Lady Seeking Friendship

[Penglobal]

As a newbie single lady, I'm just getting my feet wet here in The Villages and have been looking for male companionship. I have tried the normal avenues but the men that I have met appear immature, ALL looking for one thing and some men are viewing me as a "meal card", (male version of a gold-digger).

I'm seeking an unmarried gentlemen in his 60's for companionship, friendship and happy times. BTW - The gentlemen MOST be unmarried. Do you guys have any suggestions? Thanks !

[Two Bills]

Can you cook and clean good?

[Dana1963]

Good Luck you are obviously a smart women.

[davem4616]

IMHO, go network in the right places

You may be too young to remember Connie Francis song "Where the Boys Are"...but you really should consider putting yourself in situations where 'the boys are'

try getting involved in one of the local churches...amazing how many people have a friend that they'd love to connect with someone that they know that's nice

get involved in one of the many clubs that involves something that you're interested in and guys in their 60's would also be interested in / and attending....

get involved as a volunteer in a cause that you believe in, that would be attractive to guys (Habitat for Humanity might be one example)

I used to tell the daughters, if you want to be married to a 'bar fly', go keep going to the bars...if you want to be married to someone that you share interests with, meet them at the Ski Club, at the hiking club, etc.

It's funny...when you're looking hard for something it never seems to show up....but when you're not looking what you seek just seems to show up

good luck...it's not easy, but he's out there and keep your standards high

Oh, there's also single clubs in TV

[manaboutown]

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[New Englander]

Well, I'm single. But I'm looking for a nurse with a purse.

[Ulrickdj]

You may want to try the "Single in the Villages" (SITV) group. I am a newbie to the group. You can find it on Facebook, and you'll need to register there to join. The group has grown to over 2,900 in the last 2 years. They do a lot of events and you can be as active as you like.

[thevillages2013]

As a newbie single lady, I'm just getting my feet wet here in The Villages and have been looking for male companionship. I have tried the normal avenues but the men that I have met appear immature, ALL looking for one thing and some men are viewing me as a "meal card", (male version of a gold-digger).

I'm seeking an unmarried gentlemen in his 60's for companionship, friendship and happy times. BTW - The gentlemen MOST be unmarried. Do you guys have any suggestions? Thanks !
Pictures?

[Rose Ann Vinci Igoe]

As a newbie single lady, I'm just getting my feet wet here in The Villages and have been looking for male companionship. I have tried the normal avenues but the men that I have met appear immature, ALL looking for one thing and some men are viewing me as a "meal card", (male version of a gold-digger).

I'm seeking an unmarried gentlemen in his 60's for companionship, friendship and happy times. BTW - The gentlemen MOST be unmarried. Do you guys have any suggestions? Thanks !
Don't look only for Male friendships but you want male and female friends that is how you enjoy your life. Get involved in an activity you like so you will have things in common. Friendships don't happen over night, they take time to develop. Go to singles dances , and single dance classes and just look to have fun and make all sorts of friends. Men as well as single women, "do look for a comfortable situation". Be selective and just don't try so hard to meet "a gentleman friend"... all will fall into place.. just mix with groups you like the best. Many to choose 3,000, all levels of activities and things to do. Don't forget your neighborhood group, mix there too.

[manaboutown]

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[Penglobal]

Well, I'm single. But I'm looking for a nurse with a purse.

Although your statement is rather frivolous and silly, I have unfortunately met several gentlemen who she a relatively young educated and financially secure lady as an easy target and their primary intention is xxx and a meal card while all I'm looking for is companionship and conversation. All the good guys apparently have been taken.

I met a lovely and younger gentleman at the Bluefin restaurant and within 60 minutes of conversation several drinks and dinner, he was asking me about protection. I immediately picked-up the tab, paid and told him that my protection is leaving by myself.

[manaboutown]

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[retiredguy123]

The OP is asking guys for advice on finding a man. So, to be perfectly honest, my only advice is that, for a woman to advertise upfront that she is not interested in physical intimacy, is a bad idea. That is my two cents, which, on this topic, is probably not even worth two cents.

[manaboutown]

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[Koapaka]

Can you cook and clean good?

FAV saying of a few friends of mine that are now "single and participating" in the dating scene here ,,,"Yeah, thanks but no thanks. I'm not your nurse and I am not your purse."

[Velvet]

Can you cook and clean good?

LOL. Can you?

My teenage daughter used to say to me, “If he can’t cook, no date. I like to eat.”

[manaboutown]

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[Velvet]

I’m sure you’re right, and of course it’s true with guys as well. But sometimes you meet the bus driver….

[manaboutown]

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[EdFNJ]

This thread should be titled: "Looking for love in all the wrong places" Johnny Lee - "Looking For Love in All the Wrong Places" - YouTube (https://youtu.be/hIuryZ8JUJM)

looking for love in all the wrong places - Google Search (https://www.google.com/search?q=looking+for+love+in+all+the+wrong+places&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS887US887&oq=looking+for+love+in+all+the+wrong+places&aqs=chrome..69i57.6505j0j7&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8)

[Topspinmo]

You say the good ones seem to be taken. People in 60’s and onward usually have Been in forever relationship with their companion when they sudden lose them. Some aren’t looking for second love of their life. I myself couldn’t imagine trying to find another lady companion or try to date again at my age.

Now you got the other half that comes with lot baggage, divorced, separated, drinking problems, drug problems mental problems, lazy, and looking for free ride. Good luck in you’re search. Odds are stacked against you IMO.

[Penglobal]

I thank everyone for your suggestions and for clarity, I have found a lot of nice guys here in The Villages, but I am looking for that special one.

[Two Bills]

LOL. Can you?

My teenage daughter used to say to me, “If he can’t cook, no date. I like to eat.”

I was the ugly duckling who won the heart of, and married the swan.
Can't imagine life without her.

[camaguey48]

I thank everyone for your suggestions and for clarity, I have found a lot of nice guys here in The Villages, but I am looking for that special one.
Enjoy every day and one of these days, that person will come along when you are least expecting it. You never know.

[dewilson58]

In my experience women are like buses. You get off one, another comes along.

Lovely. :ohdear:

[DaleDivine]

Although your statement is rather frivolous and silly, I have unfortunately met several gentlemen who she a relatively young educated and financially secure lady as an easy target and their primary intention is xxx and a meal card while all I'm looking for is companionship and conversation. All the good guys apparently have been taken.

I met a lovely and younger gentleman at the Bluefin restaurant and within 60 minutes of conversation several drinks and dinner, he was asking me about protection. I immediately picked-up the tab, paid and told him that my protection is leaving by myself.

Yep, sorrrry but we are all taken.
:ho::welcome:

[Toymeister]

Wow.

Having read the lack of sincerity and maturity of most of the responses here, Im glad I am not in this lady's position. That is female, single, seeking a mature companion, who is not looking for a hook up or nurse with a purse.

[Bay Kid]

Head to one of our many churches and get involved. Better chance to find a good person rather than on this site or a bar.

[thevillages2013]

As a newbie single lady, I'm just getting my feet wet here in The Villages and have been looking for male companionship. I have tried the normal avenues but the men that I have met appear immature, ALL looking for one thing and some men are viewing me as a "meal card", (male version of a gold-digger).

I'm seeking an unmarried gentlemen in his 60's for companionship, friendship and happy times. BTW - The gentlemen MOST be unmarried. Do you guys have any suggestions? Thanks !
Ok this is bothering me a little bit. Are you saying absolutely no hanky panky, just hanging out? Obviously these men you have met are attracted to you. How about next time you go out with a “gentleman “ don’t shower or wear makeup and dress shabbily and see what he’s after then. And don’t show up in your new Mercedes either

[SkBlogW]

As a newbie single lady, I'm just getting my feet wet here in The Villages and have been looking for male companionship. I have tried the normal avenues but the men that I have met appear immature, ALL looking for one thing and some men are viewing me as a "meal card", (male version of a gold-digger).

I'm seeking an unmarried gentlemen in his 60's for companionship, friendship and happy times. BTW - The gentlemen MOST be unmarried. Do you guys have any suggestions? Thanks !

I'm curious, you say the men you meet are viewing you as a "meal card" Let's say you meet a nice guy and go out for dinner. Do you expect him to pay or do you split the tab?

[Get real]

I met a lovely and younger gentleman at the Bluefin restaurant and within 60 minutes of conversation several drinks and dinner, he was asking me about protection. I immediately picked-up the tab, paid and told him that my protection is leaving by myself.

Why wouldn't you want to be friends with someone that worries about your safety?



j/k

[Penglobal]

I'm curious, you say the men you meet are viewing you as a "meal card" Let's say you meet a nice guy and go out for dinner. Do you expect him to pay or do you split the tab?

Hello and I apologize for the confusion. As an avid runner all my life, I have maintained myself and my late husband and working all my life has permitted me to live my life comfortably. Some guys now see me as an "easy" target for supporting them and for a quickie. I'm looking for companionship with a nice, secure man.

[manaboutown]

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[charlieo1126@gmail.com]

3 cheers lady for coming on here as another way of meeting people and 3 jeers for some of the childish answers especially the one about the bus and ridiculing the woman who wants to be friends first , is what I would expect from high school kids. Although it’s not a surprise , I have good social life her and many of the woman I have dated here seem to have many sad tales here of men who went from high school to marriage and then single and back to the same high school socials skills when it came to woman . Grow Up

[Velvet]

I was the ugly duckling who won the heart of, and married the swan.
Can't imagine life without her.

I’m sure she had good reason….

[Velvet]

Why wouldn't you want to be friends with someone that worries about your safety?



j/k

LOL, you mean she should have pulled out her pearl handled hand gun from her purse and reply, “Why yes, I have protection.”? When he asked her if she brought protection.

[jimbomaybe]

Why wouldn't you want to be friends with someone that worries about your safety?



j/k

" I immediately picked-up the tab, paid and told him that my protection is leaving by myself." Great idea Ill have to try that

[stadry]

Although your statement is rather frivolous and silly, I have unfortunately met several gentlemen who she a relatively young educated and financially secure lady as an easy target and their primary intention is xxx and a meal card while all I'm looking for is companionship and conversation. All the good guys apparently have been taken.

I met a lovely and younger gentleman at the Bluefin restaurant and within 60 minutes of conversation several drinks and dinner, he was asking me about protection. I immediately picked-up the tab, paid and told him that my protection is leaving by myself.
might he have been asking if you have a concealed carry permit ?

[golfing eagles]

might he have been asking if you have a concealed carry permit ?

Might have been asking what type of sealant she uses on her grout, but somehow I doubt it:1rotfl::1rotfl::1rotfl:

[manaboutown]

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[Topspinmo]

3 cheers lady for coming on here as another way of meeting people and 3 jeers for some of the childish answers especially the one about the bus and ridiculing the woman who wants to be friends first , is what I would expect from high school kids. Although it’s not a surprise , I have good social life her and many of the woman I have dated here seem to have many sad tales here of men who went from high school to marriage and then single and back to the same high school socials skills when it came to woman . Grow Up

The bus comment was joke.

[charlieo1126@gmail.com]

Oh yes very funny . This is me laughing , can you hear me???? Of course you can’t , because I’m not

[manaboutown]

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[Laker14]

My suggestion, (coming from a happily married man): Don't be in a hurry, and don't be in "search" mode. Engage yourself in the activities you enjoy, and build your social circles around those activities. Sooner, rather than later, you will start meeting people with similar interests. Some will be girl friends, some will be guy friends. Some of your guy friends will be just that, "friends". Some will be guy friends who want to be more than just "friends", and you may or may not want to be more than just friends.

You say two things that seem to me contradictory. One, you say you just want companionship, but in another post you say you want "that special one"... I suggest you start with companionship, and let the second phase find itself. No doubt, along the way you'll find guys who want to move faster than you want to move, if you want to move at all.

In the words of Paul McCartney, "Let it be, let it be, there will be an answer, let it be."
Enjoy the journey. Peace.

[Boomer]

It is obviously a joke and it has been around a very long time. I have heard it both ways - "Men are like buses..."

It causes me to chuckle now and then as I observe dating happenings in real life among singles I know.

"There are plenty of fish in the sea." is an old saying my mother used when I was young and dating. Same concept.

Nope. You know darned good and well that it is not the same concept. AND your mother would agree with me.

Boomer

PS: Gentlemen never go out of style.

[vintageogauge]

If I were single and looking for companionship I would join one of the many singles clubs. I don't know in what village you live but if you are south of 44 there are several singles groups. Also by limiting your search so to speak to men in their 60's you could be missing out on some great guys in their late 50's or early 70's. Even if you don't find the right guys joining the singles groups will give you something to do that is probably a lot of fun going on organized day trips, etc.

[manaboutown]

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[Boomer]

In my experience women are like buses. You get off one, another comes along.



It is obviously a joke and it has been around a very long time. I have heard it both ways - "Men are like buses..."

It causes me to chuckle now and then as I observe dating happenings in real life among singles I know.

"There are plenty of fish in the sea." is an old saying my mother used when I was young and dating. Same concept.



Nope. You know darned good and well that it is not the same concept. AND your mother would agree with me.

Boomer

PS: Gentlemen never go out of style.



The bus and fish adages essentially provide the same analogy in that dating, for both male and female, is like catch and release fishing until you net a keeper. Q.E.D.



Nope. I will not give you quod erat demonstrandum. End of story? Hah! Not even close.

Let’s take a look at what “off” can mean — denotation v. connotation. The word ‘off’ is carrying more with it than simply being a synonym for ‘disembark’ or even a synonym for ‘leave’. . .

Lady Boomer

PS: I am messin’ with you — because you deserve it for this one.

[charlieo1126@gmail.com]

We all know that the bus joke was put there for all the little boys on here to snicker like in school and yes the joke has been around a long time and still comes across stale and a little sordid and has always been used in a most insensitive way by little groups of boys who think it’s funny

[La lamy]

Hello and I apologize for the confusion. As an avid runner all my life, I have maintained myself and my late husband and working all my life has permitted me to live my life comfortably. Some guys now see me as an "easy" target for supporting them and for a quickie. I'm looking for companionship with a nice, secure man.

I'm sorry to hear about your late husband. I have many friends in The Villages who are widows and now remarried to other widowers. I'm not exactly sure what websites they used, but I'm sure it'd be a good avenue for you to seek out, since you'd have some instant common ground. Good luck.

[vintageogauge]

Hello and I apologize for the confusion. As an avid runner all my life, I have maintained myself and my late husband and working all my life has permitted me to live my life comfortably. Some guys now see me as an "easy" target for supporting them and for a quickie. I'm looking for companionship with a nice, secure man.

How does a man see you as an easy target for support? Do you flaunt your wealth? If so, try not being too obvious. You can now forget about finding someone that fits the bill here as you just let everyone know just how comfortable you are so chances are anyone that sends you a PM will be just the type of guy you don't want.

[manaboutown]

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[Velvet]

I always look at the source where it is coming from. “I love you” means something different from a serial killer than say your dad.

[EdFNJ]

Wow.

Having read the lack of sincerity and maturity of most of the responses here, Im glad I am not in this lady's position. That is female, single, seeking a mature companion, who is not looking for a hook up or nurse with a purse. I think the main point is with all the REAL LIVE face to face places to meet people around here, both good places and not so good places plus the REAL "connection" apps available "advertising" on this forum is a bit off and the reposnes she gets should be expected. Seriously, how would you even REALLY know it's a she and not some guy just catfishing ?? What would one expect from a bunch of anonymous old folks sitting in front of their computers. 98% of the other threads here aren't any different. This place ain't The Love Connection that's for sure. :1rotfl:

[charlieo1126@gmail.com]

It comes across as mirthful because it is based upon the reality of dating.all were dying to know on here that his equipment still works

[manaboutown]

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[tvbound]

The primary problem men who date postmenopausal women run across is this. Postmenopausal Atrophic Vaginitis: Symptoms, Treatments and Causes (/health/atrophic-vaginitis#_noHeaderPrefixedContent)

The bus comment was woefully inappropriate, but now this? Really?

[manaboutown]

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[Boomer]

Hey, charlieo1126,

I hope you do not mind if I ask you a question. (I think we know someone needs to do a change of subject.)

I realize this is completely unrelated to the thread topic, but I am curious about something you said somewhere around here.

Am I right that you were a paratrooper? And for a lot of years?

May I ask if you always knew you wanted to be airborne?

The reason I am asking is because I have a theory that people who fly — and jump — are born wanting to do that.

Mr. Boomer jumped out of perfectly good airplanes and helicopters, compliments of Uncle Sam. Now, he flies, but he does not jump out.

He loves everything to do with flying. Always has. And I would never clip his wings, as long as we are able to keep on.

When did you know that you wanted to be up there in the air?

Everyone I have ever asked that question of has told me that they always knew.

I hope I am not being too nosy. But when did you know the sky was calling to you? Was it always?

Thanks for putting up with my question.

Boomer

PS: When I heard the song “Me and the Sky” from the play, Come From Away, I knew I was not the only one who has this theory.

[kathyspear]

Hey, charlieo1126,

When did you know that you wanted to be up there in the air?

Everyone I have ever asked that question of has told me that they always knew.


Interesting question. I can understand people wanting to BE up there but I don't understand why so many people are not AFRAID TO GO up there. Does that make sense? I watched the 7+ minute video of Wm. Shatner after he came down from space this morning where he talks about what an amazing experience it was and how everyone should get to do it. I can understand wanting to be up there, seeing the earth from a distance, etc., but why are people not terrified to actually do it? I would NEVER. I'd be too afraid that the space capsule would blow up, like when that teacher was on board Apollo-whatever in the 80's. Maybe if you are 90 you figure, what the hell, how much time do I have left anyway. But for everyone else ... Why are they not afraid?

My BIL is a pilot. I will ask him your question one of these days.

kathy

[Toymeister]

What would one expect from a bunch of anonymous old folks sitting in front of their computers. 98% of the other threads here aren't any different.

What I expect, and you should expect, is posters have the same decorum that they would have to a stranger that they met on the street. That isn't too much to ask.

[blueash]

The primary problem men who date postmenopausal women run across is this. Postmenopausal Atrophic Vaginitis: Symptoms, Treatments and Causes (https://www.healthline.com/health/atrophic-vaginitis#_noHeaderPrefixedContent)

So on a thread about trying to find a decent man, we find a man about town who views women like buses to be ridden and where a lady's most important attribute is vaginal lubrication. Of course he will tell you he is a lady's man and not a misogynist. Only dates attractive women, although some have needed plastic surgery to make the grade, and while his brain seems not to have an edit button, his "equipment" sort of still works.

At least the OP has been able to cross one name off her list. I have been warned by the moderators not to direct comments at posters. So if I disappear for a while.. you deserve all the derision people have directed at you in the replies, and you might note that not a single person has come to your defense. That would be a clue for most people.

[charlieo1126@gmail.com]

so on a thread about trying to find a decent man, we find a man about town who views women like buses to be ridden and where a lady's most important attribute is vaginal lubrication. Of course he will tell you he is a lady's man and not a misogynist. Only dates attractive women, although some have needed plastic surgery to make the grade, and while his brain seems not to have an edit button, his "equipment" sort of still works.

At least the op has been able to cross one name off her list. I have been warned by the moderators not to direct comments at posters. So if i disappear for a while.. You deserve all the derision people have directed at you in the replies, and you might note that not a single person has come to your defense. That would be a clue for most people. post

[LateBoomer]

As a newbie single lady, I'm just getting my feet wet here in The Villages and have been looking for male companionship. I have tried the normal avenues but the men that I have met appear immature, ALL looking for one thing and some men are viewing me as a "meal card", (male version of a gold-digger).

I'm seeking an unmarried gentlemen in his 60's for companionship, friendship and happy times. BTW - The gentlemen MOST be unmarried. Do you guys have any suggestions? Thanks !

my guess is that single females probably outnumber single males here 4 to 1. Maybe more. and men if they are older, divorced or widowed and over 60 tend to want to go younger, not the same age or older. TV seems to be overwhelmingly couples anyway, and so I think it's gotta be a bit tough to be single here for either gender.

I think your odds are not good. but there are clubs. Tons. Singles events. Tons. get "out there". but keep your expectations reasonable - I mean, what do YOU bring to the table? unless you are perfect, drop-dead gorgeous, and without baggage, I think you have to make some compromises if you want "companionship". when you're over 60, everyone has baggage, and few are gorgeous. Men or women. Adjust your expectations to what this market will bear. I think it would be less frustrating. If I were single, I think I'd move from here. it's just too much of a couples atmosphere to find the density of older singles you'd want to find.

[Boomer]

So on a thread about trying to find a decent man, we find a man about town who views women like buses to be ridden and where a lady's most important attribute is vaginal lubrication. Of course he will tell you he is a lady's man and not a misogynist. Only dates attractive women, although some have needed plastic surgery to make the grade, and while his brain seems not to have an edit button, his "equipment" sort of still works.

At least the OP has been able to cross one name off her list. I have been warned by the moderators not to direct comments at posters. So if I disappear for a while.. you deserve all the derision people have directed at you in the replies, and you might note that not a single person has come to your defense. That would be a clue for most people.


blueash,

You should not be benched.

I was too easy on the porcine-type behavior when I first tried to get my point across. I regret my dance with words. It did not work.

I had stupidly thought I might get an apology to the women here.

Then, yesterday evening when I took another look at the thread, I could not believe that other comment was actually happening.

I wanted to advise him, “Please stop digging. Please apologize for the first mistake and edit that last one out.”

But I did not. (The old high school, teacher in me often hangs on to a positive expectancy quotient and tries to redirect behavior without causing embarrassment to the individual. But, this is not high school — or is it?)

To manaboutown:

That got weird. Although we definitely do not always agree on issues in the news, I never thought you would dig in on crude behavior and then make things worse. The first one was asinine locker room behavior. The “medical” comment was weird and creepy. Maybe there was a cocktail or two involved. I do not know. But please make it go away so I can try to un-see it. Please do damage control. We do not need moderators involved. You have the opportunity to fix it. We’ll see.

Boomer

PS: blueash, there you have it. I was finally direct. If you are benched and I am not, I will sit on that bench beside you anyway.

[charlieo1126@gmail.com]

Hey, charlieo1126,

I hope you do not mind if I ask you a question. (I think we know someone needs to do a change of subject.)

I realize this is completely unrelated to the thread topic, but I am curious about something you said somewhere around here.

Am I right that you were a paratrooper? And for a lot of years?

May I ask if you always knew you wanted to be airborne?

The reason I am asking is because I have a theory that people who fly — and jump — are born wanting to do that.

Mr. Boomer jumped out of perfectly good airplanes and helicopters, compliments of Uncle Sam. Now, he flies, but he does not jump out.

He loves everything to do with flying. Always has. And I would never clip his wings, as long as we are able to keep on.

When did you know that you wanted to be up there in the air?

Everyone I have ever asked that question of has told me that they always knew.

I hope I am not being too nosy. But when did you know the sky was calling to you? Was it always?

Thanks for putting up with my question.

Boomer

PS: When I heard the song “Me and the Sky” from the play, Come From Away, I knew I was not the only one who has this theory. but there was more to it then that , I grew up in very tough neighborhood and got into very bad trouble with rival gang kids it was bad enough that I left the country at 15 and joined the French Foreign Legion , my lack of height 5ft 6 drove much of my decisions in my life , the Legion was elite the legions paratroops were the best and the First Foreign Parachute Battalion was the best of all and after 6 years fighting both in Vietnam in 1954 and then Algeria it was a natural progression to American Army as a para serving with different units both American and Vietnamese paratroopers in Nam and later as a civilian in Vietnam, Cambodia and Laos and another 30 years in most of hot spots in world, paratroops are the elite of every army in the world and I have quick way to sum up life I spent my whole life helping to keep bad governments in power or to put bad rebels into power that way it never made me crazy like the people in power I worked for , FYI I don’t own any guns and don’t see a need either and I believe that people given s chance can change I’m an example

[Boomer]

but there was more to it then that , I grew up in very tough neighborhood and got into very bad trouble with rival gang kids it was bad enough that I left the country at 15 and joined the French Foreign Legion , my lack of height 5ft 6 drove much of my decisions in my life , the Legion was elite the legions paratroops were the best and the First Foreign Parachute Battalion was the best of all and after 6 years fighting both in Vietnam in 1954 and then Algeria it was a natural progression to American Army as a para serving with different units both American and Vietnamese paratroopers in Nam and later as a civilian in Vietnam, Cambodia and Laos and another 30 years in most of hot spots in world, paratroops are the elite of every army in the world and I have quick way to sum up life I spent my whole life helping to keep bad governments in power or to put bad rebels into power that way it never made me crazy like the people in power I worked for , FYI I don’t own any guns and don’t see a need either and I believe that people given s chance can change I’m an example


Thank you for answering my question, charlieo. (I wanted to say that before this thread gets closed — although I hope it can continue. Like so many threads, this one is theater as characters — and character — are revealed.)

You come across in print as an interesting gentleman.

And thank you for coming to the defense of women.

You are obviously a secure male. As an aside, I sometimes tend to picture our anonymous posters through their words. (Such is the life of an English major.). Anyway, I always picture you as a man who owns his tux. :) )

Boomer

[charlieo1126@gmail.com]

my guess is that single females probably outnumber single males here 4 to 1. Maybe more. and men if they are older, divorced or widowed and over 60 tend to want to go younger, not the same age or older. TV seems to be overwhelmingly couples anyway, and so I think it's gotta be a bit tough to be single here for either gender.

I think your odds are not good. but there are clubs. Tons. Singles events. Tons. get "out there". but keep your expectations reasonable - I mean, what do YOU bring to the table? unless you are perfect, drop-dead gorgeous, and without baggage, I think you have to make some compromises if you want "companionship". when you're over 60, everyone has baggage, and few are gorgeous. Men or women. Adjust your expectations to what this market will bear. I think it would be less frustrating. If I were single, I think I'd move from here. it's just too much of a couples atmosphere to find the density of older singles you'd want to find. woman here , I know many woman here who live very independently they date but they are not out looking for mr right all the time if something did happen well so be it , but many love there homes there friends nice cars and not having to answer to anyone , I myself am I very social person but love living alone , solitude when you want it is a very nice thing , especially when your sitting on the lanai with Miles and Coltrane smoking some weed lol

[LateBoomer]

woman here , I know many woman here who live very independently they date but they are not out looking for mr right all the time if something did happen well so be it , but many love there homes there friends nice cars and not having to answer to anyone , I myself am I very social person but love living alone , solitude when you want it is a very nice thing , especially when your sitting on the lanai with Miles and Coltrane smoking some weed lol

i never suggested otherwise. I think it's important that people are up front about what they want and don't want. It will avoid many problems. for either gender.

I think my only point is that TV is a tough place to be an older single woman given what are likely the demographics here and overwhelmingly couples-oriented sort of place.

so if she only wants companionship, say so. If she's uninterested in sex, say so. If she wants the man to pick up all the tabs, say so. if she expects a man to be financially secure (not sure how that plays into this if you are only seeking companionship), say so up front. most problems are solved. I just think the odds are not that great around here from mere observation. I have run into a lot of widows, but not too many single older men. but there are some out there of course.

again, I think a lot of dating issues are solved if people are honest about themselves, honest about what they want and don't want. that being said, people will misrepresent themselves in dating ads. it's the nature of the game. It's gotta be tough out there. I wouldn't want to be. but at these ages, everyone has baggage. Everyone has a past. just be honest!!

[charlieo1126@gmail.com]

Thank you for answering my question, charlieo. (I wanted to say that before this thread gets closed — although I hope it can continue. Like so many threads, this one is theater as characters — and character — are revealed.)

You come across in print as an interesting gentleman.

And thank you for coming to the defense of women.

You are obviously a secure male. As an aside, I sometimes tend to picture our anonymous posters through their words. (Such is the life of an English major.). Anyway, I always picture you as a man who owns his tux. :) )

Boomerbut a closet full of Amani and Hugo Boss and never in shorts at night and I mean never , jeans or slacks and no flip
Flops or sandals just short boots or shoes and that’s the last of my story you get today lol the AC guy is here

[charlieo1126@gmail.com]

i never suggested otherwise. I think it's important that people are up front about what they want and don't want. It will avoid many problems. for either gender.

I think my only point is that TV is a tough place to be an older single woman given what are likely the demographics here and overwhelmingly couples-oriented sort of place.

so if she only wants companionship, say so. If she's uninterested in sex, say so. If she wants the man to pick up all the tabs, say so. if she expects a man to be financially secure (not sure how that plays into this if you are only seeking companionship), say so up front. most problems are solved. I just think the odds are not that great around here from mere observation. I have run into a lot of widows, but not too many single older men. but there are some out there of course.

again, I think a lot of dating issues are solved if people are honest about themselves, honest about what they want and don't want. that being said, people will misrepresent themselves in dating ads. it's the nature of the game. It's gotta be tough out there. I wouldn't want to be. but at these ages, everyone has baggage. Everyone has a past. just be honest!!
Your post in a negative way I just meant there are many comfortable singles of both sexes here

[LateBoomer]

Your post in a negative way I just meant there are many comfortable singles of both sexes here

I have no doubt that there are.

but the OP isn't apparently one of them. which is the basis of my responses. if people are thrilled being alone, more power to them! I just think it's gotta be hard in TV for those that are looking for marriage again, that's all. either gender. chill. nobody is doubting your happiness. I promise.

[Velvet]

woman here , I know many woman here who live very independently they date but they are not out looking for mr right all the time if something did happen well so be it , but many love there homes there friends nice cars and not having to answer to anyone , I myself am I very social person but love living alone , solitude when you want it is a very nice thing , especially when your sitting on the lanai with Miles and Coltrane smoking some weed lol

For some reason, I guessed your gender correctly. You just sound like you are a strong happy female to me.

I guess it hurts us, any one of us, who feels put down. We all look for that sense of validation. It is best if it can come from inside of one self and not from others.

[D.Bolen]

As a newbie single lady, I'm just getting my feet wet here in The Villages and have been looking for male companionship. . . . . Do you guys have any suggestions? Thanks !

Penglobal, if there's a chance any TOTV participants might fit the bill, you might try adding a flattering photo (but one that accurately represents your appearance at your present age) to a new profile for yourself, and then participating in TOTV discussions on topics that interest you.

I think you would find that any men who are intrigued by your comments and appearance will begin to respond to your posts, which may open the way for private messages between the two of you, and who knows . . . ? I'm sure you have seen that some ladies and gents on this site do have their photos attached, so yours would not stick out like a sore thumb.

If you choose to do that, however, unless you want your photos showing up on this current thread, you would want to cease membership as "Penglobal" and create a new name and profile. If you posted a photo to your present profile, I believe it would now attach itself to all your previous posts, including those on this thread. If you would not mind that, just add your photo to your current profile.

[charlieo1126@gmail.com]

I suspect from some first hand knowledge and just speculation that many of the marriages here come from the need for financial security for both sexes and more so for men , many here are used to 2 incomes the loss whether divorce or death can cause problems , 2 can live better then one here and I also can see that the more financially secure a person is the more chance they will be comfortable single and again there are lots of single woman and men here and many other places that are very happy

[charlieo1126@gmail.com]

For some reason, I guessed your gender correctly. You just sound like you are a strong happy female to me.

I guess it hurts us, any one of us, who feels put down. We all look for that sense of validation. It is best if it can come from inside of one self and not from others.
Have you been smoking some of my weed lol

[Boomer]

i never suggested otherwise. I think it's important that people are up front about what they want and don't want. It will avoid many problems. for either gender.

I think my only point is that TV is a tough place to be an older single woman given what are likely the demographics here and overwhelmingly couples-oriented sort of place.

so if she only wants companionship, say so. If she's uninterested in sex, say so. If she wants the man to pick up all the tabs, say so. if she expects a man to be financially secure (not sure how that plays into this if you are only seeking companionship), say so up front. most problems are solved. I just think the odds are not that great around here from mere observation. I have run into a lot of widows, but not too many single older men. but there are some out there of course.

again, I think a lot of dating issues are solved if people are honest about themselves, honest about what they want and don't want. that being said, people will misrepresent themselves in dating ads. it's the nature of the game. It's gotta be tough out there. I wouldn't want to be. but at these ages, everyone has baggage. Everyone has a past. just be honest!!


LateBoomer,

I have been happily married for decades so I do not know if I have any business advising on this one. But, that has never stopped me before. . .

I will give the same advice to our OP here that I gave my daughter and my granddaughter — and a few others along the way. . .

That advice? Never settle.

I have even given that advice to perfect strangers. . .

For instance:

One snowy evening in Cincinnati, Mr. Boomer and I went out to dinner. The snow kept on.

The restaurant was one of those places that had people at the door, and in this case, it was two young women who opened the double doors and said thank you and bid the customers a nice goodbye.

What they observed was that as I was there waiting, a car pulled up. A wonderful man got out. It was snowing hard. He had an umbrella. He walked to the door. Popped the umbrella up over me. Took my arm to escort me through the heavy snow.

As I said goodbye to the two young women, one of them asked, “How do you get that?”

To which, I smiled (I have been told I have a “knowing smile”) and answered, “Never settle.”

Early Boomer

[charlieo1126@gmail.com]

Mr boomer is a great guy and your words are short but very meaningful

[bilcon]

Good Luck! Watch out for the Hound Dogs, and be very careful who you give your personal information to. I am sure there are plenty of nice guys.

[D.Bolen]

[Sorry Velvet I'm a man]/Have you been smoking some of my weed lol

Seeing this lessened my confusion (after reading Charlieo's post regarding his background and Mrs. Boomer's curiosity regarding his appearance had conjured up images akin to the actor Charles Bronson in my head).

[golfing eagles]

So on a thread about trying to find a decent man, we find a man about town who views women like buses to be ridden and where a lady's most important attribute is vaginal lubrication. Of course he will tell you he is a lady's man and not a misogynist. Only dates attractive women, although some have needed plastic surgery to make the grade, and while his brain seems not to have an edit button, his "equipment" sort of still works.

At least the OP has been able to cross one name off her list. I have been warned by the moderators not to direct comments at posters. So if I disappear for a while.. you deserve all the derision people have directed at you in the replies, and you might note that not a single person has come to your defense. That would be a clue for most people.

Give him a break----maybe he's a Premarin salesman :1rotfl::1rotfl::1rotfl:

[Velvet]

Have you been smoking some of my weed lol

My apologies, sir, you say a lot of things I would have so I just assumed you were another me… but I’m definitely a female… :)

[charlieo1126@gmail.com]

Seeing this lessened my confusion (after reading Charlieo's post regarding his background and Mrs. Boomer's curiosity regarding his appearance had conjured up images akin to the actor Charles Bronson in my head). 135 lbs but just as strong lol and I always feel bigger

[EdFNJ]

What I expect, and you should expect, is posters have the same decorum that they would have to a stranger that they met on the street. That isn't too much to ask. Ummmmm, this is THE INTERNET. THE WEB. AN ANONYMOUS FORUM with people hiding behind fake personnas with silly avatars. VERY SADLY, the reponses received are exactly what one would expect in these places. Have any family in middle school? Ask them what their "forum" (facebook, instagram etc) is like. Kind of like saying that if you hang out in a sex club you'll meet nice church or temple going people you can bring home to family. Now if this conversation were held FACE TO FACE in a restaurant, local club, church etc or even on the street I would agree with you 100%. Look up CATFISHING just for one suggestion to get you started. If anyone expects anything different from places like this they need to do some internet research. Sorry, you expectations don't match reality.

[CoachKandSportsguy]

Obviously, this is a very, very hot topic. . . amazed at some of the responses from certain names. . . . . For those into reading about the men / women real life sexual/mating/partner dance, there is a non fiction book about seduction called "The Game", written by a NYT writer as an assignment (I read it over 10 years ago, so might be the wrong paper) , which describes the push pull sub conscious techniques men and women use as part of the sexual dance.

Since reading the book, I saw the events happen to me in real time, and was like wow! there is alot to the sexual dance from a psychological point of view . .. . especially in the prime of our lives (but the same will happen in retirement).

The book is written from the point of a man, but both sexes play specific roles, and the main protaganist, named "Mystery" describes, and explains the dance, as well as how to short circuit the dance. .. all about psychology . . . .

very well worth the read, and the lesson to take away is to be worthy first, be the best you can be, ie, not a slob and not a misogynist, etc, but don't hate the player, hate the game. . .

good luck

[Velvet]

My observation; all happy couples seem to play the same way, and the unhappy are unhappy in their own way. Nothing wrong with a game where you both win.

[Taltarzac725]

I hope you find your soul mate so to speak.

[Bonanza]

After thinking about the OP's original post for a few days, I find it becoming more and more strange. I've been wondering to myself why she has thrown her situation out to the public -- here on a public forum, although she is totally anonymous.

If she is on this website she has, at least, a smattering of knowledge regarding the Internet. I question why she has not gotten herself on a few of the senior websites where she can state whatever she wants about herself and exactly what she is seeking. What she would do with responders and how she would answer them is no different than what she would do anyway -- there, here on this site or wherever.

Logic also tells me and anyone with one iota of sense that to meet anyone in a new community, you have to make yourself available and join clubs, groups, the pool, the squares for evening entertainment, etc. The avenues for meeting people in this area are endless.

So I ask myself . . . What is the OP's post really about?
Yes -- I find it all very strange.

[CoachKandSportsguy]

I thank everyone for your suggestions and for clarity, I have found a lot of nice guys here in The Villages, but I am looking for that special one.

You have to kiss alot of frogs before you find a prince. . . but a watched pot never boils. .

so there is the perfect historical advice which always applies. . unless he lives over the bridge . . .

:duck:

[Taltarzac725]

As a newbie single lady, I'm just getting my feet wet here in The Villages and have been looking for male companionship. I have tried the normal avenues but the men that I have met appear immature, ALL looking for one thing and some men are viewing me as a "meal card", (male version of a gold-digger).

I'm seeking an unmarried gentlemen in his 60's for companionship, friendship and happy times. BTW - The gentlemen MOST be unmarried. Do you guys have any suggestions? Thanks !

That takes a lot of guts to start a thread like this on Talk of the Villages probably well knowing what kind of responses you will get if you have read TOTV for a while.

[charlieo1126@gmail.com]

After thinking about the OP's original post for a few days, I find it becoming more and more strange. I've been wondering to myself why she has thrown her situation out to the public -- here on a public forum, although she is totally anonymous.

If she is on this website she has, at least, a smattering of knowledge regarding the Internet. I question why she has not gotten herself on a few of the senior websites where she can state whatever she wants about herself and exactly what she is seeking. What she would do with responders and how she would answer them is no different than what she would do anyway -- there, here on this site or wherever.

Logic also tells me and anyone with one iota of sense that to meet anyone in a new community, you have to make yourself available and join clubs, groups, the pool, the squares for evening entertainment, etc. The avenues for meeting people in this area are endless.

So I ask myself . . . What is the OP's post really about?
Yes -- I find it all very strange. it was another avenue of meeting people and just maybe some nice men PM her and if she gets one nice friend from this it will be worth having to read some pretty awful posts along with the nice ones

[PugMom]

LOL, you mean she should have pulled out her pearl handled hand gun from her purse and reply, “Why yes, I have protection.”? When he asked her if she brought protection.

that was my 1st thought, LOL

[PugMom]

How does a man see you as an easy target for support? Do you flaunt your wealth? If so, try not being too obvious. You can now forget about finding someone that fits the bill here as you just let everyone know just how comfortable you are so chances are anyone that sends you a PM will be just the type of guy you don't want.

you shared the best advice yet--be yourself, & don't 'show' wealth. i found my hubby through the want ads, lol, long before the age of the pc. i let him do all or most of the talking & learned what i needed to know. final thought: your mate will come along when least expected, best of luck to ye~! :)

[New Englander]

///

[ROCKMUP]

The OP is asking guys for advice on finding a man. So, to be perfectly honest, my only advice is that, for a woman to advertise upfront that she is not interested in physical intimacy, is a bad idea. That is my two cents, which, on this topic, is probably not even worth two cents.

At least she's honest up front and got that out of the way. Not my cup of tea but she will be for someone

[Bonanza]

Originally Posted by retiredguy123 View Post
The OP is asking guys for advice on finding a man. So, to be perfectly honest, my only advice is that, for a woman to advertise upfront that she is not interested in physical intimacy, is a bad idea. That is my two cents, which, on this topic, is probably not even worth two cents.

*******

At least she's honest up front and got that out of the way. Not my cup of tea but she will be for someone

Hmmmm . . . Well, uhhhh. Oh, never mind! :shocked:

[Taltarzac725]

She is asking anyone on here as there are many women users of Talk of the Villages. I have had a few of them come up to me and ask me if I was "Tal". These were ladies I never saw before and the two I am thinking if had been in Minnesota for work.

I have also ran across many people who have lived in, worked or, at least, visited Reno, Nevada or near there like at the Air Force Base at Stead, Nevada.

And she seems to be saying she is looking for something meaningful more than just a hook-up.


Originally Posted by retiredguy123 View Post
The OP is asking guys for advice on finding a man. So, to be perfectly honest, my only advice is that, for a woman to advertise upfront that she is not interested in physical intimacy, is a bad idea. That is my two cents, which, on this topic, is probably not even worth two cents.

*******



Hmmmm . . . Well, uhhhh. Oh, never mind! :shocked:

[asianthree]

After thinking about the OP's original post for a few days, I find it becoming more and more strange. I've been wondering to myself why she has thrown her situation out to the public -- here on a public forum, although she is totally anonymous.

If she is on this website she has, at least, a smattering of knowledge regarding the Internet. I question why she has not gotten herself on a few of the senior websites where she can state whatever she wants about herself and exactly what she is seeking. What she would do with responders and how she would answer them is no different than what she would do anyway -- there, here on this site or wherever.

Logic also tells me and anyone with one iota of sense that to meet anyone in a new community, you have to make yourself available and join clubs, groups, the pool, the squares for evening entertainment, etc. The avenues for meeting people in this area are endless.

So I ask myself . . . What is the OP's post really about?
Yes -- I find it all very strange.

Well if you are interested one can PM the OP, then all your questions and concerns could be answered.

Many new people have met using this forum, for years. Some to start a new club, some looking for a workout buddy, and some for just friendship.

One can have a deep personal friendship without any intimacy. Happens everyday, my best friend for over 30 years is gay, I can’t think of a time when they weren’t by my side in my sadness or my happiness moments

[Bonanza]

Well if you are interested one can PM the OP, then all your questions and concerns could be answered.

Many new people have met using this forum, for years. Some to start a new club, some looking for a workout buddy, and some for just friendship.

One can have a deep personal friendship without any intimacy. Happens everyday, my best friend for over 30 years is gay, I can’t think of a time when they weren’t by my side in my sadness or my happiness moments

I did not say I was "interested," and certainly not interested enough to send the OP a PM. All I said was that I found her post "strange." Any question on my part was rhetorical (refer to my comment, "So I ask myself . . ."). "Concerns?" I didn't have any.

"Many new people have met using this forum?" Some perhaps, but that was not anything I mentioned. I also did not mention anything about intimacy or a homosexual relationship either. If you garnered up any of those things from reading my comment, then the onus is on you because none of those things even entered my thought process or were part of it, and certainly were not part of the written word.