teach232
05-13-2011, 11:47 AM
I hadn't heard some of these before.
I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don't know what to feed it
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I had amnesia once---or twice
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I went to San Francisco. I found someone's heart. Now what?
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Protons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic.
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All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy
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If the world were a logical place, men would be the ones who ride horses sidesaddle.
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What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?
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They told me I was gullible and I believed them.
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Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home and, when he grows up, he'll never be able to merge his car onto the freeway.
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Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone.
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One nice thing about egotists: they don't talk about other people.
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My weight is perfect for my height--which varies.
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I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
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How can there be self-help "groups"?
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If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?
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Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, and I'll show you a man who can't get his pants off
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Is it me --or do buffalo wings taste like chicken?
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TODAY IS THE OLDEST YOU'VE EVER BEEN, YET THE YOUNGEST YOU'LL EVER BE, SO ENJOY THIS DAY WHILE IT LASTS.
I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don't know what to feed it
********************
I had amnesia once---or twice
********************
I went to San Francisco. I found someone's heart. Now what?
********************
Protons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic.
********************
All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy
********************
If the world were a logical place, men would be the ones who ride horses sidesaddle.
********************
What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?
********************
They told me I was gullible and I believed them.
********************
Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home and, when he grows up, he'll never be able to merge his car onto the freeway.
********************
Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone.
********************
One nice thing about egotists: they don't talk about other people.
********************
My weight is perfect for my height--which varies.
********************
I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
********************
How can there be self-help "groups"?
********************
If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?
********************
Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, and I'll show you a man who can't get his pants off
********************
Is it me --or do buffalo wings taste like chicken?
********************
TODAY IS THE OLDEST YOU'VE EVER BEEN, YET THE YOUNGEST YOU'LL EVER BE, SO ENJOY THIS DAY WHILE IT LASTS.