HomoSexual Males in The Villages??

[Salvador]

Hello.

Got a bit of a question.

How are homosexual couples received in The Villages?? Would people resent living next to one??? Would it catch a lot of attention?? You know....stares and ogles and whispers....would the good old fashioned folks not want to shake hands :confused:

To give you some background, my partner, a physician and golf nut, is reaching retirement age and we would like to relocate to Florida from the mid-west. However, after visiting the gay retirement havens of Ft. Lauderdale/South Beach/Miami Beach a couple times, we decided the culture there wasn't for us (very youth centric and superficial among other things).

We are discrete and conduct our lives conservatively (not Tuba players, so to speak) and don't necessarily seek out diversity--

--but would living in the Villages be pushing the envelope too far???

Any thoughts on how the straights (or breeders :jester:) here feel about the issue??

PS.......be as honest or cruel as you want to be, because I would like to gauge the true sentiment of the community.

[batman911]

Salvador,

I am still in TV wannabe category, but from my visits to TV, I suspect it is much the same as any average city of the same size. I would doubt, given the average age of residents, that anyone would openly object. I would hope that most of our generation has out grown that type of behavior. I also believe that the lack of responses to your question shows that most do not want to be labeled suspect. I would not object to anyone living in TV as long as they follow the community rules and treat their neighbors with respect.

And no....I'm not.... in case anyone is wondering.

[BobKat1]

A good way to answer your questions would be to do a Lifestyle Preview visit or rent a home. You would get first hand experience. My guess/hope is that it wouldn't be a big deal to most.

[villager99]

the villages rainbow club web site should help answer your questions


http://rainbowfamilyvillagesfl.com/site/

[bestmickey]

Not yet a resident, hope to be in 2013. I am a single heterosexual female, just to give you a point of reference. I would love to have a gay couple as my neighbor! I think a gay couple (male or female) will be more welcoming of a single female than a heterosexual couple will be.

I should probably also point out that I've had lots of exposure to gay men and am probably more accepting than most. In "the day" (beginning in the early 70's), I began going to gay (mostly men) bars a few nights a week, where I would dance the night away. Some of my best friends were gay.
Hope we end up neighbors!

[pooh]

Personally, I wouldn't have any problem with you and your partner living in The Villages or next door to me, Salvador.

Bob suggested a lifestyle preview, I think that's a great idea. You and your partner have to determine for yourselves if you even like the community and the area. There's so much to like, really, and there is such a diverse group of people, about 80,000, living here.

[OpusX1]

We have good friends that live in Calumet and their neighbors are gay. Nice guys. They are invited to all the neighborhood activities and such. As long as you are nice guys I don't think you will have any problems. The operative phrase being nice guys, nice people. We really are very tolerant. The only people I stay away from are grouches, and mean people.

[graciegirl]

You sound like such a nice guy, Salvador. I welcome you and hope you find this lovely place to be just what you are looking for.

I agree that you should come here for a lifestyle visit, so that you can see for yourself.

Hope you love it here.

[redwitch]

I'm sure it is an issue to some that reside in TV, but not to most. I have a variety of friends/acquaintances. Some gay, some lesbian, a couple in their 30s, several in their 80s. The ones that have the hardest time adjusting and being accepted are those in their 30s. The rest seem to have no problems finding their niches.

As was suggested, take the lifestyles preview or rent a home for a month. You'll be able to judge for yourself. Hopefully, you'll feel as welcome here as I believe you will.

[Russ_Boston]

Ditto what Gracie said:)

[barb1191]

Me too, Russ...ditto. Gracie put it nicely; right on target, and I feel there is no class distinction nor any racial tensions here in Paradise. Good advice to "try it; you'll like it." The place sells itself as you will see.

barb

[l2ridehd]

Come on down. You can be my neighbor anytime. I would think most of the people in TV would be past those arcane ideas. At least a higher % then most places.

[doubleujay1]

I would have no problem with you guys living in my neighborhood. Live and let live. I love golf too and would welcome your partner in my group. Good Luck! A lot of conservatives live here but you will find that out soon enough. If you haven't visited here, you are in for a treat. Great place. Just moved in on Monday.

[Salvador]

Wow.

Thanks for all the great responses, and for Villager99 for providing the web-site.

I really didn't know what to expect. I don't usually make such an issue out of sexual orientation, but I did kinda want to get a sense of what it might be like in such a tight knit community, and this forum was a way to to it anonymously.

And I suppose a visit is in order. Need to start making plans.

Will keep you posted. :mademyday:

[missypie]

Hello.

Got a bit of a question.

How are homosexual couples received in The Villages?? Would people resent living next to one??? Would it catch a lot of attention?? You know....stares and ogles and whispers....would the good old fashioned folks not want to shake hands :confused:

To give you some background, my partner, a physician and golf nut, is reaching retirement age and we would like to relocate to Florida from the mid-west. However, after visiting the gay retirement havens of Ft. Lauderdale/South Beach/Miami Beach a couple times, we decided the culture there wasn't for us (very youth centric and superficial among other things).

We are discrete and conduct our lives conservatively (not Tuba players, so to speak) and don't necessarily seek out diversity--

--but would living in the Villages be pushing the envelope too far???

Any thoughts on how the straights (or breeders :jester:) here feel about the issue??

PS.......be as honest or cruel as you want to be, because I would like to gauge the true sentiment of the community.

How is anyone received at the Villages? Are you friendly? A good neighbor? Keep your lawn lookiing good? Who is anyone to judge anyone? Have a visit and see if the Lifestyle works for YOU!

[Lou Card]

My recommendation would be to keep a low profile until you find your niche and way around this Paradise. If you can blend into the conservative fabric of The Villages, it is a wonderful place to live. We have traveled the world and this is the right place for us. Like anywhere, it would not be helpful to bring up your political or religious beliefs. Stay clear of major issue like pro-life/choice or Stem cell research or any left wing/right wing sensitive issues. The Villages is no different than any other place when it comes to folks acting out when addressing their personal opinions with passion. I am a Conservative Democrat (the minority here) and love this place. If I were gay, or if I fit into any less mainstream category or group, I would not hesitate to live in The Villages. I personally have voiced my opinion about several sensitive issues and have been beat verbally for it; however, I very much love this place and the people in it. I have been challenged for my beliefs, but have not received any threats. We have 80 plus thousand retired folks here with too much time on their hands. So, in a nut shell, you will love it here just as we do.

[Taltarzac]

This seems to relate to what the people in the neighborhood you would move to are like. Some of the neighborhoods seem to be very friendly while others migh not be so. This applies to straights, gays, lesbians, or whatever.

Evidence of this is that there have been various tales of both very good neighbors as well as bad neighbors here on TOTV.

To counter this, you may have to do some shopping around to see what the neighborhoods are actually like.

It seems issues about noise, pets, and politics or religion cause a lot more friction though than being straight or gay.

[grayesun]

Yes, you & your partner would likely be openly welcomed in any of the neighborhoods, not sure why an earlier poster implied there might be some villages not as accepting of you as others.
Our sexual preferences are a private/personal part of our lives and should be practiced (I know I need lots of practice) DISCRETELY with the partner/partners we choose. This is generally the behavioral norm anyplace I've ever lived, including now in TV; would be shocked (and flabbergasted :1rotfl:) at open displays of sexuality (straight or gay) from my neighbors.
So...:welcome:

PS. Not sure dropping the term "breeder" is a great way to make new friends; sounds like we're the creepy aliens in a Sci-fi movie.

[Taltarzac]

Yes, you & your partner would likely be openly welcomed in any of the neighborhoods, not sure why an earlier poster implied there might be some villages not as accepting of you as others.
Our sexual preferences are a private/personal part of our lives and should be practiced (I know I need lots of practice) DISCRETELY with the partner/partners we choose. This is generally the behavioral norm anyplace I've ever lived, including now in TV; would be shocked (and flabbergasted :1rotfl:) at open displays of sexuality (straight or gay) from my neighbors.
So...:welcome:

PS. Not sure dropping the term "breeder" is a great way to make new friends; sounds like we're the creepy aliens in a Sci-fi movie.

My point was that personalities of neighbors can play a big part in certain locales. There have been a lot of stories on TOTV about neighbors getting in beefs over pets leaving marks on lawns, noise from parties, and the like. Sexual orientation could be a problem with some neighborhood bully; though it might just be an excuse.

I would not think being gay or straight would be any kind of problem with most neighborhoods in the Villages.

It just depends on how the neighbors get along with one another or don't.

I had one acquaintance who felt he had to move out of the Villages because one of his neighbors had a lot of problems with how long he kept his Christmas lights on as well as how many they had around the outside of their house. Believe his various garden gnomes also kind of ****ed off some of his neighbors. He also danced to the beat of his own drum which can be problem in some neighborhoods where conformity can be an issue.

[grayesun]

My point was that personalities of neighbors can play a big part in certain locales. There have been a lot of stories on TOTV about neighbors getting in beefs over pets leaving marks on lawns, noise from parties, and the like. Sexual orientation could be a problem with some neighborhood bully; it might just be an excuse.

I would not think being gay or straight would be any kind of problem with most neighborhoods in the Villages.

It just depends on how the neighbors get along with one another or don't.

I had one acquaintance who felt he had to move out of the Villages because one of his neighbors had a lot of problems with how long he kept his Christmas lights on as well as how many they had around the outside of their house. Believe his various knomes also kind of ****ed off some of his neighbors.

Got you, good points...guess we all takes our chances when we move to a new & quite "foreign" locale...hoping our lifestyles & foibles won't offend our good neighbors or the few knuckleheads out there.

[graciegirl]

Ah yes gnomes. I know a couple who moved into their new home a couple of years ago and were disappointed to see that their next door neighbors had a LOT of garden ornaments....(upwards of 30) But the unseen powers that be caused them (the gnomes and duckies and such) to go away.

That is so different than a persons personal life and choices in the partner department. Some of my friends in TV have been married many times and some are not married couples and some like us G's were fortunate to find the right one the first time. I agree with the poster that said if you keep your property nice and can cobble together a decent potato salad for the block party, there is no reason that you won't love it here and everyone will love you!!

Happiness is contagious here.

[redwitch]

Are there bigots here? Of course there are! It's too large of a community for them to be left out. Most, however, have the sense to keep their views to themselves. Those that don't are quickly ostercized by neighbors and the community.

While many of the truly elderly (late 80s/90s) were raised to believe that being gay was a mortal sin, many have learned that those "gay folks" are wonderful people. We can thank their grandchildren and great-grandchildren for that. It's pretty hard to actively dislike and be afraid of your kids, grandkids and great-grands or their friends, all of whom have come to visit you and were openly gay. And if not your relatives, your best friend's or your favorite neighbor's. Today's openness has made it much easier to be accepting of gays, people of different color, divorcees, inter-racial marriages and many things considered taboo in the past.

As has been said, it is more important to be a good neighbor than to be straight, married and conservative. Heck, even this liberal, divorced old broad with a relatively big mouth is accepted and even loved. Have no fear, barring a very few, your sexual orientation will not be an issue. Your lawn maintenance, noisy dog, proclivity to play rock music or even opera at 2:00 am with the bass booming will be. And if you can't cook, learn. Be able to make one good potluck dish and you'll be adored.

[walkr]

Salvador,

My husband and I would welcome you as neighbors.

We are more liberal than many in TV, and we have a lesbian daughter, so we are probably more accepting than some.

Last summer, my daughter (age 22) and her partner came down to visit us in TV. They were walking hand in hand in Lake Sumter Landing one evening after 9 PM, when a man in a golf cart drove by them, then turned around and drove by again, stared, and then drove on. They were startled by this because they live in a very liberal community. I talked to a TV resident who is lesbian, and she said she would never hold hands with her partner in TV. I find that sad, because I like to hold hands with my husband when we are walking. Change comes slowly. Maybe some day...

I don't get into discussions of my political views here in the Midwest with people who are more conservative, and I don't plan to in TV either. I have friends and family at both ends of the political spectrum.

Once we get to TV permanently, my feeling is, if someone doesn't like what our family looks like (and they make it known), then we can still be cordial neighbors but they probably just won't be close friends.

I agree with what some others have said above. It seems like most people are just looking for neighbors who keep their house and yard up, keep their pets under control, and don't have excessive noise.

We will be retiring and moving down permanently at the end of this year. There are many wonderful people in TV. We are counting the minutes!

walkr

[Taltarzac]

Ah yes gnomes. I know a couple who moved into their new home a couple of years ago and were disappointed to see that their next door neighbors had a LOT of garden ornaments....(upwards of 30) But the unseen powers that be caused them (the gnomes and duckies and such) to go away.

That is so different than a persons personal life and choices in the partner department. Some of my friends in TV have been married many times and some are not married couples and some like us G's were fortunate to find the right one the first time. I agree with the poster that said if you keep your property nice and can cobble together a decent potato salad for the block party, there is no reason that you won't love it here and everyone will love you!!

Happiness is contagious here.

If this was in Polo Ridge, we may be thinking of the same couple with the many garden gnomes.

But some people kind of get upset with people who have different tastes, politics, or something other than they do.

My brother is married to a rather dark skinned Jamaican lady who also sometimes speaks with a strong accent. He is white.
They have received a lot of stares and/or other kinds of bad behavior from people of both races. It did happen in the Villages too but not as much as some of the other places they have been.

[scrapple]

I am really glad to stumble on to this thread. My husband and I are moving down 10/1. We did a lifestyle preview. Our confusion comes into which village hosts which type of personality. We really want to live close to Salvador! Or at least in a fun, accepting neighborhood that does allow for political discussions and doesn't foster a "don't ask, don't tell" philosophy. We'll be renting for a few months until we find a place we want to settle down into. But how do we find that place? We're coming with our dog, would like a village that enjoys dog parties. We like neighbors that feel they can stop by to say hi without calling 1st. We like impromptu happy hours. We like music. We also recognize that strong fences make strong friendships and so are looking for a CYV. Any thoughts on how we find the right village for us? See you all soon! Carol and Dan.

[graciegirl]

Carol and Dan.

The warm and loving village that is accepting and fun is my village.

Taltarzac lives in the same kind of village.

Redwitch does.

PTurner does.

Donna does.

Kathie does.

Melz does.

Coconuts does.

Caroline does.

UUJudy does.

BogieShooter does.

Golfnut does.

and on and on and on.

Everyone does.

When you come here you will see.

If you move here you will see.

There is a little bit of bad in the best of us and a little bit of good in the worst of us.

but this place is as close to perfect as it comes.

[cashman]

I would have no problem with you guys living in my neighborhood. Live and let live. I love golf too and would welcome your partner in my group. Good Luck! A lot of conservatives live here but you will find that out soon enough. If you haven't visited here, you are in for a treat. Great place. Just moved in on Monday.

I am not sure why you mention that a lot of conservatives live in TV.

Conservatives have no problems with Gays. WE feel what they do is their business. I am a heterosexual and keep my sex life private between my wife and myself. I think most people feel that way; including Gays.

[Yoda]

OMG, we are so old that we take everything very serious. I assure you that if you don't suck face in the "town square" nobody will notice you. If they do notice you, they will forget you the first 6 or 7 times.

If you are your sexual orientation, that may disturb some. Just like if you were a hetero and behaved like a slut in public.

I think that I can speak for many of the "Conservative villains." We really don't care. We kind of like the old "Don't ask, don't tell" rule and I see no reason why you would want to tell me. Unless of course you were to hit on me. TV is not a gay community so behave as you would in any non-gay community. Nothing new here. Many people here feel very fortunate to have any sexual orientation at all.

So, if you like the place, it may like you. Don't wear a dress with a beard and you will not be noticed.

I am going to be in the poops for this one............I can tell. :read:

Yoda

[Russ_Boston]

Many people here feel very fortunate to have any sexual orientation at all

:a20:

[scrapple]

Carol and Dan.

The warm and loving village that is accepting and fun is my village.

Taltarzac lives in the same kind of village.

Redwitch does.

PTurner does.

Donna does.

Kathie does.

Melz does.

Coconuts does.

Caroline does.

UUJudy does.

BogieShooter does.

Golfnut does.

and on and on and on.

Everyone does.

When you come here you will see.

If you move here you will see.

There is a little bit of bad in the best of us and a little bit of good in the worst of us.

but this place is as close to perfect as it comes.

Can't wait to meet everyone in person! Gracie, will you take us on a tour if you have some time? I'll provide lunch! Carol and Dan

[Russ_Boston]

If you're buying lunch, we ALL want in!

[grayesun]

I am not sure why you mention that a lot of conservatives live in TV.

Conservatives have no problems with Gays. WE feel what they do is their business. I am a heterosexual and keep my sex life private between my wife and myself. I think most people feel that way; including Gays.

I too am befuddled and confounded how the politics of conservatism found it's way into this thread...yikes...I know I'm teetering on the edge of politics here, but hoping to not cross the foul line and just curiously trying understand if some folks think there is a corrolation between being a conservative person (non-flamboyant, neutral, beige-loving, cautious saver & spender, old fashioned values etc.) and having a conservative political philosophy. Now, I'm certain neither of those conservative types discussed in this thread are being generalized as intolerant of gays. Geesh this stuff makes my brain hurt.

[rjm1cc]

Not a TV'er, but if I moved in next to you it would not bother me. Probably would not even know unless you told me.

[Pats2010]

I too am befuddled and confounded how the politics of conservatism found it's way into this thread...yikes...I know I'm teetering on the edge of politics here, but hoping to not cross the foul line and just curiously trying understand if some folks think there is a corrolation between being a conservative person (non-flamboyant, neutral, beige-loving, cautious saver & spender, old fashioned values etc.) and having a conservative political philosophy. Now, I'm certain neither of those conservative types discussed in this thread are being generalized as intolerant of gays. Geesh this stuff makes my brain hurt.

I guess living in the bubble does not make one immune from stereotyping.

[scrapple]

If you're buying lunch, we ALL want in!

I said I'd provide lunch, which might be scrapple (see other posts), and I'd welcome an outing with you as well! How do we go about this?
Carol

[Pturner]

:wave: Salvador,

Welcome to TOTV.

Put me in the agree with Gracie column. I think the vast majority of people in TV would welcome you!

I think when you do your lifestyle tour, you will fall in love with the place! Depending on the time of year you visit, your lifestyle tour could include two rounds of free golf at championship courses of your choice and free meals at a number of good restaurants in TV. You also get a golf cart, two bicycles and will stay in a very nice villa. It is a great way to to visit for the first time.

BTW, if you are not a golfer, there are a zillion other things do do here.

Come on down! Keep us posted about your stay. And if you have any more questions about TV, just ask us here on TOTV.

[Russ_Boston]

I said I'd provide lunch, which might be scrapple (see other posts), and I'd welcome an outing with you as well! How do we go about this?
Carol

Scrapple? I'm there!

Unfortunately I won't be there full-time for another year or so. But from what I know about scrapple, it will hold.

Salvatore - You notice how we veer off topic a lot?:)

[kentucky blue]

I guess living in the bubble does not make one immune from stereotyping.

Talk about stereotyping, i live in a southern city that has an annual gay pride parade and an entire weekend devoted to gay pride and rights.The incumbent mayor is in a tough fight for re-election against an openly gay opponent. When you think of Kentucky, supporting gays and their rights is not the first thing outsiders think about. So visit TV's with no preconceived opinions , and i would bet, you and your partner will have a very enjoyable time.

[CSilvestrucci]

I agree with Gracie. You would be welcome in any village.:welcome: Come on down.

[thistrucksforyou]

Let me be the first here to be honest with you....Being gay isn't the issue ,it's will people in TV play with me, golf, cards, pickle ball, whatever....

I have visited TV twice a year for 4 years now and I have yet had one person ask me to play golf or go out to dinner...All people there is willing to give you is alot of lip service on how great it is there and how much there is to do, well unless you are in the click you are just another shopper ....The tour is a set up from the property owner...Special cards that are color coded so the buisness owners will know who you are...All the buisness people are prompted to wave at you as you ride by in the bus...Don't get me wrong, it is a great place to live with some good and bad people there...It will be the same there as anywhere else you may go....After saying that let ME BE THE FIRST to have you and your partner be my guest on the golf coarse or have dinner there, and I can show you around....At least I made the offer !

Just my thoughts

[Mallory]

I think the best place to go for information on this subject is www.rainbowfamilyvillagesfl.com. Information is available about contacts, social events, and frequently asked questions, etc.

And, as is fitting in The Villages, members can get discounts from other members who provide services.

[Russ_Boston]

Let me be the first here to be honest with you....Being gay isn't the issue ,it's will people in TV play with me, golf, cards, pickle ball, whatever....

I have visited TV twice a year for 4 years now and I have yet had one person ask me to play golf or go out to dinner...All people there is willing to give you is alot of lip service on how great it is there and how much there is to do, well unless you are in the click you are just another shopper ....The tour is a set up from the property owner...Special cards that are color coded so the buisness owners will know who you are...All the buisness people are prompted to wave at you as you ride by in the bus...Don't get me wrong, it is a great place to live with some good and bad people there...It will be the same there as anywhere else you may go....After saying that let ME BE THE FIRST to have you and your partner be my guest on the golf coarse or have dinner there, and I can show you around....At least I made the offer !

Just my thoughts

What? Hogwash!

Granted you may not have been asked to dinner etc. but perhaps that is your fault? Do you expect people to just stop you and say "Hey dude, how about joining our foursome tomorrow".? Go join a group as a single golfer. Do that day after day and I guarantee you that you'll make some new golfing friends. Go join in on any group (pickleball lessons, lap swimmers, card games, etc.) and talk with people - you'll make friends. Yes you have to put yourself out there but that is no different than any place.

I don't often get angry on this forum but for Salvatore's benefit please understand that this is an open forum and people can say anything they'd like to. Salvatore has taken the first step by posting on this board. I've made dozens of real friends over the past 3 years through TOTV. I meet with these friends for golf, bocce, shuffleboard, dinners, home parties, pickleball... every time I visit.

And I'll be there next week to pick out my home and interior choices, so let the fun begin.

[redwitch]

The reality is that "locals" will be friendly to visitors, but few will go out of their way to invite you into their way of life. That takes time and a lifestyle visit won't do it. If you go to the pools or play golf with an attitude (and it sounds like thistruck has a HUGE attitude), you'll be ignored as much as possible. If you smile, talk, be helpful, you'll be welcomed. Will you be invited to join in games or dinner? As a short-term renter, probably not -- invite someone to your home or to join you for dinner, it will usually be reciprocated. At the same time, you'll be welcomed at the various clubs and as a single on the golf courses.

You will be treated as a welcome visitor wherever you go -- not just by tradespeople and TV staff but by residents as well. If you complain about TV, you'll quickly and happily be ostracized. If you go with a smile on your face, a willingness to accept people as they are, a hopeful attitude that TV is the place for you (or at least come to have fun), you'll be accepted. If you want the extras such as dinner at someone's home, you have to go the extra mile and offer first. As to joining in games (whether golf, cards or pickleball), that's a little more difficult -- most groups are set to play on a set schedule and there is usually a sub or two or three waiting to be invited. So, an extra player is frequently a problem -- there just ain't a space for 'em.

And, thistruck, if you find TV so unfriendly, unclean and unlawful, why do you keep coming back?

[philnpat]

The reality is that "locals" will be friendly to visitors, but few will go out of their way to invite you into their way of life. That takes time and a lifestyle visit won't do it. If you go to the pools or play golf with an attitude (and it sounds like thistruck has a HUGE attitude), you'll be ignored as much as possible. If you smile, talk, be helpful, you'll be welcomed. Will you be invited to join in games or dinner? As a short-term renter, probably not -- invite someone to your home or to join you for dinner, it will usually be reciprocated. At the same time, you'll be welcomed at the various clubs and as a single on the golf courses.

You will be treated as a welcome visitor wherever you go -- not just by tradespeople and TV staff but by residents as well. If you complain about TV, you'll quickly and happily be ostracized. If you go with a smile on your face, a willingness to accept people as they are, a hopeful attitude that TV is the place for you (or at least come to have fun), you'll be accepted. If you want the extras such as dinner at someone's home, you have to go the extra mile and offer first. As to joining in games (whether golf, cards or pickleball), that's a little more difficult -- most groups are set to play on a set schedule and there is usually a sub or two or three waiting to be invited. So, an extra player is frequently a problem -- there just ain't a space for 'em.

And, thistruck, if you find TV so unfriendly, unclean and unlawful, why do you keep coming back?

Excellent point, Redwitch!...if I felt this way about TV I'd avoid it like the plague.

[Pats2010]

You usually get what you put into it. Nothing ventured- nothing gained.

[Shirleevee]

Hello.

Got a bit of a question.

How are homosexual couples received in The Villages?? Would people resent living next to one??? Would it catch a lot of attention?? You know....stares and ogles and whispers....would the good old fashioned folks not want to shake hands :confused:

To give you some background, my partner, a physician and golf nut, is reaching retirement age and we would like to relocate to Florida from the mid-west. However, after visiting the gay retirement havens of Ft. Lauderdale/South Beach/Miami Beach a couple times, we decided the culture there wasn't for us (very youth centric and superficial among other things).

We are discrete and conduct our lives conservatively (not Tuba players, so to speak) and don't necessarily seek out diversity--

--but would living in the Villages be pushing the envelope too far???

Any thoughts on how the straights (or breeders :jester:) here feel about the issue??

PS.......be as honest or cruel as you want to be, because I would like to gauge the true sentiment of the community.

We have 'many' gay friends here. Their lifestyles are a non issue. You will be welcomed here by most. Even though you jest, I found the "breeders" remark offensive.

[Pats2010]

We have 'many' gay friends here. Their lifestyles are a non issue. You will be welcomed here by most. Even though you jest, I found the "breeders" remark offensive.

Yes, the "breeders" remark was originally intended as a derogatory word against hetro's. Don't know if it still has same meaning, though.

[grayesun]

Let me be the first here to be honest with you....Being gay isn't the issue ,it's will people in TV play with me, golf, cards, pickle ball, whatever....

I have visited TV twice a year for 4 years now and I have yet had one person ask me to play golf or go out to dinner...All people there is willing to give you is alot of lip service on how great it is there and how much there is to do, well unless you are in the click you are just another shopper ....The tour is a set up from the property owner...Special cards that are color coded so the buisness owners will know who you are...All the buisness people are prompted to wave at you as you ride by in the bus...Don't get me wrong, it is a great place to live with some good and bad people there...It will be the same there as anywhere else you may go....After saying that let ME BE THE FIRST to have you and your partner be my guest on the golf coarse or have dinner there, and I can show you around....At least I made the offer !

Just my thoughts

Sorry thistruck, but we've been living in TV for 8 months now and couldn't disagree more...we've been openly welcomed by all we've encountered, whether around the neighborhood, in town squares, at recreation facilities, on the golf courses and everywhere else. We're younger than most of the typical residents and thought we might not be readily accepted or feel awkward joining their group activities...we were so wrong. We play golf in a neighborhood scramble every Sunday afternoon, it's really a great time...playing 9 with a new couple each week then going in the clubhouse for dinner & socializing...doesn't get any better!
We also discovered that a fine way to meet new people to play golf with is to keep personal business sized info cards in your golf bag to hand out during a round to folks you're compatible with in golf skills or other interests; we've handed out a bunch, leading to many rounds with new friends at TV.
In summary - one should weigh thistrucks opinion of TV as a 2 week visitor against those of the full time residents and decide for yourself.
So thistruck, next time you're visiting TV let's play golf; let me be the 1st to invite you to play a round of golf. Please reply and we'll make the plans.

[grayesun]

What? Hogwash!

Granted you may not have been asked to dinner etc. but perhaps that is your fault? Do you expect people to just stop you and say "Hey dude, how about joining our foursome tomorrow".? Go join a group as a single golfer. Do that day after day and I guarantee you that you'll make some new golfing friends. Go join in on any group (pickleball lessons, lap swimmers, card games, etc.) and talk with people - you'll make friends. Yes you have to put yourself out there but that is no different than any place.

I don't often get angry on this forum but for Salvatore's benefit please understand that this is an open forum and people can say anything they'd like to. Salvatore has taken the first step by posting on this board. I've made dozens of real friends over the past 3 years through TOTV. I meet with these friends for golf, bocce, shuffleboard, dinners, home parties, pickleball... every time I visit.

And I'll be there next week to pick out my home and interior choices, so let the fun begin.

Good luck with your new place in Buttonwood; you'll be a fine addition to the neighborhood.

[Shirleevee]

Here is a note from one of my gay friends:

Tell him that many of your gay friends have had children of their own, whether it be from a former relationship or adoption or any other number of ways and the “breeder” remark is just as offensive to us. If he wants to fit in anywhere in this country, he just needs to be himself. He is not going to have a sign put on his home with a big rainbow on it, saying GAY household, unless of course he puts it there himself.


People in the villages for the most part are kind, considerate and could careless whether someone is gay or not. There is a huge (over 1000 members) gay community here and they are welcoming to all! There are several churches in the community that are open to gay people as well. People are people, that is the bottom line.

[wilsonem]

I could care less what my neighbors do in the privacy of thier bedrooms.

[doubleujay1]

I did not mean to generalize conservatives. I know that not all conservatives are anti-gay . But saying that I do believe that conservatives in general are more apt to be religious and therefore believe that homosexuality is wrong. I apologize for generalizing because I don't like to do that and I didn't want it to be taken that way.

[grayesun]

Here is a note from one of my gay friends:

Tell him that many of your gay friends have had children of their own, whether it be from a former relationship or adoption or any other number of ways and the “breeder” remark is just as offensive to us. If he wants to fit in anywhere in this country, he just needs to be himself. He is not going to have a sign put on his home with a big rainbow on it, saying GAY household, unless of course he puts it there himself.


People in the villages for the most part are kind, considerate and could careless whether someone is gay or not. There is a huge (over 1000 members) gay community here and they are welcoming to all! There are several churches in the community that are open to gay people as well. People are people, that is the bottom line.

The use of the term breeder in this context got stuck in my craw as well; I found it offensive, heterophobic, condascending and inappropriate - so I spat it into the bathroom vessel, flushed and am now done with it. We're all humanity...a race of breeders; us, our parents and our children...and you too Salvador.

[Irish Rover]

Why not go to South Beach or Key West where you know you will be accepted. You are getting all the politically correct responses on this site for obvious reasons. You wouldn't be asking this question if you weren't a bit worried. The Villages is a very conservative area, and if you read these posts regularly you'll find all is rosey until someone is actually confronted with a problem.
Think about it.

[redwitch]

Why not go to South Beach or Key West where you know you will be accepted. You are getting all the politically correct responses on this site for obvious reasons. You wouldn't be asking this question if you weren't a bit worried. The Villages is a very conservative area, and if you read these posts regularly you'll find all is rosey until someone is actually confronted with a problem.
Think about it.

Sal already stated why he wasn't interested in Key West, South Beach or the myriad other gay communities. The reality is that the majority of TVers would accept Sal and his partner. There are some who won't. There are some who will give lip service to being accepting and then do their best to undermine those not "acceptable."

I do believe the majority of TOTVers will accept a gay couple -- as a group, they're younger than the majority presently residing in TV. However, as I stated previously, older members of TV have come to accept gays and other peoples they once felt were unacceptable -- mainly because of their grandchildren and great-grandchildren.

I did find Sal's use of "breeder" somewhst offensive but I've heard it enough from gay friends to leave it for a private conversation. But I truly resent Rover's comments that Sal and his partner would not be accepted because they are gay. I love Gracie but I don't wear her rose-colored glasses. I see the good and bad of TV. Non-acceptance of someone because of sexual orientation is not one of TV's foibles.

[Pats2010]

Sal already stated why he wasn't interested in Key West, South Beach or the myriad other gay communities. The reality is that the majority of TVers would accept Sal and his partner. There are some who won't. There are some who will give lip service to being accepting and then do their best to undermine those not "acceptable."

I do believe the majority of TOTVers will accept a gay couple -- as a group, they're younger than the majority presently residing in TV. However, as I stated previously, older members of TV have come to accept gays and other peoples they once felt were unacceptable -- mainly because of their grandchildren and great-grandchildren.

I did find Sal's use of "breeder" somewhst offensive but I've heard it enough from gay friends to leave it for a private conversation. But I truly resent Rover's comments that Sal and his partner would not be accepted because they are gay. I love Gracie but I don't wear her rose-colored glasses. I see the good and bad of TV. Non-acceptance of someone because of sexual orientation is not one of TV's foibles.

Sal did not say that. Please read him again. I think he was just trying to give this thread a little leverage as it seems that everybody is trying to out-liberal each other.
That being said, I would have no problem with it as I have a gay nephew who is accepted be everybody in our family.

[redwitch]

Um, I didn't say Sal said it. I said IRISH ROVER said it (or at least implied it).

[Russ_Boston]

You are getting all the politically correct responses on this site for obvious reasons.

Don't you dare tell me that my response was for some PC reason, my answer is genuine. I have friends both here in Mass and down in TV who are gay, straight, black, white, conservative, liberal and every tone in between.

Sal asked for your opinion and you gave it and I'll respect that. But don't ever tell someone else why you think I answered a question.

[Zoomie1955]

I am really glad to stumble on to this thread. My husband and I are moving down 10/1. We did a lifestyle preview. Our confusion comes into which village hosts which type of personality. We really want to live close to Salvador! Or at least in a fun, accepting neighborhood that does allow for political discussions and doesn't foster a "don't ask, don't tell" philosophy. We'll be renting for a few months until we find a place we want to settle down into. But how do we find that place? We're coming with our dog, would like a village that enjoys dog parties. We like neighbors that feel they can stop by to say hi without calling 1st. We like impromptu happy hours. We like music. We also recognize that strong fences make strong friendships and so are looking for a CYV. Any thoughts on how we find the right village for us? See you all soon! Carol and Dan.


Come live in my neighborhood!!!(Buttonwood in 2011.) You guys (that's my Pennsylvanian coming out)sound like you would be great neighbors!!!! Also, you too Salvator!!!

[Chi-Town]

I am not sure why you mention that a lot of conservatives live in TV.

Conservatives have no problems with Gays. WE feel what they do is their business. I am a heterosexual and keep my sex life private between my wife and myself. I think most people feel that way; including Gays.
I agree that you cannot suggest that conservatives are anti-gay. Some of the staunchest conservatives such as Mark Foley, Ted Haggard, Larry Craig, Bob Allen, and Roy Ashburn are gay.

[kentucky blue]

Hello.



--but would living in the Villages be pushing the envelope too far???

Any thoughts on how the straights (or breeders :jester:) here feel about the issue??

PS.......be as honest or cruel as you want to be, because I would like to gauge the true sentiment of the community.

Yes, the jester is a sign of levity and that's how the "breeder" comment should have been taken. The longer this thread goes on, Salvador will see the true colors of TV, and they are not the colors of the rainbow.

[MelZ]

Hello.

Got a bit of a question.

How are homosexual couples received in The Villages?? Would people resent living next to one??? Would it catch a lot of attention?? You know....stares and ogles and whispers....would the good old fashioned folks not want to shake hands :confused:

To give you some background, my partner, a physician and golf nut, is reaching retirement age and we would like to relocate to Florida from the mid-west. However, after visiting the gay retirement havens of Ft. Lauderdale/South Beach/Miami Beach a couple times, we decided the culture there wasn't for us (very youth centric and superficial among other things).

We are discrete and conduct our lives conservatively (not Tuba players, so to speak) and don't necessarily seek out diversity--

--but would living in the Villages be pushing the envelope too far???

Any thoughts on how the straights (or breeders :jester:) here feel about the issue??

PS.......be as honest or cruel as you want to be, because I would like to gauge the true sentiment of the community.

I could care less about your orientation but I find the term "breeder" highly offensive, that comment makes me question your intent and tolerance (adding the jester doesn't make the term less derisive). Please do not bring your prejudice with your golf clubs.

[RichieLion]

I think the bottom line is that The Villages is no different from anywhere else, and in fact based on my one year of living here, is friendlier than most.

My brother-in-law and his significant other joined my wife and I when we looked at properties and the Villages representative went out of his way to interest them in a house of their own when they gushed over the beauty of The Villages.

If you can afford to do so, I agree that renting a home for a time is a good way to see if this is a good place for you, if you're nervous. I would suggest a newer neighborhood if you're in the 50's to 60's in terms of age so that your neighbors are in your age group.

I can almost guarantee you'll love it. Just about everyone does.

[billethkid]

Most people whether in TV or any where else take evrybody at face value.
Nobody cares if you are Irish, Catholic, Jewish, black, brown, or what ever.

None of this stuff is relevant to getting a t time....a restaurant reservation or an invitation to a neighborhood function.

If one has a sign on their back saying hey! I am a _ _ ? _ _ can I come and play?

If you are a responsible citizen respecting the rules of life (as most do) there is no problem.

I am old enough to remember when it was in to brag about having a black as a friend. To most of us what your preferences are is a non event...unless or until one tries to convert everybody to their belief.

btk

[Pats2010]

Um, I didn't say Sal said it. I said IRISH ROVER said it (or at least implied it).

I meant Irish Rover and I meant what I said.

[Pats2010]

Don't you dare tell me that my response was for some PC reason, my answer is genuine. I have friends both here in Mass and down in TV who are gay, straight, black, white, conservative, liberal and every tone in between.

Sal asked for your opinion and you gave it and I'll respect that. But don't ever tell someone else why you think I answered a question.

Why don't you give the guy a break, he didn't say anything to you. I don't think Rover meant any real malice to anybody. Why so defensive?

[graciegirl]

Yes, the jester is a sign of levity and that's how the "breeder" comment should have been taken. The longer this thread goes on, Salvador will see the true colors of TV, and they are not the colors of the rainbow.

Dear Kentucky Blue.

I don't think you can really tell how we are here in The Villages. Please forgive me for being impatient and correct me if I am wrong. You have visited here twice and do not live here?

This forum probably doesn't really represent the feeling of TV either. We are probably an unusual group who likes to interact on line. The individuals of the villages might have a different take on things.

I don't know how everyone thinks here, or what their attitude is either. We have owned a home for a little over two years.

The many people that I have met that live in The Villages seem to have strong opinions on things and yet most also have an open mind and there are so many with caring hearts.

I think that because of our age and our courage in starting a new life in a new place that we perhaps could be thought of as a group of open minded pioneers. I find that life has rounded off many a rough edge and sharp answer too. There is always a chance to meet a person who has always been unhappy or angry or intolerant. But it is my good fortune to have not found many like that.

Salvador. Please come down here and check us out.

Kentucky Blue....PLEASE stay longer the next time you are here.

Gracie.

P.S. Redwitch. I don't have rose colored glasses. I can find a lot of reasons to be down and negative. It is harder to stay up and see the positive in things, but worth the effort, in my very humble opinion.

[duffysmom]

:popcorn:Oh Boy, this is starting to sound like the political forum. I said it before and I'll say it again, TV is like an adjustable wrench, it will fit any kind of nut....:evil6:

Salvador, I don't think you will have a problem and I for one would love to have you and your partner as neighbors. When it come to neighbors, I want neighbors who are quiet and respectful, their sexual orientation or political views are of no concern to me.

[Shirleevee]

Don't you dare tell me that my response was for some PC reason, my answer is genuine. I have friends both here in Mass and down in TV who are gay, straight, black, white, conservative, liberal and every tone in between.

Sal asked for your opinion and you gave it and I'll respect that. But don't ever tell someone else why you think I answered a question.

Ditto Russ!:pepper2:

[Russ_Boston]

Thanks Shirl -

Sal - I think you get the jist of it: Come down, try it for yourself, be yourself and make a decision for yourself. I think you'll love it.

My last comment on this thread.

[Pturner]

Dear Kentucky Blue.

I don't think you can really tell how we are here in The Villages. Please forgive me for being impatient and correct me if I am wrong. You have visited here twice and do not live here?

This forum probably doesn't really represent the feeling of TV either. We are probably an unusual group who likes to interact on line. The individuals of the villages might have a different take on things.

I don't know how everyone thinks here, or what their attitude is either. We have owned a home for a little over two years.

The many people that I have met that live in The Villages seem to have strong opinions on things and yet most also have an open mind and there are so many with caring hearts.

I think that because of our age and our courage in starting a new life in a new place that we perhaps could be thought of as a group of open minded pioneers. I find that life has rounded off many a rough edge and sharp answer too. There is always a chance to meet a person who has always been unhappy or angry or intolerant. But it is my good fortune to have not found many like that.

Salvador. Please come down here and check us out.

Kentucky Blue....PLEASE stay longer the next time you are here.

Gracie.

P.S. Redwitch. I don't have rose colored glasses. I can find a lot of reasons to be down and negative. It is harder to stay up and see the positive in things, but worth the effort, in my very humble opinion.

Again, what Gracie said.

They don't call her a sage for nothing!

[Salvador]

PS. Not sure dropping the term "breeder" is a great way to make new friends; sounds like we're the creepy aliens in a Sci-fi movie.

Hi Grayesun, and everyone else who has weighed in.

We have some great comments here.

Much apologies about using that esoteric word Breeder, it wasn't meant to offend, and it isn't part of my daily vocabulary.

The origin of that word derives from the late 1970's when the alternative community, after rehabilitating their designated urban neighborhood, noticed that many child rearing families would start to move in and change the nature of the community, and at that time, that type of change wasn't considered desirable.

Now days, the alternative community seeks out inclusion, and has become much more family friendly, so that word no longer has a negative connotations, and has just become synonymous with "straight".

I actually used the word as a good nature nudge/wink to the relatively child free environment that The Villages seek to maintain (presumably)........

.........that's why I'm a bit perplexed about the offense, but never-the-less, I regret the choice of word used, and hope this post will help us all get past the distraction.

Let's pass the peace pipe on this one......:beer3:

[brostholder]

you guys are welcome to live next to me and my wife anytime!!

[Salvador]

you guys are welcome to live next to me and my wife anytime!!

and I lastly want to add that you would all be welcomed over to our place.

I make the perfect pimm's cup, a drink worthy of British royalty, and would all be anxious that you would agree after trying. We make other delicious treats too.

My partner and I are both active in "doctors without borders" , are world travelers, and have many interesting stories and artifacts to add to the discussion.

We maintain our properties nicely, and try to accommodate our neighbors territorial request and eccentricities within reason.

Hope to see you all soon. :wave:

[bkcunningham1]

Hello.

Got a bit of a question.

How are homosexual couples received in The Villages?? Would people resent living next to one??? Would it catch a lot of attention?? You know....stares and ogles and whispers....would the good old fashioned folks not want to shake hands :confused:

To give you some background, my partner, a physician and golf nut, is reaching retirement age and we would like to relocate to Florida from the mid-west. However, after visiting the gay retirement havens of Ft. Lauderdale/South Beach/Miami Beach a couple times, we decided the culture there wasn't for us (very youth centric and superficial among other things).

We are discrete and conduct our lives conservatively (not Tuba players, so to speak) and don't necessarily seek out diversity--

--but would living in the Villages be pushing the envelope too far???

Any thoughts on how the straights (or breeders :jester:) here feel about the issue??

PS.......be as honest or cruel as you want to be, because I would like to gauge the true sentiment of the community.


I have read the posts responding to Salvador's questions. I have hesitated to respond but I am going to say something. No offense to all of you with the best intentions inviting Salvador to be your neighbor. No offense to you Salvador.

I don't know you, and in fairness, I don't know the wonderful inviting folks who want you to move in next door, sight unseen just because you are gay or for whatever it was in your question that leads them to believe you'd be a good neighbor.

What if Salvador and his partner have big noisy dogs that use your yard as their bathrooms? Or what if they play their music too loud or invite relatives with young kids to use the adult only pools? What if they don't cut their grass or mow too early?

It is just so silly, and please don't misunderstand what I'm saying. Who knows if he'd be a good neighbor. The point is to judge someone on who they are as a person. You aren't going to like everyone who is gay or straight or bisexual or swingers...red and yellow black and white. We are all different. Just because Salvador is gay it isn't going to make him a good neighbor or a bad neighbor.

"Would people resent living next to one?" you asked. Who knows Salvador. That's life. You take your chances. Life is what you make it to be. But I'll tell you one thing, if you have a good relationship with your doctor partner, you enjoy being together and having fun; if you like the sunshine and warm welcoming people, TV is for you.

[grayesun]

Hi Grayesun, and everyone else who has weighed in.

We have some great comments here.

Much apologies about using that esoteric word Breeder, it wasn't meant to offend, and it isn't part of my daily vocabulary.

The origin of that word derives from the late 1970's when the alternative community, after rehabilitating their designated urban neighborhood, noticed that many child rearing families would start to move in and change the nature of the community, and at that time, that type of change wasn't considered desirable.

Now days, the alternative community seeks out inclusion, and has become much more family friendly, so that word no longer has a negative connotations, and has just become synonymous with "straight".

I actually used the word as a good nature nudge/wink to the relatively child free environment that The Villages seek to maintain (presumably)........

.........that's why I'm a bit perplexed about the offense, but never-the-less, I regret the choice of word used, and hope this post will help us all get past the distraction.

Let's pass the peace pipe on this one......:beer3:

Thanks for rejoining the rumble here Salvador and glad you explained.
As you described the negative roots of the term "breeder"; it continues to carry the negative connotation for a lot of us and remains one of those volatile words probably best not used on a public talk forum...like many of those old words used for gay people, before the word "gay" was co-opted. We all know better than to use certain unsavory words in any public forum, just as matter of decency & respect for others, who would likely be offended or embarassed. Breeder at worst is ugly & offensive...at best flippant & disrespectful.
Now if we were to get together & play some golf, share some beers, get to know each other...who knows what ripe words might be thrown back and forth during a match...all in fun...how would that sit with you & your partner? But, it's doubtful any exchange of spicy words even in fun, in private and between friends would include "breeder" or some of those old words for gays I've long ago dispatched. Hope you guys seriously consider moving down here and joining the fun; look at all the interesting convolutions from your "simple" little inquiry. Cheers back atcha! :beer3:

[grayesun]

I have read the posts responding to Salvador's questions. I have hesitated to respond but I am going to say something. No offense to all of you with the best intentions inviting Salvador to be your neighbor. No offense to you Salvador.

I don't know you, and in fairness, I don't know the wonderful inviting folks who want you to move in next door, sight unseen just because you are gay or for whatever it was in your question that leads them to believe you'd be a good neighbor.

What if Salvador and his partner have big noisy dogs that use your yard as their bathrooms? Or what if they play their music too loud or invite relatives with young kids to use the adult only pools? What if they don't cut their grass or mow too early?

It is just so silly, and please don't misunderstand what I'm saying. Who knows if he'd be a good neighbor. The point is to judge someone on who they are as a person. You aren't going to like everyone who is gay or straight or bisexual or swingers...red and yellow black and white. We are all different. Just because Salvador is gay it isn't going to make him a good neighbor or a bad neighbor.

"Would people resent living next to one?" you asked. Who knows Salvador. That's life. You take your chances. Life is what you make it to be. But I'll tell you one thing, if you have a good relationship with your doctor partner, you enjoy being together and having fun; if and you like the sunshine and warm welcoming people, TV is for you.

Well stated...if I were Salvador, I might be offended for being considered a neighborhood status symbol!! :1rotfl: Or perhaps, he might consider taking bids on who wants him the most as a neighbor. As Don Imus frequently claims..."you can't make this stuff up".

[graciegirl]

I have read the posts responding to Salvador's questions. I have hesitated to respond but I am going to say something. No offense to all of you with the best intentions inviting Salvador to be your neighbor. No offense to you Salvador.

I don't know you, and in fairness, I don't know the wonderful inviting folks who want you to move in next door, sight unseen just because you are gay or for whatever it was in your question that leads them to believe you'd be a good neighbor.

What if Salvador and his partner have big noisy dogs that use your yard as their bathrooms? Or what if they play their music too loud or invite relatives with young kids to use the adult only pools? What if they don't cut their grass or mow too early?

It is just so silly, and please don't misunderstand what I'm saying. Who knows if he'd be a good neighbor. The point is to judge someone on who they are as a person. You aren't going to like everyone who is gay or straight or bisexual or swingers...red and yellow black and white. We are all different. Just because Salvador is gay it isn't going to make him a good neighbor or a bad neighbor.

"Would people resent living next to one?" you asked. Who knows Salvador. That's life. You take your chances. Life is what you make it to be. But I'll tell you one thing, if you have a good relationship with your doctor partner, you enjoy being together and having fun; if and you like the sunshine and warm welcoming people, TV is for you.

Very well said and very fair BK. No one likes to be patronized.

Sal...Can Sweetie and I accept your invitation to try the Pimms cup? In case you come down and like it and buy a house and is it possible to make mine without alcohol? When I drink it, I think I am intelligent.:shrug:

Oh...and I used to be a breeder but I found out what caused it.:laugh:

Two was plenty.

[Pats2010]

Very well said and very fair BK. No one likes to be patronized.

Sal...Can Sweetie and I accept your invitation to try the Pimms cup? In case you come down and like it and buy a house and is it possible to make mine without alcohol? When I drink it, I think I am intelligent.:shrug:

t.:laugh:
Oh...and I used to be a breeder but I found out what caused it
Two was plenty.
:a20:
You crack me up, Gracie. LOL

[jojo]

Gracie, Get yourself back down here. I miss you. And Salvador, you're on my list to meet. TV is ineffable (one of my favorite words meaning beyond description!) Now I'm sounding like Gracie. Oh my!

[downeaster]

Oh...and I used to be a breeder but I found out what caused it.:laugh:

.

Sharing toothbrush, right?

[ssmith]

Now this has been interesting reading. I was screaming to say some of what you all said.

Like BK...I was thinking that people shoud be evaluated on an individual basis...like are they friendly, keep up their house...etc.... and then I got to thinking...you know we like to put labels on people...that is just so sad...eventhough I have not met many of you...I think you would label me "a conservative" after all I am from the midwest ;) but that does not mean that I would object to Salvador(sp?). I haven't even met Salvitor (sp?).

Also Thistruck seems to have taken quite a lashing for his comments. Hope he/she has not been terribly offended. I have moved often and have found that some people are friendly...they just don't want to be your friend or at least not right now. This occurs because they already have their friends, their life is set, or they are just too busy. That does not mean anything bad about you, but it may mean you have to pursue friendship more. This occurs everywhere not just in TV. I am afraid I have been that person at times.

Also, we have visited TV and I would not expect people to open their lives to us knowing that we would be coming and going. That takes an emotional and time investment and who knows...we could be some sort of internet stalkers or some other kind of weirdo. That is a reflection of the world we live in. best to be a bit cautious.

I guess my take on it is...I hope I am not one who "judges" people by labels or at all for that matter and eventhough TV is near perfect...nothing is perfect this side of heaven.

[kentucky blue]

Sharing toothbrush, right?
That's not what i heard..........The wife needs to stand on her head while observing a full moon.Just make sure your husband was an olympic gymnast, or there could be a small problem with the dismount!!!!!:pepper2:

[graciegirl]

S Smith. You sound like friend material to me!

Kentucky Blue. TMI :a20:

[rick2071]

Scrapple? I'm there!

Unfortunately I won't be there full-time for another year or so. But from what I know about scrapple, it will hold.

Salvatore - You notice how we veer off topic a lot?:)

if Happy Hour is at five, move right in this weekend, it has been said that villagers the clebrate happy hour have a golfing problem

[Taltarzac]

Our family friend has always described kids as rugrats. He is a heterosexual male. 'Breeders" might be a word our straight friend would use to those people with rugrats.

[Pturner]

Is this a TOTV thread or a script for a sitcom? If the latter, it's going to be the new All in the Family, full of hilarity and insight at once.

In how many other threads has somebody said he/she is moving to TV or might come to TV or is interested in TV? And what reaction do they get from many of us?

Come on down! Live in my Village! I'll leave the lights on for you! Stop by my house! I'd love to have you for a neighbor!

And yes, it's true. We don't know the person we are inviting into our neighborhood, our home, our "circle". Sure, we might end up not liking that person or not being glad if he/she is a neighbor. Yet it would be a misperception to say we are insincere. We are expressing our "inner Villager," offering our kool aid, expressing our heart-felt desire that this person will be happy here and fit right in, as most Villagers seemingly do.

Many of us say all these things to new posters, not knowing their color or politics or religious beliefs or sexual orientation. Yet, we welcome Salvador in the same "It's-a-beautiful-day-in-the-Villages" kind of way (which it is), and suddenly, we're only doing it because he's gay?

Welcome to All in the Family, circa 2010.

:popcorn:

[graciegirl]

Is this a TOTV thread or a script for a sitcom? If the latter, it's going to be the new All in the Family, full of hilarity and insight at once.

In how many other threads has somebody said he/she is moving to TV or might come to TV or is interested in TV? And what reaction do they get from many of us?

Come on down! Live in my Village! I'll leave the lights on for you! Stop by my house! I'd love to have you for a neighbor!

And yes, it's true. We don't know the person we are inviting into our neighborhood, our home, our "circle". Sure, we might end up not liking that person or not being glad if he/she is a neighbor. Yet it would be a misperception to say we are insincere. We are expressing our "inner Villager," offering our kool aid, expressing our heart-felt desire that this person will be happy here and fit right in, as most Villagers seemingly do.

Many of us say all these things to new posters, not knowing their color or politics or religious beliefs or sexual orientation. Yet, we welcome Salvador in the same "It's-a-beautiful-day-in-the-Villages" kind of way (which it is), and suddenly, we're only doing it because he's gay?

Welcome to All in the Family, circa 2010.

:popcorn:

She is correct as usual.

[carolynpage]

I do not see a problem here.:welcome:

Try the life style or rent for a month to try it out.

[MelZ]

Our family friend has always described kids as rug rats. He is a heterosexual male. 'Breeders" might be a word our straight friend would use to those people with rugrats.

So let me understand If I call you a pejorative and I add a joker it's OK. If Sal was heterosexual but a minority and called you a "cracker", "gringo"....etal would you still be so forgiving.

Intolerance and bigotry can't be justified by "jokers" and self serving analogies.

I can only take Political Correctness so far. Call me a pejorative and my reaction might be a little more "blunt".

[Lou Card]

:shrug:Why would anyone want to turn this post sour?

[MelZ]

:shrug:Why would anyone want to turn this post sour?

Maybe because ignoring intolerance is the name of political correctness is just plain wrong.

[uujudy]

and I lastly want to add that you would all be welcomed over to our place.

I make the perfect pimm's cup, a drink worthy of British royalty, and would all be anxious that you would agree after trying. We make other delicious treats too. . . . Hope to see you all soon. :wave:

Oh I loooove Pimm's Cup! I love delicious treats, too! The villa next door to me is for sale!
Judy

[BaylorBear]

I think it's about time we hung this one up, folks! If people are nice they will fit in beautifully, if they are not nice, they won't. Nuf said!:wave:

[graciegirl]

So let me understand If I call you a pejorative and I add a joker it's OK. If Sal was heterosexual but a minority and called you a "cracker", "gringo"....etal would you still be so forgiving.

Intolerance and bigotry can't be justified by "jokers" and self serving analogies.

I can only take Political Correctness so far. Call me a pejorative and my reaction might be a little more "blunt".

Dearest MelZ and beautiful Pauline.

I promise I will NEVER call you a pejorative. Is it O.K. if I call you New Yorkers?

Love and Kindest wishes,
Gracie (the kraut)

P.S. pejorative is a new word for me.:thumbup:

[duffysmom]

GG, for a lot of people in the south, New Yorker is a pejorative statement. :undecided:

[Pats2010]

GG, for a lot of people in the south, New Yorker is a pejorative statement. :undecided:

Funny you should say that. Pat Conroy's " The Prince of Tides" makes that very clear. I am one third my way through.

[duffysmom]

Pats2010, being a New Yooorker myself, I've experienced it.:throwtomatoes: Loved "Prince of Tides" and his new book is equally as good.

[Pats2010]

Pats2010, being a New Yooorker myself, I've experienced it.:throwtomatoes: Loved "Prince of Tides" and his new book is equally as good.

I read South of Broad a couple of weeks ago. My 1st Conroy read. It was real good.

[MelZ]

Dearest MelZ and beautiful Pauline.

I promise I will NEVER call you a pejorative. Is it O.K. if I call you New Yorkers?

Love and Kindest wishes,
Gracie (the kraut)

P.S. pejorative is a new word for me.:thumbup:

As Popeye says "I ams what I am", we are expatriate New Yorkers now. But you can call me anything except late for dinner.:icon_hungry:

[bkcunningham1]

As Popeye says "I ams what I am", we are expatriate New Yorkers now. But you can call me anything except late for dinner.:icon_hungry:

My husband is from New York and has lived in the south long enough to be called a damned yankee. That's a regular yankee who becomes expatriated to the south permanently.

[downeaster]

My husband is from New York and has lived in the south long enough to be called a damned yankee. That's a regular yankee who becomes expatriated to the south permanently.

The way I heard it is: A Yankee is anyone from north of the Mason Dixon Line. A Damned Yankee, as you point out, is one that moves here.

[Lou Card]

Most true southerners do not consider Florida as part of the South.

[redwitch]

Most true southerners do not consider Florida as part of the South.

And that's the truth. :raspberry: (I did so love Edith Ann.)

[Pturner]

That's because, in Florida, they are not called Yankees. They are called snowbirds.

[Vinny]

I have never breed so I guess I am gay. Won't my wife be surprised. :laugh:

[Pats2010]

I have never breed so I guess I am gay. Won't my wife be surprised. :laugh:

My nephew was married for many years before he came out of the closet.

He didn't breed. He has been with the same boyfriend for many years now.

[Taltarzac]

"Just the other day, a popular radio talk show carried on a long discussion about the word 'breeder'. A news story had run about a heterosexual man who had been fired by his gay boss. He was claiming wrongful termination and says he was let go because he was straight. He claims he was repeatedly called a 'breeder' by his predominantly gay co-workers and boss. As it turns out, this word is used by homosexuals to describe heterosexuals. The radio show hosts questioned the very existence of this word and asked listeners to call in if they had any information. Within a couple of minutes, a gay man called in and confirmed the existence and use of the word. "

[cometgirl]

Come buy a house by us in the Village of Rio Grand, we would welcome you as neighbors.

[BaylorBear]

Most true southerners do not consider Florida as part of the South.

Well, Lou, I'm a true southerner and I do consider Florida a part of the South as do most of my confreres!:BigApplause:

[Boudicca]

Double Ditto "what Gracie said".
We lived in Virginia where hubby was professional actor. Many of our friends in the theater groups were gay (male and female). All I can add is "welcome to Shangri-la" SHR:a040:

[CtJim]

Hello.

Got a bit of a question.

How are homosexual couples received in The Villages?? Would people resent living next to one??? Would it catch a lot of attention?? You know....stares and ogles and whispers....would the good old fashioned folks not want to shake hands :confused:

To give you some background, my partner, a physician and golf nut, is reaching retirement age and we would like to relocate to Florida from the mid-west. However, after visiting the gay retirement havens of Ft. Lauderdale/South Beach/Miami Beach a couple times, we decided the culture there wasn't for us (very youth centric and superficial among other things).

We are discrete and conduct our lives conservatively (not Tuba players, so to speak) and don't necessarily seek out diversity--

--but would living in the Villages be pushing the envelope too far???

Any thoughts on how the straights (or breeders :jester:) here feel about the issue??

PS.......be as honest or cruel as you want to be, because I would like to gauge the true sentiment of the community.
Salvador - My partner and I are moving to The Villages in October of this year. We had/have the same questions you posed, but are greatly encouraged after meeting several gay people, each of whom has reported being accepted and made to feel comfortable. We hope you will let us know if you should visit TV after October 1 (or get in touch). We would be able to give you the reactions we have received. We love diversity and wish to socialize with people from all walks of life. Our feeling is we will find this in The Villages and are moving with the a positive imagine that this in fact will be the case. I wish you the best as you determine your future.
Jim