Wedding gift?

[Heartnsoul]

Haven't attended a wedding in awhile. I know yrs ago it was $100 in a card. How much is it today for say a niece?
And I know this isn't revelant but is costing approximately $3,999 to attend

[Stu from NYC]

Probably triple that amount at least.

How close are you to her?

[JSR22]

The past few years we have been giving$500 to family members.

[JMintzer]

Probably triple that amount at least.

How close are you to her?

Yup!

The past few years we have been giving$500 to family members.

Same here. But it depends on one's financial situation...

$500 for some is like $1000 to others...

[JSR22]

Yup!



Same here. But it depends on one's financial situation...

$500 for some is like $1000 to others...
To be honest if it is a favorite I give more and generous engagement and shower gifts.

[CFrance]

We have a very small family. Two sons, a niece and a nephew. For the nephew, we gave $1000 seven years ago along with helping them with a small part of the wedding costs. In 2010 and 2012 our sons were given $1000 by their aunt & uncle. If our niece ever marries her s/o, we'll do something similar.

[walterray1]

Haven't attended a wedding in awhile. I know yrs ago it was $100 in a card. How much is it today for say a niece?
And I know this isn't revelant but is costing approximately $3,999 to attend

would one come on TOTV and ask this question? We dont have kids and give to our nieces and nephews for all the holidays. We know what to give. You dont?

[JoMar]

would one come on TOTV and ask this question? We dont have kids and give to our nieces and nephews for all the holidays. We know what to give. You dont?

Not everyone may be able to do what you do so that shot wasn't necessary. Also, OP was asking about a wedding which is different then the holiday's.

[tsmall22204]

I say that you give from the heart not from what others say.

[jswirs]

would one come on TOTV and ask this question? We dont have kids and give to our nieces and nephews for all the holidays. We know what to give. You dont?
No reason to be mean spirited. Live and Let Live is what I say.
In answer to the OP's question, really, it all depends on your financial situation. I recently saw children in our family, nieces and nephews, which I have not seen in a few years. We gave each one, and there were 7 of them, $100.00 in a card, just for doing well in school and sports. It's what I feel comfortable doing, and the OP needs to feel comfortable as well.

[Girlcopper]

Haven't attended a wedding in awhile. I know yrs ago it was $100 in a card. How much is it today for say a niece?
And I know this isn't revelant but is costing approximately $3,999 to attend
You give what you want to and can afford. If you cant afford to attend. Dont

[Annie66]

would one come on TOTV and ask this question? We dont have kids and give to our nieces and nephews for all the holidays. We know what to give. You dont?

What a snarky response. Did you get up on the wrong side of the bed?

[Catalina36]

I say you give what you can afford. $3999.00 to attend any wedding is a great deal of money. You are being very generous to spend that much money just to attend. I read where some people stated they gave hundreds and thousands of dollars as a wedding gift.
Each persons financial situation is different. What if you had 6 nieces, that could be very costly? Again give what you can afford and they should be grateful that you are attending, no matter how much money you give.

[Mlogan22@tampabay.rr.com]

$500.

[Flanman]

A card with $100 is a generous gift even today. You are paying to travel to be with family and that’s the most important thing-being there. We are going to Colorado for a family wedding in September. We will give a nice card and most likely $100 as a gift.

[donassaid]

$500? $1000? For a wedding gift for a niece? I guess we do live in a land of the rich. Personally, I think $100 is a very generous gift that any niece would be grateful for.

[algi45]

would one come on TOTV and ask this question? We dont have kids and give to our nieces and nephews for all the holidays. We know what to give. You dont?

Why the hostility?

[J1ceasar]

Kristoff congratulations to the couple I guess no one else has said yet. The answer that most newspaper column this will give, is that what you give what you feel is in your heart. Honestly if you think back to your wedding do you remember what everyone gave you 40 or 50 years later? However I guarantee that the parents and the in-laws will ask how much did so-and-so give and how much did so-and-so give and no one will think what it cost you to attend. However if you can afford $4,000 to go out there and be with them and celebrate yes I know it's a lot to go somewhere but my 40 year old child will spend $1,000 to visit a friend to celebrate a birthday please keep that in mind. You should also realize what what it cost to make a wedding easily 200 or $300 per person so with that in mind I would say in four hundred or $500 and don't think about the money so much as it's a one-time expense of life. If the $4,000 is too much money and figure out another way of going that would be cheaper or maybe a lesser Hotel you can get a timeshare or not stay at the wedding Hotel. Just to make you feel well we have going to Palm Springs for one daughter's wedding and we went to Germany for a nephew's wedding I know me too ouch

[CoachKandSportsguy]

would one come on TOTV and ask this question? We dont have kids and give to our nieces and nephews for all the holidays. We know what to give. You dont?

Note to self: walterray is all knowing, so always remember to ask the poster for all advice.

walterray, what should I give my niece and nephews for Christmas, since we should all follow your lead since you do and I don't.

Many thanks in advance

dumb guy

[Blackbird45]

What you have to keep in mind if you are attending, the meal that they will be serving you and what ever entertainment will be over $100. Not that, this should determine your gift, but you should factor that in.

[Tomptomp]

Approximately $3999 ?
I close loved one is one consideration, otherwise I fill in the check at the reception. Minimum, of course , is the cost of the plate.

[shueburruss]

would one come on TOTV and ask this question? We dont have kids and give to our nieces and nephews for all the holidays. We know what to give. You dont?

I have to ask “why would one come on TOTV and reply with such a remark”? The question was simple, genuine and within the guidelines of TOTV.

[Looking for next wife]

Laughing out Loud for sure.

A person asks a simple harmless question, seemingly basically out of curiosity, to hopefully, share some current thinking on the subject; and some one just simply cannot leave it at that and avoid trying to turn it into another verbal villages s***show. Man, get happy.

Welcome to the Villages.

I left this ridiculous bastardized run on sentence for you all to fight over.

[sdm1222]

How Much Money Should I Give for a Wedding Gift | The Wedding Envelope (https://www.theweddingenvelope.com/calculatordonation)

Here's a link to a website that calculates what you should give based on relationship, travel, etc.

[msilagy]

At the very least try and pay for what it cost to have you at the wedding. $3999 is for what? Seems a bit odd.......$100 is cheap today btw.

[barbnick]

We give $500

[jimkerr]

Haven't attended a wedding in awhile. I know yrs ago it was $100 in a card. How much is it today for say a niece?
And I know this isn't revelant but is costing approximately $3,999 to attend

Give whatever you feel is right. There is nothing wrong with $100.00

[Spalumbos62]

would one come on TOTV and ask this question? We dont have kids and give to our nieces and nephews for all the holidays. We know what to give. You dont?


Obviously not! Hence the question. I think it's a great one...so far so many different answers, very interesting.

[Ewhite]

You should check to see if the couple have an online "wedding gift registry" where they have listed gifts they would like to receive. If they do have a registry, you can order the gift directly on line through the company they have shown the gift is with.

[golfing eagles]

Haven't attended a wedding in awhile. I know yrs ago it was $100 in a card. How much is it today for say a niece?
And I know this isn't revelant but is costing approximately $3,999 to attend

My last relative to get married was my nephew in 2009 and I gave $500.

$3999 (approx., but not $4,000) ????
Is this a destination wedding? Is it a 2 week stay in Hawaii, because that sounds pretty high for just the cost to attend

[meridian5850]

We had 2 nephews get married in the last few years. Our gift was $500.

[admiral72]

How Much Money Should I Give for a Wedding Gift | The Wedding Envelope (https://www.theweddingenvelope.com/calculatordonation)

Here's a link to a website that calculates what you should give based on relationship, travel, etc.


That was pretty cool

[jrandall]

Ditto

[Eg_cruz]

A card with $100 is a generous gift even today. You are paying to travel to be with family and that’s the most important thing-being there. We are going to Colorado for a family wedding in September. We will give a nice card and most likely $100 as a gift.
So funny I have a wedding in CO in Sept as well

[Heartnsoul]

Thank you to those who were courteous enough to answer. In answer to your question, I hit a 999 instead of ooo should have been approximately 3,000 to attend. Flight to NY was almost $700, car rental in NY IS $500, (for a compact budget car) HOTEL IN NY IS $500 FOR only 3 nights, (discounted rate)transportation to Orlando airport $200 both ways, pet sitter $150, a round of golf with my sister $100 two days prior to wedding, food, gas, etc all add up. I only asked because it's been yrs since I've attended a wedding. I asked a couple friends and they haven't attended a wedding in yrs so we're not sure either. Now I have my answer. Thank u

[Baitoro@hotmail.com]

Haven't attended a wedding in awhile. I know yrs ago it was $100 in a card. How much is it today for say a niece?
And I know this isn't revelant but is costing approximately $3,999 to attend

I have $500 to my nieces and nephew but since they have all been married about 20 years now, the ante may have gone up. I usually give $300 for non-family weddings. But, then again, being from NY/NJ we’re used to everything being higher there…

[Gizemo33]

There are a number of questions that you should be considering. Am I going to travel to attend the wedding? The answer should consider will all of the attendees have received the vaccinations. How much do I really like the individual getting married. How much do I really like some of the people that I will see. How much is it going to cost to get there.

After pondering all of these questions, then based upon your financial ability you put a check in an envelope and mail it and graciously decline attending or you put the check in the envelope travel and incur all the expenses and hand the check with a kiss on the cheek.

Remember only kiss on the cheek if they are fully vaccinated. I hope this helps you make a decision.


Haven't attended a wedding in awhile. I know yrs ago it was $100 in a card. How much is it today for say a niece?
And I know this isn't revelant but is costing approximately $3,999 to attend

[graciegirl]

Thank you to those who were courteous enough to answer. In answer to your question, I hit a 999 instead of ooo should have been approximately 3,000 to attend. Flight to NY was almost $700, car rental in NY IS $500, (for a compact budget car) HOTEL IN NY IS $500 FOR only 3 nights, (discounted rate)transportation to Orlando airport $200 both ways, pet sitter $150, a round of golf with my sister $100 two days prior to wedding, food, gas, etc all add up. I only asked because it's been yrs since I've attended a wedding. I asked a couple friends and they haven't attended a wedding in yrs so we're not sure either. Now I have my answer. Thank u

Found this;

How Much Do You Spend On A Wedding Gift?
The amount of money you spend on a wedding gift depends on your relationship with the bride and groom. You’ll want to consider how close you are to the happy couple before purchasing a gift so your selection is appropriate. When it comes to general gift etiquette though, try not to spend less than $50 on a wedding gift no matter your relationship with the couple. Follow our suggested spending categories below, organized by your relationship with the bride or groom:

Close Friend or Close Relative: $150+
Friend or Relative: $100-$125
Co-Worker, Distant Family-Friend, or Distant Relative: $50-$100

[kendi]

Wow! It’s amazing how much people give for weddings. I say each situation is different. Depends on what you can afford, are willing to give and the nature of the relationship. Can’t base it on what others say. Even if you can afford to give hundreds and thousands it’s not always a good choice.

[murinace@aol.com]

We try to figure the cost Per/person for the event then double that. We then add a little for extra.

[Lisanp@aol.com]

Haven't attended a wedding in awhile. I know yrs ago it was $100 in a card. How much is it today for say a niece?
And I know this isn't revelant but is costing approximately $3,999 to attend

I have always been taught that it is appropriate to "cover the cost of your plate". Thus if two are attending, and you estimate that the venue is costing the family $125pp, you should try to give $250 (and more if it is someone very close to you). That said, if the travel expenses alone are a stretch for your budget, give them a meaningful gift from your family - a piece from your family history if you are able to share something (the vase from your grandmother), or even a high-quality copy of a cherished family photo in a beautiful frame (ie the wedding photo of the great grandparents the bride descended from that are your grandparents?) along with a handwritten note.

[Krice45]

Haven't attended a wedding in awhile. I know yrs ago it was $100 in a card. How much is it today for say a niece?
And I know this isn't revelant but is costing approximately $3,999 to attend

If they are on a gift registry, Bed Bath Beyond etc, you can select a gift they want within your budget and have it shipped to their house.

[cbmerl]

would one come on TOTV and ask this question? We dont have kids and give to our nieces and nephews for all the holidays. We know what to give. You dont?

Wow....you can't get much nastier than that!! Shame on you!

[golfgal44]

I have been wondering the same exact thing. What to give to a girl who was a neighbor and who I loved as a child, but has been out of the neighborhood living with her boyfriend for a few years already. her parent moved away two years ago and I’m sure we’ll never see any of them again. Now, at least 5 years later, she’s finally getting married with the reception on a Friday night in a steakhouse on Long Island, for about 200 people, 1 year after the original wedding was postponed due to covid. I haven’t been to a wedding in years. What is appropriate for a single person to give for a typical, Italian, New York wedding. Anyone from New York knows what New York weddings are like.



Haven't attended a wedding in awhile. I know yrs ago it was $100 in a card. How much is it today for say a niece?
And I know this isn't revelant but is costing approximately $3,999 to attend

[Pginbr]

Tos

[Spikearoni]

Found this;

How Much Do You Spend On A Wedding Gift?
The amount of money you spend on a wedding gift depends on your relationship with the bride and groom. You’ll want to consider how close you are to the happy couple before purchasing a gift so your selection is appropriate. When it comes to general gift etiquette though, try not to spend less than $50 on a wedding gift no matter your relationship with the couple. Follow our suggested spending categories below, organized by your relationship with the bride or groom:

Close Friend or Close Relative: $150+
Friend or Relative: $100-$125
Co-Worker, Distant Family-Friend, or Distant Relative: $50-$100

These suggestions are outdated. When was this info written?

[Jerry Leinsing]

Haven't attended a wedding in awhile. I know yrs ago it was $100 in a card. How much is it today for say a niece?
And I know this isn't revelant but is costing approximately $3,999 to attend

Your right it isn't relevant. This is your brother or sister's kid. If you like her, send a nest egg: $500 or $1000. If you don't, you have it about right.

What else are you going to do with this money and who is going to get it when you die?
Your on the wrong end of life so impress family before you go.
Just saying...

[xcaligirl]

What a snarky response. Did you get up on the wrong side of the bed?
EXACTLY!! I guess some people still have not learned how to SCROLL ON!!

[davem4616]

Attending weddings can be very expensive....after all if you travel a great distance to get back to where 'home' was, you really want to stay awhile

years ago we passed on attending a niece's wedding that was held in Ireland...too costly at the time and we didn't have that much vacation time...so we gave them a larger gift than we would have, had we gone.

We spent about $4K attending a 1st cousin's child's wedding a couple of years ago...we gave the couple $500.

A few years before that we spent about that much on gifts for another cousin's child's...we weren't able to attend the wedding at the last minute due to a medical issue, so we ended up saving the $3+K that we would have spent on travel...BUT we missed out on having a great time with family members that we only get to see at weddings and funerals

Ya can't take it with ya, so give what you can...remember everything costs a lot more now than it did

[coconutmama]

Haven't attended a wedding in awhile. I know yrs ago it was $100 in a card. How much is it today for say a niece?
And I know this isn't revelant but is costing approximately $3,999 to attend

Thanks for starting this thread. I will be in a similar situation soon and was wondering the same thing

[Coley]

You give what you want to and can afford. If you cant afford to attend. Dont

Give 2000.00 and don't go--save 2Gs and I'm sure the bride and groom will be delighted!!

[kathy44]

No one seems to be mentioning that when the bride and groom get married they are inviting people to be with them who they want to share the day with. I have always felt that you do not need to even cover the cost of the meal because you are an invited guest. So it's not the amount of money it's maybe how close you are to the bride and groom you are their guests it shouldn't have a dollar sign on it. If you're giving them cash you give them what you can afford

[DaleDivine]

Give 2000.00 and don't go--save 2Gs and I'm sure the bride and groom will be delighted!!
I agree, Unless you want to play golf with your sister.
:ho::ho:

[Lil GTO]

Stay home and give them 4K. It’ll help them tremendously and you won’t be out any more than you would’ve anyway.

I say you give what you can afford. $3999.00 to attend any wedding is a great deal of money. You are being very generous to spend that much money just to attend. I read where some people stated they gave hundreds and thousands of dollars as a wedding gift.
Each persons financial situation is different. What if you had 6 nieces, that could be very costly? Again give what you can afford and they should be grateful that you are attending, no matter how much money you give.

[golfing eagles]

Give 2000.00 and don't go--save 2Gs and I'm sure the bride and groom will be delighted!!

Not really the point of the OP, is it?????

[jbartle1]

Last gift given to family member, Crystal glasses that I hand painted, they were thrilled.

[retiredguy123]

I'm going to start charging a fee to attend weddings, unless there is an open bar.

[JoeinFL]

What a snarky response. Did you get up on the wrong side of the bed?

Probably from underneath it. :-/

[skippy05]

Don't go and send them a Better Homes and Gardens Cookbook as a gift.

[MaryShields]

Not everyone may be able to do what you do so that shot wasn't necessary. Also, OP was asking about a wedding which is different then the holiday's.
I agree. That shot wasn’t called for. Actually I was glad someone asked! We are also flying back for a nieces wedding in Dec. $500 seems like an awful lot but it’s good to know that’s what the standard is today. I think I would send a gift from their registry instead of money.

[CZN715]

It all depends what they gave your children. It’s terrible but everyone keeps track. If you don’t have children, I would give $125.00 per person attending so that’s $250. That covers the dinner. $4,000 is a crazy amount to spend so just cover your dinners and that will be fine. People don’t “make money” on their weddings anymore because everything is so expensive.

[Nucky]

We give $500 to everyone. It’s what my wife wants to do so I don’t question the amount at all.

If it was costing 4K to get to the wedding then the $500 would be adjusted downward. That traveling cost would make me adjust the usual $500 gift without a doubt even if it ruffled some feathers.

OP, excellent question and my advice to you is give what you feel is proper. Covering the cost of the meal would be more then generous considering the $4000 traveling cost. Have a good time.

[frank1975]

If it’s costing that much to attend I wouldn’t attend.

[EASY1948]

One day's pay

[John41]

Haven't attended a wedding in awhile. I know yrs ago it was $100 in a card. How much is it today for say a niece?
And I know this isn't revelant but is costing approximately $3,999 to attend

We give $100 to $200 which should offset the cost of the dinner.

[Hopeful Returnee]

Haven't attended a wedding in awhile. I know yrs ago it was $100 in a card. How much is it today for say a niece?
And I know this isn't revelant but is costing approximately $3,999 to attend

I gave my niece $500 when she married 13 years ago but the wedding was within driving distance so there were no other expenses.

[DAVES]

An interesting thread. We just got an invite to a wedding. I suppose they had to invite us.
Did they expect we would go? I doubt it. The groom is my mother's sister''s daughters son. My aunt treated my mother very badly. Her son and daughter, mother of the groom treated me badly. They sent us a gorgeous invite. I sent them a check for $100. Issue avoided.

[DAVES]

We give $500 to everyone. It’s what my wife wants to do so I don’t question the amount at all.

If it was costing 4K to get to the wedding then the $500 would be adjusted downward. That traveling cost would make me adjust the usual $500 gift without a doubt even if it ruffled some feathers.

OP, excellent question and my advice to you is give what you feel is proper. Covering the cost of the meal would be more then generous considering the $4000 traveling cost. Have a good time.

"What my wife wants to do," Mostly, I do not care she is far more caring about normal stuff than I am. Is it important to me? Is it worth fighting about? If, it is I WILL DO WHAT I WANT.

Four thousand in traveling cost? Assuming it is a couple, where could the wedding be?

[Rapscallion St Croix]

My niece remarried in 2019 and as I am still waiting for a thank you note for the generous gift she received for her first wedding, she is still awaiting a gift for the second one.

[Prism]

would one come on TOTV and ask this question? We dont have kids and give to our nieces and nephews for all the holidays. We know what to give. You dont?

In a world where you can be anything, be kind.

[Ecuadog]

My niece remarried in 2019 and as I am still waiting for a thank you note for the generous gift she received for her first wedding, she is still awaiting a gift for the second one.

Love it.

[rjm1cc]

Guess it depends on how well off you are and how well off the couple will be.
Maybe decline the invitation - if the travel does not include other activities - and send $1000.

[Stu from NYC]

"What my wife wants to do," Mostly, I do not care she is far more caring about normal stuff than I am. Is it important to me? Is it worth fighting about? If, it is I WILL DO WHAT I WANT.

Four thousand in traveling cost? Assuming it is a couple, where could the wedding be?

Outer Mongolia? It is a destination wedding.

[JMintzer]

Outer Mongolia? It is a destination wedding.

Read the thread. He already explained that it was flights to NY, hotels, etc...

He also explained that it was $3000, and that the other number was a typo...

[Mleechu333@gmail.com]

Approximately $3999 ?
I close loved one is one consideration, otherwise I fill in the check at the reception. Minimum, of course , is the cost of the plate.

The minimum of the plate was my mother's thinking many years ago. I agree somewhat. The bottom line is how close you are to the couple and what one can comfortably afford. The gift should come from the heart. Not sure how many families would really consider the amount of one's gift as too important.

[juneroses]

How do you handle gift amounts to nieces/nephews in the same family? We've had two nieces who married within months of each other in 2018. We gave them identical gifts of money. Now, two years later, a sister is marrying. We can certainly increase the gift amount to account for inflation but are hesitant because we don't want any to view the increased amount as favoring one. They are all caring and responsible young adults. Would you match the previous gifts or increase the amount.

[JSR22]

How do you handle gift amounts to nieces/nephews in the same family? We've had two nieces who married within months of each other in 2018. We gave them identical gifts of money. Now, two years later, a sister is marrying. We can certainly increase the gift amount to account for inflation but are hesitant because we don't want any to view the increased amount as favoring one. They are all caring and responsible young adults. Would you match the previous gifts or increase the amount.

I would increase the amount.

[Schaumburger]

I don't have children of my own, so my 3 nieces are like my kids. When niece number 2 got married in July, 2019, I gave her and her husband $500. Plus buying an outfit, shoes and 2 nights in the hotel near the wedding venue. I was just happy my niece found someone who makes her happy.

to the OP, may your niece and her future husband have many years of happiness together. After the past 17 months, we can all use some celebrations of joy in our lives.

[Schaumburger]

How do you handle gift amounts to nieces/nephews in the same family? We've had two nieces who married within months of each other in 2018. We gave them identical gifts of money. Now, two years later, a sister is marrying. We can certainly increase the gift amount to account for inflation but are hesitant because we don't want any to view the increased amount as favoring one. They are all caring and responsible young adults. Would you match the previous gifts or increase the amount.

My niece #2 got married in July 2019. Nothing official yet, but it looks like her older sister (niece #1) may be getting married within the next year. If this does come to pass, I wiill give the same amount of money for the upcoming wedding as I did for the 2019 wedding.

[kathyspear]

Would you match the previous gifts or increase the amount.

I would give the same amount. Increasing it has the potential to cause problems. You never know who is going to notice what.

kathy

[cj1040]

I shop from the registry - many times things are on sale so $150 spent there is worth even more ......

[saratogaman]

I shop from the registry - many times things are on sale so $150 spent there is worth even more ......

And then there the 'gift trollers' -- distant relatives or friends that you never see or hear from who send you an invite & don't expect you to attend but will gladly accept your money.

[retiredguy123]

And then there the 'gift trollers' -- distant relatives or friends that you never see or hear from who send you an invite & don't expect you to attend but will gladly accept your money.
Good luck with that. It wouldn't work with me.