View Full Version : Question for Parents and Grandparents Living in TV
Michael G.
04-27-2022, 03:54 PM
My wife and I have one adopted son with our daughter-in-law living close by here in Florida. Our son and wife treat my wife and I wonderful in so many ways to mention.
The four of us travel a lot, play cards, and spent a lot of time together.
Wife and I where never blessed with grandchildren and wondered about people here in Florida that just pulled up stakes and left their sons, daughters and young grandchildren some were miles out of state.
Do you feel a void part of your life by missing them dearly and being part of their lives?
Do you wish you lived closer to enjoy them besides a occasional phone call or visit?
From Happy Parents
Cheers!
Garywt
04-27-2022, 04:51 PM
I am not sure I will ever be 100% down here. Grandchildren is one reason as one lives with us so can’t sell the house. We also camp most of the summer in New England. Our 3 kids will camp as well as everyone has a trailer.
Stu from NYC
04-27-2022, 04:53 PM
My wife and I have one adopted son with our daughter-in-law living close by here in Florida. Our son and wife treat my wife and I wonderful in so many ways to mention.
The four of us travel a lot, play cards, and spent a lot of time together.
Wife and I where never blessed with grandchildren and wondered about people here in Florida that just pulled up stakes and left their sons, daughters and young grandchildren some were miles out of state.
Do you feel a void part of your life by missing them dearly and being part of their lives?
Do you wish you lived closer to enjoy them besides a occasional phone call or visit?
From Happy Parents
Cheers!
yes
NotGolfer
04-27-2022, 05:27 PM
Our kids were living LIFE and had to make time for us before we moved here. They lived a distance away and we had to share them with their inlaws for some of the holidays. For instance---this T.G. and Christmas they go to the other side----then "maybe" the next year it would be our turn. They work during the week so---well you can figure that out. We have two grown grandchildren, no littles---they were teens when we moved here so had grown into jobs, friends, activities that took up their time. When we'd visit they "might" breeze in between events to greet us then would be on their way. We figured we can visit when the weather turns nice up there (NOT going in winter). Covid hit and there was A LOT of rules. We had no trouble coming down here so are thankful we made the decision. IF our kids decided on a "LIFE-change" as we have---they'd go ahead and do it without wondering about "what will mom and dad think?"
Michael G.
04-27-2022, 05:38 PM
We have two grown grandchildren, no littles---they were teens when we moved here so had grown into jobs, friends, activities that took up their time. When we'd visit they "might" breeze in between events to greet us then would be on their way.
Yes it's a changing world out there for close family relationships.
My neighbor 8 yr.'s grandson was going to visit them when school was out.
He call for days and told his grandpa how he couldn't wait to visit for a week in Florida.
The day finally came, grandparents went to Orlando airport to pick him up.
Two days later he just sat stayed at his cell phone, was bored and homesick.
rustyp
04-27-2022, 05:47 PM
My wife and I have one adopted son with our daughter-in-law living close by here in Florida. Our son and wife treat my wife and I wonderful in so many ways to mention.
The four of us travel a lot, play cards, and spent a lot of time together.
Wife and I where never blessed with grandchildren and wondered about people here in Florida that just pulled up stakes and left their sons, daughters and young grandchildren some were miles out of state.
Do you feel a void part of your life by missing them dearly and being part of their lives?
Do you wish you lived closer to enjoy them besides a occasional phone call or visit?
From Happy Parents
Cheers!
Mr happy parent - why would you ask this question if you're happy ?
Madelaine Amee
04-27-2022, 05:52 PM
Our kids were living LIFE and had to make time for us before we moved here. They lived a distance away and we had to share them with their inlaws for some of the holidays. For instance---this T.G. and Christmas they go to the other side----then "maybe" the next year it would be our turn. They work during the week so---well you can figure that out. We have two grown grandchildren, no littles---they were teens when we moved here so had grown into jobs, friends, activities that took up their time. When we'd visit they "might" breeze in between events to greet us then would be on their way. We figured we can visit when the weather turns nice up there (NOT going in winter). Covid hit and there was A LOT of rules. We had no trouble coming down here so are thankful we made the decision. IF our kids decided on a "LIFE-change" as we have---they'd go ahead and do it without wondering about "what will mom and dad think?"
This is an excellent explanation for many.
Michael G.
04-27-2022, 06:01 PM
Mr happy parent - why would you ask this question if you're happy ?
Y-e-a-h Maybe, just maybe to find out how other parents and Grandparents feel
This is one dam stupid question.
RVJim
04-27-2022, 06:14 PM
I think you will find all manner of relationships between grandparents/parents here in TV. My children/grandchildren all live very close to we are in constant contact and see them often. Other parents/grandparents have less close relationships with their offspring and only see them once a year or once every few years. I also now of at least one grandparent in TV that has children and grandchildren but for whatever reason has no contact with them.
It think you will find a full spectrum of connection for parents and children. Everything from they live close and we see them every day to not on speaking terms.
dewilson58
04-27-2022, 06:25 PM
Mr happy parent - why would you ask this question if you're happy ?
Mr. Rust, got'a agree with you.
Why ask a bunch of strangers on a social media board.
We know why.
:ho:
Bogie Shooter
04-27-2022, 06:27 PM
Y-e-a-h Maybe, just maybe to find out how other parents and Grandparents feel
This is one dam stupid question.
Little crusty there……..
Michael G.
04-27-2022, 06:30 PM
Little crusty there……..
Like the question
rustyp
04-27-2022, 06:41 PM
Mr. Rust, got'a agree with you.
Why ask a punch of strangers on a social media board.
We know why.
:ho:
Off the top of my head could it possibly be flaunting or trolling ?
dewilson58
04-27-2022, 07:02 PM
Little crusty there……..
Crusty & defensive.
Got called on the carpet for what it is.
:posting:
me4vt
04-28-2022, 04:42 AM
My wife and I have one adopted son with our daughter-in-law living close by here in Florida. Our son and wife treat my wife and I wonderful in so many ways to mention.
The four of us travel a lot, play cards, and spent a lot of time together.
Wife and I where never blessed with grandchildren and wondered about people here in Florida that just pulled up stakes and left their sons, daughters and young grandchildren some were miles out of state.
Do you feel a void part of your life by missing them dearly and being part of their lives?
Do you wish you lived closer to enjoy them besides a occasional phone call or visit?
From Happy Parents
Cheers!
This isn’t Ann Landers!!
La lamy
04-28-2022, 04:49 AM
Such a thoughtful question from a well adjusted family person, yet "grumpy old..." have to make snarky unnecessary comments. :ohdear: I just want to remind people that you can "IGNORE" people who typically leave rude comments, by going to "USER SETTINGS" at top of page (write out the person's name before so you'll remember, or copy and paste). On the left of the page there is a SETTINGS & OPTIONS paragraph, click on Edit Ignore List. Type in the person you want to Ignore, press OKAY and Poof, no more unnecessary grump on your feed. Very useful tool for those of us who try to avoid debbie downers. Have a great day everybody!
:ho:
Nick B
04-28-2022, 05:15 AM
My wife and I have one adopted son with our daughter-in-law living close by here in Florida. Our son and wife treat my wife and I wonderful in so many ways to mention.
The four of us travel a lot, play cards, and spent a lot of time together.
Wife and I where never blessed with grandchildren and wondered about people here in Florida that just pulled up stakes and left their sons, daughters and young grandchildren some were miles out of state.
Do you feel a void part of your life by missing them dearly and being part of their lives?
Do you wish you lived closer to enjoy them besides a occasional phone call or visit?
From Happy Parents
Cheers!
Most left to get out of grandparenting. The ME GENERATION
maggie1
04-28-2022, 05:22 AM
Such a thoughtful question from a well adjusted family person, yet "grumpy old..." have to make snarky unnecessary comments. :ohdear: I just want to remind people that you can "IGNORE" people who typically leave rude comments, by going to "USER SETTINGS" at top of page (write out the person's name before so you'll remember, or copy and paste). On the left of the page there is a SETTINGS & OPTIONS paragraph, click on Edit Ignore List. Type in the person you want to Ignore, press OKAY and Poof, no more unnecessary grump on your feed. Very useful tool for those of us who try to avoid debbie downers. Have a great day everybody!
:ho:
I totally agree. It seems the same people never have a good thing to say about others that post questions. Are the posts what they call "trolling", or simply a legitimate inquiry? Who cares what the objective is, it certainly doesn't deserve the negative responses that we see from the same people again, and again, and again. The old axiom of "If you can't say something nice, then don't say anything" pretty much rings true on TOTV. Now, I'll set back and wait for the negative Nellies to respond to this, and then I'll follow the instructions on how to officially and permanently IGNORE them.
banjobob
04-28-2022, 05:30 AM
I think that answer probably is true of most ,unless grandma is still “raising the grands” as in being involved in their lives daily and MUST go back to be with them. Sure I enjoy my grands and great grands and great great grands but they certainly don’t want me involved in their lives regularly .Grandparents are the past .
Luggage
04-28-2022, 05:49 AM
3 kids, west coast, Ohio and Utah. my wife's brothers and sisters all move down here after we did but my sister and brothers have not. We are lucky that God invented airplanes, the internet, the telephone and zoom meetings. The only thing I really miss are New York City bagels and pizza and real Chinese food
thevillages2013
04-28-2022, 06:00 AM
I think that answer probably is true of most ,unless grandma is still “raising the grands” as in being involved in their lives daily and MUST go back to be with them. Sure I enjoy my grands and great grands and great great grands but they certainly don’t want me involved in their lives regularly .Grandparents are the past .
Don’t leave us with the babies!
thelegges
04-28-2022, 06:17 AM
I can’t imagine our children wanting us to put our life off for their children. All were happy we chose to move to a warm climate away from the snow, and the burden of worry for them, every time, the snow and freezing rain hit our north home.
Now children and grands, only worry about how long of a wait for Rise of the Resistance :clap2:
ThirdOfFive
04-28-2022, 06:22 AM
My wife and I have one adopted son with our daughter-in-law living close by here in Florida. Our son and wife treat my wife and I wonderful in so many ways to mention.
The four of us travel a lot, play cards, and spent a lot of time together.
Wife and I where never blessed with grandchildren and wondered about people here in Florida that just pulled up stakes and left their sons, daughters and young grandchildren some were miles out of state.
Do you feel a void part of your life by missing them dearly and being part of their lives?
Do you wish you lived closer to enjoy them besides a occasional phone call or visit?
From Happy Parents
Cheers!
I recall feeling some trepidation about that particular subject before moving here. Minnesota and Florida are miles apart in just about very respect. But no problem! My wife predicted that we'd be seeing our families on a pretty regular basis. She was right. We've had more relatives visiting us here than we ever have had in Minnesota.
oldtimes
04-28-2022, 06:23 AM
My wife and I have one adopted son with our daughter-in-law living close by here in Florida. Our son and wife treat my wife and I wonderful in so many ways to mention.
The four of us travel a lot, play cards, and spent a lot of time together.
Wife and I where never blessed with grandchildren and wondered about people here in Florida that just pulled up stakes and left their sons, daughters and young grandchildren some were miles out of state.
Do you feel a void part of your life by missing them dearly and being part of their lives?
Do you wish you lived closer to enjoy them besides a occasional phone call or visit?
From Happy Parents
Cheers!
Some of us have children who moved away to different parts of the country. We could not have moved around to all of the places that they have been. We visit them and they visit us whenever possible.
Glowfromminnesota
04-28-2022, 06:39 AM
I can answer a little differently. When I was 12 years old my parents retired to Florida leaving behind my much older siblings, nieces, nephews, close cousins, etc. I felt like an only child leaving behind a full big Italian/Greek family in New York moving to Florida. It started out great, summers in New York, Holidays, etc. As the years went by we saw my family less and less. Although some of my family followed my parents to Florida, many did not. Today—fast forward 50 years—I don’t know many of my nieces and nephews or great nieces and nephews. Then when my parents passed away, it was also a game changer. If you make an effort to stay connected and close, it helps. But life happens and we all go in different directions. I often wondered how things would have turned out if my parents didn’t leave New York. But they needed to live their own lives too….
NJDiane
04-28-2022, 06:39 AM
We are from NJ and both of our sons relocated after they graduated from college. Family is the most important thing to us and eventually we moved to Florida, where one of my sons live, together with my daughter-in-law and now two grandsons. We have a wonderful bond with the kids, especially since we babysit a lot. My other son, with my daughter-in-law and granddaughter live in Maryland, so that’s very difficult, not being able to see them as often. If both kids lived in the same state, it would be a no-brainer, but unfortunately for us, but good for them, they left because they both got the job offers they wanted. We are all together whenever we can!
Petersweeney
04-28-2022, 06:40 AM
3 kids, west coast, Ohio and Utah. my wife's brothers and sisters all move down here after we did but my sister and brothers have not. We are lucky that God invented airplanes, the internet, the telephone and zoom meetings. The only thing I really miss are New York City bagels and pizza and real Chinese's food
You can get MSG on the internet…
chuckpedrey
04-28-2022, 06:43 AM
We have 7 grandchildren living in south Florida. It’s a blessing to be close enough to have them visit The Villages and for us to be able to drive to their homes down the turnpike. Sometimes we watch the kids and the parents get a weekend away by themselves.
SandyPd56
04-28-2022, 06:49 AM
I moved to Florida 6 years ago after getting divorced. I met a wonderful person who asked me to move here. I have two grown children and two grandchildren who I left behind in NE. I miss them all very much but I'm fortunate enough to be able to go home and visit with them several times a year. I also face time with my daughter every week and talk to the grandchildren. It gets easier with the passing of time but you don't stop missing them.
airstreamingypsy
04-28-2022, 06:57 AM
Such a thoughtful question from a well adjusted family person, yet "grumpy old..." have to make snarky unnecessary comments. :ohdear: I just want to remind people that you can "IGNORE" people who typically leave rude comments, by going to "USER SETTINGS" at top of page (write out the person's name before so you'll remember, or copy and paste). On the left of the page there is a SETTINGS & OPTIONS paragraph, click on Edit Ignore List. Type in the person you want to Ignore, press OKAY and Poof, no more unnecessary grump on your feed. Very useful tool for those of us who try to avoid debbie downers. Have a great day everybody!
:ho:
Thank you, I didn't know that. I don't understand why people from the "friendliest hometown" are so snarky. I couldn't find anything in the OP that deserved a snark.
Stu from NYC
04-28-2022, 07:10 AM
The hardest thing of living here is we do not see our kids and grandkids nearly as much as we used to. Than again covid sure has not helped
ddawson922
04-28-2022, 07:14 AM
My 4 sons visit a lot. My oldest already bought a Villa to rent. My youngest comes a least 5-6 times a year spending several weeks with my 3 year old grandson. On occasion I fly home to see them, but I still enjoy everything the villages has to offer. I love it here.
rustyp
04-28-2022, 07:22 AM
Dear Ann:
‘My son and his wife split up when my grandchild was three. They went to court and everything was fine for ten years.
He had an order and would see her at weekends. Suddenly, she couldn’t come to see her father anymore, we were told she was “busy” and then she was bought a puppy and we were told she “couldn’t leave the puppy”
‘For two years, there’s been no contact. She’s nearly 15 now and she was nearly 13 when we last saw her. We’ve been back to court to try and gain access but the judge said she’s old enough to make her own decisions on whether she wants to see us.
‘We understand that she’s growing up and things would change but we send cards, we send presents, we send money and we don’t get anything back. There’s no contact at all.
My question - do we have a legal right to puppy visitation ?
Signed
Forlorned in Leisureville
Gulfcoast
04-28-2022, 07:54 AM
We're not in TV, yet, nor do we have grandchildren, yet. Our kids are young adults (college age) and I don't anticipate them having children of their own for quite awhile. So, for us, we'll be moving to TV around the time that our kids will be leaving the nest to pursue their own careers. We'll likely have been living in TV for years before the first grandchild comes along. It's also possible that our kids will decide to settle down someplace nearby TV. That will be their choice to make and I'll be good with whatever they decide to do.
DonnaNi4os
04-28-2022, 08:15 AM
My wife and I have one adopted son with our daughter-in-law living close by here in Florida. Our son and wife treat my wife and I wonderful in so many ways to mention.
The four of us travel a lot, play cards, and spent a lot of time together.
Wife and I where never blessed with grandchildren and wondered about people here in Florida that just pulled up stakes and left their sons, daughters and young grandchildren some were miles out of state.
Do you feel a void part of your life by missing them dearly and being part of their lives?
Do you wish you lived closer to enjoy them besides a occasional phone call or visit?
From Happy Parents
Cheers!
It sounds like you have the best of both worlds. As I began plans to leave NJ and begin my life here I thought about it a lot. I raised 4 kids on my own after being widowed early, so perhaps it was time for me? I would be leaving them and my 8 grandkids behind. Although, my oldest daughter had moved to TX with her 2 kids a few years before. It occurred to me that any of my kids might be required to move out of state for the same reason. Despite being within 15 minutes of my other 3 kids and 6 grands, I didn’t see them often except for one of them. Sure we had holidays together and then there was the babysitting duties that I cherished….well, maybe not always. Add on top of this the fact that living in NJ is extremely costly, I made the decision to move. My daughter asked me why I wanted to leave and I responded that I felt like I was sitting around waiting to die. Her response was “then I want you to go”. Since moving here my TX daughter has moved to Orlando and my son bought a home in Naples. Do I wish we were all together, yes I do. But that is life in the 21st century. We are a mobile society and have the ability to FaceTime anytime we want and I cherish the moments when my phone rings and my 11 year old grandson’s face appears and he talks for half an hour. I also cherish the visits to NJ and theirs to FL. That’s my sincere answer to your question.
tophcfa
04-28-2022, 08:19 AM
Ergggggggg, you hit a sore spot. The wife can’t let go of seeing the kids/grandkids for every dam birthday or holiday. The kids are the biggest “we can’t because” keeping us (me) from enjoying the golden years on our schedule. There seems to be a friggin birthday for one of the kids every month of the year. It’s becoming a pain in the butt and getting very expensive to travel back and forth between our homes. Every birthday means another month we can’t be enjoying our Villages home so we can spend three hours being ignored by the kid until the minute it takes him/ her to open the presents we brought. Why can’t seeing all the kids a couple times a year at a family outing be enough??????
Michael G.
04-28-2022, 08:23 AM
Such a thoughtful question from a well adjusted family person, yet "grumpy old..." have to make snarky unnecessary comments. :ohdear: I just want to remind people that you can "IGNORE" people who typically leave rude comments, by going to "USER SETTINGS" at top of page (write out the person's name before so you'll remember, or copy and paste). On the left of the page there is a SETTINGS & OPTIONS paragraph, click on Edit Ignore List. Type in the person you want to Ignore, press OKAY and Poof, no more unnecessary grump on your feed. Very useful tool for those of us who try to avoid debbie downers. Have a great day everybody!
:ho:
https://www.talkofthevillages.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=93532&stc=1&d=1651152137
DaleDivine
04-28-2022, 08:25 AM
We moved here 8 years ago. My wife was adamant about not wanting to move here because of her two grown children (that love me very much) from her previous marriage.
I told her we can't let the children decide our lives. Due to back injuries my wife was having a hard time getting up and down stairs so I said we're moving to a rancher. And since I love to golf so much I figured this was the place to be. Now we're both glad we made the move and children and grandchildren visit frequently...
:bigbow::bigbow:
DaleDivine
04-28-2022, 08:27 AM
https://www.talkofthevillages.com/forums/attachments/villages-florida-general-discussion-73/93532d1651152137-question-parents-grandparents-living-tv-aaab065-jpeg
Especially if they ride around in golf cart with a clipboard.
:1rotfl::1rotfl::1rotfl:
PugMom
04-28-2022, 09:06 AM
The hardest thing of living here is we do not see our kids and grandkids nearly as much as we used to. Than again covid sure has not helped
yes, Covid was the gamechanger in visits from family. everyone from 'home' were under extreme lockdown & couldn't leave the state, much less come here. plans were cancelled & trips postponed. we saw a daughter & grandkids for the 1st time in 2years only last month. it was during that time i missed them the most
ffresh
04-28-2022, 09:07 AM
Thank you, I didn't know that. I don't understand why people from the "friendliest hometown" are so snarky. I couldn't find anything in the OP that deserved a snark.
Perspective :icon_wink:
Perspective - Definition, Meaning & Synonyms | Vocabulary.com (https://www.vocabulary.com/dictionary/perspective)
Fred
PugMom
04-28-2022, 09:13 AM
We moved here 8 years ago. My wife was adamant about not wanting to move here because of her two grown children (that love me very much) from her previous marriage.
I told her we can't let the children decide our lives. Due to back injuries my wife was having a hard time getting up and down stairs so I said we're moving to a rancher. And since I love to golf so much I figured this was the place to be. Now we're both glad we made the move and children and grandchildren visit frequently...
:bigbow::bigbow:
what a happy story- it looks like your move was meant to be :coolsmiley:
LianneMigiano
04-28-2022, 12:17 PM
In 2010 we made "the big move" from CT to The Villages. Three of our 4 children (and 2 grandchildren) remained there. As another responder has noted here, the holidays with children were often split between in-laws and us. Even when we went from FL to visit up north, the cost of flights, rental cars etc. were nearly squandered because the kids all had jobs and the "grands" were in school. We have become really fortunate in that 2 of our oldest children moved here in 2020! They love it here as much as we do. It will be quite a while before the remaining "northerner" could even consider a move to The Villages due to the age of his children - but my hope is that I live long enough to see the day that it happens.
Two Bills
04-28-2022, 01:02 PM
Wife and I have moved countless times, never leaving a forwarding address, but kids keep tracking us down!:icon_wink:
Stu from NYC
04-28-2022, 01:35 PM
Wife and I have moved countless times, never leaving a forwarding address, but kids keep tracking us down!:icon_wink:
Want to make sure they know where their inheritance is going:a040:
Stu from NYC
04-28-2022, 01:36 PM
yes, Covid was the gamechanger in visits from family. everyone from 'home' were under extreme lockdown & couldn't leave the state, much less come here. plans were cancelled & trips postponed. we saw a daughter & grandkids for the 1st time in 2years only last month. it was during that time i missed them the most
Covid not finished with us. Oldest grandkids with parents supposed to come two weeks ago and covid decided to change the plan when SIL and 8 year old came down positive.
Thankfully vaccinated and boosted and mild cases for both.
joelfmi
04-28-2022, 08:51 PM
[QUOTE=Michael G.;2089447]My wife and I have one adopted son with our daughter-in-law living close by here in Florida. Our son and wife treat my wife and I wonderful in so many ways to mention.
The four of us travel a lot, play cards, and spent a lot of time together.
Wife and I where never blessed with grandchildren and wondered about people here in Florida that just pulled up stakes and left their sons, daughters and young grandchildren some were miles out of state.
Do you feel a void part of your life by missing them dearly and being part of their lives?
Do you wish you lived closer to enjoy them besides a occasional phone call or visit? A lot of loved ones abandon family whether they live far or close because they are engrossed in personal problems and and make excuses not to see their grandparents. Or if they do they want to be compensated to do so, so sad that we are in different time generation were money plays a great apart in family life. A lot of obvious negative thing have happened that have made this happen within in the last 5 years. all around us
OhioBuckeye
04-29-2022, 07:51 AM
Well we’re in a situation like you. We are originally from Ohio & live in Texas now. Our daughter & her married family live in Texas too. Our son & his family are still in Ohio. We had a realtor look for a house for us in Ohio (Lima, Oh. area) for 3 yrs. never got a call about any house, so our daughter wanted us to live close to her, so we live there now. It’s a little better now because we only have to go see our son & his married daughter, & his son. But now our situation is gas prices & prices of everything else that Putin started, LOL. We love both our children very much, I’m sure our son & his family feel cheated & might think we love our daughter more. Don’t know what to tell you other than go & see them as much as you can & vise versa!
NotGolfer
04-29-2022, 10:15 AM
Our kids were living LIFE and had to make time for us before we moved here. They lived a distance away and we had to share them with their inlaws for some of the holidays. For instance---this T.G. and Christmas they go to the other side----then "maybe" the next year it would be our turn. They work during the week so---well you can figure that out. We have two grown grandchildren, no littles---they were teens when we moved here so had grown into jobs, friends, activities that took up their time. When we'd visit they "might" breeze in between events to greet us then would be on their way. We figured we can visit when the weather turns nice up there (NOT going in winter). Covid hit and there was A LOT of rules. We had no trouble coming down here so are thankful we made the decision. IF our kids decided on a "LIFE-change" as we have---they'd go ahead and do it without wondering about "what will mom and dad think?"
I also will add that at one time, our two lived on opposite coasts (we were in the middle). THEN we both had jobs so planning visits took strategy. Mostly they came to visit us. NOW age and health make it difficult for us to travel. You'd think the family would come and visit us---not so much these last couple of years. One has a spouse with extreme health issues (think: life-threatening) so can't get away. The other---well my guess is as good as any other. Thoughts have been a spouse who doesn't like to travel. When we've made the effort in the past it wasn't fun when we had to work around "their" schedules (work etc.) Kind of expensive to fly up for a long weekend PLUS they live hours apart so LOTS of driving on our part. If you're healthy---go for it and do what you have to do. To be snarky isn't helpful or uplifting for anyone. Thank you to the person who appreciated my original post. I tried to make it clear of what our situation is.
ThirdOfFive
04-30-2022, 06:52 AM
Such a thoughtful question from a well adjusted family person, yet "grumpy old..." have to make snarky unnecessary comments. :ohdear: I just want to remind people that you can "IGNORE" people who typically leave rude comments, by going to "USER SETTINGS" at top of page (write out the person's name before so you'll remember, or copy and paste). On the left of the page there is a SETTINGS & OPTIONS paragraph, click on Edit Ignore List. Type in the person you want to Ignore, press OKAY and Poof, no more unnecessary grump on your feed. Very useful tool for those of us who try to avoid debbie downers. Have a great day everybody!
:ho:
Bingo.
There are those who aren't happy until they make everyone around them as miserable as they are.
Pamela1130
07-14-2022, 05:18 PM
It sounds like you have the best of both worlds. As I began plans to leave NJ and begin my life here I thought about it a lot. I raised 4 kids on my own after being widowed early, so perhaps it was time for me? I would be leaving them and my 8 grandkids behind. Although, my oldest daughter had moved to TX with her 2 kids a few years before. It occurred to me that any of my kids might be required to move out of state for the same reason. Despite being within 15 minutes of my other 3 kids and 6 grands, I didn’t see them often except for one of them. Sure we had holidays together and then there was the babysitting duties that I cherished….well, maybe not always. Add on top of this the fact that living in NJ is extremely costly, I made the decision to move. My daughter asked me why I wanted to leave and I responded that I felt like I was sitting around waiting to die. Her response was “then I want you to go”. Since moving here my TX daughter has moved to Orlando and my son bought a home in Naples. Do I wish we were all together, yes I do. But that is life in the 21st century. We are a mobile society and have the ability to FaceTime anytime we want and I cherish the moments when my phone rings and my 11 year old grandson’s face appears and he talks for half an hour. I also cherish the visits to NJ and theirs to FL. That’s my sincere answer to your question.
I love your explanation. I feel also suddenly that I am just waiting around to die and not living life to it's full potential. I have been researching TV quite a bit and I really feel it is for me. Though I would need to convince my husband, but I think he would feel the same once we visit. Anyway, thank you for your post.
Veiragirl
07-18-2022, 12:39 PM
Grandkids care about Grandparents until they're about 7.Then it's "what did you bring me" Kids are kids. They like to be with other kids. It totally blows my mind that people move back ( to a cold climate) to be with a 4 year old grandkid. They change their entire lives around a kid who , at that time, loves Grandma and Grandpa. Give it another 3 years or so and you are not really that important to them. Live YOUR life. You worked hard for it. Don't live for your kids or grandkids. ENJOY YOUR LIFE.
Stu from NYC
07-18-2022, 03:05 PM
Grandkids care about Grandparents until they're about 7.Then it's "what did you bring me" Kids are kids. They like to be with other kids. It totally blows my mind that people move back ( to a cold climate) to be with a 4 year old grandkid. They change their entire lives around a kid who , at that time, loves Grandma and Grandpa. Give it another 3 years or so and you are not really that important to them. Live YOUR life. You worked hard for it. Don't live for your kids or grandkids. ENJOY YOUR LIFE.
Well our oldest grandchild is now 11 and we are still a major part of his life even though he is over 800 miles away.
He has his own social life now but does spend quite a bit of time with us when we visit
Would not move their to be with them but sure wish we could see them more.
Michael G.
07-18-2022, 08:26 PM
Thank you for all that replied to my post.
I hope your families reunite once the covid ends
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