COVID19 Rules

[Bjeanj]

In case you don’t know the COVID RULES:.....

The Rules:
1. Basically, you can't leave the house for any reason, but if you have to, then you can.

2. Masks are useless, but maybe you have to wear one, it can save you, it is useless, but maybe it is mandatory as well.

3. Stores are closed, except those that are open.

4. You should not go to hospitals unless you have to go there. Same applies to doctors, you should only go there in case of emergency, provided you are not too sick.

5. This virus is deadly but still not too scary, except that sometimes it actually leads to a global disaster and kills people.

6. Gloves won't help, but they can still help.

7. Everyone needs to stay HOME, but it's important to GO OUT.

8. There is no shortage of groceries in the supermarket, but there are many things missing when you go there in the evening, but not in the morning. Sometimes.

9. The virus has no effect on children except those it affects.

10. Animals are not affected, but there is still a cat that tested positive in Belgium in February when no one had been tested, 17 dogs in China, plus a few tigers here and there…

11. You will have many symptoms when you are sick, but you can also get sick without symptoms, have symptoms without being sick, or be contagious without having symptoms. Oh, my..

12. In order not to get sick, you have to eat well and exercise, but eat whatever you have on hand and it's better not to go out, well, but no…

13. It's better to get some fresh air, but you get looked at very wrong when you get some fresh air, and most importantly, you don't go to parks or walk. But don’t sit down, except that you can do that now if you are old, but not for too long or if you are pregnant (but not too old).

14. You can't go to retirement homes, but you have to take care of the elderly and bring food and medication.

15. If you are sick, you can't go out, but you can go to the pharmacy.

16. You can get restaurant food delivered to the house, which may have been prepared by people who didn't wear masks or gloves. But you have to have your groceries decontaminated outside for 3 hours. Pizza too?

17. Every disturbing article or disturbing interview starts with " I don't want to trigger panic, but…"

18. You can't see your older mother or grandmother, but you can take a taxi and meet an older taxi driver.

19. You can walk around with a friend but not with your family if they don't live under the same roof.

20. You are safe if you maintain the appropriate social distance, but you can’t go out with friends or strangers at the safe social distance.

21. The virus remains active on different surfaces for two hours, no, four, no, six, no, we didn't say hours, maybe days? But it takes a damp environment. Oh no, not necessarily.

22. The virus stays in the air - well no, or yes, maybe, especially in a closed room, in one hour a sick person can infect ten, so if it falls, all our children were already infected at school before it was closed. But remember, if you stay at the recommended social distance, however in certain circumstances you should maintain a greater distance, which, studies show, the virus can travel further, maybe.

23. We count the number of deaths but we don't know how many people are infected as we have only tested so far those who were "almost dead" to find out if that's what they will die of…

24. We have no treatment, except that there may be one that apparently is not dangerous unless you take too much (which is the case with all medications).

25. We should stay locked up until the virus disappears, but it will only disappear if we achieve collective immunity, so when it circulates… but we must no longer be locked up for that?

26. If you’re an essential employee and get sick it has nothing to do with your essential job. Unless you work in healthcare and then you’re covered by workers compensation.

27. The tests are not accurate anyway and have many false negatives so go by symptoms just to be safe. But if you don’t have a verified positive Covid test, you don’t really have it. Go back to work, its safe.

28. The WHO is the leading agency on covid facts. Except that time they said there is no risk of human to human transmission. And a few other facts about transmission to animals or no risk of traveling. But China said it was so, so it must have been true...

[JerryP]

“It ain't over 'til it's over."
Yogi B.

[anothersteve]

In case you don’t know the COVID RULES:.....

The Rules:
1. Basically, you can't leave the house for any reason, but if you have to, then you can.

2. Masks are useless, but maybe you have to wear one, it can save you, it is useless, but maybe it is mandatory as well.

3. Stores are closed, except those that are open.

4. You should not go to hospitals unless you have to go there. Same applies to doctors, you should only go there in case of emergency, provided you are not too sick.

5. This virus is deadly but still not too scary, except that sometimes it actually leads to a global disaster and kills people.

6. Gloves won't help, but they can still help.

7. Everyone needs to stay HOME, but it's important to GO OUT.

8. There is no shortage of groceries in the supermarket, but there are many things missing when you go there in the evening, but not in the morning. Sometimes.

9. The virus has no effect on children except those it affects.

10. Animals are not affected, but there is still a cat that tested positive in Belgium in February when no one had been tested, 17 dogs in China, plus a few tigers here and there…

11. You will have many symptoms when you are sick, but you can also get sick without symptoms, have symptoms without being sick, or be contagious without having symptoms. Oh, my..

12. In order not to get sick, you have to eat well and exercise, but eat whatever you have on hand and it's better not to go out, well, but no…

13. It's better to get some fresh air, but you get looked at very wrong when you get some fresh air, and most importantly, you don't go to parks or walk. But don’t sit down, except that you can do that now if you are old, but not for too long or if you are pregnant (but not too old).

14. You can't go to retirement homes, but you have to take care of the elderly and bring food and medication.

15. If you are sick, you can't go out, but you can go to the pharmacy.

16. You can get restaurant food delivered to the house, which may have been prepared by people who didn't wear masks or gloves. But you have to have your groceries decontaminated outside for 3 hours. Pizza too?

17. Every disturbing article or disturbing interview starts with " I don't want to trigger panic, but…"

18. You can't see your older mother or grandmother, but you can take a taxi and meet an older taxi driver.

19. You can walk around with a friend but not with your family if they don't live under the same roof.

20. You are safe if you maintain the appropriate social distance, but you can’t go out with friends or strangers at the safe social distance.

21. The virus remains active on different surfaces for two hours, no, four, no, six, no, we didn't say hours, maybe days? But it takes a damp environment. Oh no, not necessarily.

22. The virus stays in the air - well no, or yes, maybe, especially in a closed room, in one hour a sick person can infect ten, so if it falls, all our children were already infected at school before it was closed. But remember, if you stay at the recommended social distance, however in certain circumstances you should maintain a greater distance, which, studies show, the virus can travel further, maybe.

23. We count the number of deaths but we don't know how many people are infected as we have only tested so far those who were "almost dead" to find out if that's what they will die of…

24. We have no treatment, except that there may be one that apparently is not dangerous unless you take too much (which is the case with all medications).

25. We should stay locked up until the virus disappears, but it will only disappear if we achieve collective immunity, so when it circulates… but we must no longer be locked up for that?

26. If you’re an essential employee and get sick it has nothing to do with your essential job. Unless you work in healthcare and then you’re covered by workers compensation.

27. The tests are not accurate anyway and have many false negatives so go by symptoms just to be safe. But if you don’t have a verified positive Covid test, you don’t really have it. Go back to work, its safe.

28. The WHO is the leading agency on covid facts. Except that time they said there is no risk of human to human transmission. And a few other facts about transmission to animals or no risk of traveling. But China said it was so, so it must have been true...

That's it in a very large nutshell
Steve

[alwann]

Covid-19

The mobile phone guys say 5G technology has nothing to do with it. But we know they tell lies.

[justjim]

OP, your list is almost as frustrating and confusing as my golf game was on Monday.

[Bjeanj]

OP, your list is almost as frustrating and confusing as my golf game was on Monday.

Yes, but is it wrong?
:-)

[OrangeBlossomBaby]

Yes, but is it wrong?
:-)

Your list is the list of someone who wants to pretend that he doesn't understand the rules. Or someone who is sincerely SO ignorant that he actually doesn't understand the rules.

The rules are simple:

Accept that this IS a pandemic, it IS deadly, it IS contagious.
Accept that gloves and masks and social distancing CAN reduce your RISK of contracting it.
Accept that precautions are not 100% guaranteed to eliminate risk, but merely to reduce it.

The end.

[Velvet]

OP, you have me in tears, laughing. This is the FUN thread.

[anothersteve]

Your list is the list of someone who wants to pretend that he doesn't understand the rules. Or someone who is sincerely SO ignorant that he actually doesn't understand the rules.

The rules are simple:

Accept that this IS a pandemic, it IS deadly, it IS contagious.
Accept that gloves and masks and social distancing CAN reduce your RISK of contracting it.
Accept that precautions are not 100% guaranteed to eliminate risk, but merely to reduce it.

The end.

Me thinks someone need to relax a bit
Steve

[photo1902]

Me thinks someone need to relax a bit
Steve

Exactly!

[OrangeBlossomBaby]

Me thinks someone need to relax a bit
Steve

If I didn't know that some members of this forum sincerely had that attitude about COVID-19, I'd relax. Sadly, there are people here who will say, or think, "see, THIS is why I think all this is nonsense and we need to mingle again and hang out with each other and hug and shake hands and crowd the squares. Because this OP's post is spot-on - the whole thing makes no sense, therefore we should just ignore it all!"

There are people who still think that. I run into them every day that I work.

[anothersteve]

If I didn't know that some members of this forum sincerely had that attitude about COVID-19, I'd relax. Sadly, there are people here who will say, or think, "see, THIS is why I think all this is nonsense and we need to mingle again and hang out with each other and hug and shake hands and crowd the squares. Because this OP's post is spot-on - the whole thing makes no sense, therefore we should just ignore it all!"

There are people who still think that. I run into them every day that I work.

Again....relax...take some deep breaths as long as you can, and take the OP's post tongue in cheek, try to laugh, or smile at least. It's not the end of the world.
Steve

[Bjeanj]

Just to reassure anyone who needs reassuring, this was posted because I thought it was funny, not because I thought it was supposed to be real “rules”. I am sheltering in place, I made two masks for myself, and I take this pandemic very seriously.

[anothersteve]

Just to reassure anyone who needs reassuring, this was posted because I thought it was funny, not because I thought it was supposed to be real “rules”. I am sheltering in place, I made two masks for myself, and I take this pandemic very seriously.

Some people got it..........others...not so much
Steve

[Nucky]

Your list is the list of someone who wants to pretend that he doesn't understand the rules. Or someone who is sincerely SO ignorant that he actually doesn't understand the rules.

The rules are simple:

Accept that this IS a pandemic, it IS deadly, it IS contagious.
Accept that gloves and masks and social distancing CAN reduce your RISK of contracting it.
Accept that precautions are not 100% guaranteed to eliminate risk, but merely to reduce it.

The end.

The Forum is here for you to express your thoughts. You are doing a fine job with that no doubt.

However there was a Forum Rule that you will not find in writing but we decided collectively about 4 years ago to never use the words's THE END. Not in a Beautiful Retirement Community and Never During A Pandemic. :1rotfl::1rotfl::1rotfl:

The word Ignorant is so abrasive. Do you do realize you are typing these words to another member or our community. Stay safe & healthy! :ho:

This Thread is under the Heading JUST 4/FUN!

[stevemac]

This is great-brought a smile to my face!

[Uphillputt330]

Well said, I think?

[chipd331]

Your list is the list of someone who wants to pretend that he doesn't understand the rules. Or someone who is sincerely SO ignorant that he actually doesn't understand the rules.

The rules are simple:

Accept that this IS a pandemic, it IS deadly, it IS contagious.
Accept that gloves and masks and social distancing CAN reduce your RISK of contracting it.
Accept that precautions are not 100% guaranteed to eliminate risk, but merely to reduce it.

The end.

It's a JOKE!!! Humor, making light of something, get it?????????????????

[davem4616]

thanks to the OP there's absolutely no doubt in my mind now that this covid-19 has us all caught between a rock and a hard place

[WindyCityzen]

I know eight people who are sick and/or are hospitalized back home. My daughter is a nurse in a big city hospital and I’m very worried about her. So excuse me if I get really ****ed off when I read this selfish, stupid crap.

[Skunky1]

Save your daily sun newspaper in the event that you run out of toilet paper.

[soniak4@gmail.com]

OB Baby, you are spot on. Bjeamj, Sarcasm, at times is not funny or appreciated.

[photo1902]

OB Baby, you are spot on. Bjeamj, Sarcasm, at times is not funny or appreciated.

Your opinion, not mine. It’s a nice break from watching the doom and gloom news every day, with the scrolling stat bar constantly displayed on the bottom of the screen.

[anothersteve]

OB Baby, you are spot on. Bjeamj, Sarcasm, at times is not funny or appreciated.
V
V
V
V
V
by some

Like it was said, this is the "Just for Fun" section of the Forum.

Steve

[Bay Kid]

Sometimes the truth is very funny.

[dshoberg]

But what about golf? ⛳️🏌️😆

[paulajr]

Best....post....ever

[Croakn12]

Your list is the list of someone who wants to pretend that he doesn't understand the rules. Or someone who is sincerely SO ignorant that he actually doesn't understand the rules.

The rules are simple:

Accept that this IS a pandemic, it IS deadly, it IS contagious.
Accept that gloves and masks and social distancing CAN reduce your RISK of contracting it.
Accept that precautions are not 100% guaranteed to eliminate risk, but merely to reduce it.

The end.

Except, accept is not the proper word. Are you saying you accept what the op wrote or except they are wrong?

[Lindsyburnsy]

It would be great if we had 1 pandemic expert in this Administration, give 1 specific message on this virus snd post it on the CDC site, including stats on each state. The messaging has been as you write, all over the map and wishy washy. This is not how to handle a pandemic. We need testing everywhere so we know where this virus is.

[Leadbone1]

Exactly! Totally ridiculous isn’t it?

[stargirl]

Thanks for the recap of a month of television viewing, we could have all been binging Netflix instead!

[jswirs]

Your list is the list of someone who wants to pretend that he doesn't understand the rules. Or someone who is sincerely SO ignorant that he actually doesn't understand the rules.

The rules are simple:

Accept that this IS a pandemic, it IS deadly, it IS contagious.
Accept that gloves and masks and social distancing CAN reduce your RISK of contracting it.
Accept that precautions are not 100% guaranteed to eliminate risk, but merely to reduce it.



The end.

You may not be a victim of the pandemic, but you certainly are a victim of the "panic demic". I love it, "Laughter is the best medicine".

[Barefoot]

It's a JOKE! Humor, making light of something, get it?I found it funny, because it was a series of contradictions.
Bjeanj has said she is taking the pandemic very seriously, as we all should.
Please don't attack her - she just wanted to give us a laugh.

[kcrazorbackfan]

The OP has waaaaaaaaaay too much time on their hands.

He/she needs to get out the house, take a cart ride, walk the sidewalks aimlessly like many others are doing, etc., etc., etc.

[mary4471]

I always like reading your tag line about the restrauning order being just a piece of paper. Kind if like Lady Lake police, just people driving around enjoying the view!

[kendi]

Again....relax...take some deep breaths as long as you can, and take the OP's post tongue in cheek, try to laugh, or smile at least. It's not the end of the world.
Steve

And might I add you can’t control others anyway, only yourself. As we all know, laughter is great medicine

[Dennys37Packard]

Started my day off with a smile. Thanks.

[villageuser]

Love the original poster’s thread! That is hilarious! And, though I am taking this pandemic VERY SERIOUSLY, it really is like that. To add to all that he wrote:

- the virus is transmitted by droplets, and you are safe after 6’, except for when it is air particles. In which case, you may have to be at least 13’ feet away, if not more.

- the virus stays in plastic, cardboard, etc. between a few hours and 3 days. Unless, of course, it is in the cruise ships, it appears, where they found the virus still within the handrails 17 days later.

Clean your hands, clean your hands, clean your hands, except that - wait! The particles fall on the floor and get on the sole of your shoes. So, really, your shoes should be left outside unless you want to make sure you sterilize those too.

Make sure your counter tops, switches, door knobs, tables, etc. are all frequently cleaned and sanitized. Wait! Why are we doing this if we are sheltering in, nobody going out and nobody coming in? How is the virus getting into the house if it is only being transmitted from somebody else’s breath?

Soap and water works great. Sanitize with wipes if you can’t use soap and water. Though the sanitizing wipes are not recommended any more. They’re telling you use soap and water. Is that because the sanitizing wipes didn’t work, people were using it wrong, or they want the sanitizing wipes to be available for the essential people, and not so much for the people at home?

Really, if we can’t laugh about the craziness of all this, while trying to keep ourselves safe and sane.. . Well, I don’t know what else you can do.

[JoeinFL]

Just to reassure anyone who needs reassuring, this was posted because I thought it was funny, not because I thought it was supposed to be real “rules”. I am sheltering in place, I made two masks for myself, and I take this pandemic very seriously.

I believe most folks took your post the way it was intended. To give us a grin at a time when we don't have much to grin about.
Thanks!

[BlackhawksFan]

Every time I see the WHO trending I think either Pete Townshend or Roger Daltrey died.

[liz123]

I want to personally thank the writer for making me laugh and for helping me to understand so much more! I wondered why I felt so confused. Kind of like a relationship where you get mixed messages times ten, lol!~

[Robdianek]

“It ain't over 'til it's over."
Yogi B.

Well, that's it in a nutshell. You nailed it in a succinct, easy to understand novel. Thanks!

[TooColdNJ]

Your post was very tongue-in-cheek(y) pandastic!!! Thank you!

Kind of feel a little sorry for those who don’t appreciate a few sarcastically-funny words which, in some cases, do accurately reflect what is really happening and the differing beliefs, reactions, and behaviors amongst people. Some people have gone from disbelief (and/or lack of understanding ) to fear... back to confusion...then back to fear as a result of the initial lack of seriousness and constant flip-flopping of information that we received on a daily basis.

If we-the-people received more information in January (or whenever the still controversial beginning was), we might now be in a better place. If our leader (no matter who it would have been at a time like this) had taken charge of this as dynamically as he has with issues pertaining to our country’s economy, it just may have provided those rule-breakers and skeptics with more information and a better understanding of the (possible) severity of the situation.

A dynamic, well-respected and well-spoken leader, regardless of political affiliation, may have found a way to convey this in a manner that wasn’t *wishy-washy.” Maybe then those square-goers, crowd-makers, disbelievers, and rule-breakers would have taken this more seriously than they have. Would that have resulted in a panic, especially affecting the economic stability of our country? Maybe. Or it could have saved millions of lives by aggressively taking charge and at least being PREPARED for the worst.

Looking back, even live audiences stuffed into TV talk show locations were hearing comments about “this virus,” unknowingly contributing to its spread by just being there.

Early discussions about the possible severity of the situation and effect this could have on our people, our country, and globally, were hush-hushed. It didn’t end in a few weeks, go away with warmer temperatures, and/or provide the opportunity for families together in places of worship or our homes by Easter (BTW without even a mention of the word “Passover”). It wasn’t the flu. Wash your hands and keep them away from your face.

Disclosure: These comments reflect the opinion and feelings of the writer, not factually based on actual data, and can’t be debated. If you feel differently, state your OPINION intelligently without people bashing, please.

[Anne17]

Please, let your sense of humor take first place. I really don't think this was supposed to be a serious commentary - although there is much truth in it.

[jjcarter]

The truth would be the best, not what someone decides to print. Masks keep doctors and nurses alive so I guess the don't work, right!!

[Velvet]

There is a certain amount of truth in OP’s post, and it is quite understandable in the sense that this virus is a NOVEL virus. We are all guessing at how it behaves, those who have less risk from it, tend to underestimate it, those who are at more risk from it are either overestimating the virus’s impact or become martyrs.

We don’t know much about this virus. We are observing it carefully, studying it and making guesstimates on how it behaves. Many times we guess wrong, that is why the different advices. We are learning as we’re going.

[mwpoet]

So true. Or Don’t panic but stay vigilant! It there is nothing to fear but Everything!

[Dreah]

I don't find ridiculing this disease as funny. Drs have died. Nurses have died. Grocery store workers have died. Elderly in nursing homes have died and my friends Son, an R.N, just died, and his parents can't even give their only son a funeral.
Now ridicule that.

[theruizs]

Number 16 is soooo true!

[r67503]

Thank you. This is by far the most accurate information about Covid19, Chinese Flu, Kung Flu, Media Induced panic I have seen

[theruizs]

I don't find ridiculing this disease as funny. Drs have died. Nurses have died. Grocery store workers have died. Elderly in nursing homes have died and my friends Son, an R.N, just died, and his parents can't even give their only son a funeral.
Now ridicule that.

This is the “just for fun” forum. I don’t think anyone thinks any of what you have said is funny. This is a forum for people to blow off a little steam and frustration with humor.

[mkdavenportede@gmail.com]

It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. Aristotle

[Rodneysblue]

I never said most of the things I said.

[yankygrl]

What part of levity did you not get from original post? Yes this is bad but there are things you can and should do to stay safe, healthy and SANE

[Barefoot]

I never said most of the things I said.I think that's funny! :a040:

[Barefoot]

This is the “just for fun” forum.
This is a forum for people to blow off a little steam and frustration with humor.:agree:

[BS Beef]

83716
83717
I’d say both of these apply.

[robinrodriguez]

Love it! Absolutely accurate...maybe
Stay safe!

[SuzanneWight]

And we are confused why??? Lol. Great piece.

[Slapnut]

The media have blown this way out of proportion. So far it's been a a form of control over an enormous amount of people who have been frightened by the fake media

[aa1949a]

Your list is the list of someone who wants to pretend that he doesn't understand the rules. Or someone who is sincerely SO ignorant that he actually doesn't understand the rules.

The rules are simple:

Accept that this IS a pandemic, it IS deadly, it IS contagious.
Accept that gloves and masks and social distancing CAN reduce your RISK of contracting it.
Accept that precautions are not 100% guaranteed to eliminate risk, but merely to reduce it.

The end.
Now you make sense!!!!

[Fishers2tall]

:1rotfl::1rotfl::1rotfl::1rotfl::1rotfl::1rotfl:

[lynnschindel]

That gave me a good laugh! I agree, there's a lot of conflicting info out there, but most of us are trying to do the right thing and stay safe.

[eltingg]

This is loaded with mis-information.

[cegallup]

Your list is the list of someone who wants to pretend that he doesn't understand the rules. Or someone who is sincerely SO ignorant that he actually doesn't understand the rules.

The rules are simple:

Accept that this IS a pandemic, it IS deadly, it IS contagious.
Accept that gloves and masks and social distancing CAN reduce your RISK of contracting it.
Accept that precautions are not 100% guaranteed to eliminate risk, but merely to reduce it.

The end.
And you can save 10,000 + lives a year if we lower the Speed Limit to 25 MPH ! Would you favor that too ?

[Trophy25]

Are you okay? Anyone in their right mind understands that this is a very well written satire for fun. Lighten up or the stress not CV will kill you. Virtually everything mentioned was reported by the media at one time or another. Hell one day the CDC said not to wear a mask and the next they said you need to wear one. Go figure. The so called experts are never wrong. They're kind of like the economists.

[Velvet]

Ouch, economist disagree on the assumptions they make to come up with different results. The medical people, on the other hand, were facing something unknown.