How to Handle Unwanted House Guests?

[salpal]

We just moved to TV six weeks ago. Of course before we moved, many friends said they would come and visit and they are most welcome when that happens.

However, I have a single friend that I saw very infrequently. who has contacted me several times before we moved and a few after we have moved (mostly via email). She keeps saying she is coming down to visit this winter.

First of all, no one invited her and secondly we really do not want to entertain her. I am sure this has happened to at least one of you...how do you handle? I hate to say "Hey, I don't want you here."

[Larryandlinda]

We just moved to TV six weeks ago. Of course before we moved, many friends said they would come and visit and they are most welcome when that happens.

However, I have a single friend that I saw very infrequently. who has contacted me several times before we moved and a few after we have moved (mostly via email). She keeps saying she is coming down to visit this winter.

First of all, no one invited her and secondly we really do not want to entertain her. I am sure this has happened to at least one of you...how do you handle? I hate to say "Hey, I don't want you here."

RAID works on small pests, Massey does a good job too.

Though it might be awkward you could be the dysfunctional hosts and provide the weekend from the dark side she will never want to experience again or make sure it's a work party weekend
LandL

[SALYBOW]

Just tell her that your winter really filled up fast. Just don't tell her with what.:)

[graciegirl]

You might suggest she come down on the lifestyle visit.:undecided:

Boy Howdy. That is awkward. :sad:

[EdV]

I would send her an e-mail and list the hotels that are in TV. Then I would talk about the TV Lifestyle Preview and tell her that it’s the best way to see and do everything in TV for a great rate (include a link to the website). Then I’d close by telling her how busy you and your spouse are with all the clubs you belong to but that you hope to be able to meet her for lunch one day when she’s down.

She should get the message.

[kfierle]

I would give her the number of the Waterfront or suggest a lifestyle visit. Tell her you are just not ready to entertain guests in you house yet.

[Barefoot]

It's amazing how many friends you suddenly have when you buy a house in Florida. :22yikes:

I just tell unwanted visitors that we're already overbooked for the season. Short and simple.

[Boomer]

I would send her an e-mail and list the hotels that are in TV. Then I would talk about the TV Lifestyle Preview and tell her that it’s the best way to see and do everything in TV for a great rate (include a link to the website). Then I’d close by telling her how busy you and your spouse are with all the clubs you belong to but that you hope to be able to meet her for lunch one day when she’s down.

She should get the message.

I have already practiced this one in the mirror for when I am there.

My plan is what Ed says here. But I will leave out the part about being busy.

Just send her the suggestions on where to stay and the stuff about the Lifestyle Preview. Tell her you will be happy to meet for lunch -- or even dinner. But don't fill in any more blanks than necessary. Pushy people who like to freeload have really thick skin so you may have to repeat the procedure.

We all know what Ben Franklin said about fish and company stinking after 3 days. But there are some that you don't want to give even 3 hours. Give this type an inch and they will take a mile.

I absolutely love Erma Bombeck's writing. (She was from Ohio, too.) I remember somewhere in something she wrote where she talked about some people she met one time at a VFW dance showing up to stay with her. It can happen.

Now, go practice this in the mirror.

Boomer (who is actually quite polite and nice, but knows one when she sees one)

[graciegirl]

Someone said that she greets all guests at the door with an air mattress with a leak.

We have a sofa bed left over from the inquisition.

The air conditioning vent can be closed in some bedrooms.

I just wish someone would ask to come visit us.

I know. Be careful what you wish for.

[dfn8tly]

Send her a copy of the blog about the scorpions and snakes. I'll bet she stays home.

[nONIE]

Ohhhhhh can I sympathize with you!!

It has taken me years to get up the nerve to tell people that it just isnt a good time. I have a tendency to give 5 million reasons why its not a good time but I really dont think any of them are necessary.

I think its so rude of people to just assume that you want them to visit and you will be happy to entertain them. my inability to cook and my less then 0 desire to learn how kind of puts them off, thank goodness. LOL!:evil6:

[l2ridehd]

I just say great! Let me know the dates, I got a truck load of cement blocks and a load of mulch that I can use some help moving. The blocks need to go from the driveway to the back and of course the mulch needs to be spread. Was planning to do it alone, but with your help I will order the new shrubs as well so we can dig the holes and plant them. Shouldn't take more then a week.

[gemlady]

Ignore her E Mails and she will eventually go away.

[Pats2010]

America's friendliest Hometown? :shrug:

[jannd228]

America's friendliest Hometown? :shrug:

I know this thread is unusual, I am a single person but I would never ask for an invite from a married friend but then I lived on Cape Cod and I know about unwanted "drop in" guests

[pooh]

America's friendliest Hometown? :shrug:
LOL....does sound strange to say this is America's Friendliest Home Town and talk is about how to keep away unwanted guests. It is a problem, though.

[joannej]

Here's a good excuse: "Our area is on a precautionary water boil alert!"

[Tweety Bird]

here's an idea... tell her you're not set up for company during such and such time because your (son, or whoever) is staying in the guest room during the months of such and such. I like the "ignore the emails one".

[nONIE]

America's friendliest Hometown? :shrug:

I know its sounds very weird being Americas friendliest hometown ,but I think in so many cases people get so involved in classes and activities in The Villages that there is literally no time for entertaining. Of course I am speaking for only some of us, Im sure there are many people in TV that really love entertaining friends and relatives. Mabe we could hear from some of them????

And a BIG factor is, who it is thats coming to visit. Lets face it , there are many people that want to visit you who make horrible houseguests.

[JUREK]

Ignore her E Mails and she will eventually go away.

On our last trip down to TV we had a couple who planned on us taking them to all the open houses and then showing them a good time. All this was going to happen on our two week vacation. Their phone calls and emails were ignored. I love them as friends but I want my vacation also.:beer3::beer3:

[graciegirl]

I like to have house guests.........most of the time and certain ones more than others...but the houses here really aren't set up for luxurious stays of more than a couple of days. We put our house guests in our basement here in Cincinnati and please don't think that is as bad as it sounds. They have complete privacy and there is a bedroom with TV, a living room with TV,a bathroom, and a mini kitchen.

That is great for them and for us because entertaining a non family member for 12 hour stints is tiring for all. So they can get away from us and we can get away from them and the kitties are not bothering them and we can meet again in the morning refreshed after we both have had our coffee.

It is a different thing here where we are all a little closer than that. It is hard to have someone in your house if you don't sleep well or they don't.

I wish someone would think of how this can be handled without hurting people's feelings.

[Barefoot]

I just say great! Let me know the dates, I got a truck load of cement blocks and a load of mulch that I can use some help moving. The blocks need to go from the driveway to the back and of course the mulch needs to be spread. Was planning to do it alone, but with your help I will order the new shrubs as well so we can dig the holes and plant them. Shouldn't take more then a week.

12ridehd ... I love your solution!

[Pturner]

I would send her an e-mail and list the hotels that are in TV. Then I would talk about the TV Lifestyle Preview and tell her that it�s the best way to see and do everything in TV for a great rate (include a link to the website). Then I�d close by telling her how busy you and your spouse are with all the clubs you belong to but that you hope to be able to meet her for lunch one day when she�s down.

She should get the message.

I like it. It's honest and direct. If fits the particular situation Salpal described, i.e., an ill-mannered acquaintance who invited herself. Saying, "it's not a good time," only kicks the ball down the field.

We have invited family and friends to visit and enjoy when they come. That's friendly. Letting anyone whom you know impose on you at-will is neither sincere nor friendly. It's foolish. At least, that's how I see it.

[graciegirl]

I like it. It's honest and direct. If fits the particular situation Salpal described, i.e., an ill-mannered acquaintance who invited herself. Saying, "it's not a good time," only kicks the ball down the field.

We have invited family and friends to visit and enjoy when they come. That's friendly. Letting anyone whom you know impose on you at-will is neither sincere nor friendly. It's foolish. At least, that's how I see it.

You are right...as usual.

[salpal]

Thanks for the answers and the jokes. I think I will follow the advice to steer her to the lifestyle preview. I believe she is more interested in TV than in our friendship because she keeps asking me alot of questions. Several questions are about the singles scene in TV. Being married and here all of six weeks, that is an easy one for me to answer her: "I don't know".

It is still amazing to me that prior to our move, I saw this woman maybe two or three times a year. She is a friend of a friend, a nice person, but very tiresome to be around for more than a couple of hours.

As far as other visitors - our good friends are welcome and we have to welcome the relatives...

[ajbrown]

Just tell her that your winter really filled up fast. Just don't tell her with what.:)

I like this best as it is very vague, it is not a lie and it is a good intro into a line like "You will love the TV, I can help you find a place". You could always use my lovely wife's technique simply saying "you know Alan, he loves his friends, just not in his house". I am quite comfortable under the bus BTW.

That said, in case any of my friends read TOTV and would like to visit me in TV, I would never do this to you :angel:

This has yet to happen to us, but my friends are told that the clock starts ticking when they arrive and at 5 nights we enter a probation period and no guests are allowed to stay more than two weeks. It is said with a sense of humor, tongue in cheek, but I think they understand.

[LB]

We are available for three weeks starting 7-26-10. Does the offer include golf cart and food? I know you are going to be a gracious host. Please send your address. We so look forward to seeing you! :BigApplause:

Just kidding. Got your attention I bet. Regards LB & LB

[mulligan]

Why not tell her about this website?? 27 posts on this subject should be enough of a hint.

[kentucky blue]

America's friendliest Hometown? :shrug:

Since we are talking about "America's Friendilest Hometown" you have to let her visit.BUT...............tell her upfront you can't pick her up at the airport,since your mechanic couldn't fix your brakes, so he just made your horn louder. After dinner that first night, put all your plates on the floor and have your dog lick them clean.Then neatly stack them up and put them back in the kitchen cabinets.Ask her if she would like dessert and coffee, or give her The Waterfront's phone number and see how quickly she leaves.Make sure she doesn't step on any of the mousetraps you have strategically placed throughout the house.That should do the trick, don't believe she will ever be back.One last thought about mousetraps...................the early bird may get the worm,but it's the second mouse that gets the cheese.

:evil6::welcome::rolleyes:

[K9-Lovers]

After dinner that first night, put all your plates on the floor and have your dog lick them clean.Then neatly stack them up and put them back in the kitchen cabinets.

Eewwww! :yuck:

[getdul981]

We just moved to TV six weeks ago. Of course before we moved, many friends said they would come and visit and they are most welcome when that happens.

However, I have a single friend that I saw very infrequently. who has contacted me several times before we moved and a few after we have moved (mostly via email). She keeps saying she is coming down to visit this winter.

First of all, no one invited her and secondly we really do not want to entertain her. I am sure this has happened to at least one of you...how do you handle? I hate to say "Hey, I don't want you here."

Salpal - Unless she has said something in e-mails that you haven't posted here, it doesn't say that she wants to stay with you.

I'd e-mail her back and tell her to let you know where she will be staying and maybe you can have a lunch or dinner together. I read that to be that she will coming down to visit TV. Who knows, you might be going on a cruise at just precisely the same time she is planning on coming.:icon_wink::icon_wink:

We have friends that live in Orlando and whenever we would visit Orlando, we would e-mail them, but had no intention of staying with them. We would get together a time or two while we were there, but no staying with.

[brostholder]

Rotflmao!!!!

[Barefoot]

After dinner that first night, put all your plates on the floor and have your dog lick them clean.Then neatly stack them up and put them back in the kitchen cabinets.

Well Holy Hat! And I thought that was the correct way to clean plates. I learn new stuff all the time from this website. :girlneener:

[nONIE]

Friends of ours( aggrevating houseguests) went to visit other friends in Orlando. They called us from Orlando and said their friends house was full of cocaroaches, in, the cuboards, drawers, closets, you name it. Well, they left in a big hurry and said they will never go back there. Problem was, they called us and wanted to come to The Villages, I went into a panic attack and shot 50 excuses at them why they couldnt visit us.

Some people sure take it to extremes! :ohdear:

[Boomer]

Nonie,

You need to find out where the people in Orlando bought those plastic bugs.

Boomer

[getdul981]

Nonie,

You need to find out where the people in Orlando bought those plastic bugs.

Boomer

Or was it Disney Animation?