The Rudeness Continues

[cappyjon431]

I know I have posted about this before, but it seems that the rude behavior in this area is not limited to our busy season.

I had an endoscopy scheduled at the TV hospital this morning at 9:30 AM. My wife had to drive me because they didn't want me driving home after the procedure. She drove me in her GEM car which is street legal. We were heading east on El Camino Real towards the hospital when a car got right on our tail and then laid on the horn. Just about scared my wife to death. Oh well, no big deal, the person must have been in a big hurry....

After the procedure they gave me a prescription. We dropped it off at Walgreens and were told that it would be an hour for pick up. Since I had to fast the night before I was famished so we went for a nice brunch at First Watch. We finished our lunch and it was not quite an hour so we figured we would go over to Lowe's and kill a little time and pick up some things for the garden.

So we waited almost two hours before going to pick up our prescription which was supposed to be picked up in an hour. We went to the drive thru pick-up lane and when we got to the window the pharmacist said it would be a few more minutes but that we should wait right there. So we did. We waited about five minutes (maybe a little longer).

After we paid and were getting ready to pull away the woman behind us laid on the horn and started yelling. My wife thought maybe our door was left open or the trunk was open. I said I would get out and see what was wrong. When I got out I couldn't find anything wrong with our vehicle so I looked at the woman who had honked and shrugged my shoulders. She honked again and yelled something I couln't understand. I walked towards her window to see what she wanted and she said "get in your golf cart and go on your way already." Apparently she was in a big hurry and was ticked off that the pharmacist took so long with our order (or she thought it was our fault because it took so long). I asked her why she had to be so rude? Why did she have to yell at us and lay on her horn? I told her it wasn't our fault. She gave me the finger. At this point I was ****ed. I had just had a procedure, I just wanted to pick up my medicine and go home. She said if I came any closer she would call 911. I said "go ahead and call 911 you rude b*tch." I think this kinda surprised her, and she said she would pray for me. I told her to pray for herself, because she wasn't being very Christian.

The rudeness continues...

[Sweetgirl]

I said "go ahead and call 911 you rude b*tch." I think this kinda surprised her, and she said she would pray for me. I told her to pray for herself, because she wasn't being very Christian.

The rudeness continues...

Cappy, I'm glad you were able to point out too her, 2 of her finer attributes. :clap2:

[janmcn]

Unbelievable. So much hatred coming from someone who calls herself a Christian.

[rubicon]

Pharmacists all around this area seem to be over worked. Clearly the individual behind you exhibited misplaced aggression...but then each of us would be better off channeling any aggression into something positive...like perhaps the woman behind you could have recited a prayer, a poem , a joke.

I hope you have better days ahead.

[billethkid]

and be reminded when you are chastising the event as attributable to "this area" it is NOT an attribute of THIS AREA as you improperly infer.

You happen to run into the exceptions and then proceed to announce the entire area as "rude" which is incorrect and inaccurate information.

Keep in mind the other 99++++% that is just fine and dandy and happy and courteous......Thank you very much!

btk

[njbchbum]

I know I have posted about this before, but it seems that the rude behavior in this area is not limited to our busy season.

I had an endoscopy scheduled at the TV hospital this morning at 9:30 AM. My wife had to drive me because they didn't want me driving home after the procedure. She drove me in her GEM car which is street legal. We were heading east on El Camino Real towards the hospital when a car got right on our tail and then laid on the horn. Just about scared my wife to death. Oh well, no big deal, the person must have been in a big hurry....

After the procedure they gave me a prescription. We dropped it off at Walgreens and were told that it would be an hour for pick up. Since I had to fast the night before I was famished so we went for a nice brunch at First Watc. We finished our lunch and it was not quite an hour so we figured we would go over to Lowes and kill a little time and pick up some things for the garden.

So we waited almost two hours before going to pick up our prescription which was supposed to be picked up in an hour. We went to the drive thru pick-up lane and when we got to the window the pharmacist said it would be a few more minutes but that we should wait right there. So we did. We waited about five minutes (maybe a little longer).

After we paid and were getting ready to pull away the woman behind us laid on the horn and started yelling. My wife thought maybe ourdoor was left open of the trunk was open. I said I would get out and see what was wrong. when I got out I couldn't find anything wrong with our vehicle so I looked at the woman who had honked and shrugged my shoulders. She honked again and yelled something I couln't understand. I walked towards her window to see what she wanted and she said "get in your golf cart and go on your way already." Apparently she was in a big hurry and was ticked off that the pharmacist took so long with our order (or she thought it was our fault because it took so long). I asked her why she had to be so rude? Why did she have to yell at us and lay on her horn? I told her it wasn't our fault. She gave me the finger. At this point I was ****ed. I had just had a procedure, I just wanted to pick up my medicine and go home. She said if I came any closer she would call 911. I said "go ahead and call 911 you rude b*tch." I think this kinda surprised her, and she said she would pray for me. I told her to pray for herself, because she wasn't being very Christian.

The rudeness continues...

so sorry that you had to endure what you did! something like that is not a good thing even when you have not had a procedure! guess we can be sure it wasn't a snowbird - and the f/t residents are taking up that slack! such a shame!

hope you are feeling better since the procedure and that all will be well from her on out.

[Taltarzac725]

Sorry to hear about your bad experiences. I have rarely heard any horn honking here in the Villages unless it is in jubiliation like during a Villages' parade, golf cart driving exhibition, or in some kind of greeting.

I do hear horn hooking in anger once in a while on the more heavily traveled highways that go through the Villages like 441/27 and CR466 and CR466a.

[Bogie Shooter]

and be reminded when you are chastising the event as attributable to "this area" it is NOT an attribute of THIS AREA as you improperly infer.

You happen to run into the exceptions and then proceed to announce the entire area as "rude" which is incorrect and inaccurate information.

Keep in mind the other 99++++% that is just fine and dandy and happy and courteous......Thank you very much!

btk

I agree! Incident painted with too broad a brush.

[Villageshooter]

i sometimes have rough days like this,,,, until my meds kick in, my wife worries i will try to baptize someone in the water aerobics class when they take my noodle... until my pills take effect. DONT let them get to you,, this is not a small town anymore, I am sure you have a wonderful bride, nice golf car,, and we have a nice life... my bride is concerned i will over medicate myself and come home with a new wife!

[shcisamax]

I am soooo sorry to hear this. I just got through telling people back home how nice it is being in a place where you never have to worry about someone giving you the finger...ugh...there is something very ugly about an adult...an older adult at that..giving the finger. I am sorry your day was filled with nasty rudeness.

[Mimivillager]

Handled well by you. I am proud of you.
Yesterday at Walmart we saw a guy leave his shopping cart in front of our car (I had already taken one to the cart barn on the way in the store). My hubby told him what a lazy jerk he was. He responded with all kinds of profanities at hubby. He was the one who was wrong but did not like being called on it.

[jimbo2012]

isn't it possible she wasn't even a village resident?

Either way it stinks she acted like that, just go home take nap after your procedure, relax.

But you were speaking with too broad a brush, 1 out of 90,000? :ohdear:

[cappyjon431]

and be reminded when you are chastising the event as attributable to "this area" it is NOT an attribute of THIS AREA as you improperly infer.

You happen to run into the exceptions and then proceed to announce the entire area as "rude" which is incorrect and inaccurate information.

Keep in mind the other 99++++% that is just fine and dandy and happy and courteous......Thank you very much!

btk

I've been around a few years. I've lived in major metro areas (Miami for most of my life, NYC for a little while) and tiny little Caribbean islands. I've traveled the world and I can say in MY OPINION that I have not seen the type of rudeness that I've seen IN THIS AREA. My point is, I've only been living here for six months and I have already seen more rudeness than I've seen in decades living in other places. I know Miami, Chicago, NY, Philly, etc. have reputations for rudeness and I am sure it is well deserved, but I've lived in/visited all of these places and I haven't seen this amount of rudeness in such a short amount of time.

Some of it seems to come from a sense of entitlement, but some certainly comes from a lack of proper upbringing. In this case, it seemed to stem from someone who had a deep seated resentment against TV residents (hence the "get into your golf cart annd move along" quote).

I should clarify, in the incident I posted above, this was clearly not a TV resident (I never claimed that it was, but the ever present TV Reputation Protection League thought it necessary to defend the reputation of "the area"), but someone who is probably suffering from the results of generations of inbreeding.

[cappyjon431]

isn't it possible she wasn't even a village resident?

Either way it stinks she acted like that, just go home take nap after your procedure, relax.

But you were speaking with too broad a brush, 1 out of 90,000? :ohdear:

I am pretty sure that it was NOT a TV resident. Please understand that I never said nor implied in my OP that it was. I have no vendetta against TV residents, but I sure hate rudeness in all of its shapes and forms.

I don't think it was too broad a brush, this was not 1 out of 90,000, but something I have seen a lot of since I moved here six months ago. Don't get me wrong, I love living here, but I am constantly surprised by how often I see this type of thing. This is not the first time I have posted about these types of behaviors.

[graciegirl]

Jon.

Go and rest. You have been given an amniasic. I am not downplaying what happened but I was told I couldn't sign anything legal on the day following the procedure. It did happen and it was rude but tommorrow the whole thing may not look the same.

It may look not as bad and it may look worse tomorrow, but the kick a poo joy juice will be out of your system entirely and you will be your usual self..

I hope you were given a clean bill of health.

You are a great guy.

[red tail]

I know I have posted about this before, but it seems that the rude behavior in this area is not limited to our busy season.

I had an endoscopy scheduled at the TV hospital this morning at 9:30 AM. My wife had to drive me because they didn't want me driving home after the procedure. She drove me in her GEM car which is street legal. We were heading east on El Camino Real towards the hospital when a car got right on our tail and then laid on the horn. Just about scared my wife to death. Oh well, no big deal, the person must have been in a big hurry....

After the procedure they gave me a prescription. We dropped it off at Walgreens and were told that it would be an hour for pick up. Since I had to fast the night before I was famished so we went for a nice brunch at First Watc. We finished our lunch and it was not quite an hour so we figured we would go over to Lowes and kill a little time and pick up some things for the garden.

So we waited almost two hours before going to pick up our prescription which was supposed to be picked up in an hour. We went to the drive thru pick-up lane and when we got to the window the pharmacist said it would be a few more minutes but that we should wait right there. So we did. We waited about five minutes (maybe a little longer).

After we paid and were getting ready to pull away the woman behind us laid on the horn and started yelling. My wife thought maybe ourdoor was left open of the trunk was open. I said I would get out and see what was wrong. when I got out I couldn't find anything wrong with our vehicle so I looked at the woman who had honked and shrugged my shoulders. She honked again and yelled something I couln't understand. I walked towards her window to see what she wanted and she said "get in your golf cart and go on your way already." Apparently she was in a big hurry and was ticked off that the pharmacist took so long with our order (or she thought it was our fault because it took so long). I asked her why she had to be so rude? Why did she have to yell at us and lay on her horn? I told her it wasn't our fault. She gave me the finger. At this point I was ****ed. I had just had a procedure, I just wanted to pick up my medicine and go home. She said if I came any closer she would call 911. I said "go ahead and call 911 you rude b*tch." I think this kinda surprised her, and she said she would pray for me. I told her to pray for herself, because she wasn't being very Christian.

The rudeness continues...

this might be the same woman you wanted to chase because she gave you the finger. you seem to have a lot of issues with women and road rage.

[cappyjon431]

Jon.

Go and rest. You have been given an amniasic. I am not downplaying what happened but I was told I couldn't sign anything legal on the day following the procedure. It did happen and it was rude but tommorrow the whole thing may not look the same.

It may look not as bad and it may look worse tomorrow, but the kick a poo joy juice will be out of your system entirely and you will be your usual self..

I hope you were given a clean bill of health.

You are a great guy.

Gracie, as usual you are 100% correct. I could use a nap and I am sure tomorrow will be a better day. My wife, on the other hand, was driving during both of today's incidents and she is seething (she's a red head and has the temper in the family).

[cappyjon431]

this might be the same woman you wanted to chase because she gave you the finger. you seem to have a lot of issues with women and road rage.

Oh, you must be referring to the last incident of RUDENESS I reported here on TOTV. The time where a woman almost killed us in the Barnes and Noble parking lot and then proceeded to give us the finger (even though she was the one who was legally at fault). As long as people are willing to condone bad behavior, it will continue.

I have no issues with women or road rage. I DO have issues with rude behavior, whether from males or females (I wouldn't use the word "women" when describing these offenders).

I would ask you to try to stay on the topic of the original post and TRY not to attack the person--try avoiding this misplaced aggression.

[wendyquat]

Captain Jon, you are not alone in your opinions! I have come to believe that this " rudeness" is accepted as "normal" in some regions, just not in the South where I was raised! Don't know what is "politically correct" but I try to brush it off and continue on my merry way! I love TV and the beauty, etc. more than make up for the occasional rudeness I find. They are not gonna ruin my day!

[jimbo2012]

I've only been living here for six months and I have already seen more rudeness than I've seen in decades living in other places. I know Miami, Chicago, NY, Philly, etc. have reputations for rudeness and I am sure it is well deserved, but I've lived in/visited all of these places and I haven't seen this amount of rudeness in such a short amount of time.

Come on Jon, you haven't seen this in NYC?

Not sure where that might be in NYC? :blahblahblah:

You need to let this crap roll off off your back and forget it, rather than hashing it over and over.

[cappyjon431]

Captain Jon, you are not alone in your opinions! I have come to believe that this " rudeness" is accepted as "normal" in some regions, just not in the South where I was raised! Don't know what is "politically correct" but I try to brush it off and continue on my merry way! I love TV and the beauty, etc. more than make up for the occasional rudeness I find. They are not gonna ruin my day!

Thank you Wendy. I am happy to see that others don't have their blinders on.

I agree with you and try not to let this rudeness deter me from living in and enjoying this wonderful place. I do occasionally like to report it on TOTV because I get a kick out of people defending what I consider really bad behavior.

[cappyjon431]

Come on Jon, you haven't seen this in NYC?

Not sure where that might be in NYC? :blahblahblah:

You need to let this crap roll off off your back and forget it, rather than hashing it over and over.

Jimbo,

Of course I've seen it in NYC. I expect it in NYC. My opinion (and I really didn't do a scientific strudy documenting and rating each incidence of rudeness), just based on my limited observations, is that there is a surprisingly high incidence of rudeness in this area, higher than i've seen in any other place i have lived for a six month period.

Where in NYC?: I lived in Battery Park for a little over a year and spent several summers as a young man living on E 93rd and Third Avenue (before it became a "nice" neighborhood).

[bluedog103]

Jimbo,

Of course I've seen it in NYC. I expect it in NYC. My opinion (and I really didn't do a scientific strudy documenting and rating each incidence of rudeness), just based on my limited observations, is that there is a surprisingly high incidence of rudeness in this area, higher than i've seen in any other place i have lived for a six month period.

Where in NYC?: I lived in Battery Park for a little over a year and spent several summers as a young man living on E 93rd and Third Avenue (before it became a "nice" neighborhood).
Where in Battery Park? The nearest real residential area to the park is Battery Park City, which is a bit north of the park on the Hudson. I can't think of a whole lot else in the area. It's mostly office buildings. I could be wrong though. I haven't worked in that area in a few years.
I agree with you about the rudeness in TV. It seems worse in TV than any place I've lived. I can't understand the attitude. In this incredible place you'd think people would be without a care in the world but that's just not the case. Face to face folks seem friendly enough but behind the wheel of a car or pushing a cart in the supermarket that friendly smile seems to disappear. Seems that there's a whole lot of anger out there.
Another question, again not being critical, how did you know she was a Christian?

[Wing-nut2]

Next time use your cell phone and take her picture. Post it. Let's take a look at some of these kind understanding people.

[cappyjon431]

Where in Battery Park? The nearest real residential area to the park is Battery Park City, which is a bit north of the park on the Hudson. I can't think of a whole lot else in the area. It's mostly office buildings. I could be wrong though. I haven't worked in that area in a few years.
I agree with you about the rudeness in TV. It seems worse in TV than any place I've lived. I can't understand the attitude. In this incredible place you'd think people would be without a care in the world but that's just not the case. Face to face folks seem friendly enough but behind the wheel of a car or pushing a cart in the supermarket that friendly smile seems to disappear. Seems that there's a whole lot of anger out there.
Another question, again not being critical, how did you know she was a Christian?

You are correct, it was Battery Park City--my grandfather's company owned a condo there called The Colonade in the early eighties (when I worked for him there) and I had the pleasure of living there (except when they had to fly a client in and then I got relegated to the crappy apartment on E. 93rd).

I seem to see most of the rudeness behind the wheel (especially parking lots), in grocery stores (watching the interactions at checkout lines is particularly amusing) and to a smaller extent, the town squares. I also see lots of cell phone use/talking during movies at Old Mill and the Rialto, but that is another thread entirely. I have yet to see it at the rec centers, at the pools, or at the gym (maybe exercise diminishes rudeness/aggrssion?).

My wife, who is a nurse at the TV Hospital ER (and has worked at major metro ERs in Miami and Ft. Lauderdale) sees rudeness almost every night she works and says it is worse here than anywhere she has ever worked (in 20+ years as an ER nurse). Once again, please understand I am NOT saying these are all TV residents, many of the ones in the hospital are not.

I probably should not have assumed she was a Christian, bit i did because:

1. She said "Ill pray for you" during our interaction (I'm Jewish and we just don't say that to folks).

2. The curucifix hanging from her rearview led me to make an assumption.

[cappyjon431]

Next time use your cell phone and take her picture. Post it. Let's take a look at some of these kind understanding people.

What a great idea! Funny you should write that, I just got my first camera eqipped cell phone yesterday. Once I figure out how it works, I might give it a try.

[quirky3]

IMHO, most posters just want to share their experience or opinion because it could help other posters, or they may want to know who else has had similar experiences, or they want to share this on TOTV as part of their personal TV experience.

"Active listening" seems like a very constructive response - I hear what you're saying, thank you for sharing and caring enough to share.

What seems strange, and discouraging to me is when people make it about the poster and not the posted topic. They question their "credentials" for posting such a thing, or dismiss or minimize the person's experience, especially when it does not reflect a popular or majority view.

I hope that posters, including new posters, keep sharing and caring in spite of that.

[cappyjon431]

IMHO, most posters just want to share their experience or opinion because it could help other posters, or they may want to know who else has had similar experiences, or they want to share this on TOTV as part of their personal TV experience.

"Active listening" seems like a very constructive response - I hear what you're saying, thank you for sharing and caring enough to share.

What seems strange, and discouraging to me is when people make it about the poster and not the posted topic. They question their "credentials" for posting such a thing, or dismiss or minimize the person's experience, especially when it does not reflect a popular or majority view.

I hope that posters, including new posters, keep sharing and caring in spite of that.

Bravo

:bigbow:

[Barefoot]

I know I have posted about this before, but it seems that the rude behavior in this area is not limited to our busy season.

I'm not happy that you encountered a rude and impatient driver. Especially after having a colonoscopy, which isn't on anyone's bucket list.

But I am happy that the rude behaviour isn't being blamed on snow birds! :icon_wink:

[Finallyfree]

Hey folks, if someone being rude is the worst thing that happens on any given day, it is a wonderful day. Rudeness may not be nice but it won't kill anyone and think how miserable a rude person must be to be angry all the ime. Enjoy life, it is too short! Just call me Pollyanna.

[cappyjon431]

I'm not happy that you encountered a rude and impatient driver. Especially after having a colonoscopy, which isn't on anyone's bucket list.

But I am happy that the rude behaviour isn't being blamed on snow birds! :icon_wink:

Actually an endoscopy, but it's never a fun experience to go under anesthesia.

There are rude frogs, rude snowbirds, rude snowflakes, rude renters, and rude non-TV residents (who live and work in the area),

BUT

There are also extraordinarily friendly and polite frogs, snowbirds, snowflakes, renters, and non-TV residents.

I am happy to see that you and others were intelligent enough to see that I wasn't attacking snowbirds, or TV residents, etc. but merely voicing my displeasure at rude behavior I have seen here.

[duffysmom]

CappyJon over the course of a few month I've read that you've been dealing with health issues and you have my total respect in regard to the way you've been dealing with these issues. When people are rude to me on the road I blow them a big kiss and that really rattles their cage.:ohdear:

In any confrontation I'm cautious because many people here in Florida are armed and quick to respond in anger. Some people do not age well, what was an annoying character defect while younger can become serious flaws as they age.

IMHO, most posters just want to share their experience or opinion because it could help other posters, or they may want to know who else has had similar experiences, or they want to share this on TOTV as part of their personal TV experience.

"Active listening" seems like a very constructive response - I hear what you're saying, thank you for sharing and caring enough to share.

What seems strange, and discouraging to me is when people make it about the poster and not the posted topic. They question their "credentials" for posting such a thing, or dismiss or minimize the person's experience, especially when it does not reflect a popular or majority view.

I hope that posters, including new posters, keep sharing and caring in spite of that.

quirky, beautifully said. Unfortunately they do like to hide behind their anonymity and take shots at people. Sad way to live in paradise. :blahblahblah:

[graciegirl]

If you are kind you can't seem to stop acting that way.

If you are mean there may be something troubling happening.

But good manners are drilled into you when you are very young.

Honking at people is what you do to say hi where I was raised and not an act of impatience.

We can talk about it until the cows come home. There are differences in how we act and what we expect from others depending on what we have grown to expect.


There are no easy answers. Happiness usually engenders happy behavior.

My sweetie says that having the last word is just the same as entering a ****ing contest. No one ever wins.

[cappyjon431]

CappyJon over the course of a few month I've read that you've been dealing with health issues and you have my total respect in regard to the way you've been dealing with these issues. When people are rude to me on the road I blow them a big kiss and that really rattles their cage.:ohdear:

In any confrontation I'm cautious because many people here in Florida are armed and quick to respond in anger. Some people do not age well, what was an annoying character defect while younger can become serious flaws as they age.



quirky, beautifully said. Unfortunately they do like to hide behind their anonymity and take shots at people. Sad way to live in paradise. :blahblahblah:

Thank you for your kind words Duffysmom, they are appreciated. For most of my life I have always been a laid back, "kill 'em with kindness" type of lad and to this day that is how I try to live my life. To be honest, I seem to be starting to resent what I perceive as an increase in rudeness in the people around me and it deeply saddens me and probably explains why I am less tolerant of poor behavior than I once was.

Let me emphasize again that this cretin was probably not a TV resident and certainly was not an older person (probably 30s) so her bad behavior was probably not a result of not aging well.

I'm a native Floridian (a Miamian) so I am well aware of the risks of confrontation. Road rage is a way of life in Miami and it is one of the reasons we moved to the Caribbean. That being said, I am a man of principle and I believe in standing up for what is right, and I feel if we turn a blind eye to this type of behavior, we are in a sense condoning it.

When people on TOTV are critical of my posts on TOTV concerning this issue, I frequently ask myself how the other poster would feel/react if this type of rude behavior was aimed at one of their loved ones--their spouse, their mother, or their daughter. I would be interested in their responses.

[Indydealmaker]

Jon, you are not wrong.

This type of behavior is more noticeable. I, too, have noticed a pronounced level of impatience and rudeness in this area. Drivers are really a piece of work! My wife and her friends have commented repeatedly about this kind of behavior in the Publix and Fresh Market by those that appear to act as if they are "special" so that they can cut in line without taking a number etc.

I do not think that this behavior has anything to do with The Villages or with the Villagers. However, it does have to do with an unusual concentration of seniors that are all, in one way or another, distracted by their own problems. At a certain age, we are all less able to keep all of the "balls in the air". Too many start bouncing and it is as irritating as hell. Sometimes this frustration boils over.

This happens everywhere all the time, but here there is an unusual concentration of seniors, in a small area, reacting to inconvenience and/or perceived inconvenience much more aggressively than they historically might have.

Also, because of this senior demographic, there is noticeable resentment by "youngers" against "oldsters".

It is not The Villagers. It is just concentrated "life" smacking us in the face.

[cappyjon431]

Jon, you are not wrong.

This type of behavior is more noticeable. I, too, have noticed a pronounced level of impatience and rudeness in this area. Drivers are really a piece of work! My wife and her friends have commented repeatedly about this kind of behavior in the Publix and Fresh Market by those that appear to act as if they are "special" so that they can cut in line without taking a number etc.

I do not think that this behavior has anything to do with The Villages or with the Villagers. However, it does have to do with an unusual concentration of seniors that are all, in one way or another, distracted by their own problems. At a certain age, we are all less able to keep all of the "balls in the air". Too many start bouncing and it is as irritating as hell. Sometimes this frustration boils over.

This happens everywhere all the time, but here there is an unusual concentration of seniors, in a small area, reacting to inconvenience and/or perceived inconvenience much more aggressively than they historically might have.

Also, because of this senior demographic, there is noticeable resentment by "youngers" against "oldsters".

It is not The Villagers. It is just concentrated "life" smacking us in the face.

Very well thought out and written. I am especially glad that you included your last sentence, because this seems to be what I was seeing today at Walgreens.

[CarGuys]

The last time a woman in a car gave me/us the finger I looked over at her and started shaking my head up and down stating OK !

You guys figure out the rest. My wife told the woman are you really sure?

She burned tires away from us. Guess she didn't mean it.

[missypie]

The last time a woman in a car gave me/us the finger I looked over at her and started shaking my head up and down stating OK !

You guys figure out the rest. My wife told the woman are you really sure?

She burned tires away from us. Guess she didn't mean it.

That is hilarious

[Barefoot]

Jon, you are not wrong.

This type of behavior is more noticeable. I, too, have noticed a pronounced level of impatience and rudeness in this area. Drivers are really a piece of work! My wife and her friends have commented repeatedly about this kind of behavior in the Publix and Fresh Market by those that appear to act as if they are "special" so that they can cut in line without taking a number etc.

I do not think that this behavior has anything to do with The Villages or with the Villagers. However, it does have to do with an unusual concentration of seniors that are all, in one way or another, distracted by their own problems. At a certain age, we are all less able to keep all of the "balls in the air". Too many start bouncing and it is as irritating as hell. Sometimes this frustration boils over.

This happens everywhere all the time, but here there is an unusual concentration of seniors, in a small area, reacting to inconvenience and/or perceived inconvenience much more aggressively than they historically might have.

Also, because of this senior demographic, there is noticeable resentment by "youngers" against "oldsters".

It is not The Villagers. It is just concentrated "life" smacking us in the face.

I think there is a lot of truth in what you say. Thanks for taking the time to post your insightful comments.

[wendyquat]

:a20::a20::a20::a20:The last time a woman in a car gave me/us the finger I looked over at her and started shaking my head up and down stating OK !

You guys figure out the rest. My wife told the woman are you really sure?

She burned tires away from us. Guess she didn't mean it.

:BigApplause::a20::a20::a20:

[Penguin]

Does anyone remember in the movie "Its a wonderful life" when George Bailey yelled at his kids teacher on the phone? Then he ran into the teachers husband at a bar, the husband recognized George and punched him in the mouth. I miss those days.

[senior citizen]

...

[Golfer in Sanibel]

In USAToday, today. Look at the Florida cities in top 10.

Rudest city in the USA? Hint: It's not what you're probably thinking - USATODAY.com (http://travel.usatoday.com/destinations/dispatches/post/2011/01/what-is-the-rudest-city-the-usa-hint-its-not-what-youre-probably-thinking/139660/1?csp=tf)

[CaptJohn]

If you are kind you can't seem to stop acting that way.

If you are mean there may be something troubling happening.

But good manners are drilled into you when you are very young.

Honking at people is what you do to say hi where I was raised and not an act of impatience.

We can talk about it until the cows come home. There are differences in how we act and what we expect from others depending on what we have grown to expect.


There are no easy answers. Happiness usually engenders happy behavior.

My sweetie says that having the last word is just the same as entering a ****ing contest. No one ever wins.

Well put, Gracie. Bears repeating. I was raised the same as you but 752 miles away!. :smiley:

Of course, honking has changed. Now it is used to notify people the red light has changed to green when they are so engrossed in their text messaging that they don't realize why they're sitting behind the wheel a minute later (some honk a little quicker!). Not all are texting though, as some are reading, talking on the phone, changing the cd or diapers (had to get this in for Bill's benefit), picking things off the floor of the passenger seat, putting on makeup or just daydreaming. I get the biggest laugh when I'm first in line at the light, leave it promptly when it changes to green and then look in the mirror and see the person behind me 1/4 mile still hasn't noticed I've left! Life is busy!

[Here2Stay]

So SAD, but SO TRUE, that so many people think that they are the ONLY people in the world. For the life of me, I can't understand such RUDE folks, and I see it everyday...what is up with you RUDE FOLKS! Gosh, at this stage of your life folks, it is really how you wish to live.

RUDE PEOPLE:mad:

GOOD PEOPLE:angel:

TAKE YOUR PICK ON WHO YOU WILL BE TODAY!
AND SEE THE WORLD OF DIFFERENCE IN YOUR LIFE

[justjim]

When I come into contact with what I consider a "rude person" (and we all have a different tolerance) I sometimes pick back up that little book "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff and Its All Small Stuff." Just a thought.

[schotzyb]

The way I feel about it.

[mamagator]

You encounter rude people everyday, unfortunately! I try to ignore most of them. I'm also a Miami native, lived there most of my life. It use to be a very lovely city. We left there in the early '80's thanks to Fidel and his boatloads of criminals and lowlifes he sent over. I wouldn't move back there for a million $$! Talk about rude....I'm surprised Miami isn't at the top of the list!

[gmcneill]

I begin by saying that I am sorry to hear that you had to endure an endoscopy, Jon. I hope that the procedure uncovered the results that you were hoping for. Please continue to hang in there, Jon. I know you've had a rough go of things this year. Just know that there are many of us out here who are pulling for you and hold you in our thoughts and prayers.

FWIW: I have neither met nor spoken with Jon or his wife. I wouldn't know him if he ran me over with his paddleboard. ;) But how uplifting it would have been for Jon if we all- whether we know him or not- had taken a moment to extend the basic courtesy of offering some words of encouragement and support before expressing our opinions on the topic he raised?

On to the topic at hand…
Last summer, things on TOTV had descended to the point where we learned about trolls and cyber-bullies, we were admonished by the Administrator, and a long-standing member shut down. At the time, I thought that “we” committed to return to civility and mutual respect, and to focus our comments, whether positive or negative, on topics rather than directing criticisms or harsh comments at a poster. Things seemed to smooth over for a while. The long-time poster even returned, albeit if only with a limited less edgy presence.

A month or so ago, however, things got ugly again. That situation resulted in the self-imposed departures of another two members. (A welcome back greeting to one of them; a come-on back request to the other.)

Just this past week, a post commented about boorish behavior in TV church parking lots after services. One can read TOTV posts and see how quickly some of us become confrontational and antagonistic, demonstrating aggression- either outright or passively- towards a fellow poster instead of addressing the subject matter. We have seen where some posters, knowing that their comments and opinions will be a bit controversial, will include in their post an acknowledgement to the effect of, let the flaming begin.

Poor behavior is everywhere, inside and outside of the bubble; however, I do not understand why one would initiate rudeness and impoliteness. (I do agree with the point made elsewhere that there are people who are of a gentle nature in person but who are quite different in front of a keyboard or behind the wheel of a car, or a golf cart!) Posters in this string have identified many interesting and valid opinions and observations as potential reasons or causes for such behavior. I add another observation: Having endured decades of life’s stressors as best as they can, many folks who have reached retirement have committed to a personal life “guide” that they simply will not tolerate any person- or comment or place or circumstance- that displeases them in some way (Twisted Sister lyrics are running through my head!).

Some folks choose to ignore poor behavior, others choose to have fun with it- carguys, she shouldn’t have made an offer if she had no intention of fulfilling, such a tease she was!- while others choose a more aggressive approach. Folks who choose a more aggressive approach often not care that their level of aggression equals or exceeds in intensity whatever it is that “bothers” them, and they are usually callous about what others may think of their particular method for “rectifying” a matter.

As for me, I reiterate the pledge I made during last summer’s TOTV silliness: I choose to be as civil, polite, and mannerly as I possibly can. And when I fail, I will unconditionally apologize.

[Dr Winston O Boogie jr]

Sorry to hear that you had such a bad time. I tend to agree that this behavior is the exception and not the norm in the Villages. I have never had anyone honk at me while in my golf cart. In fact, I am surprised to see how courteous car drivers are to golf cart drivers.
One thing I would like to point out here, and this in no way excuses this woman's behavior, is that the pharmacist was somewhat to blame in this instance. He never should have told you to sit there and wait if it was going to take longer than a minute. He should have asked you to get out of line to allow the next customer to conduct their business.

[rubicon]

In USAToday, today. Look at the Florida cities in top 10.

Rudest city in the USA? Hint: It's not what you're probably thinking - USATODAY.com (http://travel.usatoday.com/destinations/dispatches/post/2011/01/what-is-the-rudest-city-the-usa-hint-its-not-what-youre-probably-thinking/139660/1?csp=tf)

The cities listed all have international vistor or are transient in nature so how can you tell?

[keithwand]

We have lived in Orlando since 2004 and find the people friendlyand helpful.
When I changed cars I tried to update my Sunpass online but ended up calling.
Got a wonderful lady that said well honey I can do this for you.
O town city employees are friendly and the DMV was too.
Now comparing it to Michigan; well the southern charm is true.

[Dirigo]

In any confrontation I'm cautious because many people here in Florida are armed and quick to respond in anger.

Really? Is there a higher percentage of armed persons in Florida compared to the rest of the country? And are they really more apt to use those arms in anger?

[John_W]

Concealed weapons permits are fairly easy to get in Florida when compared to other states. I came from Maryland and you had to prove it was necessary for you to have a concealed weapon, such as a business owner who carried large sums of money. In Florida if you have a military DD214 form, which is your service record, and a clean criminal record you can get a permit. I just checked online and as of last June there were 843,463 licensed permit holders in Florida.

[Bogie Shooter]

Concealed weapons permits are fairly easy to get in Florida when compared to other states. I came from Maryland and you had to prove it was necessary for you to have a concealed weapon, such as a business owner who carried large sums of money. In Florida if you have a military DD214 form, which is your service record, and a clean criminal record you can get a permit. I just checked online and as of last June there were 843,463 licensed permit holders in Florida.

Was there any information where you checked as to how many permit holders were mentally impaired??

[Trish Crocker]

My husband (the scientist:)) told me that the shortest recorded measure of time is the time between when the light turns green and the guy behind you blows his horn.

[Pturner]

My husband (the scientist:)) told me that the shortest recorded measure of time is the time between when the light turns green and the guy behind you blows his horn.

LOL. I've discovered that's the second shortest recorded time though. The first shortest by far is how fast the time goes whenever I'm in TV. :cryin2:

[cappyjon431]

I begin by saying that I am sorry to hear that you had to endure an endoscopy, Jon. I hope that the procedure uncovered the results that you were hoping for. Please continue to hang in there, Jon. I know you've had a rough go of things this year. Just know that there are many of us out here who are pulling for you and hold you in our thoughts and prayers.

FWIW: I have neither met nor spoken with Jon or his wife. I wouldn't know him if he ran me over with his paddleboard. ;) But how uplifting it would have been for Jon if we all- whether we know him or not- had taken a moment to extend the basic courtesy of offering some words of encouragement and support before expressing our opinions on the topic he raised?

On to the topic at hand…
Last summer, things on TOTV had descended to the point where we learned about trolls and cyber-bullies, we were admonished by the Administrator, and a long-standing member shut down. At the time, I thought that “we” committed to return to civility and mutual respect, and to focus our comments, whether positive or negative, on topics rather than directing criticisms or harsh comments at a poster. Things seemed to smooth over for a while. The long-time poster even returned, albeit if only with a limited less edgy presence.

A month or so ago, however, things got ugly again. That situation resulted in the self-imposed departures of another two members. (A welcome back greeting to one of them; a come-on back request to the other.)

Just this past week, a post commented about boorish behavior in TV church parking lots after services. One can read TOTV posts and see how quickly some of us become confrontational and antagonistic, demonstrating aggression- either outright or passively- towards a fellow poster instead of addressing the subject matter. We have seen where some posters, knowing that their comments and opinions will be a bit controversial, will include in their post an acknowledgement to the effect of, let the flaming begin.

Poor behavior is everywhere, inside and outside of the bubble; however, I do not understand why one would initiate rudeness and impoliteness. (I do agree with the point made elsewhere that there are people who are of a gentle nature in person but who are quite different in front of a keyboard or behind the wheel of a car, or a golf cart!) Posters in this string have identified many interesting and valid opinions and observations as potential reasons or causes for such behavior. I add another observation: Having endured decades of life’s stressors as best as they can, many folks who have reached retirement have committed to a personal life “guide” that they simply will not tolerate any person- or comment or place or circumstance- that displeases them in some way (Twisted Sister lyrics are running through my head!).

Some folks choose to ignore poor behavior, others choose to have fun with it- carguys, she shouldn’t have made an offer if she had no intention of fulfilling, such a tease she was!- while others choose a more aggressive approach. Folks who choose a more aggressive approach often not care that their level of aggression equals or exceeds in intensity whatever it is that “bothers” them, and they are usually callous about what others may think of their particular method for “rectifying” a matter.

As for me, I reiterate the pledge I made during last summer’s TOTV silliness: I choose to be as civil, polite, and mannerly as I possibly can. And when I fail, I will unconditionally apologize.

Thanks gmcneil for the kind words. I am truly touched. I'm actually doing very well and feel better than I have in years. The meds have kept me symptom free for a couple of months, they're trying to shock it into remission with high doses of prednisone. In the mean time I'm working out 5-6 days a week, paddleboarding a couple of times per week, and have done a few dive trips in the last month. I refuse to let this condition set me back.

I think you are correct in that rudeness can be found everywhere--big cities, small towns, among the young, among the old, in parking lots, grocery stores, movie theatres, even churches. It even occurs in cyberspace as we have seen on certain TOTV threads, including this one.

I think everyone just needs to try and combat rudeness in their own way. If people feel more comfortable "turning the other cheek," it is their decision and I respect that. If others want to combat it with humor, I think that is a wonderful approach. If someone wants to stand up to these rude bullies and confront them, that is good too. I certainly respect how anyone deals with rudeness--it is entirely their decision and they have to live with it. I just wish others would respect my method for combatting rudeness the way I respect theirs.

[Golfer in Sanibel]

My husband (the scientist:)) told me that the shortest recorded measure of time is the time between when the light turns green and the guy behind you blows his horn.

That is my definition of the nanosecond. :wave:

[Dirigo]

Was there any information where you checked as to how many permit holders were mentally impaired??

If you were to pick up an application for concealed carry at the tag office and read it you'd see that individuals are screened for any history of past violence or mental illness. Fingerprints are required also for positive ID.

I wonder if there is a higher percentage of CC permits compared to the total population in Florida compared to the other states...a project for me after I retire I guess.

[Posh 08]

If you were to pick up an application for concealed carry at the tag office and read it you'd see that individuals are screened for any history of past violence or mental illness. Fingerprints are required also for positive ID.

I wonder if there is a higher percentage of CC permits compared to the total population in Florida compared to the other states...a project for me after I retire I guess.

Wonder how many folks pack without a permit? One never knows.

[ladydoc]

I know I have posted about this before, but it seems that the rude behavior in this area is not limited to our busy season.

I had an endoscopy scheduled at the TV hospital this morning at 9:30 AM. My wife had to drive me because they didn't want me driving home after the procedure. She drove me in her GEM car which is street legal. We were heading east on El Camino Real towards the hospital when a car got right on our tail and then laid on the horn. Just about scared my wife to death. Oh well, no big deal, the person must have been in a big hurry....

After the procedure they gave me a prescription. We dropped it off at Walgreens and were told that it would be an hour for pick up. Since I had to fast the night before I was famished so we went for a nice brunch at First Watch. We finished our lunch and it was not quite an hour so we figured we would go over to Lowe's and kill a little time and pick up some things for the garden.

So we waited almost two hours before going to pick up our prescription which was supposed to be picked up in an hour. We went to the drive thru pick-up lane and when we got to the window the pharmacist said it would be a few more minutes but that we should wait right there. So we did. We waited about five minutes (maybe a little longer).

After we paid and were getting ready to pull away the woman behind us laid on the horn and started yelling. My wife thought maybe our door was left open or the trunk was open. I said I would get out and see what was wrong. When I got out I couldn't find anything wrong with our vehicle so I looked at the woman who had honked and shrugged my shoulders. She honked again and yelled something I couln't understand. I walked towards her window to see what she wanted and she said "get in your golf cart and go on your way already." Apparently she was in a big hurry and was ticked off that the pharmacist took so long with our order (or she thought it was our fault because it took so long). I asked her why she had to be so rude? Why did she have to yell at us and lay on her horn? I told her it wasn't our fault. She gave me the finger. At this point I was ****ed. I had just had a procedure, I just wanted to pick up my medicine and go home. She said if I came any closer she would call 911. I said "go ahead and call 911 you rude b*tch." I think this kinda surprised her, and she said she would pray for me. I told her to pray for herself, because she wasn't being very Christian.

The rudeness continues...

OMG...that is awful. I have run into people like that as well. I think you showed great restraint in dealing with her. I don't know what the hurry is...she should have gone into the store if she was in such a hurry.

I don't understand the level of rudeness around here. We are all so lucky to be here in this community....I guess some people just fell like they are entitled. What goes around comes around.

On the other hand, there are the very kind folks. The crate I have my glass tools and supplies in flew out of my cart on a turn, right as I got into a tunnel. So there I am, right at the entrance of the tunnel where I was afraid the cart would not be seen and someone was going to hit me. I moved it up a bit and then went to unhook my walker to go get it when a gentle riding a bike stopped, got my cart, made sure I was ok and left. God bless him.,,he really saved me from what could have been a real bad time. Let's hope people like him are in the majority. I believe they are....

[ilovetv]

We've seen 100 times more kind, courteous, accommodating people here in TV than the rude woman described in the original post. I think this thread has gone too far toward generalizing that the whole community is full of rude ba*****ds.

This community as a whole is no more rude than any other place in which we've lived.

And as for the comment about one's hometown of 16,000 where there is no such rudeness and people know everyone from cradle to grave, what I'd say is this: My experience with small town life (I grew up in it) is that yes, everyone knows you and knows every last tidbit of gossip about you that could possibly be known......and it gets spread behind your back! "Rudeness" comes in many forms.

I'd rather have somebody yell their complaint about me and I then know where they stand, over having the whole town gossiping and condemning me behind my back for something I didn't even realize p*ssed somebody off.

I think phony niceness while being a backstabber is the height of "rudeness".

Here in TV, 99% of nice people I've met and dealt with are genuinely nice.

[mac9]

Not wanting to make this thread any longer, but I believe that I notice the rudeness here more than when I lived "up north" because people seem to be so much more polite here. When someone acts like a jerk, I think that it shocks me and stands out more in my mind. I remember when I first moved here, I was checking out in Publix and the cashier took a look at my carton of eggs and told me that she couldn't sell me the eggs. I immediately did my "up north" stare and squared my shoulders ready for the duel. She then continued to tell me that there was a cracked egg in the carton and that she would have someone go back and get me a new carton!
I just try to shrug it off and figure that the rude one is just an unhappy so and so and I will not allow it to change my day.

[senior citizen]

...

[duffysmom]

This is not a hijack but I do have something to say regarding rude and hostile people. Senior Citizen, first off I do enjoy your notes they are honest, thoughtful and forthright. You have been blessed to raise your children in a beautiful small town in Vermont, but now as you mentioned the Winters are becoming difficult. That was my reason for moving to Florida and I've been blessed to live in South Florida as well central Florida these last few years. I've found that people are people, some good and some bad but living in TV has been like finding Utopia for me because of the people as well as the beautiful surroundings and most of all the LIGHT. The gorgeous sunlight each day during the Winter months helps me to keep a positive attitude and actually keeps me healthy. I do wish you would spend time here; we need people like you and your family; there is room for a few more Yankees here in the deep South.:wave:

[graciegirl]

This is not a hijack but I do have something to say regarding rude and hostile people. Senior Citizen, first off I do enjoy your notes they are honest, thoughtful and forthright. You have been blessed to raise your children in a beautiful small town in Vermont, but now as you mentioned the Winters are becoming difficult. That was my reason for moving to Florida and I've been blessed to live in South Florida as well central Florida these last few years. I've found that people are people, some good and some bad but living in TV has been like finding Utopia for me because of the people as well as the beautiful surroundings and most of all the LIGHT. The gorgeous sunlight each day during the Winter months helps me to keep a positive attitude and actually keeps me healthy. I do wish you would spend time here; we need people like you and your family; there is room for a few more Yankees here in the deep South.:wave:

I dearly love you Duffy's Mom.

[senior citizen]

...

[bluedog103]

And as for the comment about one's hometown of 16,000 where there is no such rudeness and people know everyone from cradle to grave, what I'd say is this: My experience with small town life (I grew up in it) is that yes, everyone knows you and knows every last tidbit of gossip about you that could possibly be known......and it gets spread behind your back! "Rudeness" comes in many forms.
ilovetv, we've lived in small communities of less than 1000 and in cites of several million. In my experience folks are folks. Even the cities are divided into small neighborhoods. These neighborhoods might have several thousand residents but they're often just as close as the small towns. In all those places I have yet to see one where gossip travels faster than in our neighborhood in TV. That's not a negative. These same neighbors who gossip at the pool, mail station and on the golf courses are also the ones who will be there to help you when you need a hand. That's just living in a community. You can't escape that. No matter where we've lived, most people are very nice. In some areas they are more friendly than others but basically they are good, decent people. I still say that something happens in TV when people are driving or in a supermarket. There seems to be a lot of well controlled anger which comes out, in these situations especially. I notice this more in TV more than any place we've lived.

[annaconner]

Was it because I was a woman that I was told to "shut up" when I drew a "gentleman's" !!!!
attention to the fact that he was going the wrong way in a lane at Publix Southern Trace. He will know who he is.

[buggyone]

A person responds to a thread from TWO YEARS ago?

If the poster from today had a current issue, start a NEW thread!

[CFrance]

A person responds to a thread from TWO YEARS ago?

If the poster from today had a current issue, start a NEW thread!
Now Buggy... sometimes new people forget to look at the posting dates... chilout

[mixsonci]

and be reminded when you are chastising the event as attributable to "this area" it is NOT an attribute of THIS AREA as you improperly infer.

You happen to run into the exceptions and then proceed to announce the entire area as "rude" which is incorrect and inaccurate information.

Keep in mind the other 99++++% that is just fine and dandy and happy and courteous......Thank you very much!

btk

To relate a very nice, courteous encounter I had. When my mom and I visited in December, we rented a Patio Villa with a Golf Cart. At the end of our visit we had to go fill the golf cart with gas. I had no idea how to do that, so we drove to the gas station and I saw a couple in another golf cart driving in to get his gas. I pulled in behind him and asked if I could watch him so I would know what to do. He not only let me watch him and explain as he did it, he pulled up and waited to show me and watch me as I filled my cart. My mom and his wife had a nice little chat while we were filling our carts. Can't believe what I nice time we had just getting gas for a golf cart.

[Bogie Shooter]

so sorry that you had to endure what you did! something like that is not a good thing even when you have not had a procedure! guess we can be sure it wasn't a snowbird - and the f/t residents are taking up that slack! such a shame!

hope you are feeling better since the procedure and that all will be well from her on out.

//////

[rdhdleo]

IMHO, most posters just want to share their experience or opinion because it could help other posters, or they may want to know who else has had similar experiences, or they want to share this on TOTV as part of their personal TV experience.

"Active listening" seems like a very constructive response - I hear what you're saying, thank you for sharing and caring enough to share.

What seems strange, and discouraging to me is when people make it about the poster and not the posted topic. They question their "credentials" for posting such a thing, or dismiss or minimize the person's experience, especially when it does not reflect a popular or majority view.

I hope that posters, including new posters, keep sharing and caring in spite of that.

:BigApplause: Exactly!

[rdhdleo]

Now Buggy... sometimes new people forget to look at the posting dates... chilout

Well I am certainly not new and unfortunately did not look at the date either as I look at the latest post, so I am guilty, shame on me :( We're not all perfect. Sigh.

[CFrance]

Well I am certainly not new and unfortunately did not look at the date either as I look at the latest post, so I am guilty, shame on me :( We're not all perfect. Sigh.

I'm a slow learner. It took me a couple of years and some reminders from people as to the date before I got in the habit of checking back. But I still forget too.

[TOTV Team]

Buggyone's suggestion is in line with the spirit of the site, however the delivery in his message is not.

We'll close this thread and the OP can start a new one if they so desire.