Looking to Move with Nervous Mother

[Danth1980]

We are considering moving to TV and will be there in just over a week on a pre-Lifestyle visit our Lifestyle visit is in Mid-September. My mother who will be 90 yo in a few months lives with us and is getting nervous about the move. She currently uses senior transportation to take her to doctors appointments and daily to the local senior center. At the senior Center she exercises has lunch and talks with friends. Are there services similar to this in TV for those no longer driving? Or would we just drop her off at a rec center and pick her up later? Any information would be appreciated. Thanks

[retiredguy123]

Transportation for doctor visits is seriously lacking in The Villages.

[Carla B]

Just my opinion as a 15-year resident: The focus of The Villages lifestyle is on the active over-55 population. Although I think Sumter County has some sort of transit service requiring a reservation, there is no widespread readily accessible system for those who no longer drive. Ironically, while the houses are built with many features for aging in place, the services needed to do so have not kept pace. Many senior residences have been built that do provide for elders' needs. But moving to a facility negates the ability to age in place.

[Taltarzac725]

We are considering moving to TV and will be there in just over a week on a pre-Lifestyle visit our Lifestyle visit is in Mid-September. My mother who will be 90 yo in a few months lives with us and is getting nervous about the move. She currently uses senior transportation to take her to doctors appointments and daily to the local senior center. At the senior Center she exercises has lunch and talks with friends. Are there services similar to this in TV for those no longer driving? Or would we just drop her off at a rec center and pick her up later? Any information would be appreciated. Thanks

There are paid services and do recall one that is free.

Senior Transport In The Villages, FL - GaeLynns Home

Care (https://gaelynnshomecare.com/senior-transport-the-villages-fl/)

Transportation - DOEA (https://elderaffairs.org/programs-services/transportation/)

[LuvtheVillages]

We are considering moving to TV and will be there in just over a week on a pre-Lifestyle visit our Lifestyle visit is in Mid-September. My mother who will be 90 yo in a few months lives with us and is getting nervous about the move. She currently uses senior transportation to take her to doctors appointments and daily to the local senior center. At the senior Center she exercises has lunch and talks with friends. Are there services similar to this in TV for those no longer driving? Or would we just drop her off at a rec center and pick her up later? Any information would be appreciated. Thanks

There is no public transportation service like that. You could drop her off at a rec center for an exercise or yoga class. Classes last about an hour. During high season, a line forms as much as an hour ahead of time. Classes are first come first served, no reservations.

None of the rec centers serve food. Some have a restaurant nearby.

[Taltarzac725]

https://elderhelpers.org/index9.php?gad=1&gclid=EAIaIQobChMI6MeDn7

You could try this resource.

[LuvNH]

Don't do this to her. She is living a very full life for her age where she is and that will come to an end if you move her here.

My husband was hospitalized twice, each time for about 16 days, then into rehab for four weeks and unfortunately I have macular and can no longer drive. I am fortunate and do live in a Village that has a volunteer service for transportation but you have to wait for a period of time to get accepted into the system. I had to pay Uber and a taxi service to just get to the hospital to see him, a matter of 12 miles, and it cost me $12 to $15 each way, plus tip.

In my honest opinion, this is not the place for someone who can no longer drives and has an active social life and a senior center. No such thing here. TV is for the active retiree.

[OrangeBlossomBaby]

There are independent-to-assisted living facilities in the Villages which might be more suitable than a stand-alone home. They allow people to transition when they can no longer do things independently. They have a housekeeping staff, a cafeteria usually with food included in the monthly fee, barber/beauty salon, library, other communal living spaces, and of course basic medical facilities (on-site nursing staff, medication dispensary, emergency medical equipment, etc) in addition to the private modest apartment for the resident.

These facilities also have transportation to shopping centers, the town squares, Walmart, and so on.

[retiredguy123]

An independent living facility would be appropriate if she doesn't need any regular medical assistance. But, you can expect to pay about $6,000 per month, which would include meals. Note that only a few of them offer access to The Villages amenities, such as the rec centers. I would suggest visiting Sumter Senior Living on Rt 466A and Watercrest on Rt 466 while you are here.

[Danth1980]

Thanks for all the helpful and informative replies, and links. We will stop at the Sumter Senior Living Center while down there to discuss what is available.
This is not an easy situation trying to do the best for my mother while still trying to enjoy our lives. My sister sure has it easy, oh well! (no, my mother will not go stay with her).

[Velvet]

Don't do this to her. She is living a very full life for her age where she is and that will come to an end if you move her here.

My husband was hospitalized twice, each time for about 16 days, then into rehab for four weeks and unfortunately I have macular and can no longer drive. I am fortunate and do live in a Village that has a volunteer service for transportation but you have to wait for a period of time to get accepted into the system. I had to pay Uber and a taxi service to just get to the hospital to see him, a matter of 12 miles, and it cost me $12 to $15 each way, plus tip.

In my honest opinion, this is not the place for someone who can no longer drives and has an active social life and a senior center. No such thing here. TV is for the active retiree.

I agree, my impression is that TV is built for an active life style - but as soon as you need services eg public transportation etc this place is not for you. It is expected that you move into an assisted living facility (or you have a live-in caregiver) which is what my aunt did. Although she so much wanted to age in the house she lived in for 25 years.

[Taltarzac725]

About Us | Right at Home | Clermont, FL (https://www.rightathome.net/clermont/about-us)

We use Right at Home and they will take their clients out to places.

And there are a lot of these companies serving people here in the Villages and surrounding communities.

In Home Care | The Villages, FL | Ocala, FL (https://www.conciergecarefl.com/locations/the-villages-fl-ocala-fl/)

In-Home Care The Villages, FL | Home Health Care Services (https://grannynannies.com/The-Villages?gclid=EAIaIQobChMI-vzl69qigAMVzaVaBR1KRQ76EAAYAiAAEgJQzfD_BwE)

[LuvNH]

Thanks for all the helpful and informative replies, and links. We will stop at the Sumter Senior Living Center while down there to discuss what is available.
This is not an easy situation trying to do the best for my mother while still trying to enjoy our lives. My sister sure has it easy, oh well! (no, my mother will not go stay with her).

Don't give up on moving to Florida. If you reword your request you might find you get answers from people who have been through what you are going through, and have found retirement communities that have what you are looking for ..... but TV is not the place for her. You could also do a search for retirement communities offering what you need. I wish you well.

[MrFlorida]

Not much to do for a non active senior. No real transportation, or places to hang out all day, except maybe the pool. Some centers have games and activities, but only for a short periods of time...Nice of you to bring her, but she might be missing her old lifestyle and friends rather quickly.

[Velvet]

About Us | Right at Home | Clermont, FL (https://www.rightathome.net/clermont/about-us)

We use Right at Home and they will take their clients out to places.

And there are a lot of these companies serving people here in the Villages and surrounding communities.

In Home Care | The Villages, FL | Ocala, FL (https://www.conciergecarefl.com/locations/the-villages-fl-ocala-fl/)

In-Home Care The Villages, FL | Home Health Care Services (https://grannynannies.com/The-Villages?gclid=EAIaIQobChMI-vzl69qigAMVzaVaBR1KRQ76EAAYAiAAEgJQzfD_BwE)

Glad to know of these services. Perhaps they were not there when my aunt was alive. My uncle and she moved to TV in 1992. She looked after him until he died but when she needed help later, it was either not available or not affordable - I’m not sure which. She had to sell her beloved home to move into an assisted/independent living facility.

[rjm1cc]

You are making a major change to an active persons life style. If she stayed home and watched TV then I would say ok, but since her friends will not be here and transportation maybe a problem I would say it is a no go in terms of her needs.

[Taltarzac725]

Senior rides and transportation: 5 alternatives to driving (https://www.care.com/c/transportation-options-for-seniors-local-and/)

You can probably hire a senior aide for a few hours each day to take your Mom places and stay with her.

And the Palliative Hospices have volunteers who do this. Cornerstone Hospice and Palliative Care (https://cornerstonehospice.org/) But these are hopefully for much later.

Hospice, Palliative Care, & End of Life Services | VITAS Healthcare (https://www.vitas.com/)

[njbchbum]

You might care to review each of these internet searches re senior centers like it sounds your Mother is used to:

wildwood fl senior center at DuckDuckGo (https://duckduckgo.com/?t=h_&q=wildwood+fl+senior+center&ia=web)

https://duckduckgo.com/?q=lady+lake+fl+senior+center&t=h_&ia=maps

some of the needles in the haystack seem to offer activities, lunch and camaraderie

[thelegges]

We were in the same situation, mom had choices for 3 senior centers within5 minutes of house. They had pick up service from 2 of the community churches. Lunch, crafts and special events.

So when she came here for a visit it became apparent that there was nothing available for a non driving resident that she was used to. It wasn’t about friends, but the availability to get to the centers and enjoy the day. Her doctors appointments were every 6 months so not a problem.

She was miserable here, even with siblings and nieces and nephews. So back north she went. It’s not ideal, and no our sibling only cares about money, not well being. Not ideal to be so far away, but she is so much happier than being in TV. She is 91

[Taltarzac725]

We were in the same situation, mom had choices for 3 senior centers within5 minutes of house. They had pick up service from 2 of the community churches. Lunch, crafts and special events.

So when she came here for a visit it became apparent that there was nothing available for a non driving resident that she was used to. It wasn’t about friends, but the availability to get to the centers and enjoy the day. Her doctors appointments were every 6 months so not a problem.

She was miserable here, even with siblings and nieces and nephews. So back north she went. It’s not ideal, and no our sibling only cares about money, not well being. Not ideal to be so far away, but she is so much happier than being in TV. She is 91


I know a lot of people who moved out of the Villages to get back to their families up north. This was for many different reasons though. Often because of some medical care reason.

And some moved back later. But to other parts of the Villages.

One really liked the Historical Section and it would probably be easier to get around by US 441/27 with the help of various in house aids. The lady who moved back found life a lot simpler with a smaller house. And it kind of leaves her some space as there is not enough room in her small home for visiting relatives. They go to nearby hotels.

[thelegges]

I know a lot of people who moved out of the Villages to get back to their families up north. This was for many different reasons though. Often because of some medical care reason.

And some moved back later. But to other parts of the Villages.

One really liked the Historical Section and it would probably be easier to get around by US 441/27 with the help of various in house aids. The lady who moved back found life a lot simpler with a smaller house.

We stayed, parent stayed north. While harder to monitor, today’s technology makes life easier from long distance

[Rzepecki]

Gogograndparent.com

[srctink]

There are lots of independent caregivers/companions in The Villages, that will drive your mom wherever she wants to go. And stay with her for as long as she wants. (I am one of those companions. 954 298-2832

[bowlingal]

Buffalo Crossings has private apartments and rehab facilities if needed, PT and OT. Medical personnel on staff. Lots of activities, transportation, meals, cleaning crews, villages amenities. Worth looking into.

[LizbethD]

We moved here with my mom when she was turning 90. At that time she was able to walk around on her own with a walker and she was mentally alert. She loves music, so I would take her to the shows, movies. Or sometimes find her a seat at the square with coffee and a donut from Dunkin’ to listen to the music in the evening while my husband and I were bowling or I was doing some shopping. You can def drop her off at the rec centers for activities that she is interested in. (Like cards, crafting, etc). I provided transport. However Sumter Cty does have a service. Also, there are senior facilities that offer senior “daycare” all day. They have activities, provide meals, sometimes go out to lunch or a show. An excellent one that I know of is at Mission Oaks on 301. Last I checked it was about $75/day. I believe they provide transport as well. She can go as many or few days as she wants. My moms now going on 96 and not able to get around as well, also more confused unfortunately😕. I wish you luck with your move. I know it’s not easy!

[deborahcme]

Many people I've met here have been "birders"--those folks who live part time here and part time in their original home. It's a good option, I believe for anyone who is thinking about moving here. Provided you can swing it financially, of course. Some folks offset the cost by offering their Villages home as a vacation rental. But here's why it's not a bad idea to try out TV this way. Some people move here and find after all that they don't like it as much as they liked living in their original home area. I met a lady in my exercise class the other day who is doing just that--moving back north. She does not "hate" The Villages; just likes her northern home better. It's an option for you to consider as you navigate this difficult time. It will also give you and your mom a chance to make friends here without the big commitment.

[retiredguy123]

Buffalo Crossings has private apartments and rehab facilities if needed, PT and OT. Medical personnel on staff. Lots of activities, transportation, meals, cleaning crews, villages amenities. Worth looking into.
Buffalo Crossings has assisted living and rehab, but I don't think they have independent living.

[msilagy]

You are very kind to be bringing your mother with you. Not sure my kids would. It will be a change for sure as she is used to a different kind of life at a senior center. I do hope she will adjust but because people are from all over there doesn't seem to be that connection like back home. I am a split Fl resident 6mo up north and 6mo in TV. Maybe try going on NEXT DOOR for the villages area and post the question about your 90 year old mother and are their activities and a chance to meet others to connect with over lunch or etc.? Don't pay too much attention to the naysayers on here as they don't know your Mother. I wish you the best. Good luck to you and God Bless your Mom!

[Dlbonivich]

Brookhaven is the newest center it is fabulous and is going g to be really well run. My friend is the director, much less than $6000. What a facility!

[retiredguy123]

Brookhaven is the newest center it is fabulous and is going g to be really well run. My friend is the director, much less than $6000. What a facility!
Where is it located, does it include 3 meals per day, and does it include access to The Villages amenities for less than $6,000?

[LuvNH]

Gogograndparent.com

Thank you for posting this site. Very interesting. I had no idea there was such a service. It seems somewhat pricey, but if you are no longer running a car, it is very reasonable. I would imagine it is the type of service where you could build a relationship with a driver and get the same person on a regular basis.

[NotGolfer]

Could y'all visit first to get a "feel" of the community? Maybe even rent for a short while. THEN while actually here you could see if it would work, rather than opinions of others on social media sites. I don't blame your mom for being nervous since change is always difficult PLUS a new place will be just that, not the familiar as she's used to now.

[SusanStCatherine]

IMHO, your mother is very fortunate with her current conditions. I can understand why she does not want to change what is working so well for her. Moving here would drastically change that. If your mother's happiness and well being is your top priority, then do not move her here with you. However, if you really want to live here, then you can probably find enough support and services for her here if you work at it and she is willing to adjust. Best wishes!

[Djean1981]

Sumter county provides transportation, arranged in advance. There are also a couple taxi services.

[kendi]

Of course she is nervous. You are taking her away from everything she knows. Her current social connections are especially important. It’s very common for the elderly to become disoriented and depressed when removed from what is familiar to them. Having consistent healthcare providers is important too. Keep in mind that the healthcare is not the best here. Probably at least a few steps inferior to were you are moving from.

[kendi]

Buffalo Crossings has private apartments and rehab facilities if needed, PT and OT. Medical personnel on staff. Lots of activities, transportation, meals, cleaning crews, villages amenities. Worth looking into.

Have heard horror stories about Buffalo Crossing.

[retiredguy123]

Thank you for posting this site. Very interesting. I had no idea there was such a service. It seems somewhat pricey, but if you are no longer running a car, it is very reasonable. I would imagine it is the type of service where you could build a relationship with a driver and get the same person on a regular basis.
The service is just a national call center that sends an Uber or Lyft driver to your house, and then charges you $0.27 per minute in addition to the driver charge. So, a 30 minute ride will cost an extra 8 dollars. Why not just use the Uber and Lyft apps yourself?

You can arrange to have most of the items, such as groceries, restaurant food, prescriptions, and other things delivered to you without leaving your house. And, almost any non-perishable items can be ordered on Amazon and delivered the next day for free.

[SusanStCatherine]

This is the transport for Sumter County:
Transit Passenger Guide | Sumter County, FL - Official Website (https://sumtercountyfl.gov/95/Transit)

Need to qualify and book three days in advance. Costs at least 50 cents. Pickup windows of up to two hours. Limited hours of availability. Probably nowhere near as easy as what she has now.

[palasmith]

My mother moved here at 95 and lived in her own villa. She knew she couldn’t drive a car here but drove her golf cart for shopping and recreational activities. She had a ball. She met so many people who quickly befriended her. She was mentally sharp and independent until she passed away at 98.

[FloridaLady]

We are considering moving to TV and will be there in just over a week on a pre-Lifestyle visit our Lifestyle visit is in Mid-September. My mother who will be 90 yo in a few months lives with us and is getting nervous about the move. She currently uses senior transportation to take her to doctors appointments and daily to the local senior center. At the senior Center she exercises has lunch and talks with friends. Are there services similar to this in TV for those no longer driving? Or would we just drop her off at a rec center and pick her up later? Any information would be appreciated. Thanks

My mom is 89 and lives here however she can drive and lives in her own home. She goes to 2 card games a week but that’s all other than seeing her kids (3 of us also live here) She reads or watches tv and goes with a friend out to eat. She only drives to a few stores and relies on her kids to go outside of TV such as dentist, sams club or BJ …

[retiredguy123]

This is the transport for Sumter County:
Transit Passenger Guide | Sumter County, FL - Official Website (https://sumtercountyfl.gov/95/Transit)

Need to qualify and book three days in advance. Costs at least 50 cents. Pickup windows of up to two hours. Limited hours of availability. Probably nowhere near as easy as what she has now.
LOL. So, with a 2 hour pickup window, if you have a 9 am doctor appointment, you can plan on wasting the entire day.

[GATORBILL66]

There are paid services and do recall one that is free.

Senior Transport In The Villages, FL - GaeLynns Home

Care (https://gaelynnshomecare.com/senior-transport-the-villages-fl/)

Transportation - DOEA (https://elderaffairs.org/programs-services/transportation/)


$50.00 Most of us can't afford that for a doctors appointment. We need some other transportation, maybe a small bus line.

[Taltarzac725]

Have heard horror stories about Buffalo Crossing.

Me too.

[thelegges]

The service is just a national call center that sends an Uber or Lyft driver to your house, and then charges you $0.27 per minute in addition to the driver charge. So, a 30 minute ride will cost an extra 8 dollars. Why not just use the Uber and Lyft apps yourself?

You can arrange to have most of the items, such as groceries, restaurant food, prescriptions, and other things delivered to you without leaving your house. And, almost any non-perishable items can be ordered on Amazon and delivered the next day for free.

Uber is a good in most places….but in TV not so much.. use app all the time in other parts of the country but rarely has the app given me a pick up time here. I can get Uber from Metro airport to my Waterford home ( driver israrely happy no fare back to city for them) but if I want Waterford to Metro nothing available

Same for TV we just don’t have Uber cars sitting around TV hoping for a fair. They sit where they know a constant flow of customers are. Even DoorDash can be iffy at times here.

[retiredguy123]

Uber is a good in most places….but in TV not so much.. use app all the time in other parts of the country but rarely has the app given me a pick up time here. I can get Uber from Metro airport to my Waterford home ( driver israrely happy no fare back to city for them) but if I want Waterford to Metro nothing available

Same for TV we just don’t have Uber cars sitting around TV hoping for a fair. They sit where they know a constant flow of customers are. Even DoorDash can be iffy at times here.
I agree, but a national call center cannot make it any better, and they charge you by the minute.

[Villagesgal]

Sumter County has a service for seniors. You have to call ahead to schedule it. They send a mini bus directly to your home, take her where she needs to go and will pick her up to take her home at the scheduled time. It works quite well. Call Sumter County to get the full info. It is for elderly seniors or handicapped people who cannot drive. Those posting that nothing is available don't know what they are talking about. I have lived in Sumter County for 22 years and we used this service for my husband before he passed.

[Karmanng]

Transportation for doctor visits is seriously lacking in The Villages.

Guess I will be doing that once I get there along with dog sitting...........NOT JUST PETS

[Karmanng]

You are making a major change to an active persons life style. If she stayed home and watched TV then I would say ok, but since her friends will not be here and transportation maybe a problem I would say it is a no go in terms of her needs.

NOT true my Aunt just left her friends behind in Chicago to live with her daughter and she LOVES it there

[Velvet]

Sumter County has a service for seniors. You have to call ahead to schedule it. They send a mini bus directly to your home, take her where she needs to go and will pick her up to take her home at the scheduled time. It works quite well. Call Sumter County to get the full info. It is for elderly seniors or handicapped people who cannot drive. Those posting that nothing is available don't know what they are talking about. I have lived in Sumter County for 22 years and we used this service for my husband before he passed.

Did he always have to face a 2 hour window for pick up?

[retiredguy123]

Sumter County has a service for seniors. You have to call ahead to schedule it. They send a mini bus directly to your home, take her where she needs to go and will pick her up to take her home at the scheduled time. It works quite well. Call Sumter County to get the full info. It is for elderly seniors or handicapped people who cannot drive. Those posting that nothing is available don't know what they are talking about. I have lived in Sumter County for 22 years and we used this service for my husband before he passed.
Not exactly. The program you referred is not just based on age and disability. It is based on income. I suspect that many Villagers do not qualify because their income is too high. Also, what about Villagers who live in Lake County or Marion County? There are many Villagers who can well afford transportation, but it is not available.

[PugMom]

There are paid services and do recall one that is free.

Senior Transport In The Villages, FL - GaeLynns Home

Care (https://gaelynnshomecare.com/senior-transport-the-villages-fl/)

Transportation - DOEA (https://elderaffairs.org/programs-services/transportation/)

they're wonderful people, a big vote for them

[PugMom]

Have heard horror stories about Buffalo Crossing.

dittos Harbor Chase

[villagetinker]

OP, when my wife and I moved here we offered to move my mother, she said NO she did not want to leave her assisted living home. Since there were still a few relatives in the area, we abided by her wishes. We kept in touch by phone, and discussions with the staff. The other relatives were also able to stop by occasionally. She really enjoyed her final years with all of her friends.
Hope you find a solution to your situation, but IMHO, I would not move her.

[midiwiz]

Thanks for all the helpful and informative replies, and links. We will stop at the Sumter Senior Living Center while down there to discuss what is available.
This is not an easy situation trying to do the best for my mother while still trying to enjoy our lives. My sister sure has it easy, oh well! (no, my mother will not go stay with her).

be very careful with that, we almost sued them. their medical team is at best inexperienced in geriatrics. Do your due diligence with every place as they just want to sell rooms so everything is good.... you'll find out months later it's not.

[villageuser]

We are considering moving to TV and will be there in just over a week on a pre-Lifestyle visit our Lifestyle visit is in Mid-September. My mother who will be 90 yo in a few months lives with us and is getting nervous about the move. She currently uses senior transportation to take her to doctors appointments and daily to the local senior center. At the senior Center she exercises has lunch and talks with friends. Are there services similar to this in TV for those no longer driving? Or would we just drop her off at a rec center and pick her up later? Any information would be appreciated. Thanks

Call Tri County Senior Services. This is exactly what they do - - they provide information on services available for senior citizens in our area, plus are able to get access to and coordinate these services.
Their web site is TriCounty Care Giver Resource Center . Org. (Remove the spaces and you get the website).
The phone number is 352-551-1260.

[rogerk]

We are considering moving to TV and will be there in just over a week on a pre-Lifestyle visit our Lifestyle visit is in Mid-September. My mother who will be 90 yo in a few months lives with us and is getting nervous about the move. She currently uses senior transportation to take her to doctors appointments and daily to the local senior center. At the senior Center she exercises has lunch and talks with friends. Are there services similar to this in TV for those no longer driving? Or would we just drop her off at a rec center and pick her up later? Any information would be appreciated. Thanks
While here tell your representative about your concerns and needs relating to your Mom. They have a group of folks who can provide advice and is knowledgeable about available resources. Also talk to the county(s) you are looking to buy in as to what services are available for your Mom. Good luck!

[Whitley]

Hi: The Villages is a great place for all ages. If you move here when you are 55, 65, and are fortunate to make it to your 90's or 100's, it is great. Lots of emotional support. Moving ANYWHERE when you are ninety is iffy. I do not want to be overly dramatic, but it change for the elderly is traumatic. I recall one 93 yo man from Baltimore that allowed me to sit in on sessions between him and my prof (his therapist). His daughter was called by the police to come get him because he was standing on a corner, almost in tears, very confused. The man made the same trek, daily, for years. From the home, to the newspaper store, and back. A small insignificant (to us) building was torn down along his route. It had been being worked on for weeks, but the prior day it was taken down. This created the reaction described above. You are faced with a very tricky situation. I wish you and Mom the best (does she know anyone down here at TV?).

[Danth1980]

Thanks for all the thoughtful and helpful input on this subject and especially the links to agencies. My wife and I will still be coming down next week and for a week in September, but we will also be renting through a good part of the winter and bringing my mother for as much as she is comfortable with. Yes, this was a discussion where she did take part in. Then we will decide plans for going forward based on how mom does in TV. We will also be visiting the Sumpter county officials and other agencies to see what services they have to offer. We truly want to make this a win win situation for all of us.

[yankygrl]

OP, when my wife and I moved here we offered to move my mother, she said NO she did not want to leave her assisted living home. Since there were still a few relatives in the area, we abided by her wishes. We kept in touch by phone, and discussions with the staff. The other relatives were also able to stop by occasionally. She really enjoyed her final years with all of her friends.
Hope you find a solution to your situation, but IMHO, I would not move her.
Not sure if I missed something I original question or not, but I believe the ordinal post stated mom lives with them not already in ALF