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Skip2MySue
07-30-2012, 06:37 PM
Bad day at Hallmark

Ever wondered what happens when Hallmark writers are having a bad day?



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My tire was thumping.
I thought it was flat

When I looked at the tire...

I noticed your cat.

Sorry!



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Heard your wife left you,
How upset you must be.

But don't fret about it...

She moved in with me.




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Looking back over the years

That we've been together,

I can't help but wonder...

'What the hell was I thinking?'




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Congratulations on your wedding day!

Too bad no one likes your husband.




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How could two people as beautiful as you

Have such an ugly baby?




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I've always wanted to have
Someone to hold,

Someone to love.

After having met you ..

I've changed my mind.




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I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.

I never believed in Hell until I met you.




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As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...

That you're not here to ruin it for me.




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Congratulations on your promotion.
Before you go...

Would you like to take this knife out of my back?

You'll probably need it again.




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Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!

(Available only in Tennessee , Kentucky & West Virginia )




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Happy birthday! You look great for your age.

Almost Lifelike!




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When we were together,
You always said you'd die for me.

Now that we've broken up,

I think it's time you kept your promise.




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We have been friends for a very long time .

let's say we stop?




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I'm so miserable without you

it's almost like you're here.




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Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.

Did you ever find out who the father was?




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Your friends and I wanted to do

Something special for your birthday.

So we're having you put to sleep.




)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))


So your daughter's a hooker,
And it spoiled your day.

Look at the bright side,

it's really good pay

coralway
07-30-2012, 06:44 PM
Marriage is grand

Divorce is a hundred grand.

2BNTV
07-30-2012, 09:56 PM
:1rotfl:

Lovely to look at.

Lovely to hold.

If you drop it, we mark it sold.