What happen to polite and nice?

[Gretch298]

I have lived in the Villages for 3 months now, what a wonderful place. I found a part time job that was a real eye opener. I have been treated like I have personally ruined your day because the store is out of your sale item. I smile and say I am sorry. I truely am sorry believe it or not. Last week when leaving my job I came out to a nasty dent in the side of my car. No one bothered to come in to the store to "look" for the owner of the car they hit. I hope they slept well that night, I didn't. I am your neighbor who smiles and says hello so when the lawn people come to do your lawn why do you allow them to park all over my lawn and block me in my driveway? I love it here and want to try hard to learn the ways but I think I am missing something? Any ideas?:wave:

[missypie]

Please keep being who you are, nice. I have a retail business and sometimes people are just not nice. Maybe they were raised in that environment and have lived that way for many years and that is just the way it is for them. Remember, it is not directed specifically at you. It is their makeup of their being. They are rough around the edges to their spouse, children, friends etc...

Keep smiling, enjoying life, The Villages, and your soul. I promise, YOU WILL sleep the best at night.

[graciegirl]

I have lived in the Villages for 3 months now, what a wonderful place. I found a part time job that was a real eye opener. I have been treated like I have personally ruined your day because the store is out of your sale item. I smile and say I am sorry. I truely am sorry believe it or not. Last week when leaving my job I came out to a nasty dent in the side of my car. No one bothered to come in to the store to "look" for the owner of the car they hit. I hope they slept well that night, I didn't. I am your neighbor who smiles and says hello so when the lawn people come to do your lawn why do you allow them to park all over my lawn and block me in my driveway? I love it here and want to try hard to learn the ways but I think I am missing something? Any ideas?:wave:

None of this is new. When you work in retail it is part of what you are paid to do. Be nice to people who aren't nice to you. If lawn people are blocking you, ask them to move. Not leaving information about damaging your car was cowardly and wrong, but sadly it has happened to people for years.

Nothing new.

[Pturner]

:wave: Gretch298,

Please don't let a few bad apples ruin it here for you. Continue to be a good apple like most of the folks here. 'Tis the crowded, winter, more irritable season. This too shall pass.

Sending you a big hug.

[villagerjack]

Sounds like normal every day "stuff" not unique to The Villages. My cars have been dented many times in several states. Around here space particularly in the villas is at a premium. If someome is in your way....just ask them to move.

[Bill-n-Brillo]

The person who banged into your fender - - - - they must have relatives in central OH. Same thing happened to a car of mine a number of years back in a retail store's parking lot. It's just the way some people are, I reckon. Personally, like you, I can't relate to it either!!

Welcome to retail - where it seems like some days, no matter how hard you try, you just can't seem to please anybody. Don't worry - brighter days will be on your horizon!

The upside to it all? You're living in TV! :pepper2: There are many other worse places to be!!

Bill :)

[CFrance]

The person who banged into your fender - - - - they must have relatives in central OH. Same thing happened to a car of mine a number of years back in a retail store's parking lot. It's just the way some people are, I reckon. Personally, like you, I can't relate to it either!!

Welcome to retail - where it seems like some days, no matter how hard you try, you just can't seem to please anybody. Don't worry - brighter days will be on your horizon!

The upside to it all? You're living in TV! :pepper2: There are many other worse places to be!!

Bill :)

that is so true. You could have your brand-new car dented, scraped, and dinged in Michigan or Pennsylvania (I did, I did, and I did), and you AREN'T in the Villages enjoying the sun and the pickleball courts and the classes, and, and, and...

I'm sorry people are nasty to you in the store. Try not to be too upset. Listen to PTurner. She's got it right.

[Gerald]

And here I thought a car was a thing to move you from point A to B. Not something to worry about for a little dent. Things happen, I am sure that the person who accidently hit yor car didn't do it on purpose.
People everywere are some what up tight lately because of money. Then the fact that in the villages most people are a little older just tired. Forgetting that there are always two sides to things. we don't know what life and stress others are having. If you want to be in a place where you need to deal with the public then you have to accept that not everyone is perfect. A smile and sorry goes a long way for the majority. For some it just does not help. You just think about what they are missing. You can deside to be happy or sad. Let the little things go and amazing how the world looks better.

[redwitch]

No question there are some rude and inconsiderate people here. However, there are also some of the nicest, kindest, friendliest people that live here. Working retail you're going to find some of the worst. Just the nature of the beast. Driving around TV in a golf cart, going to the squares and talking to others, participating in your favorite activities gives you a chance to find some of the best. Also the nature of the TV beast. TV is NOT perfect (sorry Gracie) but it is hard to find anything much better.

My daughter worked retail and had more than her share of mean people. My advice to her was to have her imagine the mean people were in pain (either physically or mentally) and forgive them their bad behavior. Rather than become frustrated or take it personally, she began being extra nice and going the extra mile for them. Amazingly, several of these mean people went out of their way to tell her manager that she had made a very difficult day so much better because of simple acts of kindness.

[gomsiepop]

Being positive is contagious. Just keep doing what you're doing and you will only attract people like yourself. Good for you. Tell me what establishment you work in I want to come and say hi.

[TommyT]

Bet I know who would damage property, feel it doesn't matter and then leave the scene !!!! :ohdear:

[NotGolfer]

To Gerald...yes cars are to get us from one place to another BUT that doesn't excuse bumping them then leaving. If it didn't happen in a parking lot that would constitute leaving a scene of an accident and would constitute a fine/ticket from the police. It doesn't matter how hard of a day or life the person is having that did this. Just is wrong!!! I would have to ask you, Gerald, what planet do you live on?? How would you feel if it happened to you???

As for rude folks in retail (and in LIFE)...yes it happens. I used to work retail and found that "if" you 'kill them with kindness' it works best. Sometimes it will make them stop and see that they look like jerks...if not then you're the one who took the higher road. The jerks will stand out to look to others for what they are. Remember back in school the "Golden Rule"? Do onto others as you wish them to do onto you! I also like another analogy---what goes around, comes around....and this one can work both ways. Don't get discouraged...there are LOTS of good people out there as well.

[Happinow]

I think the service industry is a difficult one to work in. People come in with an attitude and leave with a bigger one. I worked it for more years than I can count. Just remember it's not you they are mad at. It's a circumstance they can't control so they vent, and you are the one they vent to. This happens everywhere and like others have said, at least you get to leave work, go home to a wonderful home and enjoy all that life has to offer in a beautiful place. Try to keep a good attitude and kill 'em with kindness. At least you'll know you did your job the best you could.

[Uptown Girl]

No question there are some rude and inconsiderate people here. However, there are also some of the nicest, kindest, friendliest people that live here. Working retail you're going to find some of the worst. Just the nature of the beast. Driving around TV in a golf cart, going to the squares and talking to others, participating in your favorite activities gives you a chance to find some of the best. Also the nature of the TV beast. TV is NOT perfect (sorry Gracie) but it is hard to find anything much better.

My daughter worked retail and had more than her share of mean people. My advice to her was to have her imagine the mean people were in pain (either physically or mentally) and forgive them their bad behavior. Rather than become frustrated or take it personally, she began being extra nice and going the extra mile for them. Amazingly, several of these mean people went out of their way to tell her manager that she had made a very difficult day so much better because of simple acts of kindness.

That's why I LIKE YOU Red, you are indeed a sage.

Dear original poster: I'd like to add that grace under pressure is worth the practice it takes. Your bonus is that each time you accomplish it, you become more beautiful.
Showing by example is a profound gift to the world... more than you can ever imagine. Don't fret if it appears to be wasted on some... that is not for your concern or your focus to be spent on.
Just keep up the "good work".... and Thank You for your efforts!
(hope your car can look beautiful again soon!)

[Gretch298]

Thanks to everyone and I shall remain in smile mode no matter what or who tries to get me down. Life is too short my friends to waste on the little things. I am lucky in so many ways.... As far as the dent in the car well it shall remain there to remind me that no matter who or what puts dents in my life I can smile and say "have a wonderful day" because I am on the other side of the grass this morning and for that I am thankful....:wave:

[Madelaine Amee]

I have lived in the Villages for 3 months now, what a wonderful place. I found a part time job that was a real eye opener. I have been treated like I have personally ruined your day because the store is out of your sale item. I smile and say I am sorry. I truely am sorry believe it or not. Last week when leaving my job I came out to a nasty dent in the side of my car. No one bothered to come in to the store to "look" for the owner of the car they hit. I hope they slept well that night, I didn't. I am your neighbor who smiles and says hello so when the lawn people come to do your lawn why do you allow them to park all over my lawn and block me in my driveway? I love it here and want to try hard to learn the ways but I think I am missing something? Any ideas?:wave:

You mention moving here just three months ago - unfortunately that would have brought you to The Villages at probably the worst time of the year. We are at capacity during January, February and March with seasonal owners and renters and our numbers swell to an almost impossible size and people get very testy about silly little things - It's rather like the experiments scientists have done with putting too many rats into too small a space, they end up eating their own! We are not quite at that point, but the year round residents are getting very close to that point!

Give it another two weeks and a good third or more of the people here will be on their way back to their primary homes up North and sanity will return to TV. Then in late May and early June the seasonal people will be gone and this heaven on earth will be ours, all ours, until about November when it will start all over again. You will be able to get into any restaurant without waiting in line, it's a pleasure to shop without being shoved and pushed, the driving gets far more relaxed - both golf cart and automobile, and we settle into the genteel southern way of living.

We have been full time residents for the past seven years and we love it, we love it more and more with each passing year and I am sure you will too once you have adjusted to the influx of winter visitors. I saw a great bumper sticker just last week "If they are called Snowbirds why can't we shoot them".

[westcoastsunshine]

A few years ago, one of my clients walked in and
asked me, "Are you always this happy?" She
did not ask this question with even a hint of humor.
I was kind of shocked at this response but replied,
"Yes...most of the time!"

My very first employer gave me 2 good pieces of
advice when dealing with clients:

1. If I have a fight with my boyfriend the night
before, park my attitude at the door before
I walk into work.

2. If people are mean to you, you are just the
convenient target. Usually, they are just angry
with some person or event in their personal life.

Please remember that it take a special person to work
in the service industry. YOU must be one of the
special ones. Keep smilin'.

WCS

[Mikeod]

Years ago, our medical group contracted with University of Phoenix to run training on patient interactions. They used members of their drama classes to pose as patients with bad attitudes, complaints, and just ornery. We were taped so we could critique our interaction with these "patients". The sessions were invaluable in adjusting our reaction to these people. If real patients complained about a provider's attitude or responses, the providers were required to re-take the training. If there were further, confirmed, complaints on the same provider, they were asked to take their skills elsewhere. (Patients were sent forms to be filled out after all their visits and returned anonymously to evaluate their their visit. We were required to maintain a 98% patient satisfaction rating.)

[The Village Girl]

And here I thought a car was a thing to move you from point A to B. Not something to worry about for a little dent. Things happen, I am sure that the person who accidently hit yor car didn't do it on purpose.
People everywere are some what up tight lately because of money. Then the fact that in the villages most people are a little older just tired. Forgetting that there are always two sides to things. we don't know what life and stress others are having. If you want to be in a place where you need to deal with the public then you have to accept that not everyone is perfect. A smile and sorry goes a long way for the majority. For some it just does not help. You just think about what they are missing. You can deside to be happy or sad. Let the little things go and amazing how the world looks better.

Would I be incorrect to say that you hit this car? Just a guess.... :wave:

[Here2Stay]

I have lived in the Villages for 3 months now, what a wonderful place. I found a part time job that was a real eye opener. I have been treated like I have personally ruined your day because the store is out of your sale item. I smile and say I am sorry. I truely am sorry believe it or not. Last week when leaving my job I came out to a nasty dent in the side of my car. No one bothered to come in to the store to "look" for the owner of the car they hit. I hope they slept well that night, I didn't. I am your neighbor who smiles and says hello so when the lawn people come to do your lawn why do you allow them to park all over my lawn and block me in my driveway? I love it here and want to try hard to learn the ways but I think I am missing something? Any ideas?:wave:

It' called the 'WORLD OF ME ME ME" Not all of us are ME ME ME, but yes, there are many not just here in the Villages, but everywhere. what happened...people just think life is all about them...and for those who get upset about a sale item out of stock....lord folks, get a life!

[lovsthosebigdogs]

I learned a wonderful lesson from my amazing father when I was a teenager. We were driving (he behind the wheel) and some guy zigzagged sharply in front of him, cut him off, then honked loudly and gave my dad the finger. I look at my dad to see his reaction to this and all my dad did was to say calmly, "Boy, HE must be having a really bad day!" That left me with a life lesson that I have used many times for myself and with my volatile special ed students. You just can't take most things in life personally- you'll live longer and be much happier if you don't. Thanks, Daddy.

[rubicon]

I learned a wonderful lesson from my amazing father when I was a teenager. We were driving (he behind the wheel) and some guy zigzagged sharply in front of him, cut him off, then honked loudly and gave my dad the finger. I look at my dad to see his reaction to this and all my dad did was to say calmly, "Boy, HE must be having a really bad day!" That left me with a life lesson that I have used many times for myself and with my volatile special ed students. You just can't take most things in life personally- you'll live longer and be much happier if you don't. Thanks, Daddy.

lovsthosebigdogs: You father had given you good counsel.

[Barefoot]

I saw a great bumper sticker just last week "If they are called Snowbirds why can't we shoot them".

Is this an example of being polite and nice, the topic of this thread.

[Skybo]

Is this an example of being polite and nice, the topic of this thread.

I agree Barefoot! That’s not a very “nice or polite” thing to say about your fellow NEIGHBORS and HOMEOWNERS. They may only live here part-time, but they are a vital part of this community. To be honest, during my short time here (about a year), the snow-birds and renters have been some of the friendliest folks I’ve met. While the increased traffic and crowds can be attributed to the seasonal residents, I have my doubts that they are to blame for the increased surliness. Just the opposite, I suspect.

[Barefoot]

I agree Barefoot! That’s not a very “nice or polite” thing to say about your fellow NEIGHBORS and HOMEOWNERS. They may only live here part-time, but they are a vital part of this community. To be honest, during my short time here (about a year), the snow-birds and renters have been some of the friendliest folks I’ve met. While the increased traffic and crowds can be attributed to the seasonal residents, I have my doubts that they are to blame for the increased surliness. Just the opposite, I suspect.

Thanks Skybo. We live in our TV home for six months every year, and we'd stay longer if US Immigration Laws permitted it. We've never rented our TV house out. We don't take living in The Bubble for granted and we're estatic every year when it comes time to come here. Seasonal Residents know the rules and don't like irresponsible drivers and accidents any more than frogs do. And we probably smile a lot because we're so darn grateful to be here.

[redwitch]

I love the snowbirds. As you said, Bare, they're grateful to be here. Most are smiling all of the time. They're happy to wait their turn. They participate in anything and everything.

Not only that, without them there would be no restaurants, stores or much of anything else during summer months. The businesses here make their money during snowbird season. It is what keeps them going for the rest of the year for us frogs to enjoy year-round. And let's not forget snowbirds pay amenity fees year round, not just when they're here.

So, a special thank you to snowbirds. Please keep coming down. Ditto snowflakes and renters. You are all a part of what makes TV special!

And, Gretch, love your attitude!!!!

[CaptJohn]

Redwitch, you make very good points (as usual).

It's kinda like my view of hurricanes: So you have one bad day out of the year. There are still 364 very good ones! :laugh:

[Barefoot]

I love the snowbirds. As you said, Bare, they're grateful to be here. Most are smiling all of the time. They're happy to wait their turn. They participate in anything and everything.
Not only that, without them there would be no restaurants, stores or much of anything else during summer months. The businesses here make their money during snowbird season. It is what keeps them going for the rest of the year for us frogs to enjoy year-round. And let's not forget snowbirds pay amenity fees year round, not just when they're here.
So, a special thank you to snowbirds. Please keep coming down. Ditto snowflakes and renters. You are all a part of what makes TV special!

And, Gretch, love your attitude!!!!

Redwitch, what a lovely post, you make my heart happy. :pepper2: Thanks so much!

[Pturner]

I love the snowbirds. As you said, Bare, they're grateful to be here. Most are smiling all of the time. They're happy to wait their turn. They participate in anything and everything.

Not only that, without them there would be no restaurants, stores or much of anything else during summer months. The businesses here make their money during snowbird season. It is what keeps them going for the rest of the year for us frogs to enjoy year-round. And let's not forget snowbirds pay amenity fees year round, not just when they're here.

So, a special thank you to snowbirds. Please keep coming down. Ditto snowflakes and renters. You are all a part of what makes TV special!

And, Gretch, love your attitude!!!!

Bravo, Red!

[CarGuys]

You mention moving here just three months ago - unfortunately that would have brought you to The Villages at probably the worst time of the year. We are at capacity during January, February and March with seasonal owners and renters and our numbers swell to an almost impossible size and people get very testy about silly little things - I saw a great bumper sticker just last week "If they are called Snowbirds why can't we shoot them".

I just left public education. Well the Governot helped with that. What 35 years ago was the best job I evey had is now a place where parents Administrators and students have free shots at ya!

I never told my teacher or principal to F-- Off .When a teacher called me about my son an daughter I listened. I never told then the teacher I was going to beat them up or sue them and don't bother calling her again!

So I understand your feelings. World is getting mean.

And we become Frogs this July. We have only know The Villages in Summer months. I guess Ruth and I are in for a HUGE learning experience next winter?

Do they issue hurt feeling forms . I have attched a Army version PDF. Maybe we can all use it.:024:

[paulandjean]

I just cannot believe there is some much"anti-snowbirds" feelings inthe villages right now.

[lanie1160]

Please keep being who you are, nice. I have a retail business and sometimes people are just not nice. Maybe they were raised in that environment and have lived that way for many years and that is just the way it is for them. Remember, it is not directed specifically at you. It is their makeup of their being. They are rough around the edges to their spouse, children, friends etc...

Keep smiling, enjoying life, The Villages, and your soul. I promise, YOU WILL sleep the best at night.



It is their makeup of their being::BigApplause:

[ssmith]

This thread is over a year old...brought back from the dead.

Interesting tho to wonder if the OP still feels this way.

[Villages PL]

Over the many years I have lived in the Villages, I've seen a few parking lot accidents . I saw a woman back into a man's car in front of Publix and she wasn't aware of it. He yelled for her to stop and she did but she claimed she didn't do it. Her bumper hit the side of his car and she just didn't feel anything.

I was talking to a lady friend at The Villages post office and a woman backed out of her parking space. And she kept backing and backing and backing. She went so far as to knock my friend down. She got out of the car and complained that we shouldn't have been there. Then while I was helping my friend to get up, the woman got back in her car and drove off.

Once when I went to Spanish Springs town square I parked in back of the Church. As I was about to get out of my car I saw a van try to get into a tight parking space. Pulling in at a poor angle, he misjudged and sideswiped the car that he was trying to park next to. He might have been drunk to be so unaware of it. But someone on the passenger side must have told him about it because he pulled out and took off without leaving a note.

Who knows what's going on in some people's minds. It talkes all kinds and people here are from all over the U.S..

[eweissenbach]

One of my "heroes " was Zig Ziglar, who was a motivational and sales trainer, but who taught a lot about life and particularly the value of a positive attitude. One story he told was about a man driving to work, when an elderly driver pulled out in front of him, causing him to slam on his brakes. A collision was averted, but the man began honking his horn and shaking his fist at the older man, screaming and cursing at him. The old man drove on and finally the younger man arrived at work, still livid, and loudly complained about the stupid old fart who almost caused him to wreck. Finally he got to his office and silently seethed with anger the rest of the morning, unable to concentrate on work. Meanwhile, the target for his anger, the elderly gentleman continued on with his day happily oblivious to any angst he may have caused. So the question is, who suffered? Who's day was ruined? Anger generally hurts the one harbors the anger far more than the person they are angry with.
Another story he told to illustrate the point was about him being in an airport for his return home after several speaking engagements. When he stepped into line to secure his boarding pass, the official at the counter got on the PA system and announced that the flight would be delayed for two hours because of mechanical issues. Zig said "Great, this will give mea chance to catch up on some reading, and an opportunity to explore this beautiful airport". Meanwhile another gentleman stormed to the desk and began yelling at the official, saying he had to get to his destination, and he paid good money for this ticket so that he could get there on time, and that this airline is incompetent and all their employees are idiots and on and on, and as Zig said slowly, "the flight was still two hours late." In other words you can make the best or the worst of any situation, itis really up to you.

[DougB]

Anne Murray - Snowbird 1973 - YouTube

► 1:56
Anne Murray - Snowbird 1973 - YouTube

[Warren Kiefer]

And here I thought a car was a thing to move you from point A to B. Not something to worry about for a little dent. Things happen, I am sure that the person who accidently hit yor car didn't do it on purpose.
People everywere are some what up tight lately because of money. Then the fact that in the villages most people are a little older just tired. Forgetting that there are always two sides to things. we don't know what life and stress others are having. If you want to be in a place where you need to deal with the public then you have to accept that not everyone is perfect. A smile and sorry goes a long way for the majority. For some it just does not help. You just think about what they are missing. You can deside to be happy or sad. Let the little things go and amazing how the world looks better.

I cannot believe this post.

[patfla06]

I'm beginning to wonder if these people watch too much trash t.v., see the fighting and overall bad behavior on those shows and think it's okay to act like that.

Either that or they just weren't raised right!