I am Adam Lanza's mother

[manaboutown]

A friend sent me this chilling message about the experiences of a mother of an emotionally disturbed child. They do grow up and
http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2012/12/15/i-am-adam-lanzas-mother

[2BNTV]

Here is a usuable link not writen by Nancy Lanza.

I Am Adam Lanza's Mother | Slog (http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2012/12/15/i-am-adam-lanzas-mother)

Sad :( There are no easy answers.

[Rosie53]

I read that earlier today. It really illustrates the problem in this country of dealing with our emotionally disturbed children. I pray this tragedy compels us to deal with the issues that we need to deal with.

[eweissenbach]

What a cruel and frightening world that woman is forced to live in. I cannot even imagine how one would cope with a child like that - thank God I didn't have to.

[lanabanana73]

What a cruel and frightening world that woman is forced to live in. I cannot even imagine how one would cope with a child like that - thank God I didn't have to.

I think Ed, that you have hit the nail right on the head. Those of us who do not have to deal with this in our lives daily, put our hands over our eyes and ears and think, "There but for the grace of God go I." and do nothing to work for change. I am just as guilty of that as anybody else, but how are things going to get turned around????

[NotGolfer]

I happen to know several families who've got a family member who has Aspbeger's. It's a complicated handicap to have. One family's member sounds much like the shooter and the young man in this article. They've had to call the police as well. Their family member also is on medications, lives with a single mom and doesn't have much of a support system.

Thinking back to when I was young...don't think I'd ever heard of autism! It must have been there...but undiagnosed is my guess. I'd say the first I'd heard of it was maybe within the last 20 years. It's so sad to think about on so many levels.

[cologal]

What a cruel and frightening world that woman is forced to live in. I cannot even imagine how one would cope with a child like that - thank God I didn't have to.

We need to rebuild the mental health system and to increase mental health coverage by standard insurance,

[2BNTV]

We need to rebuild the mental health system and to increase mental health coverage by standard insurance,

:agree:

[eweissenbach]

What a cruel and frightening world that woman is forced to live in. I cannot even imagine how one would cope with a child like that - thank God I didn't have to.

What I failed to add is the heartbreak that she must feel knowing one of the loves of her life is so compromised, and dangerous.

[2BNTV]

What a cruel and frightening world that woman is forced to live in. I cannot even imagine how one would cope with a child like that - thank God I didn't have to.

What I failed to add is the heartbreak that she must feel knowing one of the loves of her life is so compromised, and dangerous.

:agree:

[Lbmb24101]

I sent the link to thevarticle to my contacts.
What an agony!
Science has come far but mental illnesses are just now starting to be understood and dealt with.
I hope NIH and other agencies begin to Really pay attention.
As a teacher of 30 plus yrs i saw many young people, many, in need of help, love, social support ( the real one, notbthe virtual one)
I wish so much i had answers....That CT tragedy has been horrific.

[wendyquat]

I, too, wish I knew the answer. I fear that funding will not be available for mental health, a program that has suffered many budget cuts in the past few years!

[Golfingnut]

A child or adult like this should be considered for brain surgery to remove the portion of the brain that causes violent outbursts. I would wish that for myself before living life that way. We need more research into the functions of the brain. It is after-all just one more part of the overall human body and we operate on every other part.

[graciegirl]

A child or adult like this should be considered for brain surgery to remove the portion of the brain that causes violent outbursts. I would wish that for myself before living life that way. We need more research into the functions of the brain. It is after-all just one more part of the overall human body and we operate on every other part.

A pre frontal lobotomy? I think that was done on John Kennedy's sister. I think that is a very extreme measure.

[jblum315]

Anyway, it's too late for this nut case.

[redwitch]

I've seen this type of behavior and the effects on the family, the child, the friends and community. One of my dearest friends in California has a son who has threatened his family since he was five years old. He's spent more time in child psychiatric institutions than he has at school and he's in his teens now. The family is totally ostracized from the community -- people are afraid to be around him and think the parents aren't doing enough. The mother and father have split up because of the boy but somehow have found the strength to get try again as a couple. The siblings stay away from home as much as possible -- even the street corner when everything is closed is preferable to home. The few friends who have had the courage to remain friends to this family rarely go to their house and, of course, the boy is not welcome in theirs. So, this family is totally isolated from the community.

The only "help" is locking the child up when he becomes violent. Sooner or later, the parents are going to have to make the hard choice -- lock their son up somewhere or let him loose on society. Right now, there really isn't anything in between.

The bigger tragedy is not that children exist like this young man but that there is no help for the parents. Social services tries to force the parents to give up parental rights and then basically locks the child into a "therapeutic" foster home where the child is put on very strong medication and then locked away until adulthood, at which time the child is forced to fend for himself. The courts will lock a child like this away, give it treatment in a juvenile facility or prison (not jail -- very little treatment occurs there) and then, again, let the child loose with no real backup once time has been served.

There are no easy solutions. There is no short-term fix. There needs to be more help and support for the families and continuing help for the child when it reaches adulthood. As long as we keep on doing things the way we are doing them, we will continue to hear of tragedies of this sort.

[Golfingnut]

Like a sick heart or kidney, the Brain needs medical intervention and I don't mean office therapy. We need more research into the workings of the brain to perform safe surgery to correct these illnesses or alter the brain to eliminate the violent outbursts that occur.

[gomoho]

Why so many children with these so called "damaged brains". Is it genetic, environmental, both? Can't remember kids with these problems when I grew up - were they locked away? They talk about having to lock schools now - we didn't even lock our homes. Seems like our society is failing on all counts. The lack of mental health and support for these families would certainly be a good place to start but we also need to understand how this starts in the first place.

[LI SNOWBIRD]

Like a sick heart or kidney, the Brain needs medical intervention and I don't mean office therapy. We need more research into the workings of the brain to perform safe surgery to correct these illnesses or alter the brain to eliminate the violent outbursts that occur.

I really don't think you can cut the demon out.

[Taltarzac725]

I really don't think you can cut the demon out.

The thread is starting to look like One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.

[2BNTV]

There are no easy answers. Mental illness is something the person who is ill must work extremely hard to understand what is going on in their mind. There are many forms and medications do help in a lot of cases. I would tend to think there are a great number of people who are diminished in the sense they could lead a much more effective life. I cases where the mentally ill person is a threat to themselves or others needs to be treated in a safe environment.

How does all this get accomplished is for better minds than I. Mental health needs to be funded properly. As a society, we need more avenues for people to get treatment before tradgedy strikes. GOD knows the world is getting crazier every day. I fear that many people don't get treatment because they don't have the resources and or not willing to get help. A pull yourself up by the bootstraps train of thought does not work.

Off soapbox. :smiley:

[kittygilchrist]

When I read the title I thought it was some weirdo. After reading the article, I am in total agreement. Having worked in mental and forensic institutions and hybrids as a Psychological Specialist, I saw into the void we call the mental health "system". We truly need a fresh dialogue and to spend some of the wasted give-away dollars to help families and individuals who are demonized for institutionalizing their loved ones. We need a system of institutions with flexible entrance and exit strategies and an end to stigmatizing people with maladaptive brain function.

[zonerboy]

We need to face the facts. Many forms of mental illness are simply NOT curable, or even effectively treatable, given our current state of medical knowledge.
No matter how much money we throw at them, no matter how much health insurance one might have.
In many cases, medications provide minimal symptomatic alleviation. And other treatment modalities are only partly effective.
We need to protect ourselves even if it means curtailing the "civil rights" of the mentally ill. Those with tendencies towards violence of any kind, or who even threaten violence, need to be confined.....permanently if necessary, until such time as we can RELIABLY prevent violent behavior.

[rubicon]

Anyway, it's too late for this nut case.

I cannot add much to the solution to this problem but I believe I can safely say that referring to people with neuro-brain disorers as "nut cases"doesn't help

Reading this thread I am left with the impression that all mental illness cases are being treated as the same. The fact is there are degrees the same as the levels designated with cancer, burns, etc. many people have mental issues but live full lives in many professions. It is unfortunate when a "sandy Hook"incidnt occurs because it puts thr spotlight on one person ignoring the millions of people who will never harm anyone.

The mental health system is inadequate and underfunded. Further diagnosis is tricky and an initial diagnosis can be incorrect.

I have a physical disease that was never properly diagnosis until 26 years later and the docs all had a visual view so how much harder is it to diagnosis a brain disorder. Remeber Alzheimer's has many of the same symptoms as mental illnesses and I don't hear people call them nut cases. Perhaps it because they are concerned that they or a love one could sucumb to this disease and not other mental disorders. Please in discussing this topic let's hope reason supercedes emotion

[janmcn]

We need to face the facts. Many forms of mental illness are simply NOT curable, or even effectively treatable, given our current state of medical knowledge.
No matter how much money we throw at them, no matter how much health insurance one might have.
In many cases, medications provide minimal symptomatic alleviation. And other treatment modalities are only partly effective.
We need to protect ourselves even if it means curtailing the "civil rights" of the mentally ill. Those with tendencies towards violence of any kind, or who even threaten violence, need to be confined.....permanently if necessary, until such time as we can RELIABLY prevent violent behavior.

And please keep your guns and ammunition locked up if you have a violent, mentally ill person living in your home.

[senior citizen]

A child or adult like this should be considered for brain surgery to remove the portion of the brain that causes violent outbursts. I would wish that for myself before living life that way. We need more research into the functions of the brain. It is after-all just one more part of the overall human body and we operate on every other part.



Rosemary Kennedy - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rosemary_Kennedy)

I really do not believe that they would perform a lobotomy in 2012/13.
Especially after how the lobotomy done on Rosemary Kennedy turned out........

Nowadays they try "chemical restraints" which sometimes "unbalance" the patient even more.......sad to say.

Just saw on our morning news that since Hurricane Irene flooded our state mental hospital up in Waterbury, Vermont, doctors have been at their wit's end in trying to deal with all of the mental patients........and no place to put them. A few are being kept in various hospitals around the state.......but according to the doctors interviewed, it is a massive problem.

Citizens of Vermont have been wondering , for decades, why they let so many deranged folks roam around, when they obviously need close supervision........there just is no place to put them all, especially now, after the massive flooding.

We both just heard on the morning t.v. news that a "POSSIBLE MOTIVE" for Adam Lanza's rampage was that he either overheard or discovered that his mother was planning on incarcerating him in a mental institution..........heard that on ABC. Not cast in stone , so "don't shoot the messenger"........just what we heard.

[graciegirl]

There are no easy answers. Mental illness is something the person who is ill must work extremely hard to understand what is going on in their mind. There are many forms and medications do help in a lot of cases. I would tend to think there are a great number of people who are diminished in the sense they could lead a much more effective life. I cases where the mentally ill person is a threat to themselves or others needs to be treated in a safe environment.

How does all this get accomplished is for better minds than I. Mental health needs to be funded properly. As a society, we need more avenues for people to get treatment before tradgedy strikes. GOD knows the world is getting crazier every day. I fear that many people don't get treatment because they don't have the resources and or not willing to get help. A pull yourself up by the bootstraps train of thought does not work.

Off soapbox. :smiley:

Well said Joe.

Hurry home.

[mikeandnancy1112]

Heart wrenching! Can't even imagine how hard her life must be.

[janmcn]

Adam Lanza's Motive: Did Fear Of Being Committed Lead To Sandy Hook Elementary Shooting? (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/12/19/adam-lanza-motive_n_2329508.html?1355925730&icid=maing-grid7%7Cmaing9%7Cdl2%7Csec1_lnk3%26pLid%3D247593)


It is reported in this article that Nancy Lanza was in the process of trying to have Adam committed to a facility, and that is what set him off. Who knows what the truth is. More details will be divulged as the investigation continues.

[Taltarzac725]

Adam Lanza's Motive: Did Fear Of Being Committed Lead To Sandy Hook Elementary Shooting? (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/12/19/adam-lanza-motive_n_2329508.html?1355925730&icid=maing-grid7%7Cmaing9%7Cdl2%7Csec1_lnk3%26pLid%3D247593)


It is reported in this article that Nancy Lanza was in the process of trying to have Adam committed to a facility, and that is what set him off. Who knows what the truth is. More details will be divulged as the investigation continues.

Wait and see what the facts really are. It does sound like he was extremely angry at his mother and wanted to not only murder her but destroy everything she loved in her life.

Still see this as the work of an evil person and not so much as someone who is mentally ill. Evil people have murdered children quite frequently.

There are 57.7 mentally ill people in a year in the US according to the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill. http://www.nami.org/

Also remember that people with some kind of mental illness have contributed greatly to art and the sciences over the last couple of thousand of years. http://health.discovery.com/tv/psych-week/articles/celebrities-mental-disorders.html

http://www.nami.org/Template.cfm?Section=Helpline1&template=/ContentManagement/ContentDisplay.cfm&ContentID=4858

[ilovetv]

I can understand the difficulties of trying to get thru "the system" of getting a child like Adam committed and that it would take a long time for a loving parent to come to grips with that need. What I cannot understand is how this parent could have been in her right mind, having an ASSAULT rifle.....much less keeping it in the home with the son--and then taking him to the shooting range and teaching him to use it and practice with it.

People had to know the mother had these guns and was teaching the son with them (the gun range people said she brought him there). To me, this means the father, brother, and neighbors/friends probably knew it too.

I think this society has grown numb to the signs and signals of potential killers like this, and has its collective head in the sand and in denial. I don't think that society's thinking on this has improved much since Columbine 12 years ago!

Good grief.....Army psychiatrists and faculty physicians at Walter Reed Army Medical Center tip-toed around the Ft. Hood shooter's clear signals that he felt no empathy for those he would easily mass-murder for the sake of jihad. If the faculty, staff and colleagues THERE did not press to get the guy out of the classroom and clinical practice....general society has to be far, far behind them in removing a person like Lanza from the place he'd like to make into a killing field.

And university and college faculty, administration, and counseling services knew about the VA Tech and Tuscon, and Denver theater shooters having this propensity, too!

They have set the tone for societal thinking on this, and it's a recipe for more terror like Newtown, not less.

[Taltarzac725]

I can understand the difficulties of trying to get thru "the system" of getting a child like Adam committed and that it would take a long time for a loving parent to come to grips with that need. What I cannot understand is how this parent could have been in her right mind, having an ASSAULT rifle.....much less keeping it in the home with the son--and then taking him to the shooting range and teaching him to use it and practice with it.

People had to know the mother had these guns and was teaching the son with them (the gun range people said she brought him there). To me, this means the father, brother, and neighbors/friends probably knew it too.

I think this society has grown numb to the signs and signals of potential killers like this, and has its collective head in the sand and in denial. I don't think that society's thinking on this has improved much since Columbine 12 years ago!

Good grief.....Army psychiatrists and faculty physicians at Walter Reed Army Medical Center tip-toed around the Ft. Hood shooter's clear signals that he felt no empathy for those he would easily mass-murder for the sake of jihad. If the faculty, staff and colleagues THERE did not press to get the guy out of the classroom and clinical practice....general society has to be far, far behind them in removing a person like Lanza from the place he'd like to make into a killing field.

And university and college faculty, administration, and counseling services knew about the VA Tech and Tuscon, and Denver theater shooters having this propensity, too!

They have set the tone for societal thinking on this, and it's a recipe for more terror like Newtown, not less.

You are making this too simple. And any panacea can be abused by anyone with authority or power over others. I would bet that the victims in Penn State's child abuse scandal probably often felt that they had various mental health problems because of how badly they were treated within their community.

What is needed is some common sense and practical solutions to dealing with those who use violence to send a message. A terrorist does this and very few terrorists in my mind are mentally ill.

You also might have an extremely dysfunctional family involved or maybe even one where the only real members are a mother and her son or perhaps a grandfather and his grandson. The traditional family has changed a great deal over the last fifty years or so.

[ilovetv]

You are making this too simple. And any panacea can be abused by anyone with authority or power over others. I would bet that the victims in Penn State's child abuse scandal probably often felt that they had various mental health problems because of how badly they were treated within their community.

What is needed is some common sense and practical solutions to dealing with those who use violence to send a message. A terrorist does this and very few terrorists in my mind are mentally ill.

You also might have an extremely dysfunctional family involved or maybe even one where the only real members are a mother and her son or perhaps a grandfather and his grandson. The traditional family has changed a great deal over the last fifty years or so.

I think you misunderstand my post. I think people who use violence should be locked up and removed from society "to send a message".

What I'm saying above is that society has learned to LOOK THE OTHER WAY AND IGNORE kids showing signs of violent behavior and macabre thinking, and the denial is aided by faculty, physicians, courts, and counseling professionals who minimize what they are seeing.