When In Rome...

[ThirdOfFive]

Something that's becoming more and more apparent the longer we live here, is the (for want of a better word) disconnect between Villagers and locals. It is not too noticeable in TV, though there are some exceptions, but I've been making it a point to meet and talk to locals (golf course workers, yard service workers, pest control), and have made some friends outside TV, and there is a definite "us against them" attitude. Not on the part of everyone, to be sure; maybe not even on the part of a majority, but enough. Mostly it seems to be a benign mistrust, but on the part of some it is definite antipathy, bordering on hatred. But in general the prevailing feeling seems to be that we Villagers look down on the people who were born and raised here, or who come here for the laborer jobs.

I do my own yard work. A couple of weeks ago I was out mowing, drenched with sweat, then the trash collectors came; a couple of Hispanic men. I shut down the mower and asked "how ya doin"? The driver, noticing that I was bagging the clippings said "Your grass..I take!". I laughed and said I'd save it for the next pickup. They both laughed and continued on their way. Now every time they see me, they make sure to wave. The point? I am dead sure they'd never treat me in a friendly fashion if I hadn't made the first (positive) move.

We're the guests here. My thought is that we bear the lion's share of the responsibility in doing what we can to keep Villager-Local relations friendly. We live in a bubble, but that bubble has boundaries, and if those people peering into the bubble from the outside or meet our service needs inside don't like us or even actively hate us...well, that's uncomfortable. And it could conceivably be, in some circumstances, dangerous.

What can we do to make it less so?

[Stu from NYC]

We do have more in common with people in our age group.

[Ecuadog]

To begin any interaction, with anybody, I smile and ask, "How are you today?"

[Chi-Town]

To some we are foreign occupiers. That's a hard mind to change. But being friendly helps with most and can neutralize preconceived notions.

[vintageogauge]

I don't see any more disconnect between those living in TV and the neighboring residents than I do between villager to villager. There are people living in TV from all walks of life, some bought $30,000 mobile homes others million dollar premiers. Put them all in bathing suits and toss them in the pool they all look the same to me. It all boils down to personalities and attitudes. I own a retail business and my customers are 50/50 villagers and village neighbors and I have not found any dislike from either group and the subject of where do you live comes up frequently. As a matter of fact I don't even know why you would start a topic like this, it does more harm than good. If I lived in a neighboring community I would find your post to be an insult.

[MartinSE]

I agree, but it is some not all. I think the main problem is we are not members of their tribe and they are not members of our tribe, and The Villages is changing their way of life. One thing for sure is people in general do not like change in the lives. This was a quiet small community for a LONG time, now the surrounds are like suburbs of a big city (175,000 and growing). To complicate matters more, most of the residents here are grumpy old people that insult anyone too young to live here (well, they also spend a lot of time practicing their insults on each other.) But those doing the insulting tend to be the minority - hundreds out of thousands?

[Mortal1]

I disagree that we are "strangers" here. Having lived from Japan to Scotland I've never felt I was a stranger. I get the feeling that some who do feel like strangers bring that feeling upon themselves. Since I treat most people like I want to be treated I have almost zero encounters and had the feeling I was a stranger more in my home town due to the change in population characteristics more than anything else. We had become a town of inconsiderations, lack of common sense and disrespectful attitudes. We were judged by what what world policies we had instead of how we acted. People treated people who didn't think like them as an enemy with no room for discussion.

Here in Florida, in the villages the attitude outside our bubble and inside people seem to respect each other no matter where they're from...until someone opens their mouth and proves otherwise. I find that if you act entitled(this includes many variables)you're likely to be treated in a cold and possibly unfriendly manner.

[ThirdOfFive]

I disagree that we are "strangers" here. Having lived from Japan to Scotland I've never felt I was a stranger. I get the feeling that some who do feel like strangers bring that feeling upon themselves. Since I treat most people like I want to be treated I have almost zero encounters and had the feeling I was a stranger more in my home town due to the change in population characteristics more than anything else. We had become a town of inconsiderations, lack of common sense and disrespectful attitudes. We were judged by what what world policies we had instead of how we acted. People treated people who didn't think like them as an enemy with no room for discussion.

Here in Florida, in the villages the attitude outside our bubble and inside people seem to respect each other no matter where they're from...until someone opens their mouth and proves otherwise. I find that if you act entitled(this includes many variables)you're likely to be treated in a cold and possibly unfriendly manner.
That word "entitled" seems to be the point of view held by a number of the non-Villagers in the area. Like any stereotype, it is undoubtedly outgrown its origins but it is still there. One incident I was made aware of was one where a local stopped at one of the markets in TV do do some shopping before going home. According to this person a woman shopper in the store, apparently a Villager, asked the manager to make the person leave because he was apparently sweaty after working all day. Whether or not this is true or not is open to question but it was said with some emotion so I believe it. This person also added that there are locals who live near TV, that drive to Ocala to shop to avoid having contact with Villagers.

Scary, to think that such attitudes exist.

[Dond1959]

The OP is spot on with his assessment. Being one of the few here born and raised in North Florida it is more of a South Georgia culture than the rest of Florida. South Florida is nothing like the small communities that dot North Florida such as Wildwood and Lady Lake and even Ocala. It definitely depends on how you treat the people who perform services and keep this place running. Engaging them and treating them respectfully will go a long way. Unfortunately there are a good number who demand and bully and give the Villagers a bad name. I always talk to anyone who comes out for a few minutes and talk about being raised and born in north Florida. It is amazing you can see them relax and open up when I talk to them.

I have only been here 4 years but I have unfortunately seen a lot of clueless Villagers. One example was at a restaurant recently. It was crowded and there were 3 of us waiting for the hostess to get a second to help us. Well, here comes a loud guy pushing his way in front of everyone and demanding he be helped. The hostess handled it well and had him wait until the others were helped. The guy was completely clueless that he did anything. You see it on social media all the time when someone doesn’t receive “perfect” service they hammer the business. Unfortunately I think those that feel entitled never recognize when they are acting like a spoiled brat.

[Dr Winston O Boogie jr]

I think the some of the natives look “up their nose “ at us as a whole. Often once we get to know them or they us on an individual basis, that can change.

[Bill14564]

That word "entitled" seems to be the point of view held by a number of the non-Villagers in the area. Like any stereotype, it is undoubtedly outgrown its origins but it is still there. One incident I was made aware of was one where a local stopped at one of the markets in TV do do some shopping before going home. According to this person a woman shopper in the store, apparently a Villager, asked the manager to make the person leave because he was apparently sweaty after working all day. Whether or not this is true or not is open to question but it was said with some emotion so I believe it. This person also added that there are locals who live near TV, that drive to Ocala to shop to avoid having contact with Villagers.

Scary, to think that such attitudes exist.

And there are Villagers who avoid certain restaurants because they are filled with non-Villagers. On this site and in the online paper that cannot be named you see complaints going both ways. Bad apples exist on both sides and unfortunately, a few bad apples really do create the stereotype.

I've seen Villagers with the "I can afford to live here" chip on their shoulder... I don't blame non-Villagers wanting to avoid them, I avoid them too.

I don't believe I have ever been treated differently when someone from outside the bubble learned where I lived. Maybe I've just been lucky. On the other hand, I have sensed the air of entitlement from some who live inside the bubble and I'm not alone in that.

[ThirdOfFive]

The OP is spot on with his assessment. Being one of the few here born and raised in North Florida it is more of a South Georgia culture than the rest of Florida. South Florida is nothing like the small communities that dot North Florida such as Wildwood and Lady Lake and even Ocala. It definitely depends on how you treat the people who perform services and keep this place running. Engaging them and treating them respectfully will go a long way. Unfortunately there are a good number who demand and bully and give the Villagers a bad name. I always talk to anyone who comes out for a few minutes and talk about being raised and born in north Florida. It is amazing you can see them relax and open up when I talk to them.

I have only been here 4 years but I have unfortunately seen a lot of clueless Villagers. One example was at a restaurant recently. It was crowded and there were 3 of us waiting for the hostess to get a second to help us. Well, here comes a loud guy pushing his way in front of everyone and demanding he be helped. The hostess handled it well and had him wait until the others were helped. The guy was completely clueless that he did anything. You see it on social media all the time when someone doesn’t receive “perfect” service they hammer the business. Unfortunately I think those that feel entitled never recognize when they are acting like a spoiled brat.
That restaurant incident is interesting, and probably happens with some regularity.

We hadn't been here for a month total, and went to have lunch at Cracker Barrel. The line was pretty long so I (respectfully) asked the hostess if we were going to have a long wait.

She put an arm around me and said "why, it ain't gonna be that long at all, honey".

THAT lady knew how to handle Villagers.

[MartinSE]

That word "entitled" seems to be the point of view held by a number of the non-Villagers in the area. Like any stereotype, it is undoubtedly outgrown its origins but it is still there. One incident I was made aware of was one where a local stopped at one of the markets in TV do do some shopping before going home. According to this person a woman shopper in the store, apparently a Villager, asked the manager to make the person leave because he was apparently sweaty after working all day. Whether or not this is true or not is open to question but it was said with some emotion so I believe it. This person also added that there are locals who live near TV, that drive to Ocala to shop to avoid having contact with Villagers.

Scary, to think that such attitudes exist.

I agree with you, and when growing up we called that attitude "snooty". And it was NOT a compliment!

[Michael G.]

I agree with you, and when growing up we called that attitude "snooty". And it was NOT a compliment!

For some unknown reason The Villages and the people in it seem to get a bad rap even national wide, and I heard that is before moving here from up north.

Some refer to people in TV with having more money than brains coming from various service people that come in from the outside. They say those people are dumm and wealthy enough to take the first quote and pay too much.

Some say people from the New England states are snobs, terrible drivers and think Florida
owes them moving here.

I believe we all heard before some of this before

[MrFlorida]

Its called being friendly, it works no matter where you live.

[Djean1981]

I totally agree we should be friendly to everyone. It's good to frequently leave the "bubble" to shop and visit restaurants and chit chat with others. However I live here, probably for the next 20-30 years.. I'm not a guest.

[MartinSE]

For some unknown reason The Villages and the people in it seem to get a bad rap even national wide, and I heard that is before moving here from up north.

Some refer to people in TV with having more money than brains coming from various service people that come in from the outside. They say those people are dumm and wealthy enough to take the first quote and pay too much.

Some say people from the New England states are snobs, terrible drivers and think Florida
owes them moving here.

I believe we all heard before some of this before

So true about what people say.

I can assure you (and them) I am NOT rich - LOL! My wife and I both drive cars over 11 years old, not because we can't afford a new one but there are other things we prefer and those cars are still good, nice and reliable.

Not to long ago I was making a living by driving a cash register in a convince store in Phoenix.

There are some here are "well off", maybe a few that are "rich", but my experience is most are closer to what USED TO BE called middle class to upper middle class.

[Bogie Shooter]

That word "entitled" seems to be the point of view held by a number of the non-Villagers in the area. Like any stereotype, it is undoubtedly outgrown its origins but it is still there. One incident I was made aware of was one where a local stopped at one of the markets in TV do do some shopping before going home. According to this person a woman shopper in the store, apparently a Villager, asked the manager to make the person leave because he was apparently sweaty after working all day. Whether or not this is true or not is open to question but it was said with some emotion so I believe it. This person also added that there are locals who live near TV, that drive to Ocala to shop to avoid having contact with Villagers.

Scary, to think that such attitudes exist.

////////

[Djean1981]

Good. I don't sense a discord either. Many people you see working outside The Villages (like at Dollar General) actually live in The Villages.

[Djean1981]

////////
I don't believe that .

[Bogie Shooter]

The OP is spot on with his assessment. Being one of the few here born and raised in North Florida it is more of a South Georgia culture than the rest of Florida. South Florida is nothing like the small communities that dot North Florida such as Wildwood and Lady Lake and even Ocala. It definitely depends on how you treat the people who perform services and keep this place running. Engaging them and treating them respectfully will go a long way. Unfortunately there are a good number who demand and bully and give the Villagers a bad name. I always talk to anyone who comes out for a few minutes and talk about being raised and born in north Florida. It is amazing you can see them relax and open up when I talk to them.

I have only been here 4 years but I have unfortunately seen a lot of clueless Villagers. One example was at a restaurant recently. It was crowded and there were 3 of us waiting for the hostess to get a second to help us. Well, here comes a loud guy pushing his way in front of everyone and demanding he be helped. The hostess handled it well and had him wait until the others were helped. The guy was completely clueless that he did anything. You see it on social media all the time when someone doesn’t receive “perfect” service they hammer the business. Unfortunately I think those that feel entitled never recognize when they are acting like a spoiled brat.

The restaurant incident can be experienced anywhere…………..not that unusual.

[Bogie Shooter]

I don't believe that .

Probably wouldn’t have believed what was deleted.👿

[Djean1981]

Definitely not... ������

[Taltarzac725]

We became Rome and many roads for retirees lead here.

[ThirdOfFive]

For some unknown reason The Villages and the people in it seem to get a bad rap even national wide, and I heard that is before moving here from up north.

Some refer to people in TV with having more money than brains coming from various service people that come in from the outside. They say those people are dumm and wealthy enough to take the first quote and pay too much.

Some say people from the New England states are snobs, terrible drivers and think Florida
owes them moving here.

I believe we all heard before some of this before
All that national negativity proves, in my opinion, is that sensationalism and sleaze sells far better than rainbows and unicorns. Articles that talk about hobby clubs and water aerobics might be good for travel brochures or the occasional Sunday supplement magazine, but the REAL money is in stories and shows about alcohol abuse, key clubs and rampant STDs, regardless of whether they're true or not.

More concerning should be the attitudes of the people next door, not the people on the other side of the continent.

[Stu from NYC]

So true about what people say.

I can assure you (and them) I am NOT rich - LOL! My wife and I both drive cars over 11 years old, not because we can't afford a new one but there are other things we prefer and those cars are still good, nice and reliable.

Not to long ago I was making a living by driving a cash register in a convince store in Phoenix.

There are some here are "well off", maybe a few that are "rich", but my experience is most are closer to what USED TO BE called middle class to upper middle class.

How fast did that register go!:clap2:

[La lamy]

Something that's becoming more and more apparent the longer we live here, is the (for want of a better word) disconnect between Villagers and locals. It is not too noticeable in TV, though there are some exceptions, but I've been making it a point to meet and talk to locals (golf course workers, yard service workers, pest control), and have made some friends outside TV, and there is a definite "us against them" attitude. Not on the part of everyone, to be sure; maybe not even on the part of a majority, but enough. Mostly it seems to be a benign mistrust, but on the part of some it is definite antipathy, bordering on hatred. But in general the prevailing feeling seems to be that we Villagers look down on the people who were born and raised here, or who come here for the laborer jobs.

I do my own yard work. A couple of weeks ago I was out mowing, drenched with sweat, then the trash collectors came; a couple of Hispanic men. I shut down the mower and asked "how ya doin"? The driver, noticing that I was bagging the clippings said "Your grass..I take!". I laughed and said I'd save it for the next pickup. They both laughed and continued on their way. Now every time they see me, they make sure to wave. The point? I am dead sure they'd never treat me in a friendly fashion if I hadn't made the first (positive) move.

We're the guests here. My thought is that we bear the lion's share of the responsibility in doing what we can to keep Villager-Local relations friendly. We live in a bubble, but that bubble has boundaries, and if those people peering into the bubble from the outside or meet our service needs inside don't like us or even actively hate us...well, that's uncomfortable. And it could conceivably be, in some circumstances, dangerous.

What can we do to make it less so?

Having been raised in a middle class setting where we were taught to do ALL types of work without having to dish out labor costs, sure taught me to never look down on anyone that does an honest day's of hard work. I once chopped down a whole rotting banana tree in TV and helped the garbage men load it in the truck. Showing respect for all is the way to go in my book.

[ThirdOfFive]

Having been raised in a middle class setting where we were taught to do ALL types of work without having to dish out labor costs, sure taught me to never look down on anyone that does an honest day's of hard work. I once chopped down a whole rotting banana tree in TV and helped the garbage men load it in the truck. Showing respect for all is the way to go in my book.
In a nutshell.

[Michael G.]

Here's one jester people forget about on a hot day,
offer service people doing service at your house, a bottle of water.

[Stu from NYC]

Here's one jester people forget about on a hot day,
offer service people doing service at your house, a bottle of water.

Do that all the time. Rather hot here during the summer

[MartinSE]

More concerning should be the attitudes of the people next door, not the people on the other side of the continent.

Absolutely. It seems that, in my neighborhood, most people are friendly and polite. Regardless of whose flag is flying in their yard, when we meet it is all friendly.

I expect people behave much differently when they are hiding behind a screen than when they are face to face with their neighbors.

[MartinSE]

How fast did that register go!:clap2:

I was actually amazed. It went about $1 million per month in cash sales (most gas was CC) - we hade $30K to $40k deposits per day.

One thing I did learn there was just how stupid people are. We had $30K worth of cigarettes behind the counter unlocked all the time. Anyone could easily have come up and robbed us in couple minutes throwing all those in the back of a van (and we were instructed by corporate to help them in any way we could - never resist. But instead they would come in and demand the $50 we had in the cash register - LOL!

[MartinSE]

Here's one jester people forget about on a hot day,
offer service people doing service at your house, a bottle of water.

WOW! That made me feel badly. I am getting a case and putting it in the freezer today.

Thank you! Great Idea! Especially now that we are into Summer days.

[Stu from NYC]

I was actually amazed. It went about $1 million per month in cash sales (most gas was CC) - we hade $30K to $40k deposits per day.

One thing I did learn there was just how stupid people are. We had $30K worth of cigarettes behind the counter unlocked all the time. Anyone could easily have come up and robbed us in couple minutes throwing all those in the back of a van (and we were instructed by corporate to help them in any way we could - never resist. But instead they would come in and demand the $50 we had in the cash register - LOL!

Guess they didnt smoke and thought selling them was too much work.

[Bogie Shooter]

WOW! That made me feel badly. I am getting a case and putting it in the freezer today.

Thank you! Great Idea! Especially now that we are into Summer days.

Unbelievable.

[New Englander]

We became Rome and many roads for retirees lead here.

You're right. All roads lead to Rome!

[billethkid]

IWe have been here over 18 years.
I do not see anymore connect/disconnect than anyplace we have ever lived.

There will always be jerks and out of line type folks no matter the mix or where from.

I do believe there is a significant difference and that is the density of us elders......more than anyplace we have ever lived (probably true for all or most TV residents).

Even with that.....I find that if you are friendly in your manner most of the rest of the world responds in kind......because they like it too!

[Inexes@aol.com]

Having been employed as an RN in Home Health Care, I found out early on......when asked by the patients in the outlying areas "where I lived" .... NOT to say The Villages. They immediately started complaining about how "we" came in here and changed everything they loved. The response was always the same, TV changed their laid-back lifestyle, bringing in all the restaurants, businesses, traffic, etc. I would ask why that was not considered a convenience, saving them having to drive miles for these things. The answer was again, always the same... if we wanted to live near the big city we would not have moved here. Most were really nasty once they found out you lived in TV. By the same token.... when seeing patients in TV, most of the HHC workers were treated rudely, as though they were doing us a favor, letting us into their homes. Once they found out you lived in TV... their demeanor changed and they treated you with a little respect. Throughout my 17 years working in the HHC field here in TV, it was a known fact in the agencies that the employees preferred a caseload outside TV due to the rudeness of the patients residing in TV. Quite a few of the employees refused to see patients living in TV. A sad statement.

[Villagevip]

We are not guest here, we are American citizens.....Free to travel to all fifty states, and buy what we desire within our limits.....Buying property anywhere in America, eliminates any question of being a guest, In the here and now...

[Bogie Shooter]

I don't see any more disconnect between those living in TV and the neighboring residents than I do between villager to villager. There are people living in TV from all walks of life, some bought $30,000 mobile homes others million dollar premiers. Put them all in bathing suits and toss them in the pool they all look the same to me. It all boils down to personalities and attitudes. I own a retail business and my customers are 50/50 villagers and village neighbors and I have not found any dislike from either group and the subject of where do you live comes up frequently. As a matter of fact I don't even know why you would start a topic like this, it does more harm than good. If I lived in a neighboring community I would find your post to be an insult.

Read this earlier today. Now after reading all the posts I tend to agree with your opinion.

[thevillages2013]

:a20:How fast did that register go!:clap2:
:a20:

[MartinSE]

I do believe there is a significant difference and that is the density of us elders......more than anyplace we have ever lived (probably true for all or most TV residents).


I agree completely, I find a lot of the people here are very dense - oh, wait, that is not what you meant, sorry.


(Sorry, I couldn't resist! :) )

[Worldseries27]

and there are villagers who avoid certain restaurants because they are filled with non-villagers. On this site and in the online paper that cannot be named you see complaints going both ways. Bad apples exist on both sides and unfortunately, a few bad apples really do create the stereotype.

I've seen villagers with the "i can afford to live here" chip on their shoulder... I don't blame non-villagers wanting to avoid them, i avoid them too.

I don't believe i have ever been treated differently when someone from outside the bubble learned where i lived. Maybe i've just been lucky. On the other hand, i have sensed the air of entitlement from some who live inside the bubble and i'm not alone in that.
we have the way

[Sandy and Ed]

I don't see any more disconnect between those living in TV and the neighboring residents than I do between villager to villager. There are people living in TV from all walks of life, some bought $30,000 mobile homes others million dollar premiers. Put them all in bathing suits and toss them in the pool they all look the same to me. It all boils down to personalities and attitudes. I own a retail business and my customers are 50/50 villagers and village neighbors and I have not found any dislike from either group and the subject of where do you live comes up frequently. As a matter of fact I don't even know why you would start a topic like this, it does more harm than good. If I lived in a neighboring community I would find your post to be an insult.
I have to agree. No need to stir a pot. Just treat EVERYONE like you expect to be treated. I don’t look down my nose at anyone and don’t expect them to look down their nose at me.

[Luggage]

There are a lot of we are better than them type personalities that live here. One small example is that I was on a cruise with my wife years ago and we were sitting down to watch the entertainment and we struck up a small conversation with four single Ladies just in front of us, the minute they found out we were outside of the villages they turned around and did not talk to us. I find that very typical of" we are better than them mentality"

My mother would say they are a bunch of stuck up people thinking "they are better than everyone else"
In reality they were four old ladies who have lost their husbands or have been divorced and just don't understand how to be friendly to people.

Also unfortunately there are a lot of old bitter people living in this area whether they're from the villages or not.

And yet we have made friends here that are just nice people.

"I find that if you act entitled(this includes many variables)you're likely to be treated in a cold and possibly unfriendly manner"

[me4vt]

Most Village People think they’re “Better” than others that’s other developments not just locals and service people! And the majority of those Villagers are from one area of the United States which I needed say because they know who they are. I’d give $100 for the Readers Digest from the the early 80’s that invited people to the up and coming “Villages” in a advertisement…..

[Eg_cruz]

We do have more in common with people in our age group.
Not sure what age has to do with reaching out the others that don’t live in TV but work here. This would be one of the those entitled educational moments

[Villages Kahuna]

You’ve discovered why people describe The Villages as “living in a bubble”.

The attitude of the locals towards Villagers ranges from indifferent tolerance to downright hatred. How would you feel if suddenly a community of 145,000 self-interested, non-working, almost entirely Caucasian, wealthy northerners dropped into the middle of your modest, unhurried, rural southern community?

We justify our existence by saying how much we’ve helped the locals by providing jobs and increased income and not thinking for a moment that the people who lived here liked it the way it was.

I remember a young woman who had to deliver something to our house in Mallory shaking her head over the massive development and saying that when she was a teenager this was all pastureland where she and her friends would ride their horses for hours on end. Now she observed, all that is gone.

That’s why Villagers often describe leaving the confines of The Villages and others who live here as “going off campus”.

[Eg_cruz]

Something that's becoming more and more apparent the longer we live here, is the (for want of a better word) disconnect between Villagers and locals. It is not too noticeable in TV, though there are some exceptions, but I've been making it a point to meet and talk to locals (golf course workers, yard service workers, pest control), and have made some friends outside TV, and there is a definite "us against them" attitude. Not on the part of everyone, to be sure; maybe not even on the part of a majority, but enough. Mostly it seems to be a benign mistrust, but on the part of some it is definite antipathy, bordering on hatred. But in general the prevailing feeling seems to be that we Villagers look down on the people who were born and raised here, or who come here for the laborer jobs.

I do my own yard work. A couple of weeks ago I was out mowing, drenched with sweat, then the trash collectors came; a couple of Hispanic men. I shut down the mower and asked "how ya doin"? The driver, noticing that I was bagging the clippings said "Your grass..I take!". I laughed and said I'd save it for the next pickup. They both laughed and continued on their way. Now every time they see me, they make sure to wave. The point? I am dead sure they'd never treat me in a friendly fashion if I hadn't made the first (positive) move.

We're the guests here. My thought is that we bear the lion's share of the responsibility in doing what we can to keep Villager-Local relations friendly. We live in a bubble, but that bubble has boundaries, and if those people peering into the bubble from the outside or meet our service needs inside don't like us or even actively hate us...well, that's uncomfortable. And it could conceivably be, in some circumstances, dangerous.

What can we do to make it less so?
The truth of the matter is a lot of people from out of state act is if the boarded a luxury cruise ship and the help is here to serve at their leisure.

[snhmhg]

Something that's becoming more and more apparent the longer we live here, is the (for want of a better word) disconnect between Villagers and locals. It is not too noticeable in TV, though there are some exceptions, but I've been making it a point to meet and talk to locals (golf course workers, yard service workers, pest control), and have made some friends outside TV, and there is a definite "us against them" attitude. Not on the part of everyone, to be sure; maybe not even on the part of a majority, but enough. Mostly it seems to be a benign mistrust, but on the part of some it is definite antipathy, bordering on hatred. But in general the prevailing feeling seems to be that we Villagers look down on the people who were born and raised here, or who come here for the laborer jobs.

I do my own yard work. A couple of weeks ago I was out mowing, drenched with sweat, then the trash collectors came; a couple of Hispanic men. I shut down the mower and asked "how ya doin"? The driver, noticing that I was bagging the clippings said "Your grass..I take!". I laughed and said I'd save it for the next pickup. They both laughed and continued on their way. Now every time they see me, they make sure to wave. The point? I am dead sure they'd never treat me in a friendly fashion if I hadn't made the first (positive) move.

We're the guests here. My thought is that we bear the lion's share of the responsibility in doing what we can to keep Villager-Local relations friendly. We live in a bubble, but that bubble has boundaries, and if those people peering into the bubble from the outside or meet our service needs inside don't like us or even actively hate us...well, that's uncomfortable. And it could conceivably be, in some circumstances, dangerous.

What can we do to make it less so?

It’s not the people at all. Many businesses have thrived, and many people have become financially benefited from the population growth. Local business owners truly appreciate your patronages, and the support your clubs and organizations give back to our communities. It’s the massive takeover of growth, the cutting down of all the gorgeous old oaks. It’s so hard, if not impossible, to find a piece of land for family to buy and build on, generations have lived near each other forever. Some of us just wish the continued growth and expansion would stop, so our area can still have a few spots that somewhat resemble the homesteads we have lived in all our lives. And the Villages school, you can’t send your kid unless you work for the villages. Public schools, while good schools, just don’t have the same resources for facilities and programs. Now comes the road expansion proposal through some of the prettiest lands left, taking homes and uprooting people who have been here all their lives, so the issue is it’s all development and politics, not you, so don’t feel unwelcome as a resident!

[egmcaninch]

Something that's becoming more and more apparent the longer we live here, is the (for want of a better word) disconnect between Villagers and locals. It is not too noticeable in TV, though there are some exceptions, but I've been making it a point to meet and talk to locals (golf course workers, yard service workers, pest control), and have made some friends outside TV, and there is a definite "us against them" attitude. Not on the part of everyone, to be sure; maybe not even on the part of a majority, but enough. Mostly it seems to be a benign mistrust, but on the part of some it is definite antipathy, bordering on hatred. But in general the prevailing feeling seems to be that we Villagers look down on the people who were born and raised here, or who come here for the laborer jobs.

I do my own yard work. A couple of weeks ago I was out mowing, drenched with sweat, then the trash collectors came; a couple of Hispanic men. I shut down the mower and asked "how ya doin"? The driver, noticing that I was bagging the clippings said "Your grass..I take!". I laughed and said I'd save it for the next pickup. They both laughed and continued on their way. Now every time they see me, they make sure to wave. The point? I am dead sure they'd never treat me in a friendly fashion if I hadn't made the first (positive) move.

We're the guests here. My thought is that we bear the lion's share of the responsibility in doing what we can to keep Villager-Local relations friendly. We live in a bubble, but that bubble has boundaries, and if those people peering into the bubble from the outside or meet our service needs inside don't like us or even actively hate us...well, that's uncomfortable. And it could conceivably be, in some circumstances, dangerous.

What can we do to make it less so?

My wife & I are active at FBC Leesburg. We also visit The Springs at Lady Lake (LTC facility) each Tuesday to sing, have a devotional and simply visit. At the same time, I enjoy my neighbors in Fenney, where we live. From our perspective, we don't feel segmented - we feel blessed.

[mkjelenbaas]

Something that's becoming more and more apparent the longer we live here, is the (for want of a better word) disconnect between Villagers and locals. It is not too noticeable in TV, though there are some exceptions, but I've been making it a point to meet and talk to locals (golf course workers, yard service workers, pest control), and have made some friends outside TV, and there is a definite "us against them" attitude. Not on the part of everyone, to be sure; maybe not even on the part of a majority, but enough. Mostly it seems to be a benign mistrust, but on the part of some it is definite antipathy, bordering on hatred. But in general the prevailing feeling seems to be that we Villagers look down on the people who were born and raised here, or who come here for the laborer jobs.

I do my own yard work. A couple of weeks ago I was out mowing, drenched with sweat, then the trash collectors came; a couple of Hispanic men. I shut down the mower and asked "how ya doin"? The driver, noticing that I was bagging the clippings said "Your grass..I take!". I laughed and said I'd save it for the next pickup. They both laughed and continued on their way. Now every time they see me, they make sure to wave. The point? I am dead sure they'd never treat me in a friendly fashion if I hadn't made the first (positive) move.

We're the guests here. My thought is that we bear the lion's share of the responsibility in doing what we can to keep Villager-Local relations friendly. We live in a bubble, but that bubble has boundaries, and if those people peering into the bubble from the outside or meet our service needs inside don't like us or even actively hate us...well, that's uncomfortable. And it could conceivably be, in some circumstances, dangerous.

What can we do to make it less so?
Good luck!!

[coconutmama]

We not guest here, we are American citizens.....Free to travel all the states, and buy what we desire within our limits.....Buying property anywhere in America, eliminates any question of being a guest In the here and now...

Totally agree. Wish we’d all remember that we are all Americans, and truly are better together. Can buy property anywhere we can afford. And where that is does not make us better or less so than anyone else.

Unfortunately that is not always the attitude. Depending on the situation I have said I was from Wildwood or Leesburg rather than from TV. Sad but true. There can be a misconception out there of the people who live in our city, and a city is what it has become. It has just grown laterally as opposed to vertically (so far).

[airstreamingypsy]

You’ve discovered why people describe The Villages as “living in a bubble”.

The attitude of the locals towards Villagers ranges from indifferent tolerance to downright hatred. How would you feel if suddenly a community of 145,000 self-interested, non-working, almost entirely Caucasian, wealthy northerners dropped into the middle of your modest, unhurried, rural southern community?

We justify our existence by saying how much we’ve helped the locals by providing jobs and increased income and not thinking for a moment that the people who lived here liked it the way it was.

Nailed it!! I get so tired of people blathering about "all the jobs we've created" People did like it the way it was. Villagers do treat locals like they are beneath them. It was beautiful when it was rolling meadows with horses and cattle grazing in the fields. Pave paradise and put up a parking lot.

[Bikehike]

If the Tri-County area is Rome then The Villages is Vatican City.... er maybe the Coliseum?

[G.R.I.T.S.]

I do the same thing, but it's just how I was raised. But to your point about "us against them," it was never more prevalent as when I entered the master gardener program many years ago. Back then, those from south Sumter pretty much despised those volunteers from TV. I bridged the gap with several of them, as we share a common southern heritage, but there were some that just were intolerant of us. What's funnier is that some of "them" were transplants from areas north of here but felt infringement into their rural lifestyle. I totally understand and empathize. But life's too short, especially at this stage! Just smile & go on.

[Bilyclub]

Nailed it!! I get so tired of people blathering about "all the jobs we've created" People did like it the way it was. Villagers do treat locals like they are beneath them. It was beautiful when it was rolling meadows with horses and cattle grazing in the fields. Pave paradise and put up a parking lot.

Is was so great here that your neighbors sold out to the developer.

[ThirdOfFive]

Nailed it!! I get so tired of people blathering about "all the jobs we've created" People did like it the way it was. Villagers do treat locals like they are beneath them. It was beautiful when it was rolling meadows with horses and cattle grazing in the fields. Pave paradise and put up a parking lot.
Some of it is natural, I suppose. Human nature.

I dealt with it decades ago. Far northern Minnesota, where my family lived, is prime hunting country (grouse, deer, moose). Sparsely populated to say the least: I remember times as a kid when being snowed in for four or even five days was not uncommon, but we made do. Each November however there was an influx of hunters from the southern part of the state: many had purchased land up there and had hunting "cabins" where they and their cronies would use we headquarters for their stay. We called 'em "Joe Cities". Stories abounded about their poor woodsmanship skills, bad marksmanship and the fact that some of them didn't wait for the hunting to stop to for the drinking to start. Some stories were probably true, many probably not or greatly exaggerated, but we took them as gospel. They weren't especially liked by the locals and they knew it. They pretty much kept to themselves. Never did learn what they thought of us, but I imagine it wasn't all that complimentary.

Stereotypes may have their basis in truth but become highly exaggerated with time, and there were plenty of stereotypes back then. Not unlike here.

[Larchap49]

The OP is spot on with his assessment. Being one of the few here born and raised in North Florida it is more of a South Georgia culture than the rest of Florida. South Florida is nothing like the small communities that dot North Florida such as Wildwood and Lady Lake and even Ocala. It definitely depends on how you treat the people who perform services and keep this place running. Engaging them and treating them respectfully will go a long way. Unfortunately there are a good number who demand and bully and give the Villagers a bad name. I always talk to anyone who comes out for a few minutes and talk about being raised and born in north Florida. It is amazing you can see them relax and open up when I talk to them.

I have only been here 4 years but I have unfortunately seen a lot of clueless Villagers. One example was at a restaurant recently. It was crowded and there were 3 of us waiting for the hostess to get a second to help us. Well, here comes a loud guy pushing his way in front of everyone and demanding he be helped. The hostess handled it well and had him wait until the others were helped. The guy was completely clueless that he did anything. You see it on social media all the time when someone doesn’t receive “perfect” service they hammer the business. Unfortunately I think those that feel entitled never recognize when they are acting like a spoiled brat.

In a lot of cases it may depend on our past life. I have always been blue collar or low to middle management both as an employee and business owner that had to supply a high level of customer service. I think a lot of people here come from the executive level or wealthy backgrounds and have been catered to most of their lives and are not willing to step back in retirement to being one of the crowd. Those types will go to their graves thinking that they better than most and deserve to have their butts kissed by anyone not of their perceived social standings. I love every opportunity I get or see to put them in their place.

[Niferlou06]

Something that's becoming more and more apparent the longer we live here, is the (for want of a better word) disconnect between Villagers and locals. It is not too noticeable in TV, though there are some exceptions, but I've been making it a point to meet and talk to locals (golf course workers, yard service workers, pest control), and have made some friends outside TV, and there is a definite "us against them" attitude. Not on the part of everyone, to be sure; maybe not even on the part of a majority, but enough. Mostly it seems to be a benign mistrust, but on the part of some it is definite antipathy, bordering on hatred. But in general the prevailing feeling seems to be that we Villagers look down on the people who were born and raised here, or who come here for the laborer jobs.

I do my own yard work. A couple of weeks ago I was out mowing, drenched with sweat, then the trash collectors came; a couple of Hispanic men. I shut down the mower and asked "how ya doin"? The driver, noticing that I was bagging the clippings said "Your grass..I take!". I laughed and said I'd save it for the next pickup. They both laughed and continued on their way. Now every time they see me, they make sure to wave. The point? I am dead sure they'd never treat me in a friendly fashion if I hadn't made the first (positive) move.

We're the guests here. My thought is that we bear the lion's share of the responsibility in doing what we can to keep Villager-Local relations friendly. We live in a bubble, but that bubble has boundaries, and if those people peering into the bubble from the outside or meet our service needs inside don't like us or even actively hate us...well, that's uncomfortable. And it could conceivably be, in some circumstances, dangerous.

What can we do to make it less so?

I agree completly with what you have said and the answer is to simply BE NICE. The world needs more of that. Treat everyone you meet with respect.

[MidWestIA]

No generalities are true but I was talking with a outside contractor and he mention non villages don't like villagers. Probably some of it is we had more higher income jobs up north & west and they look at what we have compared to what they can afford with the pay they can get down here. But some of it is a small percentage of people acting privileged or obnoxious and I have seen way more of that here than in Iowa or Texas. The general claim is big city eastern people develop a attitude I guess to survive in the big city. I've had people working in stores ask where I was from then saw oh you are ok based on where I am from.

[Pgcacace]

Something that's becoming more and more apparent the longer we live here, is the (for want of a better word) disconnect between Villagers and locals. It is not too noticeable in TV, though there are some exceptions, but I've been making it a point to meet and talk to locals (golf course workers, yard service workers, pest control), and have made some friends outside TV, and there is a definite "us against them" attitude. Not on the part of everyone, to be sure; maybe not even on the part of a majority, but enough. Mostly it seems to be a benign mistrust, but on the part of some it is definite antipathy, bordering on hatred. But in general the prevailing feeling seems to be that we Villagers look down on the people who were born and raised here, or who come here for the laborer jobs.

I do my own yard work. A couple of weeks ago I was out mowing, drenched with sweat, then the trash collectors came; a couple of Hispanic men. I shut down the mower and asked "how ya doin"? The driver, noticing that I was bagging the clippings said "Your grass..I take!". I laughed and said I'd save it for the next pickup. They both laughed and continued on their way. Now every time they see me, they make sure to wave. The point? I am dead sure they'd never treat me in a friendly fashion if I hadn't made the first (positive) move.

We're the guests here. My thought is that we bear the lion's share of the responsibility in doing what we can to keep Villager-Local relations friendly. We live in a bubble, but that bubble has boundaries, and if those people peering into the bubble from the outside or meet our service needs inside don't like us or even actively hate us...well, that's uncomfortable. And it could conceivably be, in some circumstances, dangerous.

What can we do to make it less so?

I used to say when I was at the square, when I met someone new, "What village do you live in?" Now I just say, " Do you live in the area?" Don´t assume that everyone around here lives in the villages. It breaks the ice easier.

[Stu from NYC]

We are here about 2 1/2 years and have never thought that non villagers resent us. Talk nicely to folks and you get same back.

[Rodneysblue]

Something that's becoming more and more apparent the longer we live here, is the (for want of a better word) disconnect between Villagers and locals. It is not too noticeable in TV, though there are some exceptions, but I've been making it a point to meet and talk to locals (golf course workers, yard service workers, pest control), and have made some friends outside TV, and there is a definite "us against them" attitude. Not on the part of everyone, to be sure; maybe not even on the part of a majority, but enough. Mostly it seems to be a benign mistrust, but on the part of some it is definite antipathy, bordering on hatred. But in general the prevailing feeling seems to be that we Villagers look down on the people who were born and raised here, or who come here for the laborer jobs.

I do my own yard work. A couple of weeks ago I was out mowing, drenched with sweat, then the trash collectors came; a couple of Hispanic men. I shut down the mower and asked "how ya doin"? The driver, noticing that I was bagging the clippings said "Your grass..I take!". I laughed and said I'd save it for the next pickup. They both laughed and continued on their way. Now every time they see me, they make sure to wave. The point? I am dead sure they'd never treat me in a friendly fashion if I hadn't made the first (positive) move.

We're the guests here. My thought is that we bear the lion's share of the responsibility in doing what we can to keep Villager-Local relations friendly. We live in a bubble, but that bubble has boundaries, and if those people peering into the bubble from the outside or meet our service needs inside don't like us or even actively hate us...well, that's uncomfortable. And it could conceivably be, in some circumstances, dangerous.

What can we do to make it less so?
My wife and I have always worked for a living, weather it was housekeeping ina nursing home to secretary to the chief of the school district police department of a 119 schools. Myself, from amusement park mechanic to head custodian night supervisor of a large high school. We go out of are way to say hello and engage with everyone we meet. I like to bring water out to sanitation workers, delivery people and our lawn service operator. And thank them and wish the a a great day. It’s not much,, but I remember how much I appreciated it when someone would do something nice for me.

[OrangeBlossomBaby]

This is an amusing thread. Lots of perceptions about lots of issues, some that strike a hypocritical cord, some sincere. Here's my take on it:

Everyone who moves TO the Villages from somewhere "up north" is an immigrant to this place. We all immigrated. How does it feel to have the natives treat us with scorn and suspicion? We haven't done anything wrong, we're taxpayers, we're injecting the area with increased revenue at the stores, keeping them open for business, providing jobs. And many of us, who want to rely on our social security checks, will accept the minimum-wage positions so as to keep our SS checks coming - which leaves the management positions available to the locals who need their paychecks to feed their families.

I totally get it. Coming from a place where immigration is celebrated, to a place filled with immigrants who demand to be immediately accepted and revered rather than earning their place in the community, I totally get it.

I am an immigrant to the Villages from up north. I appreciate the natives who were here before me or anyone else in the neighborhood. I appreciate the workers who live outside our bubble, and make sure to tell them that, and treat them with the dignity and respect that they deserve.

I actually LISTEN to them when they talk to me, instead of just pretending, as if I were someone who didn't speak their language and didn't care to learn it.

And yes - the ones who speak Spanish, I listen to them too. Knowing the language of the people who work for you is very handy. Y'all should try it some time. It can be an eye-opener.

I think most Villagers are probably nice folks, who just want to enjoy their retirement and not have to think about entitlement or privilege or what it means. But there are some, a minority, who are loud about their "rights." They served in this or that military outfit and therefore should be treated as superior to the people serving them their dinner at the restaurant. They raised 6 kids in poverty and earned every cent they have, so they have the "right" to make demands in a curt tone to the guy changing their tires.

They give the rest of us a bad name. And unfortunately, they are very loud.

So if you want us to have a better reputation, I'll say - EARN it. Be pro-active, get out there, get involved, LISTEN to the native Floridians who live in this Central region, listen to their stories, watch them interact with each other, participate in THEIR community.

Or you can just sit back and complain that they treat us like outsiders. We ARE outsiders.

[ElDiabloJoe]

The OP is spot on with his assessment. Being one of the few here born and raised in North Florida it is more of a South Georgia culture than the rest of Florida. South Florida is nothing like the small communities that dot North Florida such as Wildwood and Lady Lake and even Ocala. It definitely depends on how you treat the people who perform services and keep this place running. Engaging them and treating them respectfully will go a long way. Unfortunately there are a good number who demand and bully and give the Villagers a bad name. I always talk to anyone who comes out for a few minutes and talk about being raised and born in north Florida. It is amazing you can see them relax and open up when I talk to them.

I have only been here 4 years but I have unfortunately seen a lot of clueless Villagers. One example was at a restaurant recently. It was crowded and there were 3 of us waiting for the hostess to get a second to help us. Well, here comes a loud guy pushing his way in front of everyone and demanding he be helped. The hostess handled it well and had him wait until the others were helped. The guy was completely clueless that he did anything. You see it on social media all the time when someone doesn’t receive “perfect” service they hammer the business. Unfortunately I think those that feel entitled never recognize when they are acting like a spoiled brat.

Interesting. That happens in retirement communities/areas all over the south. In one such place in Tennessee, I had a locally born/raised guy over for some minor labor. He pretty quickly says to me, "You're not from Chicago, are you?" The implication (as he later expounded) was that folks from "up north" were rude, demanding, entitled, criticizing every stroke of every shovel-full he dug, and eyeballed him suspiciously the entire time as if to ensure they weren't getting ripped off.

[jamorela]

Something that's becoming more and more apparent the longer we live here, is the (for want of a better word) disconnect between Villagers and locals. It is not too noticeable in TV, though there are some exceptions, but I've been making it a point to meet and talk to locals (golf course workers, yard service workers, pest control), and have made some friends outside TV, and there is a definite "us against them" attitude. Not on the part of everyone, to be sure; maybe not even on the part of a majority, but enough. Mostly it seems to be a benign mistrust, but on the part of some it is definite antipathy, bordering on hatred. But in general the prevailing feeling seems to be that we Villagers look down on the people who were born and raised here, or who come here for the laborer jobs.

I do my own yard work. A couple of weeks ago I was out mowing, drenched with sweat, then the trash collectors came; a couple of Hispanic men. I shut down the mower and asked "how ya doin"? The driver, noticing that I was bagging the clippings said "Your grass..I take!". I laughed and said I'd save it for the next pickup. They both laughed and continued on their way. Now every time they see me, they make sure to wave. The point? I am dead sure they'd never treat me in a friendly fashion if I hadn't made the first (positive) move.

We're the guests here. My thought is that we bear the lion's share of the responsibility in doing what we can to keep Villager-Local relations friendly. We live in a bubble, but that bubble has boundaries, and if those people peering into the bubble from the outside or meet our service needs inside don't like us or even actively hate us...well, that's uncomfortable. And it could conceivably be, in some circumstances, dangerous.

What can we do to make it less so?
I often run out and give Gatorade to the trash people. I also do it to any service people that come to my place. They always appreciate it.

[Dan Cagle]

You guys are making this way too difficult. Life is simple: As we used to say in Pinckneyville, "when in Rome do as those damn Romanians do".....solved :)

[Monika Greiner]

Years ago I had a young guy working for me, he asked me where I am from, I replied from Germany. He then asked me if we have electricity there, I replied no we build Mercedes by candlelight.

[Bogie Shooter]

Years ago I had a young guy working for me, he asked me where I am from, I replied from Germany. He then asked me if we have electricity there, I replied no we build Mercedes by candlelight.

Good example of what people are saying………..