Cremation

[Ralphy]

Cremation is my last hope for a smoking hot body.
:laugh:

[JohnN]

works for me, Ralphy

[village dreamer]

i told my wife i wanted to be cremated.......she said ill make you an appointment for next friday :0000000000luvmyhors

[fdpaq0580]

Told my wife I wanted to be cremated. She said I'd only make an ash out of myself. 😒

[Whatnext]

Teacher asked little Johnny why he was not at school the day before.
Johnny replied, "My daddy was burnt."
"Badly?" asked the teacher.
Johnny replied,"The don't muck about at the Crematorium Miss!"

[thelegges]

Have to ask for many friends……

Does OP have joke of the day calendar? Or book of jokes for 9-11yo.:D

[Ralphy]

Have to ask for many friends……

Does OP have joke of the day calendar? Or book of jokes for 9-11yo.:D
no and no

[Gene63]

My wife and I are both believers and followers of Jesus Christ. We recognize that when we die, this empty shell that we once lived in will not matter anymore. So we looked at the cost of traditional burial and the cost of cremation, and it was an easy decision. Cremation is much less expensive and will leave financially more to our daughters and to causes that meant a lot to us.

[Worldseries27]

my wife and i are both believers and followers of jesus christ. We recognize that when we die, this empty shell that we once lived in will not matter anymore. So we looked at the cost of traditional burial and the cost of cremation, and it was an easy decision. Cremation is much less expensive and will leave financially more to our daughters and to causes that meant a lot to us.
rest easy. When our sun runs out of fuel the earth will be cremated. Long before that humanity will have either gone extinct or migrated to other galaxies. I believe in the latter.

[Battlebasset]

rest easy. When our sun runs out of fuel the earth will be cremated. Long before that humanity will have either gone extinct or migrated to other galaxies. I believe in the latter.

A joke about that:

A scientist was giving a lecture about the sun ultimately going supernova. After the lecture, a very concerned man came up and asked "Did I hear you say the sun was going to go supernova in 5 million years?"

The scientist said, "No, I said 5 billion years". The man stated "Oh thank God", and walked away, relieved.

It doesn't matter what/what doesn't happen. I won't be around to care about it.

[barbnick]

Sense of humor much?

[tophcfa]

Cremation is my last hope for a smoking hot body.
:laugh:

Keep em coming Ralphy : )

[MandoMan]

Cremation is my last hope for a smoking hot body.
:laugh:

Not quite skin and bones. Just bones. Crushed up.

[Rwirish]

Sick

[Marmaduke]

Love your morning jokes Ralphy!
This one made me giggle, before coffee.

[bilcon]

Told my wife I wanted to be cremated. She said I'd only make an ash out of myself. 😒

You "urned" it!

[ThirdOfFive]

You "urned" it!

(groan) :BigApplause:

Couple of years back my daughter inherited the ashes of four family members. Offering to help out I went to Amazon and ordered four urns, two adult and two "mini". When the order came it contained three adult and one mini, so I returned the extra adult urn at the UPS store a few blocks away. The guy behind the counter looked at me quizzically when I put the urn on the counter. "You're returning an URN?"

"That's right", I replied. "I got better".

[fdpaq0580]

(groan) :bigapplause:

Couple of years back my daughter inherited the ashes of four family members. Offering to help out i went to amazon and ordered four urns, two adult and two "mini". When the order came it contained three adult and one mini, so i returned the extra adult urn at the ups store a few blocks away. The guy behind the counter looked at me quizzically when i put the urn on the counter. "you're returning an urn?"

"that's right", i replied. "i got better".

rotflmao! 🤣😂😅🤣😂😆

[fdpaq0580]

Sick

YES! But in a good way. 😉

[nn0wheremann]

Cremation is my last hope for a smoking hot body.
:laugh:
Willie Nelson has a tip for you: https://youtu.be/kn-AB78kvvE?si=j7Fh3JfeQXA_w5od

[JStyles]

Cremation is my last hope for a smoking hot body.
:laugh:

I read this and I laughed out loud. 😂