything like The Villages. We went there for a short weekend in August and simply feel in love with the atmosphere. It's not just friendly, it feels safe and comfortable, not to mention all the things there are too do. If you ever lived in a smaller town, you will get that feeling also. Yet, everything you could possibly want (and lots of things you never thought of) are here. We are going back up for our 4-day for Thanksgiving. I dragged my wonderful husband in August, and living in the Villages when we can retire in a couple of years, is now, a very daily event. He just loves the place.

You won't have to convince him, The Villages speaks to you without any prompting.

Richard and Lee, Tampa

[Barefoot]

What do you do with a Spouse who is retirement age and doesn't seem himself being "retired" and "ready" for The Villages?
Pat from Tampa

You do what many of us have done. Buy a home in TV and your husband can visit you. :girlneener:

[RichieLion]

I've heard this story so many times I've lost count. It seems there are many here whose spouse was very skeptical of a "Villages Life". The thing is; they all live here. So just bring your spouse down and explore and tour The Villages and I figure he'll be sold before the first day is done.

[pooh]

I was the one who had doubts about living in The Villages. Hubby had seen so many ads for the community. He asked if I'd like to retire there. "I'm not hanging around with a bunch of old people," said I. Well, we flew out from CA to visit our son and his family in Sarasota. Took a ride up to see the place, spent some time with a sales rep and headed back to Sarasota. I was absolutely sold in just 6 hours. Made one more trip up to visit about 5 days later, before heading back west. That day we told the sales rep we were going to buy, what model we wanted, what we wanted as far as land, etc. Think we spent a total of 8 hours before we decided this place was the greatest place to live. Took about 4 months to find a house that met our criteria and we moved here permanently 8 months later.

When your hubby visits, he'll see what it's like here. You can't really describe the community, the feeling of family, the beauty, the fun, the activities, the SIZE, but still having that small town feeling....he'll really love it.

Good luck and have a wonderful visit.

[Taj44]

Acutally, depending on what type of golf he plays, there well may be a problem getting on golf courses, particularly if it is championship golf. It was borderline dicey last February and March, and of course they've sold quite a few new homes since then , i.e. many new Villagers, but there are NO additional championship golf courses. My suggestion would be to rent a month and see if you like it.

[nONIE]

Patfla,

You sound like you are describing my husband to a tee! (play on words)

It took a couple of years and a lot of begging and pleading to get him to see things my way. After 2 winter visits of being in The Villages I think he was sold. The Villages sells itself and I should have not wasted my breath.
Just wanted you to know you are not alone, alot of us have been thru this , and I did get to the point where I had to tell him , OK then you can visit me as often as possible. I think with a statement like that, they know we mean business! LOL!

[smalldog]

Smalldog Sez,
it took my wife almost 2 years before she really got on board for The Villages ..... it is just to big and overwhelming for some small town people:cryin2:........... she doesn't play golf( she says I came here to play golf but I play golf because I came here :smiley:) ...... anyhow she finally has some neighborhood friends and some people from church and the future looks much brighter :wave: ............ but it does take time:sigh:

[patfla06]

Thanks for all the good advice.

I have booked a 4 night stay and think once he "lives" the Villages he will be sold.

The thing that makes me laugh is some of you have moved over 1,000 miles and no problem.
We only have to move an hour!
We came to Tampa in the late 90's. I think we already did the hard move.

Looking forward to our visit.

[Niels]

It's funny how some people's perception of TV changes after they visit. I knew my wife never wanted to live in a retirement community so when we first visited I didn't tell her it was a retirement community. :lipsrsealed: We came up from Orlando to visit for 3 hours. She liked the place and we decided to visit for 6 days later in the year. Now we're preparing to move to TV.