Taltarzac725
05-10-2012, 01:38 PM
A ball at rest on a steep slope will tend to remain at rest until the moment it is addressed.
A ball that looked stiff to the pin from back in the fairway will be ten feet from the hole when you get to the green.
A ball will always come to rest halfway down a slope unless there is sand or water at the bottom.
A ball will always seek the lowest point in which to lie so long as that point is not a perfectly round hole 4 1/2 inches in diameter and 4 inches deep.
A ball you can see in the rough from 50 yards away is not yours.
A ball you searched for for five minutes will be found in five seconds by a player in the first group behind you.
Before you drop a ball, always decide whether you're going for accuracy or distance.
If both balls are in the bunker, yours is in the footprint.
If there is a ball in the fringe and a ball in the bunker, your ball is in the bunker.
If you can't find your ball in the rough, but you do find another ball that you could easily play, it will be orange, yellow, or pink.
The ball hit into the rough will always disappear between two identical shrubs.
The ball will always travel farthest when hit in the wrong direction.
The ball will never lip out of a pot bunker or burn the edge of a pond.
The fewer balls you have, the more balls you lose; the more balls you have, the more balls you lose.
The harder you try to keep your ball from landing in a particular place, the more certain it is to go there.
The only sure way to find a drive sliced deep into the woods is to hit a provisional ball right down the middle of the fairway.
The only sure way to get a hole-in-one is to be playing terrible golf all by yourself on a course you sneaked onto without paying on a day when you called in sick.
The only sure way to hit a perfectly straight 250-yard drive is to decide not to go for it on a dogleg hole.
The only time you can put the ball exactly where you want it is when you stick it in the ballwasher.
You can draw the ball, you can fade the ball, but no one can straight the ball.
These are from an English website on golf jokes. Golfing Laws, Murphys Laws and Golf Truisms (http://www.golfjokes.co.uk/golfing_laws/swing_theory.html)
Another set of laws of golf-- The Laws of Golf (http://www.allowe.com/Humor/book/The%20Laws%20of%20Golf.htm)
And, yet another-- Golf Jokes - 25 Irrefutable Laws of Golf (http://www.orlandogolfblogger.com/2010/03/31/golf-jokes-25-irrefutable-laws-of-golf/)
A ball that looked stiff to the pin from back in the fairway will be ten feet from the hole when you get to the green.
A ball will always come to rest halfway down a slope unless there is sand or water at the bottom.
A ball will always seek the lowest point in which to lie so long as that point is not a perfectly round hole 4 1/2 inches in diameter and 4 inches deep.
A ball you can see in the rough from 50 yards away is not yours.
A ball you searched for for five minutes will be found in five seconds by a player in the first group behind you.
Before you drop a ball, always decide whether you're going for accuracy or distance.
If both balls are in the bunker, yours is in the footprint.
If there is a ball in the fringe and a ball in the bunker, your ball is in the bunker.
If you can't find your ball in the rough, but you do find another ball that you could easily play, it will be orange, yellow, or pink.
The ball hit into the rough will always disappear between two identical shrubs.
The ball will always travel farthest when hit in the wrong direction.
The ball will never lip out of a pot bunker or burn the edge of a pond.
The fewer balls you have, the more balls you lose; the more balls you have, the more balls you lose.
The harder you try to keep your ball from landing in a particular place, the more certain it is to go there.
The only sure way to find a drive sliced deep into the woods is to hit a provisional ball right down the middle of the fairway.
The only sure way to get a hole-in-one is to be playing terrible golf all by yourself on a course you sneaked onto without paying on a day when you called in sick.
The only sure way to hit a perfectly straight 250-yard drive is to decide not to go for it on a dogleg hole.
The only time you can put the ball exactly where you want it is when you stick it in the ballwasher.
You can draw the ball, you can fade the ball, but no one can straight the ball.
These are from an English website on golf jokes. Golfing Laws, Murphys Laws and Golf Truisms (http://www.golfjokes.co.uk/golfing_laws/swing_theory.html)
Another set of laws of golf-- The Laws of Golf (http://www.allowe.com/Humor/book/The%20Laws%20of%20Golf.htm)
And, yet another-- Golf Jokes - 25 Irrefutable Laws of Golf (http://www.orlandogolfblogger.com/2010/03/31/golf-jokes-25-irrefutable-laws-of-golf/)