FOR SINGLES ONLY: What was it like moving to TV as a single?

[katerogers]

Let's face it, when you're single, moving to a new community is a lot more challenging than taking that step into the unknown as a couple. Granted, we are likely to have varied back stories, we most likely adapt to a new environment differently and our ability to make new friends may run from 'a piece of cake' to 'pulling teeth. So, it would be helpful to hear from the singles (male and female) who have already had this experience. What was it like for you when you first moved to TV? Did you buy a place, rent or room with someone? What were your expectations and how did your socialization get it's start? How long did it take for you to feel like you belonged or are you still waiting? Please don't hesitate to mention the good with the bad. You're still there, after all, so even if the road was rocky at first it must have smoothed out eventually. And we could benefit from your "would a", 'could a', 'should a'.

Katie

[Geewiz]

Single women outnumber guys by a huge number and many guys have a sense of entitlement. The girls are often smarter than the guys and develop a cynical wariness - except when it comes to dancing and chocolate...which gets them every time (show me a woman who doesn't like to dance and then have chocolate). I date a bit in TV and, more so, outside of TV. Hookups are easy...deep friendships and love - much harder. There are singles clubs here and consider meetup groups. Good hunting!

[kittygilchrist]

I don't know why the singles posts seem so sterile of engaging comment to this point, but I'm saying oorah for KR and Geewiz for saying something genuine.

[chachacha]

i was part of a couple when i moved here but it was long distance...i had already created a circle of friends from this site, actually, and many of us are still friends to this day, five years later! they supported me through the death of my partner, whom they had come to love when he spent the first winter here. we have now each developed other circles of friends and activities but that core group still means so much to me. we had great times with the excitement of sharing our new homes with each other. you too will find that a core group of good friends will make life great through good and bad.

[kittygilchrist]

I'd like to meet singles a few at a time so I really get to know you. I'm thinking of hosting small gatherings, not for the hundreds. Would you who are reading be interested in coming to my home?

[KathieI]

Let's face it, when you're single, moving to a new community is a lot more challenging than taking that step into the unknown as a couple. Granted, we are likely to have varied back stories, we most likely adapt to a new environment differently and our ability to make new friends may run from 'a piece of cake' to 'pulling teeth. So, it would be helpful to hear from the singles (male and female) who have already had this experience. What was it like for you when you first moved to TV? Did you buy a place, rent or room with someone? What were your expectations and how did your socialization get it's start? How long did it take for you to feel like you belonged or are you still waiting? Please don't hesitate to mention the good with the bad. You're still there, after all, so even if the road was rocky at first it must have smoothed out eventually. And we could benefit from your "would a", 'could a', 'should a'.

Katie

Wow, Katie, that's a lot of questions. Well, let me try to answer some by giving you my experience. I moved here from Los Angeles with 3 dogs and my 90+yo father. After 30 years of marriage, I was a single woman moving cross country again. (did it in the 70's from NY to LA). By the time I got here, I already had at least 50 friends, married and single, all who I met through TOTV. In our single group, were 5 males and 5 females and we did almost everything together and partied a lot and set up meet and greets with lots of other newbies as they came into town. Eventually this group (not just of singles) grew very large, and, in time, some got married, some passed away (unfortunately) and the group keeps growing. I didn't not find one day of it to be challenging as I find it very easy to make friends. Some days, I would go to a rec center and just start to talk to people to fill up some time or to make more friends. At restaurants and food shopping, I would talk to a lot of people. As this group of friends has grown, its wonderful to have them segmented by various activities that I am involved in. For Instance, I have dancing friends, lunch and dinner friends, water aerobics friends, MVP friends, etc. I always felt like I belonged - never very sure if I liked Florida better than CA, but I do know that the friends that I have here now are the most wonderful part of my life. I couldn't exist without these friends, and I'm so happy they are in my life. I'm sure you can get to this point too, just try to surround yourself with people you can trust, who trust you, who have the same likes and dislikes and never talk politics, lol....

[chachacha]

I'd like to meet singles a few at a time so I really get to know you. I'm thinking of hosting small gatherings, not for the hundreds. Would you who are reading be interested in coming to my home?

after the lovely lunch we enjoyed at Gracie Girl's today, i cannot wait for the next get together! and by the way, Kathie is one of my core group whom i mentioned earlier!

[Geewiz]

I'd like to meet singles a few at a time so I really get to know you. I'm thinking of hosting small gatherings, not for the hundreds. Would you who are reading be interested in coming to my home?

Consider me in...I'll even bring a guitar and write you a song on the spot...a kiss gets you a second song.

[redwitch]

I'm a loner. Always have been. I have no interest in dating. BTDT, don't want to ever do it again. At the same time, I do like being around some people (male and female) and I dearly love playing games, especially card games. So, I've managed to find my core group in games -- bridge, Mah-Jongg, Triple Play, poker.

You'll find your niche. As to how long it takes, I'd say that depends on you -- if you're outgoing like Kathie, you won't have any problems. If you're quiet and shy, it will take longer. If you're in the middle, then you'll quickly make friends in some groups but take longer to be accepted in others. Regardless, you'll only be as lonely as you choose to be.

[KatieDidNot]

Hello Katie

I am from Florida, and after being in the military this return home was my 15th move. So coming home was natural for me. I am divorced and to be honest, I do not have to continually have to be in a relationship. It is not on my priority list...I am complete as I am. If I meet someone wonderful, then great, if not, that is OK too...it is not an active pursuit.

The only expectation I had coming here was to have a beautiful home with a view, and peace. Mission accomplished.

I am like another poster here, I make friends easily once I meet them and I consider friends the most important of all relationships...except family.

I have never found any problems or concerns with the married couples here and they include me in all their functions with no problems.

I own my home and I would not have had it any other way because I already knew the area.

I always felt like I belonged, and I am not waiting. I am always meeting new friends and always have room in my life for more. I can normally get along with most people from all types of backgrounds. Life is too short to wait on anything.

And for the record, I don't like to dance, because military wounds have a way of catching up quickly over the years...but chocolate always makes me feel great! :thumbup: And cheesecake...I believe in eating dessert before dinner, just in case it is my last.

Katie

[maybe]

I'd like to meet singles a few at a time so I really get to know you. I'm thinking of hosting small gatherings, not for the hundreds. Would you who are reading be interested in coming to my home?

Sounds like a good idea. I'd come.

Bill

[katerogers]

I believe, Kitty expressed it perfectly. 'Why are single posts so stertile of engaging comments?'

I think most residents would agree - and it seems to be supported in your posts - that it was through the Talk of the Villages that newcomers, especially singles, have looked to for the real story behind living in such a unique community. And some have been able to develop friendships that made their transitions much easier and that continued long after their move to TV.

But, like Kitty says, why are there so few recent, meaningful discussions that affect the singles of TV. There are so many threads (oh, so many), with ambiguous titles and outdated posts that it's almost impossible to track down the subjects you're searching for and you feel foolish for starting another thread that has already been brought up - even though no one actually answered the question.

I suppose, being a novice at this, I hoped an open invitation to the single residents of TV, to share their real experiences, to offer advice for the single newcomer, or to even suggest ways to avoid the social pitfalls, that most newcomers fall into, will go a long way to ease any concerns or just help us to feel connected.

And lastly - and this may be an impossible undertaking, but wonderfully convenient for those who would rather spend less time searching and more time 'doing' - to work toward a more organized single forum for a contiuous, evolving, open discussion where any topics unique to the single resident can be added, discussed thoughtfully and not judged.

On that point, thank you, GW, Kitty, Diane, Kathie, Red, Katie, & Bill for 'getting it' and offering helpful responses. And it's cool that, in the least, this post prompted an 'ad hoc' get together.

I am now permanetly stepping down from my soapbox, never to fillibuster again. I can only offer an excuse for my long-winded, yawnfest on a recent, frustrating, search and a bout of insomnia

[Newbeginnings]

I just became single 2 years ago, moved to TV November 2012. Met some singles, met lots of neighbors, single and married. Not dating, just some good friendships as that's all I want right now. I am not the best at being assertive in this new life, but getting better. I know what I need to do to get out there but not really interested in becoming a couple with anyone right now, met some who want a relationship right now and I am just not ready. Enjoy my women friends and some of the guys but there are very few of those as most of the get togethers are mostly women. Met some of "entitled men" who have approached me with the line " Well, here I am " and don't do anything except sit and stare waiting for me to do all the conversation work and ask all about them, met one who turned out to be married and couldn't understand why I would not date him again, told me I had a problem, and met another one who told me all about his libido. I have to laugh about some the experiences now and it's only been 6 months here. I am too new at this to take anything away from my experience, I am still learning all about this new life and living in TV and like hearing from the other singles on this forum.

[KatieDidNot]

I believe, Kitty expressed it perfectly. 'Why are single posts so stertile of engaging comments?'

I think most residents would agree - and it seems to be supported in your posts - that it was through the Talk of the Villages that newcomers, especially singles, have looked to for the real story behind living in such a unique community. And some have been able to develop friendships that made their transitions much easier and that continued long after their move to TV.

But, like Kitty says, why are there so few recent, meaningful discussions that affect the singles of TV. There are so many threads (oh, so many), with ambiguous titles and outdated posts that it's almost impossible to track down the subjects you're searching for and you feel foolish for starting another thread that has already been brought up - even though no one actually answered the question.

I suppose, being a novice at this, I hoped an open invitation to the single residents of TV, to share their real experiences, to offer advice for the single newcomer, or to even suggest ways to avoid the social pitfalls, that most newcomers fall into, will go a long way to ease any concerns or just help us to feel connected.

And lastly - and this may be an impossible undertaking, but wonderfully convenient for those who would rather spend less time searching and more time 'doing' - to work toward a more organized single forum for a contiuous, evolving, open discussion where any topics unique to the single resident can be added, discussed thoughtfully and not judged.

On that point, thank you, GW, Kitty, Diane, Kathie, Red, Katie, & Bill for 'getting it' and offering helpful responses. And it's cool that, in the least, this post prompted an 'ad hoc' get together.

I am now permanetly stepping down from my soapbox, never to fillibuster again. I can only offer an excuse for my long-winded, yawnfest on a recent, frustrating, search and a bout of insomnia

Thank you for this post and thread. It was needed. It has given all of us some things to think about.

This forum can only be as good as us Singles make it. ChaX3, has done a wonderful job at trying to keep it together, but it could be better if we all worked at it too. I think we all have some issues that would liked to be addresses, but are afraid to post. Maybe those of us who are posting, could continue and it might bring others out of the woodwork.

Hope you don't step off that soapbox too permanently. ;)

Katie

[Susan G]

Sent you a PM....Susan

[katerogers]

Oh, NewB, I laughed out loud when I read your post. Good for you!. It looks like GWiz nailed it. Actually. my very first post on Talk of the Villages was about the number of married men who were advertising on Craigslists. Some even used the statistics of 10-1, women to men, as a reason why we should be honored by their 'offer'. I think they'd be surprised to find out just how meaningless these numbers are, when there are more women who are perfectly content at being single and would rather have some great gal pals than to settle for the 'entitled'.

Thanks for the support, Katie, I hope it does spark some interest and some of the singles who are living there now will pick up the ball and run with it.

You're so right about Chachacha's efforts. It also goes to show how some of the single residents are either disinterested in the issues that most impact them or there aren't enough who are willing to band together to bring about change. Cha wrote an important post about the unfairness in the distribution of the ID badges. From her, I learned that the single residents are being shortchanged, which causes problems for those who are dating or have friends who are not residents of TV. She was trying to do something about it not just vent, but as Kitty pointed out, for the most part, the comments weren't engaging. I don't know what the issues are that some are afraid to post, but, I have a sneaking suspicion that that just might change. Yeah!

Katie

[Geewiz]

Don't give up on the possibility of finding a deep love.... there is a home for every heart...despite the posers and libido obsessed. I turn 60 tomorrow and I'll be damned to give up on the dream of sharing adventures...whether in TV or Paris and then A framing at the end of a day.

[kittygilchrist]

There seems to be enough interest in a singles get together to announce a party! Saturday, May 18, 6 pm, my house S of 466A in Gilchrist. Let's have a potluck--I'll provide main dish, salad, rolls, and sodas. Geewiz will entertain us with his guitar--trala!
I have to limit this somehow, so please post to this thread , and tell us if you want to bring a side or dessert. BYOB. I'll send the address privately.
I look forward to getting to know you!
Kitty

[Geewiz]

There seems to be enough interest in a singles get together to announce a party! Saturday, May 18, 6 pm, my house S of 466A in Gilchrist. Let's have a potluck--I'll provide main dish, salad, rolls, and sodas. Geewiz will entertain us with his guitar--trala!
I have to limit this somehow, so please PM me with the title count me in, and tell me if you want to bring a side or dessert. BYOB. I'll send the address privately.
I look forward to getting to know you!
Kitty

If you want a particular song...let me know

For you romantics...here's one of mine

Prayer

I knelt down to watch you sleep
And drew the sheet to kiss your shoulder twice
Then slipped into that quiet place
Between your breaths
The marrow of my life
Your beautiful sighs

Safe may love keep you
You who're my heart
And my holiness
May my dreams reach you
Drape you and keep you
Warm throughout the night
Safe until the light

When I sleep I tumble through the trees
Made of the jungle that's your hair
And dance upon your seashell mouth
Still echoing with words so sweet with care
Renewing my life

Safe may love keep you
You who're my heart
And my holiness
May my dreams reach you
Drape you and keep you
Warm throughout the night
Safe until the light

Love redeems us like a pilgrimage
Love redeems us
I stand here for forever
With you etched in my memory
Elemental just like air and sea

Time drips by in memories
And love is like some crushing river
We are just 2 floating flowers far beyond the shore
We struggle to maintain the surface
We struggle to retain our purpose
Kneeling here against the current
I'm praying to a star

Safe may love keep you....

[kittygilchrist]

Bill, see my post regarding having a party..Sounds like a good idea. I'd come.

Bill

[KatieDidNot]

There seems to be enough interest in a singles get together to announce a party! Saturday, May 18, 6 pm, my house S of 466A in Gilchrist. Let's have a potluck--I'll provide main dish, salad, rolls, and sodas. Geewiz will entertain us with his guitar--trala!
I have to limit this somehow, so please PM me with the title count me in, and tell me if you want to bring a side or dessert. BYOB. I'll send the address privately.
I look forward to getting to know you!
Kitty

I say that would be mighty fine! I live in the Village next to you, so I will drive the Golf Cart. Since my post talked about no dancing, just Dessert...I will bring one of the Desserts!

Katie

[misky]

Let's face it, when you're single, moving to a new community is a lot more challenging than taking that step into the unknown as a couple. Granted, we are likely to have varied back stories, we most likely adapt to a new environment differently and our ability to make new friends may run from 'a piece of cake' to 'pulling teeth. So, it would be helpful to hear from the singles (male and female) who have already had this experience. What was it like for you when you first moved to TV? Did you buy a place, rent or room with someone? What were your expectations and how did your socialization get it's start? How long did it take for you to feel like you belonged or are you still waiting? Please don't hesitate to mention the good with the bad. You're still there, after all, so even if the road was rocky at first it must have smoothed out eventually. And we could benefit from your "would a", 'could a', 'should a'.

Katie


Long story short. I moved here at the beginning of 2012. I play tennis, pickleball, golf, yoga, some clubs. I find it easy to develop friendships through sports. You have a natural common interest. Not much of a dancer so I don't go to those types of events. I go to plenty of events (concerts, plays, dinners, etc) by myself. I believe you can't being alone let you miss these things. Although I do miss a good conversation at dinner.

[kittygilchrist]

I say that would be mighty fine! I live in the Village next to you, so I will drive the Golf Cart. Since my post talked about no dancing, just Dessert...I will bring one of the Desserts!

Katie

great, Katie, I can't wait to meet you!

[CarolSells]

Kitty,

Count me in, please. I'll bring a side. Woohoo!.

[kittygilchrist]

Kitty,

Count me in, please. I'll bring a side. Woohoo!.

Hey Carol, I already know you! Bark this up to other newbies, not to exclude oldies...
Kitty

[chachacha]

i love your poem, Gee Whiz! it is beautiful. would you sing that at kitty's and tell us your inspiration? we can only really get to be friends by sharing our experiences and there must be a story behind that song! kitty, i will make pigs in a blanket as an hors-d'oeuvre. sounds like it will be great fun! wish katerogers could come!

[kittygilchrist]

oh, Cha, I was hoping someone would think of the unspellable dish to non-French speakers and make an appetizer. so glad you can come....

[2BNTV]

Count me in too. :smiley:

[maybe]

Bill, see my post regarding having a party..

Thanks. I 'll bring a dish. I await the address.

Bill

[Bonnevie]

I would love to come but won't be living up there yet...hopefully, by next month
please let me know when the next gathering will be
as soon as I get up there and settled, I'd be happy to host one

[DianeM]

I too won't be up in TV by the dinner but I'll be there the first week in June and look forward to it. I'm a bit nervous about not knowing anyone yet but, hopefully, it won't take long to meet people and make new friends. I'm currently in Orlando and love Mickey but need adults. I will say one thing though - I'm pretty sick of people's comments when I say I'm moving to TV. I'm sick to death of the STD comments.

[eremite06]

All you singles need to join the Villages Parrot Heads club. You don't have to live in the Villages and there are clubs all over the country. Very informal... everyone's in a party mood, and you'll meet many, many nice friendly people.

[kittygilchrist]

Let me know when you arrive and we'll get together. Before I moved, I made the joke about std's myself just to get it out of the way. I too won't be up in TV by the dinner but I'll be there the first week in June and look forward to it. I'm a bit nervous about not knowing anyone yet but, hopefully, it won't take long to meet people and make new friends. I'm currently in Orlando and love Mickey but need adults. I will say one thing though - I'm pretty sick of people's comments when I say I'm moving to TV. I'm sick to death of the STD comments.

[Bonnevie]

funny thing, someone just mentioned it AGAIN the other day to me....

[DianeM]

Kitty - it's a deal. Coffee, tea or what I may have when I get there.
Hope, my Vet just brought it up yesterday. Geesh !!!
I like the idea of the "Parrot Heads' Club". Sounds good to me.

[Bonnevie]

it was a doctor I where I work that brought it up when I said where I was moving...must have been in a medical journal somewhere...

[RETIREDSFW]

Moved here last year after husband died. Count me in---i will bring a desert.

[kittygilchrist]

Moved here last year after husband died. Count me in---i will bring a desert.

I look forward to meeting you. What's your name?
Kitty

[katerogers]

Thank you for this post and thread. It was needed. It has given all of us some things to think about.

This forum can only be as good as us Singles make it. ChaX3, has done a wonderful job at trying to keep it together, but it could be better if we all worked at it too. I think we all have some issues that would liked to be addresses, but are afraid to post. Maybe those of us who are posting, could continue and it might bring others out of the woodwork.

Hope you don't step off that soapbox too permanently. ;)

Katie

Cha thanks, I too wish I could be with you at the first gathering of the "For Singles Only" Alliance. I'm sure that those of us who can't be there would love to read a tell all report, after Kitty's soiree. Can photos be posted to these forums? I would like to see GeeWiz in action.

And Kitty, thanks for being the first to pick up the ball and running with it. It's nice to see that the group is already growing and engaging, just like KatieD predicted.

I hope NewB and RedW get to go and that Chachacha will find the support she needs to get those ID Badges that we definitely have an equal right to.

Katie R

[manaboutown]

it was a doctor I where I work that brought it up when I said where I was moving...must have been in a medical journal somewhere...

The rise in STDs pertains to retirement communities in general, probably due to recent medical advances for both men and women which can dramatically increase the lengths of their sexually active lives. The Villages, unfortunately, got singled out by an Orlando reporter in 2006 from an aside comment made by a gynecologist, Dr. Colleen McQuade, who was surprised to find folks in the Villages were experiencing STD issues in significant numbers, given their ages. She said something to the effect she was surprised that she was seeing more STDs in The Villages than she had seen in Miami.

http://articles.orlandosentinel.com/2011-05-16/health/os-seniors-stds-national-20110516_1_std-cases-syphilis-and-chlamydia-older-adults

Be safe, however you choose to do so!

[kittygilchrist]

Sorry the Kates can't come. We'll have to do this often! Pass it on to singe friends, potluck party at Kitty's in Gilchrist, sat, may 18, 6 pm. rsvp here for the address to come later. Geewiz will entertain us with his guitar and song.
Kitty

[Susan G]

Sorry the Kates can't come. We'll have to do this often! Pass it on to singe friends, potluck party at Kitty's in Gilchrist, sat, may 18, 6 pm. rsvp here for the address to come later. Geewiz will entertain us with his guitar and song.
Kitty

Hi Kitty & all the rest of the singles gang...I get off work at 3pm that Saturday, so I'll be there. I'll make New Orleans Chicken Gumbo & rice. Looking forward to meeting all of you. Susan

[katerogers]

Kitty, first let me say, I think you may be taking on more than you bargained for, but, it is an inspired way to launch a focused Singles group.

As an example: This STD issue, that Diane brought up, is exactly what we should not be afraid to talk about openly (Katie, is this the kind of post you were talking about?) Being aware of this problem is important to any Single who is dating in TV. I had never heard a thing about it before today and frankly it was kind of a shock. I would be surprised if this is common knowledge among TV's new single residents or to the singles, like me and the others who have recently joined us but who have yet to arrive. (PS. MAT thanks for the article) Are there others here who have had to endure kind of mockery?

On that point, and this is only a suggestion if the core participants are even interested in developing our current thread into something more tangible -Maybe someone at the party could recommend another method of communicating online. Some kind of private forum for an interactive special interest Singles group. A site where we will be more comfortable talking openly, about 'engaging' topics, unique and of interest or concern to us, as well as providing a better way for the members (for lack of a better term) - to invite the participants to attend more social get-togethers, like Kitty's. Just a thought.
Katie R

[DianeM]

Kate - I'm not in The Villages yet but the STD issue is one I have heard many many times in the past several months I've been thinking about moving. I'm annoyed with it by this point. Seems to be the very first thing that I hear when I say I'm moving to The Villages.

I do like the idea of an interactive form of communicating. Maybe we can all come up with something.

[kittygilchrist]

Kitty, first let me say, I think you may be taking on more than you bargained for, but, it is an inspired way to launch a focused Singles group.

As an example: This STD issue, that Diane brought up, is exactly what we should not be afraid to talk about openly (Katie, is this the kind of post you were talking about?) Being aware of this problem is important to any Single who is dating in TV. I had never heard a thing about it before today and frankly it was kind of a shock. I would be surprised if this is common knowledge among TV's new single residents or to the singles, like me and the others who have recently joined us but who have yet to arrive. (PS. MAT thanks for the article) Are there others here who have had to endure kind of mockery?

On that point, and this is only a suggestion if the core participants are even interested in developing our current thread into something more tangible -Maybe someone at the party could recommend another method of communicating online. Some kind of private forum for an interactive special interest Singles group. A site where we will be more comfortable talking openly, about 'engaging' topics, unique and of interest or concern to us, as well as providing a better way for the members (for lack of a better term) - to invite the participants to attend more social get-togethers, like Kitty's. Just a thought.
Katie R

Katie, re biting off too much, a potluck is my lazy way to make sure there's enough for everyone without exactly counting. It's an almost hostess-free party, and I've had many that allowed me to have fun instead of fuss. I'm sure an open invitation with a title: Party at Kitty's would be a chandelier swinger, but the lights here haven't yet been installed!

I'll send the address to the first 30-40 who rsvp here in this thread. I love the feeling of the energies of friends in my home, so I welcome you all, and you should come just to meet my boxer, Emma. She will love the company!Kitty
ps, I just wish you could come. Maybe somebody will have a Kate party next.

[Geewiz]

I'll bring the STDs...just kidding.

[katerogers]

Then you're definitely the perfect hostess for this soiree. Do you really think 30 plus will rsvp at this site? That would be some launch.

I had a memorable potluck party once. I asked them all to "Just bring a side dish". I got 28 of them. All macaroni salads. As each guest arrived, with their large bowls in hand, it got funnier and funnier. We ended up having a contest for the best recipe. I don't think I've had macaroni salad since.

Katie

[KatieDidNot]

Oh, my...here we go again contributing to the STD rumor.

Kitty, sorry, I have to back out...this thread has really turned South. I don't want to go to a party to talk about STDs...too serious for polite or fun conversation and certainly not a way to get to know one another. It would gross me out. That is something that should privately be discussed between two consenting adults.

Ya'll have fun though. You are going to have a lot of Singles show up and finally get to meet each other. In the meantime, I think I will be putting the wedding ring back on.

And, Katie, NO that was not what I was talking about. I am too polite...did not even occur to me.

Katie

[Rgraves]

I'd like to meet singles a few at a time so I really get to know you. I'm thinking of hosting small gatherings, not for the hundreds. Would you who are reading be interested in coming to my home?
I just moved in 10 days ago and would love to start making friends. If you decide to go ahead with something at your home, let me know what I can bring and count me in! Thanks, Ronnye

[RETIREDSFW]

Kitty, "retiredsfw" is sandra f webb. Moved to santo domingo last october.

[katerogers]

Katie,

I really wish that you would reconsider leaving the group. You certainly have every reason to be upset with the posts that neither respect, nor understand what we are trying to accomplish here. My reaction was the same, but, I know they do not represent the rest of us. We want to bring issues to the table that are particularly unique to the Singles living in TV. But, unfortunately some problems will not be easy to discuss or resolve and this STD rumor is apparently one of those that is truly sickening, but nonetheless a potential problem for all of us. I was shocked to find out that some of the women who posted had had to ensure snide remarks about living in TV. It made me angry and I don't even live there. It's unfortunate that this issue happened to be raised first, but, maybe we could call it initiation by fire. And probably there is nothing that can be done about it, but, I can assure you it is nothing to joke about, nor to be discussed at Kitty's party. Katie you have already brought so much to this fledgling group, I would hate to lose your insight going forward and I know everyone else would agree.

Katie

[wannab]

I have heard some ladies talking about the number of men in TV that were either "looking for a nurse or a purse, or something that they were not prepared to give". I hope all you wonderful people don't run into this type of mentality often. One time is one time too many.

[Geewiz]

If my STD line offended - sorry - it was just a joke. A singles soiree is a great idea and I am totally in...I offered to play some guitar...but, this shouldn't be "The Gary Show" maybe a couple of Beatle songs...maybe Walk Away Renee....and Prayer for Chacha and maybe some melodic looping for ambiance. I can sing - but if someone wants to sing instead of me...let me know, we can work it up. Also, if someone flirts...you might get a song written for you on the spot.

In all seriousness - Sumter is not ground zero for STDs...there are maps of these things. Hell, at our age, sex is less important than kindness and care...though sex is still a great thing. Find someone you really care for and when the friendship gets to that point...have a date to get tested. Sex is better with love and love is a sacred thing.

Still - here is a song about sex...

Red Red Sky

Let me drown
Set me in the waters so deep
Deep into the waters of love
And dive
The pushing and the wasting
The tasting of the coma of love
Beneath the Red Red Sky

Don't even speak
Just let me run my lips over
Skin and hair...the body of love
Don't sleep
Just couple and uncouple
The deep and dark uncoupling of love
Beneath the Red Red Sky
Beneath the Red Red Sky
I am drawn into the light
I am drawn into the light
I am drawn into the...

Airports and Airplanes

When I was a child I always dreamed
When I was a child I always dreamed

Well damn me and doubt my intentions
Well damn me and doubt my intentions
Well damn me and doubt my intentions

I'm still a child

Leave me notes
A date and an address
I need no explanation
Just you to free and feel alive with pressing
The deep insane caressing of love
Beneath the Red Red Sky
Beneath the Red Red Sky
I am drawn into the light
I am drawn into the light
I am drawn into the...

[kittygilchrist]

It isn't good that Katie is offended. I'm truly sorry about that. In my view the discussion has been genuine and respectful and appropriately humorous, thanks to Geewiz. It is healthy for us to openly discuss concerns about our reputation, and to figure out how to fit into single life here and to laugh at ourselves and the silly std rumors.

I feel engaged in a meaningful dialogue on the singles forum, and that includes Katie's viewpoint.
The party is ON, and Geewiz, you are awesome! Keep those songs and humor coming. I can't wait to meet you!
Kitty

Oh, my...here we go again contributing to the STD rumor.

Kitty, sorry, I have to back out...this thread has really turned South. I don't want to go to a party to talk about STDs...too serious for polite or fun conversation and certainly not a way to get to know one another. It would gross me out. That is something that should privately be discussed between two consenting adults.

Ya'll have fun though. You are going to have a lot of Singles show up and finally get to meet each other. In the meantime, I think I will be putting the wedding ring back on.

And, Katie, NO that was not what I was talking about. I am too polite...did not even occur to me.

Katie

[DianeM]

Katie,

I really wish that you would reconsider leaving the group. You certainly have every reason to be upset with the posts that neither respect, nor understand what we are trying to accomplish here. My reaction was the same, but, I know they do not represent the rest of us. We want to bring issues to the table that are particularly unique to the Singles living in TV. But, unfortunately some problems will not be easy to discuss or resolve and this STD rumor is apparently one of those that is truly sickening, but nonetheless a potential problem for all of us. I was shocked to find out that some of the women who posted had had to ensure snide remarks about living in TV. It made me angry and I don't even live there. It's unfortunate that this issue happened to be raised first, but, maybe we could call it initiation by fire. And probably there is nothing that can be done about it, but, I can assure you it is nothing to joke about, nor to be discussed at Kitty's party. Katie you have already brought so much to this fledgling group, I would hate to lose your insight going forward and I know everyone else would agree.

Katie

Seems as if I really opened up a can of worms with an offhand remark about a subject that I found annoying when I mentioned I was moving to TV. No offense was ever intended nor was it a subject I ever planned a long discussion about. Just an offhand comment - nothing more.

[kittygilchrist]

Diane, It's all OK. I'm sorry Katie was upset. I only wish you could come to the party, so we'll have another one after you get here! I am totally ok with your comments and everyone else's. I hope you will continue to feel free to post your concerns in a genuine and honest way...it's the only way to connect with others in a way that isn't shallow. I want to be in a community of singles who are tolerant and open.
Kitty

[redwitch]

kitty, I may have to rethink my position -- can I hide in a bedroom and play with Emma? I LOVE boxers (people can come visit us but not too many at once rofl). They are such, sweet funny dogs!!!!

[katerogers]

What say we put this particular problem on the back burner and move on. If nothing else we've accomplished our initial objective - this was certainly an 'engaging' discussion. Diane, you actually did us a favor - we can't be afraid to discuss the tough stuff. There is always going to be controversial issues and differences of opinion. That is at the foundation of this thread and our society. Kitty is right, to make this project successful we have to be tolerant and open. We may just need to find the right balance. Katie R

[DianeM]

AMEN !!! Let's move on. I'm dying to hear how the get together next weekend goes.

[Geewiz]

kitty, I may have to rethink my position -- can I hide in a bedroom and play with Emma? I LOVE boxers (people can come visit us but not too many at once rofl). They are such, sweet funny dogs!!!!

Does this mean if Mike Tyson comes and nibbles on your ear you'd be a happy camper?

[Cgirmo]

This sounds like it would be such a fun evening...it such a shame I am 900 miles and 2 years away!

[redwitch]

Does this mean if Mike Tyson comes and nibbles on your ear you'd be a happy camper?

Um, no. But if Emma licked my face, I would be.

[Geewiz]

I love the soiree concept and I'm in....especially if my face is licked (a joking reference to an earlier post)....can I also suggest an additional possibility -

I just bought a Disney annual pass and joined a meetup group called Walk with Disney that goes to a different park each week. The cool thing is the group includes some mouse employees and lines can be bypassed. This is exercise and connections and fun. Consider it another option. ps - with an annual pass you don't have to kill yourself...just a couple of hours each week. Plus - I'll drive and have free parking (just lick my face - joke).

[thelegges]

I love the soiree concept and I'm in....especially if my face is licked (a joking reference to an earlier post)....can I also suggest an additional possibility -

I just bought a Disney annual pass and joined a meetup group called Walk with Disney that goes to a different park each week. The cool thing is the group includes some mouse employees and lines can be bypassed. This is exercise and connections and fun. Consider it another option. ps - with an annual pass you don't have to kill yourself...just a couple of hours each week. Plus - I'll drive and have free parking (just lick my face - joke).

not single g but when i come full time i would love to walk disney

[DianeM]

I love the Disney idea. I live in Orlando now and hardly ever go to the Mouse House because no one wants to go anymore around here.

[kittygilchrist]

haha! Redwitch, Emma and I have got you now! Emma is a certified therapy dog and guaranteed to make us all feel better, especially those of us who know how to scratch her wagging butt! Please DO come! Emma will love you!


kitty, I may have to rethink my position -- can I hide in a bedroom and play with Emma? I LOVE boxers (people can come visit us but not too many at once rofl). They are such, sweet funny dogs!!!!

[kittygilchrist]

This sounds like it would be such a fun evening...it such a shame I am 900 miles and 2 years away!

darn! we'll have a party at your house when you get here!
Kitty

[kittygilchrist]

awesome idea! I'm bringing family to Disney in a few days and will check into the annual pass. nice offer that you'll drive.
I love the soiree concept and I'm in....especially if my face is licked (a joking reference to an earlier post)....can I also suggest an additional possibility -

I just bought a Disney annual pass and joined a meetup group called Walk with Disney that goes to a different park each week. The cool thing is the group includes some mouse employees and lines can be bypassed. This is exercise and connections and fun. Consider it another option. ps - with an annual pass you don't have to kill yourself...just a couple of hours each week. Plus - I'll drive and have free parking (just lick my face - joke).

[DianeM]

and at mine too when I get there

[DianeM]

The annual pass runs around $400 with no block out dates and includes parking. There is a cheaper annual with block out dates and no parking at around $250 (I think). The block out dates are usually July/August and the two weeks surrounding Easter and Christmas/New Year's.

[kittygilchrist]

OK gang! thanks for this thread to Kate...for whom we must have another party when the time is right for her. The following people will receive my address by pm for the party:
geewiz, who will sing for his supper
chachacha/Diane
newbeginnings/Debbie
2bntv/Joe
carolsells/Carol
maybe/Bill
retiredsfw/Sandra
SusanG/Susan
TVmayor/Ron
Rgraves/Ronnye
So we have room for a dozen more, so please invite anyone whose company you enjoy or who might be new here and I'll send them the address too. If you just happened by this thread and are single, let me know you want to come!
Kitty's house on Amherst Way in Gilchrist, Sat, May 16, 6 pm, potluck, byob.
Kitty
ps we could use some more side dishes to chicken entrée as the menu is looking good with 3 main dishes, 2 appetizers, 2 sides and 1 dessert.

[kittygilchrist]

and at mine too when I get there

see, we're friends already and you aren't here yet! can't wait to meet you and come to your home.
Kitty

[Geewiz]

If you go 3 times a month...again, for just a few hours each time...this is exercise and camaraderie....the price of the pass is minimal and they have payment plans. Plus, if we connect, the making out on the boat in Pirates of the Caribbean will more than make up for the few hundred dollars...just sayin'.

[kittygilchrist]

G, but I wanted a honeymoon with private endless circling of Small World....:girlneener:

[Geewiz]

G, but I wanted a honeymoon with private endless circling of Small World....:girlneener:

I actually saw that at the New York's World Fair in 1964. I did not make out back then...I've learned better since.

I'm starting to rehearse (aside from lead guitar work - I haven't played and sang in public for a few years)...again, if anyone wants to sing or has a request...let me know. I'll also bring an amp and IPOD - though you don't have to listen to my choices.

[katerogers]

OK gang! thanks for this thread to Kate...for whom we must have another party when the time is right for her. The following people will receive my address by pm for the party:
geewiz, who will sing for his supper
chachacha/Diane
newbeginnings/Debbie
2bntv/Joe
carolsells/Carol
maybe/Bill
retiredsfw/Sandra
SusanG/Susan
TVmayor/Ron
Rgraves/Ronnye
So we have room for a dozen more, so please invite anyone whose company you enjoy or who might be new here and I'll send them the address too. If you just happened by this thread and are single, let me know you want to come!
Kitty's house on Amherst Way in Gilchrist, Sat, May 16, 6 pm, potluck, byob.
Kitty
ps we could use some more side dishes to chicken entrée as the menu is looking good with 3 main dishes, 2 appetizers, 2 sides and 1 dessert.

Kitty,
You might have to call in reinforcements - Has anyone noticed we've had 2,594 hits on our site already.

[Geewiz]

Kitty,
You might have to call in reinforcements - Has anyone noticed we've had 2,594 hits on our site already.

It's the same 10 people anxious to meet.

[kittygilchrist]

I have an ipod and bose system if that helps...can you do Elvis?I actually saw that at the New York's World Fair in 1964. I did not make out back then...I've learned better since.

I'm starting to rehearse (aside from lead guitar work - I haven't played and sang in public for a few years)...again, if anyone wants to sing or has a request...let me know. I'll also bring an amp and IPOD - though you don't have to listen to my choices.

[katerogers]

It's the same 10 people anxious to meet.

Does that mean if they hook-up our ratings will plummet?

[kittygilchrist]

Here's a pic off the lanai...I'm excited to be in a new home, and look forward to sharing it with friends!
Kitty

[Geewiz]

I have an ipod and bose system if that helps...can you do Elvis?

Did you know Elvis died due to constipation and a cruddy heart....I avoid Elvis as the closest I want to get to Elvis is Kissin' Cousins.

[kittygilchrist]

no, I am shocked to hear all of that! Hound dog always gets the crowd up. guess we'd need percussion anyway.

[katerogers]

I have heard some ladies talking about the number of men in TV that were either "looking for a nurse or a purse, or something that they were not prepared to give". I hope all you wonderful people don't run into this type of mentality often. One time is one time too many.

Wannabe,

Sorry we missed your post. Preparations are underway for our first get-together at Kitty's. So, the posts have been moving pretty fast. Since, I am living at TV vicariously for now, let's throw out your question to those in the know.

Can anyone respond to Wannabe's question? Have you run into men who are 'looking for a nurse or a purse"? Does that fit in with the whole 'entitlement' discussion? They'd better not look in my direction.

KatieR

[Geewiz]

The actual term is nurse with a purse...for me...I'm just looking for a fellow adventurer and safe harbor at the end of the day

[kittygilchrist]

G, your post reminded me of a fave poem:

Wild nights - Wild nights!
Were I with thee
Wild nights should be
Our luxury!


Futile - the winds -
To a Heart in port -
Done with the Compass -
Done with the Chart!


Rowing in Eden -
Ah - the Sea!
Might I but moor - tonight -
In thee!

[RETIREDSFW]

Since i don't drink, does anyone want a ride? I live in santo domingo & can pick up 4 people??? If so, send me a pm with your phone number & i will call you and get directions to your house. I am still learning roads and using a map.
Sandra

[DianeM]

The actual term is nurse with a purse...for me...I'm just looking for a fellow adventurer and safe harbor at the end of the day

The adventure is what makes this trip of life worthwhile. Well said !!

[DianeM]

see, we're friends already and you aren't here yet! can't wait to meet you and come to your home.
Kitty

Thanks Kitty - I feel the same way. There will be a party at CasaM at some point as well.

[DianeM]

I actually saw that at the New York's World Fair in 1964. I did not make out back then...I've learned better since.

I'm starting to rehearse (aside from lead guitar work - I haven't played and sang in public for a few years)...again, if anyone wants to sing or has a request...let me know. I'll also bring an amp and IPOD - though you don't have to listen to my choices.

OMG Gee we must have crossed paths at the fair. As a New Yorker, I remember it well. We went there all the time. It was fairly cheap admission and you got there on the #7 train. Thanks for the memory.

[DianeM]

Yeow Kitty that's gorgeous. Mine is much much smaller. 28 feet by 8-1/2 feet.

[kittygilchrist]

thank you! the house isn't large, but the view is just what I wanted!

[Geewiz]

btw- this is Tuesday's adventure - Riding, Walking & Making Friends! -Animal Kingdom- (Tuesdays) - Walking for Fun at Disney (Orlando, FL) - Meetup (http://www.meetup.com/Walking-for-Fun-at-Disney/events/116475452/?a=me1_evn&rv=me1&_af_eid=116475452&_af=event)

And this is the song I just re-arranged as a tender art song:

Walk Away Renee


And when I see the sign that points “One Way”
The lot we used to pass by everyday

Just walk away Renee
You won’t see me follow you back home
The empty sidewalks on my block are not the same
You’re not to blame

From deep inside the fear that I forced aside
From deep inside the pain that I chose to hide

Just walk away Renee
You won’t see me follow you back home
Now as the rain beats down upon my weary eyes
For me it cries

[middle 8]

Just walk away Renee
You won’t see me follow you back home
Now as the rain beats down upon my weary eyes
For me it cries

Your name and mine inside a heart upon a wall
Still find a way to haunt me though they’re so small

Just walk away Renee
You won’t see me follow you back home
The empty sidewalks on my block are not the same
You’re not to blame

[kittygilchrist]

rip your heart out love song....hurts, owww.

[Geewiz]

rip your heart out love song....hurts, owww.

Want a broken heart...this was written for my son... now a great musician ....we will tear up the Beatlemaniacs in July...he is a massive, stone cold massive drummer

LULLABY


Sweet boy in my arms
Rest your weary head
Your daddy is here to keep you
So safe in my arms - now, lay down
And listen to me
Know what I say

You're never alone
I'll always be there
Warm and close to your side
Come fair or hard times, my darlin'
Oh, don't ever doubt me
Come night or day

I was alone when I was young
And there I swore there'd come a day
When I could hold on to my son
And rectify all that was done

Young boys will grow up
And you will grow, too
Someday you'll raise a family
And maybe one night
In your arms
You'll sing to your son
And think of me

Oh may you grow strong
May you grow wise
May you build all of your dreams
And may you love the way that I've loved
And will always love you - Sam

[kittygilchrist]

Ok, that does it. I'm selling tickets for your performance at my house...no getting in free...

on the subj of parenting, I got the most amazing mother's day card from my son Will.... "your love is unconditional". wow, he gets me.

[chachacha]

so happy to see all the posts blossoming...i have two days left on a disney pass, this whole year at sea world and busch gardens, and love the idea of going for a walk at any of these places.. am hoping to invite a couple of guys to the soiree! as for the nurse with a purse, i am neither so have not been sought out that way :) am looking forward to meeting those i do not already know! keep the posts coming!

[Geewiz]

Ok, that does it. I'm selling tickets for your performance at my house...no getting in free...

on the subj of parenting, I got the most amazing mother's day card from my son Will.... "your love is unconditional". wow, he gets me.

Hey - I'm even the guy who told ex-wife Voldemort, that she was a great mom to our boy and wished her a happy mother's day. I got a bunch of mother's day wishes...but, that's cause I am a different kinda mother.

If E doesn't go to NYC she will come as my roady...guys...this is someone you want to know. Hell, I want to know her - but, I am very careful with boundaries. I would rather be a great friend than a rejected boyfriend. Such is life in TV. Guys - make her happy...for me.

[DianeM]

The Disney idea is an awesome one. Great adventures and wandering with new friends. Sounds like a plan to me.

[Geewiz]

Tomorrow?

I keep listening to this old Smiths' song -

Why pamper life's complexity
When the leather runs smooth
On the passenger seat


I would go out tonight
But I haven't got a stitch to wear
This man said "It's gruesome that someone so handsome should care"


A jumped up pantry boy
Who never knew his place
He said "return the ring"
He knows so much about these things
He knows so much about these things


I would go out tonight
But I haven't got a stitch to wear
This man said "It's gruesome that someone so handsome should care"
Na, na-na, na-na, na-na, this charming man ...
Na, na-na, na-na, na-na, this charming man ...

[kittygilchrist]

Voldemort, who needs you, you narcisssissst emphasis on the hisss.

Hey - I'm even the guy who told ex-wife Voldemort, that she was a great mom to our boy and wished her a happy mother's day. I got a bunch of mother's day wishes...but, that's cause I am a different kinda mother.

If E doesn't go to NYC she will come as my roady...guys...this is someone you want to know. Hell, I want to know her - but, I am very careful with boundaries. I would rather be a great friend than a rejected boyfriend. Such is life in TV. Guys - make her happy...for me.

[DianeM]

Can't wait to move now folks next month. Seems as if there are a lot of good people and good stuff to do. Now to get packing again !!!

[OldManTime]

I have lived here in the Villages going on 11 years now, and still say "Find me a better place to live, and i'll move" having said that, when i came here, it was so much different than now days, it was party time for the first few years, with all my single friends (Disney for seniors), we were a group of about 20 singles, but as we age, a few have passed on, a few married, or cohabited which a majority do, and you loose interest, your values change, even the environment around you, and your health plays a big factor.
"Find me a better place to live, and i'll move"

[DianeM]

Tomorrow?

I keep listening to this old Smiths' song -

Why pamper life's complexity
When the leather runs smooth
On the passenger seat


I would go out tonight
But I haven't got a stitch to wear
This man said "It's gruesome that someone so handsome should care"


A jumped up pantry boy
Who never knew his place
He said "return the ring"
He knows so much about these things
He knows so much about these things


I would go out tonight
But I haven't got a stitch to wear
This man said "It's gruesome that someone so handsome should care"
Na, na-na, na-na, na-na, this charming man ...
Na, na-na, na-na, na-na, this charming man ...

I can't do tomorrow but I look forward to maybe going next month. What a great idea.

[TVMayor]

Since i don't drink, does anyone want a ride? I live in santo domingo & can pick up 4 people??? If so, send me a pm with your phone number & i will call you and get directions to your house. I am still learning roads and using a map.
Sandra
Sandra volunteers to be a designated driver.
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3265/2610038054_68a530a863.jpg

[RETIREDSFW]

I love it, but i have a gmc terrain, not a bug. We could probably get that many in but where do we put the food???
Sandra

[Geewiz]

Do we have an address? Opinion - do you prefer electric or quiet acoustic?

Plus, I need to stop tearing up with Walk Away Renee...I am such a sap.

[kittygilchrist]

for love songs, acoustic, aw, sorry bout Renee..

[kittygilchrist]

Gee, I'm just hugging my dog, Emma and wondering if you could do "I got you babe"???

[kittygilchrist]

Hey guys, you who are coming to the party should have my address now...I can't wait to meet my inner circle! If you can't find it, pm me. I sent you my addy and cell.
Kitty
ps is G awesome or what?

[katerogers]

This is a GENERAL UPDATE for all the SINGLE RESIDENTS that are currently living in The Villages, as well as SINGLES MOVING TO TV at sometime in the future. The initial thread opened with:

Let's face it, when you're single, moving to a new community it is a lot more challenging than taking that step into the unknown as a couple. Granted, we are likely to have varied back stories, we most likely adapt to a new environment differently and our ability to make new friends may run from 'a piece of cake' to 'pulling teeth. So, it would be helpful to hear from the singles (male and female) who have already had this experience. What was it like for you when you first moved to TV? What were your expectations and how did your socialization get it's start? How long did it take for you to feel like you belonged or are you still waiting? Please don't hesitate to mention the good with the bad. You're still here, after all, so even if the road was rocky at first it must have smoothed out eventually. And we could benefit from your "would a", 'could a', 'should a'.

Since that first post, this thread has evolved through the contributions of many singles, both living in TV and those who are looking to move to TV sometime in the future. In quoting some of the posts that best describe the focus of this thread, we hope you will feel welcome to ask the questions that are unique to the single population, or offer your thoughts on issues that you have faced or are concerned about.

-"I don't know why the singles posts seem so sterile of engaging comments to this point"

-"Why are there so few recent, meaningful discussions that affect the singles of TV. There are so many threads (oh, so many), with ambiguous titles and outdated posts that it's almost impossible to track down the subjects you're searching for and you feel foolish for starting another thread that has already been brought up - even though no one actually answered the question".

-" It would be helpful to share real experiences, to offer advice for the single newcomer, or to even suggest ways to avoid the social pitfalls, that most newcomers fall into, it will go a long way to ease any concerns of long term singles or just help us to feel connected."

- "This may be an impossible undertaking, but wonderfully convenient for those who would rather spend less time searching and more time 'doing' - to work toward a more organized single forum for a continuous evolving, open discussion where any topics unique to the single resident can be added, discussed thoughtfully and not judged."

-"Met some of "entitled men" who have approached me with the line " Well, here I am " and don't do anything except sit and stare waiting for me to do all the conversation work and ask all about them, met one who turned out to be married and couldn't understand why I would not date him again, told me I had a problem, and met another one who told me all about his libido. I have to laugh about some the experiences now and it's only been 6 months here. I am too new at this to take anything away from my experience, I am still learning all about this new life and living in TV and like hearing from the other singles on this forum."

-"I think we all have some issues that would liked to be addresses, but are afraid to post. Maybe those of us who are posting, could continue and it might bring others out of the woodwork."

-"It also goes to show how some of the single residents are either disinterested in the issues that most impact them or there aren't enough who are willing to band together to bring about change. _ wrote an important post about the unfairness in the distribution of the ID badges. From her, I learned that the single residents are being shortchanged, which causes problems for those who are dating or have friends who are not residents of TV. She was trying to do something about it not just vent,

-"Don't give up on the possibility of finding a deep love.... there is a home for every heart...despite the posers and libido obsessed.

theseare but a sampling of the pages of posts here, but we hope you can see we are trying to continue to develop a meaningful, proactive thread that will go on to give you an outlet to express your particular philosophies or bring issues to the other singles who may have already dealt with and have figured out how resolve the problem.

THE BONUS -The 'FOR SINGLES ONLY - ALLIANCE" - (Admittedly my suggested name- that no one has even acknowledged - Hey, at least I came up with something to identify us) has also become an overnight SOCIAL NETWORK, As you can probably tell from all the back and forth posts about the UPCOMING -FOR SINGLES ONLY PARTY, being held by Kitty next Saturday. It wasn't long before the men and women singles on this thread decided it would be a lot of fun to get together socially. Whether you become regular poster or simply enjoy reading the posts, it seems like this network is an added bonus that will also continue, with more participants scheduling get-togethers in the future.

If you are new to this thread or missed the open party information -set for this weekend-, I am going to let Kitty post about the party details, so if you're interested in joining us, you'll know who has graciously offered her home for strangers to become friends. Pretty awesome, wouldn't you agree?

Okay, I'm outta here - hope to see some new names posted here soon.

KATIE R

[Geewiz]

As you can probably tell from all the back and forth posts about the UPCOMING -FOR SINGLES ONLY PARTY, being held by Kitty next Saturday.
KATIE R

I hear it's a sleep over...bring your PJs.

Popcorn, board games, and cheap wine. Don't snore!!!!

[kittygilchrist]

haha. I could handle that pj pary, but bring your own towel. crap. I'm out of popcorn.

[CarolSells]

I hear it's a sleep over...bring your PJs.

Popcorn, board games, and cheap wine. Don't snore!!!!

Sleep over? Geewiz, can we girls do your hair? I'll bring rollers!

:pepper2:

[Geewiz]

Sleep over? Geewiz, can we girls do your hair? I'll bring rollers!

:pepper2:

I love being "done"

[CarolSells]

I love being "done"

This thread is heading south again!

:girlneener:

[katerogers]

This thread is heading south again!

:girlneener:

Yes, it is. Come on guys, give me and the thread a break. Enough, already. I'm really trying to put this back on track and you're not helping.

[Geewiz]

So - moving on....this is a song by my mentor Micheal Smith....it's about finding love in the tropics - buy his cd's

In Cuba they're crazy
Love to tango all night long
They're super hot baby
Hey baby vamos along
When the tropical moon she is shining
Like an orange or a lemon or lime
Anything rhymes
We will shoot for the moon
In the tropical sky
We will shoot for the moon
And our love will be high
And then when we get there
We'll let them all know
That our love is as rare as Caribbean Snow

This city's my lover
And women are its fingers and ears
Blue tango's my cover
Rain tangled city of tears
When the carnival moon she is shining
Over places and spaces and times
Anything rhymes
We will shoot for the moon
In the carnival sky
We will shoot for the moon
And our love will be high
And then when we get there
We'll let them all know
That our love is as rare as Caribbean Snow

In Cuba they're crazy
Love to tango all night long
In Cuba they're crazy
Love to tango all night long
You're waiting for me
I'm waiting for you
Both of us waiting
Time syncopating
Everybody's doing it
They're doing it to you

Oh Cuba sun baby
Where have all your tangos gone
Ah Dona Lecuona
Is dreaming and singing a song
When the crystal ball moon she is shining
Over fields of sugar cane
Suddenly rain
We will shoot for the moon
In the crystal ball sky
We will shoot for the moon
And our love will be high
And then when we get there
We'll let them all know
That our love is as rare as Caribbean Snow

Oh Cuba sun baby
Where have all your tangos gone

[queasy27]

Perhaps a distinction (or a new thread) be made between being single in TV and dating in the TV?

For myself, I still work full time and enjoy my own company, but I wouldn't mind meeting a few other women for the occasional lunch or movie. Nothing wrong with married people, mind you, but socializing with them often requires me to specify that an invitation is "girls only" and then the wife is offended because of the implication that I don't want to spend time with her husband. Which may or may not be true. :-)

I've moved by myself to many places over the years and the only difference I can see here is that there are so many more clubs and activities available. Why, I hear tell there are even a few liberals and Democrats around! If you're even a little bit outgoing, I don't see anyone having the least bit of trouble meeting welcoming, like-minded folks. Pretty much everyone here already shares the most encompassing commonality, which is our 55+ years of history.

[DianeM]

I like the way you think Queasy27. I will be moving to TV 3 weeks from today and while I'm somewhat nervous, I love all the things there are to do. I'm looking to for friends before anything else. I'm hoping for the best.

[asianthree]

My husband and I both have single friends and attend functions without each other...it's a good thing

[DianeM]

People are people regardless whether married or single.

[kfierle]

. . .Thank you for starting this thread.

As a single, I have had some of the same concerns as others. I am finally retiring at the end of June and will be able to use my villa and enjoy life in The Villages. I will be arriving for the winter season around the end of October-beginning of November time frame.

I wish I were going to be able to attend the get together being hosted by Kitty. I have been reading all the responses and everyone seems like the type of person I would like to know. I am not one to put myself "out there" but, I am going to force myself to do that in the fall. If someone plans a get-together in the fall (after I arrive), I hope I would be welcome to join the group.

It is nice to know that there are others who share the same concerns about being single and finding friends in the Villages.

[Cgirmo]

And Kitty must give details of the potluck which is happening as I type for all of the out of towners!

[Sunny08]

Hi Katie
I just moved down permanently a month ago. I'm working PRN a few hours per month here after years of full-time work. So to fill my extra free time I plan to stay busy with the different exercise and line dance classes. Being single, you have to keep yourself motivated especially at first. Then I think meeting people and joining groups, they will keep you motivated. I noticed there are some single groups. I'm going to check those out. Plus, there are drive way parties around, too. There are so many things to do here, you have to decide and schedule. Having a dog helps out, too. They get you out. I've met so many people walking my Schnauzer Patrick. Looking forward to making close friends here at TV.

[kittygilchrist]

And Kitty must give details of the potluck which is happening as I type for all of the out of towners!

A virtual party! I could have skyped it but I don't know how!
the boxer, Emma, barked dutifully as each person came in. She never gave up and 19 barking episodes was a serious responsibility, but I was happy to see a larger crowd than I expected. For more info, I posted a separate thread Kitty's party.

[katerogers]

. . .Thank you for starting this thread.

As a single, I have had some of the same concerns as others. I am finally retiring at the end of June and will be able to use my villa and enjoy life in The Villages. I will be arriving for the winter season around the end of October-beginning of November time frame.

I wish I were going to be able to attend the get together being hosted by Kitty. I have been reading all the responses and everyone seems like the type of person I would like to know. I am not one to put myself "out there" but, I am going to force myself to do that in the fall. If someone plans a get-together in the fall (after I arrive), I hope I would be welcome to join the group.

It is nice to know that there are others who share the same concerns about being single and finding friends in the Villages.

You're very welcome, but I must confess it was out of my own insecurities that prompted my initial post. What I have come to realize is that we all have doubts about making the move to TV. After all, who doesn't fear the unknown The reasons may vary, but, we all want to connect socially or we certainly wouldn't be moving to the Villages. What I can tell you is that if you're willing to put out your hand someone (actually many) will take it. Through these different threads I have come to know and make friends with so many. That is a phenomena that I never could have imagined.

And through parties like Kitty just had, friends you make online can become your new social circle. Others have already indicated they might be willing to host these get togethers in the future. Do I hear any volunteers for next month?

For some this is a more comfortable way to enter this new world than to walk into a singles group cold. Even if you've lived in TV for awhile, but haven't connected yet, hopefully others will pass the word that we exist.

Katie

[kittygilchrist]

aaah, good to see you Katie, your post and all the replies and readers made it clear that you and I are not the only ones trying to figure out what it's like to be in a subgroup of TV's fishbowl. I hope to be extra careful about dating if I decide to date, bc I've learned the hard way that one ex can poison your inner circle and your favorite hangouts.
Kitty

[katerogers]

aaah, good to see you Katie, your post and all the replies and readers made it clear that you and I are not the only ones trying to figure out what it's like to be in a subgroup of TV's fishbowl. I hope to be extra careful about dating if I decide to date, bc I've learned the hard way that one ex can poison your inner circle and your favorite hangouts.
Kitty

I guess the 'FOR SINGLES ONLY ALLIANCE' has not caught on. Personally, I like it a lot better than calling us members of the SINGLES SUBGROUP, even though it looks like that's what we're becoming. Good for you on the dating philosophy. If it's any consolation, none of us is without some kind of dating baggage.

Katie.

[kittygilchrist]

I wasn't trying to name it...I wanted to describe that it's a fishbowl inside a fishbowl.
I have to be careful about cursing, dating, what I say...it's good for me. I am making an especial effort to be tolerant of other viewpoints, chill and shut up when my buttons are pushed, make friends with everyone possible, make interdependent alliances with a few, make sure the tag of my clothes isn't out (means you are available), or get help pulling the tag out,
:chilout:
don't hang around the bar at Katie Belle's...
and I don't know what I don't know, so please tell me!
Kitty

[manaboutown]

aaah, good to see you Katie, your post and all the replies and readers made it clear that you and I are not the only ones trying to figure out what it's like to be in a subgroup of TV's fishbowl. I hope to be extra careful about dating if I decide to date, bc I've learned the hard way that one ex can poison your inner circle and your favorite hangouts.
Kitty

Whether it be in The Villages or Newport Beach where I currently reside dating within a community can certainly be problematic. If/when a relationship goes south which most dating relationships eventually do it is best to terminate them as pleasantly as possible. An amicable ending requires some form of closure and the cooperation of both parties. Unfortunately if when a relationships ends one partner is angry, bitter, vengeful or mentally just-not-right one's reputation can be at minimum blemished and at most destroyed.

When dating within a community proceed with caution!

[railroadman]

Whether it be in The Villages or Newport Beach where I currently reside dating within a community can certainly be problematic. If/when a relationship goes south which most dating relationships eventually do it is best to terminate them as pleasantly as possible. An amicable ending requires some form of closure and the cooperation of both parties. Unfortunately if when a relationships ends one partner is angry, bitter, vengeful or mentally just-not-right one's reputation can be at minimum blemished and at most destroyed.

When dating within a community proceed with caution!


Great advice! when I retire next year at the Villages, I will make sure
to date outside the community.

[DianeM]

At the risk of sounding like a "negative nell", I think too much is being made of marital status. Singles can be friends with marrieds and marrieds can be friends with singles. What on earth is the big deal? Not all single women are cougars and not all single men are lounge lizards. Can't we all just get along ???

[katerogers]

At the risk of sounding like a "negative nell", I think too much is being made of marital status. Singles can be friends with marrieds and marrieds can be friends with singles. What on earth is the big deal? Not all single women are cougars and not all single men are lounge lizards. Can't we all just get along ???

Diane,

Personally, I feel the same way you do, but then I'm coming from a recent divorce so paring up is the last thing on my mind. But, let's face it, it's human nature to couple.

I am going to put this out there for the men, in our fishbowl. A guy friend told me that men don't have single girl 'friends'. Or, at least, there is always some kind of sexual undertone, whether they feel they can act on it or not.

I may not be articulating his message exactly they way he expressed it, but you get the drift.

Kitty, that was supposed to be a joke - albeit, poorly executed- I would never think that, if we did give the group a name, that would be your choice.

Katie

[kittygilchrist]

Katie,
My sense of humor is whacky and whimsical. Fishbowlers? oh, even better Bowlfishers?!!:ho:

[DianeM]

Diane,

Personally, I feel the same way you do, but then I'm coming from a recent divorce so paring up is the last thing on my mind. But, let's face it, it's human nature to couple.

I am going to put this out there for the men, in our fishbowl. A guy friend told me that men don't have single girl 'friends'. Or, at least, there is always some kind of sexual undertone, whether they feel they can act on it or not.

I may not be articulating his message exactly they way he expressed it, but you get the drift.

Kitty, that was supposed to be a joke - albeit, poorly executed- I would never think that, if we did give the group a name, that would be your choice.

Katie

I'm sorry but I don't buy the idea that men can't be friends with women without sexual feelings. I've had guy friends - and no, they were not gay - who were good friends and we'd hang out and do things we both liked to do. Nothing wrong with watching a cable movie at each other's house with a cup of coffee or a glass of wine and just enjoying each other's company without it becoming a romp.

[maybe]

I agree they can be just friends. If there were no male/female friendships without sex, I doubt the phrase "friends with benefits" would have come into use.

[DianeM]

I agree they can be just friends. If there were no male/female friendships without sex, I doubt the phrase "friends with benefits" would have come into use.

Good one.

[manaboutown]

I agree they can be just friends. If there were no male/female friendships without sex, I doubt the phrase "friends with benefits" would have come into use.

I have many female friends, both single and married, in whom I have never had the least bit of sexual or romantic interest. I count some of my best and closest friends among them.

[OnTrack]

...........

[katerogers]

I'm sorry but I don't buy the idea that men can't be friends with women without sexual feelings. I've had guy friends - and no, they were not gay - who were good friends and we'd hang out and do things we both liked to do. Nothing wrong with watching a cable movie at each other's house with a cup of coffee or a glass of wine and just enjoying each other's company without it becoming a romp.

I didn't say he was bright. But, given that I haven't a clue what goes on in a man's mind, I am hardly in a position to speak for them. I'm glad to hear, from the men folk here that there is hope for us all.

Katie

[kittygilchrist]

..........

[DianeM]

I have many female friends, both single and married, in whom I have never had the least bit of sexual or romantic interest. I count some of my best and closest friends among them.

Nice to hear someone agree. We can all like and respect each other.

[DianeM]

I didn't say he was bright. But, given that I haven't a clue what goes on in a man's mind, I am hardly in a position to speak for them. I'm glad to hear, from the men folk here that there is hope for us all.

Katie

I think we all want the same thing. Doesn't have to be a romantic matchup just a good bud to hang with.

[katerogers]

Kitty,

I read all the posts about that party. It was a great success. You got the FISHBOWLS off to a great start. Thank you again for volunteering. I hope the trend continues...

[DianeM]

..........

? Did I miss something?

[manaboutown]

? Did I miss something?

A photo of The Crab Cooker, a great seafood restaurant - only not in TV and not related to this topic.

[DianeM]

A photo of The Crab Cooker, a great seafood restaurant - only not in TV and not related to this topic.

Ahhhh - thanks for the update. I thought I was losing it. LOL.

[katerogers]

I ran across an old Cosmo that had an article I thought might be a great subject for this thread. It listed the top 10 complaints men have about women and women have about men. It was kind of an eye opener for me, at least where the men are concerned. So, it would be a kick to find out, if you think they got it right and what complaints do you think they missed.

MENS COMPLAINTS ABOUT WOMEN

- You like to play coy

- You fixate on what we're thinking

- You don't understand and/or like our need for alone time

- You have a complicated set of double standards

- You want us to change, and then lose respect for us when we do

- You see us as projects you can fix

- Your expectations are set by Hollywood

- You're always looking down the road

- You have a tendency to be critical

- You play hard to get

WOMENS COMPLAINTS ABOUT MEN

- You're all talk, no action

- You're dishonest about what you want

- You don't take the initiative or plan

- You don't listen

- You don't communicate, especially your feelings about anything

- You're not understanding enough

- You're not sensitive to feelings or needs

- Order and cleanliness are not that important

- You don't appreciate the efforts women make

- It's always about you

The one complaint I'd like an explanation for is this alleged set of complicated double standards we're supposed to have. What's that all about, gentlemen?

Katie

[kittygilchrist]

Kitty,

I read all the posts about that party. It was a great success. You got the FISHBOWLS off to a great start. Thank you again for volunteering. I hope the trend continues...

I can't stop loving "Bowlfishers" better than Fishbowl. I have a goofy sense of humor!

[kittygilchrist]

A photo of The Crab Cooker, a great seafood restaurant - only not in TV and not related to this topic.

and the long story is I reposted it from the original poster with a question how it related to singles, he was chastised by admin and removed it, so I removed my question about his post as well.

[TVMayor]

WOMENS COMPLAINTS ABOUT MEN

- You're all talk, no action

- You're dishonest about what you want

- You don't take the initiative or plan

- You don't listen

- You don't communicate, especially your feelings about anything

- You're not understanding enough

- You're not sensitive to feelings or needs

- Order and cleanliness are not that important

- You don't appreciate the efforts women make

- It's always about you

The one complaint I'd like an explanation for is this alleged set of complicated double standards we're supposed to have. What's that all about, gentlemen?

Katie
It is obvious no research was done for this article. It is also obvious the author talked only one person to compile this list, my ex-wife.

[katerogers]

Thanks for the laugh.

[kittygilchrist]

So Kate, give us an update....what's happening with you now re moving to TV?
Kitty
btw, this is an amazing thread...the best ones allow some rabbit trails but not too many.
Kitty

[OnTrack]

and the long story is I reposted it from the original poster with a question how it related to singles, he was chastised by admin and removed it, so I removed my question about his post as well.

To set the record straight, I wasn't chastised by admin.

I deleted it after being chastised..by you.

My apologies again.

.

[kittygilchrist]

thanks, ontrack. glad to know how this stuff works, it isn't easy.
Kitty

[TVMayor]

So Kate, give us an update....what's happening with you now re moving to TV?
Kitty
btw, this is an amazing thread...the best ones allow some rabbit trails but not too many.
Kitty
Rabbit trails, fish bowl, blow fish what is that, some kind of chick code? If you got something on your shoe say it like it is, shoe-polish.

[kittygilchrist]

Your honor, :bowdown:
rabbit trails=posts off topic.
Fishbowl=singles life in TV
Bowlfishers=laughing at ourselves as singles in TV.

Respectfully, please make me laugh, I know you can do it!
Kitty

[TVMayor]

Your honor, :bowdown:
rabbit trails=posts off topic.
Fishbowl=singles life in TV
Bowlfishers=laughing at ourselves as singles in TV.

Respectfully, please make me laugh, I know you can do it!
Kitty
You forgot one...
Love bugs=the people that come to The Villages for the winter.

[kittygilchrist]

oh dear, to my dismay, I get it...intuitive and nutty...well there you are. We have that in common, Ron!

[katerogers]

So Kate, give us an update....what's happening with you now re moving to TV?
Kitty
btw, this is an amazing thread...the best ones allow some rabbit trails but not too many.
Kitty

Kitty,

I'm aiming for September. It depends on whether I can find a 3/2 rental that doesn't require more blood than my body can still live on. Thanks for asking.

On another note...Is there a single male (or female for that matter) who can enlighten me as to what the "Complicated Double Standard" is that they are talking about, and we woman are supposedly guilty of? - As referred to in the Men's complaint list.

Also, here is your opportunity to list the ones that they missed.

Katie

[manaboutown]

I don't know who cooked up those Cosmo lists. Although a few make sense to me and are valid, many are ?????

The best book I ever read on the differences in men and women is written by an Australian husband and wife, Allan and Barbara Pease. It is entitled "Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps". It was a #1 international best seller, first published in 2001. I have a now very dog-eared 2009 edition. Mine I think I bought in Singapore. It was published in the UK, Australia, New Zealand and Asia according to the copyright notice page in my copy. I do not know if it has been published in the USA.

Some of the topics:

Why men can't do more than one thing at a time

Why women make such a mess of reverse parking

Why men should never lie to a woman

Why women talk so much and men so little

Why men love erotic images and women aren't impressed

Why women prefer simply to talk it through

Why men offer solutions but hate advice

Why women despair about men's silences

Why men lie and women cry

p.s. This video provides a few amusing revelations of differences between men and women. http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=L29KmQxEA3E

[KathieI]

I'm sorry but I don't buy the idea that men can't be friends with women without sexual feelings. I've had guy friends - and no, they were not gay - who were good friends and we'd hang out and do things we both liked to do. Nothing wrong with watching a cable movie at each other's house with a cup of coffee or a glass of wine and just enjoying each other's company without it becoming a romp.

I agree with Diane (and some others). What I have found here in TV is that I have quite a few male "friends" that are just that. We can hang together, go have a drink together, have dinner together, even dance together, without becoming romantically involved. I also have many, many married friends that I hang out with. Sometimes, we arrange our get-togethers so that the men don't get insulted that they aren't invited, LOL... And other times, we go out as couples and I am alone (as a single, which I am proud of).

I hope this post put this thread back on track???

[DianeM]

I agree with Diane (and some others). What I have found here in TV is that I have quite a few male "friends" that are just that. We can hang together, go have a drink together, have dinner together, even dance together, without becoming romantically involved. I also have many, many married friends that I hang out with. Sometimes, we arrange our get-togethers so that the men don't get insulted that they aren't invited, LOL... And other times, we go out as couples and I am alone (as a single, which I am proud of).

I hope this post put this thread back on track???


That's exactly what I want when I get to TV. I want no pressure just good friends to hang with and have a drink with, and yes, sometimes ask for help with. Married or single - we all need human contact. I too am ok with being single. It's really not a bad thing !!

[kittygilchrist]

What is singles life...thanks Katie, a world of good happening...
Charles escorted me (dating is not for me at this time) to McCall's last eve, where we bumped into Jim and Marianne. I knew Jim from dancing. The music was gritty dirt blues and I can't say when I've had such a good time on the floor.
Charles talked me into ignoring my "need" to get back to my puppy dog, and said I have to learn to stay up late, get up late, "the night is young"...so we went to City Fire and danced on...my animals were very happy to see me when I got home.
I guess if I'm gonna be single here, Emma and Raul will adapt to getting up at 8 instead of 6....
happy, come on down, Katie, it's :coolsmiley:
Kitty

[queasy27]

I too am ok with being single. It's really not a bad thing!!

This usually comes up at the doctor's office, but whenever someone asks me, "Do you live alone?" in that slightly worried and pitying voice, I reply, "Yes, thank goodness!"

As the saying goes, I like having a man in my life but not in my house.

[kittygilchrist]

Queasy, that image is shocking....I can't look at it...
I've been single 15 or so years...I don't live alone, I have an amazing kitty and boxer.

[queasy27]

Queasy, that image is shocking....I can't look at it...


Better? :-)

Another thing I wonder is why medical history forms always want me to check if I'm married/single/divorced/widowed/separated. Why differentiate? I gotta assume it's so that medical staff can evince the proper level of concern relative to what they believe is my sad emotional state of singlehood.

[katerogers]

I think this is the first time I've lived alone in my life and I absolutely LOVE IT! I can do what I want, when I want and don't have to compromise or account for anything. It's AWESOME! I could never give it up.

[kittygilchrist]

Oh Kate, I divorced over 10 years ago, turned down proposals, adopted an abandoned boxer with whom I have a love affair. Single rocks! I'm finding that close friends and dancing excel dating for being close without strings....have decided not to date. Life is so simply delightful.
Kitty

[KathieI]

There are too many Katie, Kitty's and Kathie's now on TOTV, LOL.. I'm getting confused, you know I'm OLD!!!!

I'm one of those weird people who although married for 30 years, I actually lived alone for most of my life. I love living alone, as someone said, do what I want, when I want, and if I don't feel like shutting lights,,, I DON'T HAVE TO.... :a040:

As a career girl living in Manhattan, I didn't have roommates, didn't want roommates and if it meant that I couldn't buy the new pair of shoes, I put newspapers in them rather than have someone sharing my apt with me. Told you I was weird...

[kittygilchrist]

Better? :-)

Another thing I wonder is why medical history forms always want me to check if I'm married/single/divorced/widowed/separated. Why differentiate? I gotta assume it's so that medical staff can evince the proper level of concern relative to what they believe is my sad emotional state of singlehood.

Oh yeah, better image...! I live near Bonifay, where flip flops were the theme for the Christmas tree!

[katerogers]

I think this article says it all about how living alone affects women v men. I hate to speak in generalities, because it always comes back to bite me in the derriere, but, I'll go out on a limb here and say that this is probably right on for most of us and it's a fun read.

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/01/08/fashion/why-men-cant-stand-to-be-alone-after-a-breakup-or-a-divorce.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0

[TVMayor]

I think this is the first time I've lived alone in my life and I absolutely LOVE IT! I can do what I want, when I want and don't have to compromise or account for anything. It's AWESOME! I could never give it up.
I see this said over and over it kind of trashes my dreams of settling down and starting a family.

[DianeM]

I think everyone needs their space. It's liberating to watch old movies all night rather than sleep.

[Bonnevie]

put my in the like living alone camp. I always said if I'm lonely then at least there is a reason...but having been lonely while living with someone--that's much worse.
I like to socialize, don't get me wrong, but I like going home to my own place...
nothing like snuggling on my sofa with my dogs snoring next to me....

[chachacha]

i happen to be visiting a married couple for a few days and when i awoke this morning i could hear their loving chit chat downstairs and remembered how wonderful it was to have another heartbeat near me, of one i dearly loved....i do love my independence and doing what i want when i want to but i also miss that aspect of a happy marriage. i guess everything in life is a choice but dogs snoring next to me would definitely not make me happy! sorry dear emma! :)

[Bonnevie]

I'm sure it's different if one had happy memories of a marriage...for me, I'll take the dogs

[KathieI]

i'm sure it's different if one had happy memories of a marriage...for me, i'll take the dogs

ditto!!!

[TVMayor]

I have memories of a happy marriage, I have memories of a marriage decaying. I have memories of things happening in the divorce total out of my control which effected what I worked for all my life. I remember when I was in my teens my 13 year old dog died, he was my best friend.

Today I would like nothing more than to have a happy marriage and a dog but I can not bare the thought of suffering the sorrow resulting from the loss of either one.

[kittygilchrist]

By this age, I've locked my heart away because wearing it on my sleeve didn't work out. Trying to be more open, but it's scary...and I like friends and my animals for now.
Kitty, not dating...

[katerogers]

In these last few posts everyone seems so sad. None of us have reached this age without having both wonderful and horrible memories. I would like to think that there is something for everyone in TV - For those with great memories of a marriage cut short or those - for which I am the poster boy - where the wounds are just too fresh to be willing to even consider another relationship. But for each of these memories and all those in between, isn't is possible to take from TV what best fits your current needs? From everything I've read about getting over the death of a spouse or that kind of death a divorce creates - and I've been through both - the best way to get through it and to come out pretty healthy in the end is 1. Make lots of friends, 2. Keep busy 3. Get a facelift - that last one is just on my wish list

Katie

[chachacha]

of course you are right, kate! and all those things can be accomplished here in the bubble, even #3.

[kittygilchrist]

this just in from newbie single reporter, Miss Kitty...
I'm finding it very easy to find male and female friends and go as a pack to dance events, and I hope somebody wants to see Iron Man. If I wanted a relationship, I could find that easily too, nevermind the buzz about ratio...
Finding a life love is another matter, I haven't had the knack for that, so it would be a huge surprise if that happened. btw that isn't sad, it's just true.
grateful to...Dianne/cha, loaned me her friends to get me started...and her hospitality...she's my hero...sorry Tony Stark....Cha rocks!

[katerogers]

Actually, the inside info I've gleaned from this thread has my curiosity peaked. Thanks to Kathie I finally learned what a 'nurse' with a 'purse' means - I'm embarrassed to admit, I had no idea what you guys were talking about. I'd love for some guy try that one on me. And the other is the whole 'entitlement' thing that was brought up early in the thread and Kitty just alluded to.

I can't wait for the opportunity to respond to that come on. Are there any more of these expressions unique to TV? Sorry, guys. I don't mean to be picking on you. I know that you can't label all men game players. It's just that all this is new to me. If there are more behaviors in the single world that have resulted in a 'name' unique to that behavior, I'd like to learn them- and it could be women who are game players, for all I know - but, as they say 'knowledge is power'...

Katie

[kittygilchrist]

Katie, I didn't mean to say anything about entitlement..
I'm pleasantly surprised at how many nice new friends I am finding of both sexes. It is necessary to have a partner at dances and I've found a couple of guys for that. I don't think it's beneficial to approach living here on the defensive. and not really possible to know how being here will feel until you are here.
I like it better than I thought I would. Not only is there something to do and somewhere to go all the time, there are nice people to make friends with.

[katerogers]

There's nothing wrong with being prepared. Fool me once and all that...

[RickinMinnesota]

Greetings all. TV is on my list of places for retirement. I can retire in the next 3-4 years. I would like to use my vacation time to plan my retirement. Born, raised and now working until retirement in MN. I am looking forward to retiring to a warm place. Had more than foot of snow this year in May!!!! Single for a few years, got one son, he is doing great. In great health, very active, have taken up running, run marathons last 3 years (and many shorter races), running groups at TV? I am in a position to take a couple weeks off in either Dec or Jan. Is this a good time to visit TV and get a real feel? :wave:

[asianthree]

Greetings all. TV is on my list of places for retirement. I can retire in the next 3-4 years. I would like to use my vacation time to plan my retirement. Born, raised and now working until retirement in MN. I am looking forward to retiring to a warm place. Had more than foot of snow this year in May!!!! Single for a few years, got one son, he is doing great. In great health, very active, have taken up running, run marathons last 3 years (and many shorter races), running groups at TV? I am in a position to take a couple weeks off in either Dec or Jan. Is this a good time to visit TV and get a real feel? :wave:

You can get a rental in December much easier for two weeks than January

[KathieI]

Yes, Rick, you should try to come in Dec. (as Asianthree says, it will be harder to get a rental in Jan but Dec might be easier). There are a few sites that you can go on to find the rentals. I'm not sure about running clubs, but many people run here on the city streets. Good luck and let us singles know when your coming...

[katerogers]

Welcome Rick from MN. You've been given good advice. Finding a reasonable rental after December is tough. I too am making a trip down to see what the Villages is all about and to meet all the friends I've made through this thread and others - Everyone is very supportive and willing to make the transition easy. I'm sure you'll enjoy your vacation.

Katie

[Sunny08]

ditto!!!




Double Ditto!!

[kittygilchrist]

Rick, do you know how to send a private message? I might have a deal for you for a december rental if you'll pm me I'll send more info.
Kitty

[RickinMinnesota]

Rick, do you know how to send a private message? I might have a deal for you for a december rental if you'll pm me I'll send more info.
Kitty

Hi Kitty, I would be interested Dec 15 - 20. Not able to take as much time in Dec as I was hoping this year.

[eddiemac]

I'd like to meet singles a few at a time so I really get to know you. I'm thinking of hosting small gatherings, not for the hundreds. Would you who are reading be interested in coming to my home?

That sounds fun

Sent from my SCH-I605 using Tapatalk 2

[sharonga]

My daughter is 35 and has a 6 year old daughter. She followed her dad and I here. She came with a mate and he is no longer in her life. She works in The Villages and lives 10 minutes away. She has no social life whatsoever. She is so unhappy here and wants to go back up north. Where do young people go to meet others, or do they?

[chachacha]

i think if you search this topic you will find an earlier thread. most of the wait staff at any of the restaurants and clubs are young, and there must be teachers at the schools in her age group....perhaps she could take a course or two at the Central Florida Community college in leesburg... church is a great place to meet someone! she could also try some of the dating sites, such as Plenty of Fish which is free. no matter our age, we all have to make an effort when we come here as a single person, but it turns out well for most, even the young people. :)

[kat3hay]

Which groups are best. Some of them are really crazy and do not want to mess around with those. Is there a rating system or something to tell me which ones are the best?

[Veronica]

want to find a male who will love you forever and always be true? get a dog!

ditto!!!

[TVMayor]

want to find a male who will love you forever and always be true? get a dog!

And the list gets shorter.

[jackcis]

Can i come by myself?????????????????

[jackcis]

I am in the same boat, would love to carry on a conversation with you. Jack

[Bonnevie]

at one time I was in a meet-up group called "Dinner for Eight" the idea was to limit the group to eight because it would provide enough for good conversation but not too many that everyone didn't get to know each other. I find large parties to be overwhelming sometimes and prefer smaller groups. recently we did lunch and a movie and that was fun. would like to do that again.

[JaniceOhio]

Look forward to meeting and joining all of you. I have much in common with many here and that's really nice to see.

[mdfan1970]

You get out of the Villages what you put into it. Easy place to meet friend and people with similar interest. You can be as busy as you want to include going out and dancing. Moreover, if you can dance no matter what you look like you will be asked to dance. Beware there are several guys who are married and their wives live out of state that hang out at City Fire.